An out of touch family man moves with his wife and daughter from the big city to his dream house on the outskirts of a small town just in time for the apocalypse.
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CortometraggiTrascrizione
00:00:00You
00:00:14So this is it yeah, this is it
00:00:22Sweetie you know how important this is to your father. Can you just try to give it a chance the roof needs work
00:00:27You're here for the summer so you can help me fix it or you can deal with it
00:00:31There's no service here. I'm gonna plant a garden. Why would you buy a house where there's no cell service?
00:00:36There is cell service in a room upstairs. You just have to
00:00:40Knock the window a little bit. I guess that's my room then great
00:00:44It's the bathroom am I being punished for something. I haven't been here 10 minutes, and you're already complaining
00:00:49Just give it a rest, please
00:00:52fine keys
00:00:56Oh
00:01:02Spence
00:01:03Spencer
00:01:05Hmm. She's going to need internet thought we agreed. We wouldn't let her grow up in front of the screen
00:01:09Yeah, we did and then she did it anyway because that's what teenagers do
00:01:13Come on. I just need a little bit of internet
00:01:20Love you
00:01:22Are you the comments
00:01:26It is unethical and it is down right NASA is a buzz today over a recent discovery that could
00:01:52I'm connected
00:01:55Text message phone call
00:01:57It's not for death
00:01:59Anyone care about all my friends know exactly where to find me when the world ends
00:02:08A simple life for me
00:02:12Cuz I wanna be free
00:02:16A simple life for me
00:02:20Yeah
00:02:21So stop looking at the screen
00:02:24So we can talk
00:02:27Hold my hand. We're gonna go for a walk
00:02:30I know a place the Sun shines through the trees. I'd love to lay down and kiss you
00:02:40The simple life for me
00:02:44Cuz I wanna be free
00:02:49Simple life
00:02:54I wanna go to heaven
00:03:03We shouldn't have to work this hard we can play by our own rules
00:03:08Oh
00:03:24That was love lies in fiction with simple life and I'm with your morning mix
00:03:29Good morning. What a beautiful day in downtown Oneonta plenty of sunshine on tap. She's still on the radio
00:03:35This place never changes
00:03:39All right
00:03:44Hello sir
00:03:46Internet store. Oh, we had a bunch of complaints about our service. So instead of fixing anything we just rebranded
00:03:54Well
00:03:56I'm here for some internet. Well, you've come to the right place
00:03:59Transfer a new account a new account. Well, it's not for me though. It's actually for my daughter, but
00:04:06I'm paying so I guess it's for me. Well, you can't ignore technology adapt your die
00:04:13What's the new address one one three Herrick Hill Road
00:04:20Oh, no, oh
00:04:24This isn't good at all sir
00:04:26You can't get internet like not even a little bit. Nope. You're right outside our service area
00:04:32You know, we could run a line to your house, which would cost
00:04:36Thirty three thousand four hundred twelve dollars son of a bitch. We'd be paying cash or card. No
00:04:44Good. There's got to be some kind of other option. We do offer a payment plan. No, I mean like a satellite or whatever
00:04:55Seems like the dishes can't get a signal there either weird
00:05:01Figures what are you gonna do?
00:05:05I
00:05:09Come on then
00:05:12Hey, hey there you are
00:05:14Sorry, I had to run upstairs. The service is great up here. How'd it go? No bad news. You can't get internet
00:05:22Not even a little bit. Nope
00:05:25We're outside the service area and satellites won't work either
00:05:29so
00:05:30How do we tell Zoe?
00:05:33He couldn't buy a house with working light bulbs she would like for you to buy some light bulbs
00:05:50Hey, excuse me, can you tell me?
00:05:55Kenny
00:05:56Spence
00:05:58So you did move back
00:06:00How do you know that you know small town, right? So how's your pops doing?
00:06:05Ah passed away a few years back. Yeah
00:06:09Left me the store. So I'm running things now. I'm sorry to hear that
00:06:13See tell me about these smart bulbs. Oh, man. Listen, those are super cool, man
00:06:17Everybody's buying these things now check us out. You can turn them on and off with an app. Yeah, you can even change the color
00:06:24Do you want to get some of those or no? No, I just stick with the dumb bulbs
00:06:28That's got cool. Hey, so where's the new house?
00:06:31Outskirts of town. Yeah a couple miles out. Oh, cool. Cool. Yeah. Well, thanks. Oh, I'm proud of me
00:06:38You know, I don't I don't need a bag. Oh, yeah, I got you
00:06:45So, how about
00:06:47Yourself you have family in town or nah, nah just a store
00:06:55Yeah
00:06:58Big news day, huh? Well, you didn't hear man. NASA's making some huge announcement. Yeah, they've been talking about it all day
00:07:05That's a bunch of bullshit. You guys know the earth is flat, right?
00:07:11Unless I know about the outside world the better
00:07:14Hey, listen, yeah, we should get together or something, you know grab a beer. Yeah sometime I gotta get back
00:07:20A number for you here. You know what? I just have so much. Oh, no one second. Let me uh, I mean
00:07:26Do that problem I should probably get going a lot of work to do. Here we go. Oh
00:07:33There we go, that's my sale great. All right. Thanks. Hey, I'm a good scene
00:07:42You do
00:07:50We're gonna switch over to them right now a
00:07:55Little over eight hours ago a near-earth object or NEO was spotted by one of our telescopes
00:08:01It was not detected earlier due to its trajectory originating from behind the Sun
00:08:06According to our admittedly early calculations
00:08:09We predict that an asteroid will strike somewhere within the continental United States within the next 72 hours
00:08:17We will have more information about its exact impact points in the near future, but we are now going to open up
00:08:25Come on now
00:08:27I'm sure everything's gonna be fine. We're in the middle of nowhere in upstate, New York
00:08:31Everything is not gonna be fine mom
00:08:33Even if it hits in the middle of Idaho it could start a chain reaction
00:08:36Supply chains breaking down power grids overloading not to even mention the environmental impact, sweetie
00:08:42Humans have been facing adversity since the dawn of time and no matter what comes our way
00:08:46We always find a way to figure it out
00:08:49Tell that to the dinosaurs
00:08:55Hi, this is Tom Simmons calling from news one
00:08:58How big is this asteroid our current calculations put it at 50 meters across?
00:09:03Burning down to approximately five meters once it gets through the atmosphere while small it can still do significant damage
00:09:11Hey
00:09:13Hey
00:09:21Excuse me. Hey, hello. Excuse me
00:09:32Hey
00:09:42It's gonna hit your house come again
00:09:48The asteroid
00:09:51No, they they said they don't even know where it's gonna hit trust me
00:09:55They know exactly where it's gonna hit and when
00:10:02They just don't want to start a panic
00:10:05yet
00:10:07Okay, who is it?
00:10:09Okay
00:10:10Who are you?
00:10:12Wilson live right up the road saw you guys moving in earlier
00:10:17figured I'd
00:10:19Come down
00:10:21Say hey
00:10:27Spencer just bought the place. I hope you kept the receipt
00:10:36Go
00:10:39Off my property
00:10:48Sweetie we have to be optimistic. Please. Stop calling me, sweetie
00:10:51I'm not good anymore and you can't just optimism your way through everything
00:11:00No internet, no
00:11:02No, yeah
00:11:04Great just great. You got some light bulbs. There you go. There you go
00:11:20You're welcome
00:11:24So thoughts thoughts about what the asteroid
00:11:31I
00:11:34Really don't think it's anything we have to worry about. It's probably gonna hit in Idaho or something. It's not a problem
00:11:43You guys gonna feed me tonight or am I just gonna starve
00:11:50She's right, we don't have any food in the house
00:11:52Okay, no, no, no, no, no, it's okay you don't have to go back out
00:11:56Well order delivery for dinner and then we can go to Nick's diner for breakfast. It just reopened, right?
00:12:02It'll be fun
00:12:05Thank you
00:12:06Big news has been brewing folks from NASA of all places and
00:12:11NASA of all places and
00:12:21Cool place, huh? Yeah, it's cute. Yeah
00:12:25How old is this place? Well, it was built about a hundred years ago. It was a popular spot on the railroad
00:12:32As long as the food doesn't give me the plague. Well, that was the
00:12:361400s not the 1900s
00:12:38Thought you were going to college next year
00:12:41I must have fallen asleep during plague class
00:12:44But one of these times you got to order your own five you never finish yours
00:12:50It's cuz I know you're gonna eat them. No, that's so sweet. Mm-hmm
00:12:55So you said you ran into one of your old friends at the hardware store Lenny?
00:13:00Kenny
00:13:03He's acquaintance, he's definitely not a friend. Well, maybe you can change that
00:13:07No, I don't think so, but is he an asshole or something Zoe
00:13:12No, he's just a guy. He never left
00:13:15And I'm too old for new friends
00:13:18What do you want to do today? We brought two vehicles for a reason. I
00:13:23Want to work on the house?
00:13:25Okay, can you do that?
00:13:28Zoe and I will go talk to the phone people, right Zoe
00:13:33Every time
00:13:36I
00:13:45Remember when she used to give everybody high-fives, but when she was two
00:13:50No, she's a teenager. They do two things. They mope and hate their parents for having them
00:13:55It's open. We'd skip that phase. Well, it is a phase. So the good news is she will grow out of it
00:14:02Someday something will happen that puts it all into perspective and then she will give you as many high-fives as you want
00:14:10Okay, I gotta get out of here good luck at the phone store, thank you
00:14:22Yeah, so what kind of classes would I be taking until I decided my major
00:14:27Hey, oh
00:14:32No, I mean, yeah, I guess that's fine I just I don't know I thought maybe
00:14:42NASA's press conference is going live in a few hours. Hopefully we're gonna learn where this asteroid is hitting and when
00:14:50The world has sent their thoughts and prayers to America
00:14:56Okay
00:15:12So
00:15:14How'd your interview go
00:15:18It was all right, I guess
00:15:21You guess I
00:15:24Don't know what I want to do with my life. My admissions counselor says photography isn't a job. I
00:15:32Just wanted to have a purpose
00:15:38Then again, I should probably pick somewhere to go so I don't have to stay in the middle of dad's midlife crisis
00:15:53I
00:16:24Hello, hey Kenny
00:16:31Dude Sunday day of rest
00:16:39Okay
00:16:41Well, listen, I was trying to get some painting done today and I ran out of primer. Oh you need primer
00:16:47Hey, I could swing by with a few cans. Are you sure?
00:16:54Hey, maybe after that we can go grab that beer, huh, I tell you what you bring me that primer and beers are on me
00:17:02Deal
00:17:12Phone store, I hate this town
00:17:19Hey folks, you just sign in
00:17:22I'm in the only ones here. Yes, but we need you to sign in you have to be shitting me Zoe
00:17:34I'm not giving you my email. We need you in our system so you can turn around and sell my information. No, thanks
00:17:41It won't let me proceed without an email address. It's all fine. I'll take care of it
00:17:46Okay, we're checked in great
00:17:54When Coleman that's me great Chad will see you at the desk
00:18:01What's up guys, how can we help today we just moved here from the city and I have zero self-service
00:18:05Super bomber. Let's check out your service area. What's your address?
00:18:10Super bomber. Let's check out your service area. What's your address?
00:18:15113 here at Kilroy. Oh
00:18:18Bummer you guys are in the dead zone
00:18:21Just gonna have to get a signal booster. Use your phone as a hotspot. Listen, I have college admissions interviews
00:18:26I have to do there are shows. I want to watch do we have unlimited data? No, you probably got limited unlimited
00:18:32I'm sorry limited unlimited. It's essentially unlimited until you hit the limit. That's when you get limited
00:18:39Why are we paying for unlimited then? Well because it's limited unlimited listen
00:18:44How much for unlimited unlimited? That's the presidential package. That's gonna be
00:18:51$500 a month for the first line $4.99 every line after that. I'm sorry. So we can't afford that
00:18:58Great
00:19:00Thanks Chad, you've been absolutely no help whatsoever. It's okay. We'll figure it out. Come on
00:19:08Hey
00:19:11Doing anything later
00:19:20Spence yo up here. Hey primary delivery perfect timing
00:19:25Hey, man, you wasn't kidding about being on the outside of town
00:19:28No, just the way I like it. Yeah, I dig that man. Oh
00:19:32Oh
00:19:35There you go didn't give me any with something. Oh, yeah, sure. What's up? All right. Yep. There you go
00:19:44Flat out. Yeah
00:19:48Thank you
00:19:52Like I saw on my face
00:19:54No, you know, it's just that usually when people go through a midlife crisis, they you know buy a Corvette
00:20:00So you think this is
00:20:02I'm just saying man. You never used to shut up about leaving now. You bought a house. Well, it's more than just a house
00:20:09It's kind of a long story. Yeah. All right. Well, how about you tell me a long story over that beer?
00:20:15All right, let's do it
00:20:20So we can you see who that is, please
00:20:24It's dad, can you pick it up and put it on speaker? I don't phone mom
00:20:30Hey you hey
00:20:33Bad news. We're outside the service area
00:20:37Starting to see a theme here. How's that? We handling it. My life is a nightmare
00:20:42Well, Kenny stopped by and I owe my beer. So we're gonna go downtown
00:20:45Catch NASA's big announcement. Oh, yeah, you two combined
00:20:50Okay, then we'll just be back at the house. Got it. Well, I won't be long. Love you. I love you back
00:20:56Figures perfect signal in town and the second we get home it's gone
00:21:10Watch this
00:21:18See what I just did
00:21:21You you cross the street. Yeah. Yeah
00:21:26I'm gonna have to wait five minutes at the corner to do it found a parking spot. I made a left. Yeah
00:21:31Nothing stopping me today. We're gonna that bad down there, huh?
00:21:36Yep
00:21:37You know some some people like city life one thing I learned it's not for me
00:21:42People living on top of each other struggling to survive
00:21:46Not doing that I
00:21:48hate man, I've
00:21:49been here forever and
00:21:51Doesn't really seem like I'm missing much in the city, you know
00:21:54It's always there if I want to see it this is a great place to just
00:21:59Live I
00:22:04Think everything's gonna be alright
00:22:06I
00:22:20That's one reason to hate small towns
00:22:23That's the guy that was on my property
00:22:26Really?
00:22:27We might want to keep him off your property
00:22:30What's the backstory there?
00:22:33Well, I'd rather not get into it
00:22:36All right. Well, he's on his end of the bar. We're in ours
00:22:42What'll it be guys? Oh
00:22:44I'll have I'm a gang and then whatever this guy wants
00:22:48Surprise me
00:22:51Any minute now I
00:22:54Wonder where this thing's gonna hit
00:22:56Hopefully somewhere nobody lives
00:22:59like, Idaho
00:23:01In any case, I'm sure we're fine here and on the odds though. Here you go
00:23:07I
00:23:09Thanks for the beer, well, thanks for the primer
00:23:22So so why'd you come back I
00:23:32Was hoping to be a couple beers deep before touching that
00:23:36Well, I'm a very impatient man sir, so, uh, why don't you go ahead and spill it
00:23:46You remember back in middle school my mom died. Yeah, of course
00:23:53Me and my dad we moved down to the city after that
00:23:57Then he had to bust his ass twice as hard just to make ends meet
00:24:00But he did it, you know work the same job for 45 years built up a nice pension
00:24:07And he did a lot of people could say that, you know, yeah
00:24:12Then on that last day he he handed in his hard hat got that first retirement check
00:24:20And as he was driving home
00:24:23he uh
00:24:26He had a heart attack
00:24:28He had a heart attack right behind the wheel
00:24:34Crashed into a light pole
00:24:37He just died at the scene
00:24:40Check uncashed in his pocket
00:24:47And as I was watching him getting lowered into the ground I made a promise I
00:24:52Wasn't gonna go out like that
00:24:55I was gonna find a way
00:24:57to provide for my family and
00:25:00Enjoy what little time I have on this planet not
00:25:04Spend my whole life working
00:25:06Just to die on the day that things finally work out
00:25:13Put a stake in the ground and I'm gonna provide for my family
00:25:20That's what I'm doing here
00:25:25Damn man, I wish I was a couple beers deep. You asked
00:25:42Hold on a second folks. We're getting word from NASA switching you over
00:25:48Gentlemen, thank you for tuning in. We have narrowed down
00:25:55Towards the United States
00:25:57The asteroid is currently on track to collide within 48 hours and the point of impact will be
00:26:05One on to New York, we will have more information as it develops and our thoughts and prayers are with the citizens of one on
00:26:14You have to be shitting me right it's not that hard to pronounce its own Ianta
00:26:24Are you insane? Oh, dude, you understand listen whenever there's a crisis people shop like maniacs
00:26:34Okay, I gotta get back to the store
00:26:36Yeah, I'm a mentor
00:26:38We'll catch up soon. All right, you're taking this extremely well. Oh, no, no, no, it'd be fine
00:26:55I
00:27:02Okay, I'll bite tell me everything not here
00:27:12Can I get a ride no, let's go
00:27:24I
00:27:36Need to get the hell out of dodge
00:27:41Mom
00:27:42What are we gonna do? I don't know but we are on the outskirts of town
00:27:48Maybe it'll hit more towards the center of town. That doesn't matter. It could hit
00:27:52What's the name of that stupid town the one with the Baseball Hall of Fame Cooperstown Cooperstown it could hit Cooperstown and that's still too
00:27:59Close, I'm gonna go try to call your father
00:28:04All right, talk to me I told you they've known where it was going to hit since day one how
00:28:11How did you know that?
00:28:14I've got people
00:28:16God come on. So he is this really a good time to be on your phone. I'm researching
00:28:23Okay, so your people
00:28:25Let's just say they know things before the general public is allowed to
00:28:31Whenever there's chatter about something
00:28:33They hear it a major impact event releases the energy of several million nuclear weapons detonating
00:28:40Simultaneously when an asteroid only a few kilometers in diameter collides with earth
00:28:44That's only if it doesn't burn up in the atmosphere first, right?
00:28:47Yeah
00:28:47But you have the Tunguska event in 1908 where a meteoroid
00:28:52Disintegrated in the atmosphere and the airburst flattened 80 million trees over 800 square miles and killed three people
00:28:59I mean, I do feel bad for the trees, but three people that's really not that bad
00:29:03Only because it detonated over a forest and on a major city
00:29:07800 square miles
00:29:10That's the size of Rhode Island which would mean a million people dead not three good thing we're not in Rhode Island
00:29:16Are you listening to me? Wait a second stop
00:29:21Spooks what the hell they're watching you probably want to see what you do next
00:29:40We have to get out of here
00:29:45Where have you been I know I'm trying to call you this is Wilson Lynn Zoe ma'am younger ma'am
00:29:56Well, it's nice meeting you we need to have a family meeting so tuck you there
00:30:01I
00:30:06Counted three stay or go. Wait, what are we doing?
00:30:09I'm gonna have a vote kind of three stay or go ready one, two, three, so
00:30:16Dad, we have to leave and we had a vote. Look we're staying
00:30:21I'm not running anymore
00:30:24Okay, I ran to the city when mom died ran back here when dad died and I I'm not running anymore
00:30:29I'm standing my ground on this one great speech. I'm sure the asteroid will be very moved Spence. Are you serious? Yes, I'm serious
00:30:37Look, you're my family. I'm going to protect you
00:30:40Okay, we have 48 hours at least this thing can hit on the other side of town for all we know and it's a small
00:30:46asteroid, okay
00:30:48You get one night mom, and then if it gets too close, we're leaving deal
00:30:55Deal
00:30:56Okay, so if we're staying we're gonna need some supplies right even if this asteroid avoids us completely
00:31:03There's gonna be dust and all kinds of things kicked up
00:31:05We need to seal the windows or something get some plastic sheeting and duct tape. Yeah duct tape
00:31:12That's gonna keep an asteroid out. Okay, I'll go get them
00:31:15We'll go get them. We're a family, right?
00:31:19So and I just need to get some things together first
00:31:27Okay, meet me in the SUV
00:31:32We're staying for now
00:31:39People are evacuating currently in droves where they're headed. I don't think they care
00:31:45They're just trying to get out as fast as they can
00:31:50This is crazy
00:31:53Hold on folks breaking news
00:31:56The White House has announced that the president is considering an executive order to remove
00:32:01Oneonta from the United States
00:32:04What?
00:32:10I'm so sorry. Are you okay? I'm so distracted by
00:32:16Well this it's fine. I was too. Oh
00:32:21Mayor Kim Muller
00:32:24You almost killed the mayor no, I'm fine. No, she's fine
00:32:28Spencer Coleman. Oh, you're the Coleman's just moved into the house on Harakil, right? Yeah. How does everybody know that small town?
00:32:37So are you staying or going? Most people seem to have hit the road already just a couple stragglers
00:32:42I need to make sure they're okay
00:32:44Captain goes down with the ship and all that. We're staying for now. Great
00:32:49What we head into town for oh, we're headed over to the hardware store. She's gonna grab some supplies. Oh, you're going to Kenny's
00:32:55Hey while you're there, could you make an announcement? I'm holding a town hall meeting tonight town hall meeting tonight. Got it
00:33:01I'm sure perfect. We're gonna get through this. We need to stick together and keep this town safe
00:33:07Until we can't anymore
00:33:08All right
00:33:10Thank You Coleman's and tell Kenny I said hi
00:33:15Nice to meet you
00:33:18Yeah, she's nice
00:33:27In and out guys
00:33:33Should we come back later
00:33:36Reports on panic shoppers at the hardware store buying up everything in sight
00:33:42Telling us to warn all of you just stay in your homes. It's the safest place right now
00:33:48Okay, just grab everything
00:33:50Spence hey Kenny Kenny. Hey, hey, buddy. There's a lie
00:33:56Mayor asked me to have you make an announcement. Oh Kim. Yeah anything for her. What's up?
00:34:00Okay town hall meeting tonight. Anyone left in town should be there. Yeah, we got like
00:34:0530 bucks for the stuff. So just people. Oh, perfect, man. Appreciate that. Are you gonna introduce us? Oh
00:34:12This is my wife Lynn my daughter Zoe pleasure to meet you both lovely story. You've got here. Thank you. Thank you. Great
00:34:19Okay. See you later. Copy that
00:34:22Attention shoppers, there's an announcement
00:34:36Oh
00:34:39Yeah, oh
00:34:45Everyone settle down
00:34:46Settle down. Thank you all for coming here at such short notice as you are all undoubtedly aware a large amount of people have already
00:34:53evacuated
00:34:55But you're here and I'm here with you. I
00:34:59Would like to figure out what's kept some of you behind
00:35:01Yes, how about you who me
00:35:03Sick grandma. Yeah, I just figured the government would step in and like send a rocket up into space and blow up the asteroid
00:35:09Well, you might have heard that there is a possibility that we will be removed from the United States. So
00:35:15We are on our own. So I guess we're on our own Ianta
00:35:23What's the plan mayor well
00:35:24I have a now plan and a later plan
00:35:26I have a now plan and a later plan. The now plan is that we look out for each other
00:35:32We're a small town, but there's bound to be people taking advantage of the situation
00:35:38specifically
00:35:39Empty houses filled with valuables. Now if you haven't already you may want to consider boarding up your windows
00:35:45I saw some folks doing that on the way over. What's the point of boarding up houses when they're gonna be destroyed?
00:35:50Anyhow, well that takes me to the later plan. I recommend gathering up anything valuable
00:35:56Irreplaceable and storing it outside of town as the asteroid approaches
00:36:00It has been determined that the safest place for us is secret caverns
00:36:03It is far enough and deep enough and we have a bus that could help get this done faster
00:36:09All right. I will open up the floor at any questions
00:36:14This is madness
00:36:16Yes. Yep. How do we know the asteroids even real? I have it on good authority that this is real
00:36:23Okay, the government really abandoned us at this time back, where are you going? Yes, they can and they have
00:36:32You hear all that I heard a lot of yapping without much thinking you got something better
00:36:44Hey, man, sorry, I'm late place was jam-packed and I had to count all the money
00:36:49Wilson
00:36:51Minnie Munson
00:36:53Wilson's got a plan. Oh, yeah, something like your last plan
00:36:58Listen man, if your plan a involves him I start working on plan B
00:37:04Well, I'll plan see you later
00:37:09Okay
00:37:10Talk to me
00:37:12I'm expecting a communication at my secure facility in the next hour
00:37:16You should be there
00:37:19Okay, meet me outside
00:37:27What's going on
00:37:30Wilson's got a plan the crazy neighbor. We really don't have many options. We have one option we can leave
00:37:38so we
00:37:40Look you gave me until tomorrow
00:37:42And I know this is gonna sound weird, but we're supposed to get some kind of message tonight
00:37:48Okay, there's something going on and I have to get to the bottom of it. I don't like it Spence
00:37:52We're already running out of time
00:37:56Tomorrow okay promise
00:37:59Okay, fine see you back at the house
00:38:13Let's see the secure facility
00:38:27So this is it, huh
00:38:30What?
00:38:32This isn't secure enough for you
00:38:35Is that a serious question?
00:38:37Why so tense Spence, how do you know we could trust these people Wilson any minute now?
00:38:52Bingo
00:39:07A gravity device
00:39:09That's what it says
00:39:23We've had people from Oneonta in a mass exodus from the city of Oneonta to escape the
00:39:30Asteroid and the aftermath
00:39:32Evacuating now apparently to secret caverns just outside of Cobleskill
00:39:38A safe haven away from all of the dust and destruction
00:39:47Okay, we are asteroid proof
00:39:52Did you gain any game-changing information from that top secret message?
00:39:58Well, I have a meeting tonight
00:40:01Guys!
00:40:07The exact coordinates of the asteroid impact
00:40:1042.495821
00:40:14And negative 75.076065
00:40:19Wait, what was that second one?
00:40:21Again that is 42.495821
00:40:27And negative 75.076065
00:40:32Come on, piece of shit
00:40:34Zoe, language
00:40:36It's the house
00:40:38What?
00:40:40What?
00:40:41The coordinates put the exact impact point at 113 Herrick Hill Road, Oneonta, New York
00:40:48Our thoughts and prayers are with you
00:40:53Spence?
00:40:56How?
00:40:57I guess the crazy neighbor ain't so crazy after all
00:41:00You knew this entire time?
00:41:02No, no, I mean, well, Wilson, he told me but I didn't believe him
00:41:06Why didn't you say anything?
00:41:08Because I thought he was crazy, I didn't know there was something to tell you
00:41:11We are leaving now
00:41:13No, no, this doesn't make any sense
00:41:16Dad, the only thing that makes sense is that we leave
00:41:19There's something else going on here, like, Wilson, how did he know that it was going to be this place?
00:41:23Like, specifically, how did he know that it was this?
00:41:26He's a psycho, dad, even a broken clock is right twice a day
00:41:30I'm packing a bag
00:41:32Make that two
00:41:34Spencer?
00:41:36Spencer, look at me
00:41:38We have to go, now
00:41:41I can't
00:41:43I have a meeting
00:41:45You keep talking about this meeting, what is going on?
00:41:50What? Tell me, what?
00:41:53A...
00:41:56It's a gravity device
00:42:02Please repeat that
00:42:06A gravity device
00:42:08Mom, we're leaving!
00:42:13No, no
00:42:17Zoey, Lynn, would you, please?
00:42:20Spencer, I told you, if this thing gets too close and you don't have a solution, we're leaving
00:42:24Do you have a solution?
00:42:26Yes!
00:42:27No, you don't!
00:42:28Mom, come on!
00:42:30Can you just trust me here and stay?
00:42:33Spencer, I love you, but I have to do what's right here
00:42:37I'm taking our daughter and I'm leaving
00:42:41Please stay
00:42:42I spoke with our brokers in the city
00:42:44The buyers haven't closed on our place, so that's where you can find us
00:42:48Guys...
00:42:49Dad, you know you're wrong
00:42:52Be safe
00:42:57Hey man, I'll call you as soon as...
00:42:59Hey Kenny, ask him about his plan!
00:43:04Where are they going?
00:43:07What's the plan, Spencer?
00:43:11Gravity device
00:43:13What?
00:43:14No wonder they're leaving
00:43:16Are you still stepping into Wilson's bullshit?
00:43:18Look, I know this sounds absurd, okay?
00:43:20But Wilson knew that the asteroid was going to hit Oneonta
00:43:23And specifically he knew it was going to hit my house
00:43:25Spencer, how could he possibly have known that?
00:43:27I don't know!
00:43:29But look, whatever beef you have with him
00:43:31Can you just please put it aside until we can figure out what the hell is going on?
00:43:34Oh, no, no, hell no, fat chance
00:43:37Now what?
00:43:40No, stop!
00:43:42Do not...
00:43:43Do not come up my driveway!
00:43:44Stop right there!
00:43:49Hey, are you Stuart Coleman?
00:43:51Who's asking?
00:43:52I'm just here to report the news
00:43:54Don't shoot the messenger
00:43:55Vulture
00:44:00Shit, there's no signal
00:44:04A satellite?
00:44:06Hey, uh...
00:44:07You seem to be having a little trouble with our satellite
00:44:09Would you mind if maybe we borrow some internet off of you?
00:44:11No! No internet!
00:44:13Really? Not even a little?
00:44:14No!
00:44:15Thirty thousand dollars if you want to run a line to my house
00:44:17Go for it!
00:44:22Dumb
00:44:26Can't wait till this place goes up in smoke
00:44:33Sorry about your house
00:44:44Hey!
00:44:45Hey...
00:44:46Who...
00:44:47Who...
00:44:48Who do you work for?
00:44:50We don't work for anyone you need to know about, Mr. Coleman
00:44:52Knock it off
00:44:53Okay, so you creeps know my name, how about you return the favor?
00:44:56Fair enough
00:44:57I'm Agent Thompson, this is Agent Thompson
00:44:59Thompson with a P
00:45:01That's cute
00:45:03It's come to our attention that you have plans tonight
00:45:05To meet with a rogue organization in order to gain possession of equipment
00:45:08Equipment that doesn't even exist
00:45:10Knock it off
00:45:12Okay, and?
00:45:14Just be very careful how you proceed
00:45:16You're toying with powers a lot bigger than yourself
00:45:18Great, noted
00:45:20Now I have bigger things to deal with, so please, get off my prop!
00:45:24Property
00:45:29A little too close
00:45:30That's right
00:45:31The line's actually...
00:45:32No, it's there
00:45:33It's... it's actually right here
00:45:35It's... it's actually right here
00:45:37It's... it's actually right here
00:45:39It's actually right here
00:45:40No, it's there
00:45:41I see
00:45:42Get off my prop!
00:45:43If you ask me, it's... well...
00:45:45Have a nice day, gentlemen
00:45:49Let's get out of here
00:45:59Dude, you have had one hell of a morning
00:46:04Listen, Spencer, I think it's...
00:46:06I think it's time to cut your losses, man
00:46:09What's left to lose?
00:46:11My family already left me
00:46:13We got reporters showing up
00:46:15Agents walking through my bushes
00:46:16And an asteroid is about to hit my house
00:46:23Why don't you just tell me what's up with you and Wilson?
00:46:27No, no, it's not important right now
00:46:28No, I saw how you were staring at him at the bar
00:46:32Spill it
00:46:40All right, all right, listen
00:46:44He sold my dad a majority stake in a mining company
00:46:47Put his entire life savings in
00:46:49So he can have exclusive rights to this new mineral
00:46:52Or something that's buried underneath Oneonta
00:46:56Only problem is, there's all these houses in the way
00:47:01So on the outside of town
00:47:02There's a warehouse full of mining equipment
00:47:05That can't mine
00:47:08Yeah, I guess I could understand why you're pretty pissed off
00:47:12Yeah
00:47:14Does that mean you're not coming to the meeting tonight?
00:47:17What, the top secret gravity device meeting?
00:47:21Look, man, I know it sounds absurd
00:47:24But I can really use you there
00:47:32All right, listen, I'll be there, okay?
00:47:34But only to watch Wilson fail, all right?
00:47:37And to watch your back, because that's what friends do
00:47:41Yeah, I guess we are friends, aren't we?
00:47:45Were we not?
00:47:57I don't understand why we all had to cram into your van to come here
00:48:01The fewer vehicles, the better
00:48:04Makes for a quick getaway
00:48:07You expecting the need for a quick getaway?
00:48:10Is there a different kind of getaway?
00:48:14I know I'm going to regret asking this, but...
00:48:18Wilson, why am I sitting on a damn toilet?
00:48:22Clearly, you have never been on a stakeout
00:48:25You saying this thing works?
00:48:27Give it a try
00:48:35They're here
00:48:41I'll be back
00:48:43Don't play with anything
00:48:45I gave you something to play with
00:48:57What are they saying?
00:48:59I don't know
00:49:00Probably something stupid
00:49:05I'm starving, is there anything to eat in here?
00:49:18Good thing I'm not a diabetic, huh?
00:49:21Want some?
00:49:34I don't know
00:49:39What's wrong with you? Where's the device?
00:49:42Oh, they don't have it
00:49:45I'm sorry, what?
00:49:46I told you
00:49:49What are we doing here then?
00:49:52They said we already have it
00:49:54Somewhere here in Oneonta
00:49:57Probably on your property
00:49:59No, that doesn't make any sense
00:50:01How could it possibly be in Oneonta on my property?
00:50:03I'm just saying what they told...
00:50:07Don't tell me you ate those
00:50:10What?
00:50:12How many?
00:50:14Why?
00:50:17That's my concert stash
00:50:20Like in your munchies stash?
00:50:23No
00:50:25Like when I want my own private light show stash
00:50:29Each one of those has a drop of white fluff
00:50:35LSD
00:50:37Acid
00:50:39Wilson, stop playing man, that's not funny
00:50:41Yeah, it's not funny
00:50:42Those things aren't cheap
00:50:43Man, let me get this straight man
00:50:44So if me and Spence each had ten Sour Patch Kids
00:50:47You saying that's ten hits of acid?
00:50:49Yes sir
00:50:50And at market rates, you each owe me a hundred bucks
00:50:54Oh yeah, I bet
00:50:55How about you just take it out of what you owe my dad?
00:50:57You might want to check that rate
00:51:01You're in for a bad night
00:51:04Oh my god
00:51:07How about that quick getaway, go
00:51:09Go Wilson, go
00:51:11All right, everyone out of the van
00:51:15God damn it, every time
00:51:23You ever think about putting some seatbelts on this damn thing?
00:51:26In what scenario do you see me driving this van
00:51:29While sitting on a toilet?
00:51:33Spence, Spence
00:51:35Man, you feeling something?
00:51:36Yeah
00:51:37Why is it kicking in so fast?
00:51:39Probably from all the adrenaline coursing through your veins
00:51:43Oh my god
00:51:45Oh no
00:51:46Get him, you know
00:51:49Get him
00:51:54Okay, this isn't happening man, this is
00:51:56This isn't happening
00:51:57No
00:52:01I'm gonna move
00:52:10Come on Spence, just shut up, just shut up, shut up
00:52:14Do you have a solution?
00:52:15Do you have a solution?
00:52:16No, you don't, you don't
00:52:18Please repeat that
00:52:25I just wanted to, I just wanted to go away
00:52:38How did you do that?
00:52:39You remember things as being that strong?
00:52:46No
00:53:00Hey, so, so
00:53:02So where's this stupid asteroid anyway?
00:53:06You think he'd be lighting up the sky by now?
00:53:10Oh, you don't see an asteroid
00:53:13Until it's too late
00:53:16You're thinking about comets
00:53:19What about
00:53:23Shooting stars?
00:53:25Those are technically
00:53:28Meteors
00:53:31Unless they survive the atmosphere
00:53:33Then they're meteorites
00:53:37How do you have all this memorized?
00:53:40How do you not?
00:53:43I don't know
00:53:45I guess I
00:53:48I guess I fell asleep during the New Year class
00:53:51It's the universe
00:53:55The one thing
00:53:57Everybody should understand
00:54:01And I think I avoid it because
00:54:04It makes me feel uncomfortable
00:54:06Spence makes you feel uncomfortable, Kenny?
00:54:09No, no, no, no, no, no, like
00:54:12Realizing how small I am
00:54:15You know, that, that makes me uncomfortable
00:54:18You shouldn't feel uncomfortable
00:54:20Just because you're short
00:54:22Shut up, Dickhead
00:54:24I mean, I mean, I mean, think about it, guys
00:54:25Like, seriously
00:54:26Somewhere out there in space
00:54:29You know, far away
00:54:32It's this big-ass piece of rock
00:54:38That we can't even see
00:54:41It's a short period of time away from potentially
00:54:45Killing us all
00:54:48I mean, if that, if that doesn't
00:54:51If that doesn't tell you how fragile everything is
00:54:55I don't know what does
00:54:57I would find that liberating
00:55:01But, but, but who's gonna remember me, you know?
00:55:04I hear you're being pretty hard on yourself there
00:55:07Kenny
00:55:08Mamma?
00:55:12I don't have any kids
00:55:14I don't have a family
00:55:18I just got a hardware store
00:55:20And that's
00:55:23That's not much of a legacy
00:55:25If it makes you feel any better
00:55:29In the end
00:55:31Nothing anybody does matters
00:55:34We're all just
00:55:37Killing time until the sun eats us
00:55:47Well, gentlemen
00:55:50I'm going to preambulate
00:55:53Back to my domicile
00:55:55Slap on some Floyd and
00:55:58Pack the rest of my necessities
00:56:00Oh, and Kenny
00:56:05Good job tonight
00:56:08Whatever you did
00:56:15Bullseye
00:56:17Shut up, man
00:56:18I'm still mad at you
00:56:20I know
00:56:23Ciao, Bambino's
00:56:26Ciao, Bambino's
00:56:31I think I might as well go ahead and head on to
00:56:33Home, myself
00:56:35Yeah, head home
00:56:37It's a couple of miles back to town
00:56:39Nah, it'll be alright
00:56:42Figure I could use the walk
00:56:47Alright
00:56:49Ciao for now
00:56:51Mmm
00:56:59Mmm
00:57:02Oh, feels so good
00:57:13Oh
00:57:17What happened?
00:57:21Mmm
00:57:43Oh, hey Mr. Coleman
00:57:45Hey, it's um
00:57:48Milton, right?
00:57:49That's right, great news
00:57:51What great news can you possibly have for me?
00:57:53Well, the news pitched in the 30k
00:57:55To run a line to your house
00:57:57Isn't that great?
00:57:58It's great
00:57:59But I'm not going to need internet
00:58:01Anymore, that one
00:58:03Oh, it's not for you
00:58:05It's so they could broadcast the destruction of your house
00:58:09How would they do that?
00:58:10They said the advertising revenue alone makes it worth it
00:58:13Oh, hey, did you hear
00:58:20Not again
00:58:28Hi, Mr. Coleman
00:58:31Guess we're living in our own country now, huh?
00:58:33Maybe you could run for president when this is all over
00:58:35What the hell are you talking about?
00:58:38It's too bad about your house
00:58:40But we'd really like to get an interview if you don't mind
00:58:45Alright, if I don't mind
00:58:47You know what?
00:58:48Oh my god
00:58:49Mom!
00:58:51Mom!
00:58:52What?
00:58:53We are live with Spencer Coleman
00:58:54Whose house is doomed to be vaporized by an asteroid
00:58:57Mr. Coleman, how are you feeling?
00:58:59How the fuck do you think I'm feeling?
00:59:01Next question!
00:59:02Sir
00:59:03I didn't think he'd actually stay
00:59:05I thought it was a bluff
00:59:07You may have been bluffing a little bit too
00:59:09You know what the funny part is?
00:59:11Huh?
00:59:12None of this matters
00:59:14Everything that we're doing, it doesn't matter
00:59:16Nobody is going to remember you or you
00:59:18And nobody is going to remember me
00:59:20No!
00:59:21Everything we're doing is pointless
00:59:24We're just killing time until the sun hits us
00:59:27We got the shot, let's go, let's go
00:59:29Get off
00:59:30Off my property
00:59:33Oh, I can see it now
00:59:35Crazy man yells at news crew
00:59:39We have to get him out of there
00:59:42Yeah, let's go, come on
00:59:46Get off
00:59:55Here, Mr. Coleman
00:59:57The first month is free
00:59:58Although I suppose your first month will be your only month
01:00:01Sorry
01:00:02Thank you, Milton
01:00:04Now, can you please get off my...
01:00:05Get off your property
01:00:06On it
01:00:07You know, I'm leaving town
01:00:08So, it was nice knowing...
01:00:10Meeting you
01:00:11Yeah, uh, bye
01:00:17Sorry about your house
01:00:23Poison!
01:00:25Poison!
01:00:26We're just killing time until the sun hits us
01:00:29Poison!
01:00:30Jesus
01:00:31What?
01:00:33Dad's gone viral
01:00:35Is that good?
01:00:37Going viral is great
01:00:38For everyone except the person going viral
01:00:47Spence, hey, hey man
01:00:49You okay?
01:00:51Top of the world, Kenny
01:00:53Couldn't be better
01:00:56Why do you ask?
01:00:58You're, uh...
01:01:00You're kind of famous
01:01:05What even happened last night?
01:01:09How did we get out of the...
01:01:12Car chase and...
01:01:13You haven't heard, have you?
01:01:14It's official
01:01:16Oneyana has been removed from the United States
01:01:19Yeah
01:01:20We have a president that would rather ignore the whole situation than deal with it
01:01:24So, as a result
01:01:26We're our own country now
01:01:29Yeah
01:01:31I guess the spooks were out of their jurisdiction and had to turn back
01:01:36Meanwhile
01:01:37Kim's evacuating everyone that's left in town to the caverns
01:01:40So, I guess we're safe
01:01:43Look
01:01:45Spence, man
01:01:47I think you put up a good fight
01:01:48And did everything you can
01:01:50Even including trusting your crazy neighbor on a slight chance that he was right
01:01:55But, dude, he was wrong
01:01:58You have a family, man
01:01:59And that's way more important than a house full of stuff
01:02:02He figures
01:02:04When we move out
01:02:05We'll have a place to call home
01:02:08And we'll have a place to call home
01:02:10He figures
01:02:12And we move everything up here just to have it destroyed, you know?
01:02:15You ever seen a hearse with a trailer hitch attached to it?
01:02:18It's just stuff, man
01:02:21And as for the house
01:02:23It's nowhere near as important as the people inside of it
01:02:27Hey
01:02:28I'll see you at the caverns
01:02:31Yeah
01:02:33I just have to say goodbye first
01:02:37And I don't know what to take from the house
01:02:39How about you just
01:02:41Grab one thing that's irreplaceable
01:02:44Irreplaceable
01:02:51Want some internet?
01:02:57Extending Wi-Fi
01:02:59I'll be there
01:03:09I'll be there
01:03:34With the asteroid impact imminent
01:03:36We will be off the air until further notice
01:03:38Be safe, everyone
01:03:40This is Leslie Anne
01:03:41Signing off
01:03:42Signing off
01:03:43Signing off
01:03:44Signing off
01:04:07Dad?
01:04:10You came back
01:04:12We did
01:04:17I take it you saw him
01:04:18Yeah, we did
01:04:21It's time to go, Spencer
01:04:36It's gonna be okay
01:05:07Come on, everybody
01:05:08File inside in an orderly manner, please
01:05:12Come on
01:05:15There we go
01:05:18All right
01:05:19Good
01:05:36All right
01:06:07Are you sure we're gonna be safe down here?
01:06:10Seems like people are getting a little restless
01:06:12You wanna give a tour or something?
01:06:13Okay, sure
01:06:14I'm getting pretty restless myself, so
01:06:16Folks, welcome to secret caverns
01:06:19A hundred feet below the surface
01:06:21Now, if you'll follow me down the petrified escalator
01:06:26Hey, is there any Wi-Fi I can hop on down here?
01:06:29Hey, Chad, right?
01:06:31Mrs. Coleman
01:06:32Hey, did you guys ever get any internet?
01:06:34We did, yeah
01:06:35Just in time for an asteroid to hit our house
01:06:38Figures, right?
01:06:39Classic
01:06:41Hey, did you see that crazy man on the news today?
01:06:43Yeah, I did
01:06:44Actually, that's my husband
01:06:46Spencer!
01:06:47Holy shit, it's you!
01:06:49Hey, can I get a selfie?
01:06:50You're famous, Chad
01:06:52Or, like, even a video would be awesome
01:06:54Is that okay?
01:06:56Yeah, sure, whatever
01:07:00We're just killing time until the sun eats us all
01:07:05I feel like I'm married to a celebrity
01:07:07Thanks, man, this is gonna get so many likes
01:07:10It's weird that you guys don't have service up there, though
01:07:12Because they put a tower up there real recently
01:07:15This is awesome, I'm gonna go post this
01:07:17Thank you so much, man
01:07:23Is that what you need?
01:07:24God, Mom, stop
01:07:27Yeah, I'm just gonna hang back and wait for Chad
01:07:29The caverns began forming approximately six million years ago
01:07:33Long before the woolly mammoth, but long after the dinosaurs
01:07:37The caverns were discovered in 1928
01:07:39When two bovine explorers fell through the ground
01:07:42Bovine explorers?
01:07:44Cows
01:07:46Apart from the stalactites and the stalagmites
01:07:49What's on your mind, Spence?
01:07:52How's there no cell service when they just built a brand new tower?
01:07:56Maybe it's not activated yet
01:07:59Maybe
01:08:00The caverns' mining rough will reveal garnets, rose quartz, fool's gold
01:08:05Emeralds, aquamarines and more
01:08:08Maybe, maybe I am just a crazy old man
01:08:12And it's a downward spiral from here
01:08:15I'll be standing on the corner of my bathrobe
01:08:17Flashing all the ladies in my mind
01:08:21I like your bathrobe, though
01:08:23I'm changing my last name
01:08:26In fact, if some of you remember
01:08:27A few decades ago, a group of geologists discovered a vast deposit of rare minerals underneath Oneonta
01:08:34The potential dollar value was so high that it could not be calculated
01:08:39Why didn't they just dig for it?
01:08:41I'm sure they would have loved to
01:08:42The only problem is there's all these houses in the way
01:08:45What was that?
01:08:47You can't dig for precious metals if everyone's living on top of it
01:08:50What?
01:08:56I gotta go
01:08:58What? Where?
01:09:01I just have to make sure I'm not crazy
01:09:02You are, absolutely
01:09:04Spencer, we came all the way back here to make sure you were safe
01:09:06And now you're just gonna leave us again?
01:09:08Just stay here, okay? I'll be fast
01:09:10I think I can save the house
01:09:12Just wait for me right here
01:09:16You go after him
01:09:17Dad!
01:09:21Kenny, do you have bolt cutters?
01:09:24Uh, yeah
01:09:25Meet me in the truck
01:09:27Oh, we're leaving right now?
01:09:32Zoe, what are you doing?
01:09:33You don't have time
01:09:34Zoe, you have to trust me on this
01:09:36It's gonna eat away at me forever if I don't try
01:09:38You know what really eats away at someone? An asteroid
01:09:43I'll be back
01:09:45I promise
01:09:47I promise
01:09:49Ever since we got here, it's like all you care about is this house
01:09:52It's like Mom and I don't even exist
01:09:55It's kind of turned you into an asshole
01:10:00Zoe
01:10:09I love you
01:10:12Hey, bolt cutter delivery
01:10:14But why?
01:10:15Let's go
01:10:30What are you two scurrying off to?
01:10:41Man, so many lights
01:10:45Oh, great
01:10:47Battery's almost dead
01:10:48You get the Pro or the Pro Max?
01:10:50The Pro, why?
01:10:51The Pro sucks
01:10:52What? You suck
01:10:53Max is 3% more battery life
01:10:55Wow, a whole 3%?
01:10:57Well, 3% would come in pretty handy right about now, wouldn't it?
01:11:04Thanks for watching
01:11:07Where are we going, Spence?
01:11:08Cell phone tower
01:11:09Care to elaborate?
01:11:11Because this isn't normal
01:11:12None of this is normal my entire life
01:11:14It hasn't been normal since I moved here
01:11:16And the only thing I can think to fix this crazy problem is this crazy solution
01:11:21Cell phone tower
01:11:22Why am I not hearing any of this?
01:11:25Oh, I'll be damned
01:11:26The person who knows everything doesn't know what's going on right now
01:11:29Maybe it's because your ears are a lot closer to the ground than mine are
01:11:33Whatever, look, as long as we're back in time, okay?
01:11:36You know, uh, asteroids?
01:11:38Yeah
01:11:39We'll make it
01:11:41This is News Channel One reporting from the U.S. Oneonta border
01:11:44We are only a short time away from impact
01:11:46As you can see behind me, people are still scrambling to evacuate
01:11:50We'll be setting up our remote cameras and then moving off to a safe distance
01:11:54We'll talk to you soon
01:11:56You sure you set this up with enough headroom, right?
01:11:58I mean, you realize we're talking an asteroid
01:12:00Boom! Big mushroom cloud
01:12:05Hey, wasn't that...
01:12:07Hey, saw your family pass a few minutes ago
01:12:10Oh, no, I don't have a family
01:12:12No, I just have two people who do whatever the hell they want
01:12:15And we just happen to live in the same house
01:12:17Well, we did live in the same house until it was too, you know, get blown up by an asteroid
01:12:21It's okay, Lynn, it's okay
01:12:23No, it's not, it's not okay
01:12:24I have totally lost control
01:12:26I have completely lost control
01:12:28I've just been trying to optimism my way through this whole thing
01:12:31And it has finally caught up to me
01:12:34Mayor, I just, I just wanted a garden
01:12:41Are you, are you okay?
01:12:43You seem like you might be a little claustrophobic
01:12:47No, I'm definitely claustrophobic
01:12:55Alright, now what?
01:12:58I have no idea
01:13:00Just looks like it doesn't belong
01:13:03I don't know, looks like it belongs to me
01:13:05Technically speaking, something that doesn't belong would want to look like it does belong
01:13:10Okay, well, how about you guys stop saying the word belong and help me out here
01:13:16No service
01:13:20Yeah, I got nothing either
01:13:22Wilson?
01:13:23I don't carry one of those things around
01:13:25Are you nuts?
01:13:28So we got a brand new cell tower
01:13:30No cell service
01:13:32And a gigantic mineral deposit underneath Oneonta
01:13:36Oh, and an asteroid coming
01:13:38Haha, soon! Asteroid coming soon
01:13:42What's the missing piece here?
01:13:44Well, did they give you a timeline of how long we would be down here?
01:13:49No, no
01:13:52I'm kind of winging it at this point, if I'm being honest
01:13:55I'm sorry, pressure of a family is a lot
01:13:58But I can't imagine the pressure of an entire town, especially in this situation
01:14:03How are you doing this?
01:14:05I drink a lot of wine
01:14:08Did you bring any?
01:14:10No, no, I should have though
01:14:16Hey, maybe they have some upstairs
01:14:20Alright Wilson, you've had your ear to the ground this whole time, what do you think?
01:14:25Alright, spitballing here
01:14:30I would imagine that the electronic interference you've been experiencing on your property
01:14:34Is the direct by-product of the mineral deposit discovered decades ago in Oneonta
01:14:39And my readings seem to indicate that your house, if you'll excuse the expression
01:14:46Is ground zero
01:14:49Somebody somewhere wants to get underneath your land
01:14:54And they found the perfect cover to do it under
01:14:57So damn, so this is the gravity device?
01:15:00Something like that
01:15:02The asteroid probably shares some property with the mineral, so it's more like a magnet
01:15:09Well, whatever it is, we've got to get inside and take a closer look at this thing
01:15:14Kenny
01:15:16If this thing is the culprit, we should be able to just cut the power and the asteroid will go off course
01:15:21Well, whatever it takes, if it means saving the house
01:15:26Wait, wait, wait, wait, Spence, hold on, hold on, wait a minute
01:15:29Are we here to save your house or to save the town?
01:15:35You said the house
01:15:39I did?
01:15:40Yeah man, but what about my house?
01:15:45What about Dickhead's house?
01:15:47What about my store?
01:15:52Shit
01:15:59Shit
01:16:01Sorry
01:16:03More importantly, have you thought about what happens if you do kill the power?
01:16:16What is this? Casual Friday?
01:16:19We're off the clock
01:16:21This is civilian conversation
01:16:24Oh, I see what you're doing here, it's that reverse psychology
01:16:27Just regular psychology, Mr. Coleman
01:16:29What happens if you do manage to knock the asteroid off its course?
01:16:32I don't know
01:16:34Maybe it flies past Earth and hits Uranus
01:16:38You do realize it's a little too late for that, right?
01:16:40All you're going to do is take out another town or another city that hasn't been preparing for this
01:16:47You're one stubborn son of a bitch, Mr. Coleman
01:16:49Seems like no matter how hard they tried to scare you off, you just stayed behind
01:16:54And that everyone was supposed to just leave town, make things easy
01:16:57Guys, we should probably be going
01:17:00Wait, what are you implying?
01:17:01You still haven't figured it out, huh?
01:17:03I think you're going to find that when all is said and done, you'll be in a much better position than you realize
01:17:08Oh yeah
01:17:10Chopper's waiting
01:17:12Forward to negotiating
01:17:20She was right
01:17:22Who?
01:17:24Zoe
01:17:26I've been an asshole
01:17:28Well, maybe
01:17:31But maybe this is a situation where everyone's an asshole
01:17:35Yeah, but at least you're about to be rich assholes
01:17:39What do you mean by that?
01:17:41The minerals underneath your house
01:17:44I assume that's why you bought it in the first place
01:17:47Oh my god
01:17:49Guys, the whole reason that the mining company was a bust in the first place was because all the houses were in the way
01:17:56And now there won't be any houses
01:17:58And we're in our own country now
01:18:00Which means the government can't come in and claim eminent domain
01:18:04And Kenny
01:18:06You own the only business with the ability to clean up the mess and get that shit out of the ground once the dust settles
01:18:12So
01:18:14You're welcome
01:18:26Um, guys
01:18:29Astro
01:18:32Thought you knew where you were going, genius
01:18:34I do know where we're going, it's just
01:18:36I must have taken a wrong turn somewhere up here
01:18:38I'm just trying to figure it out on the maps
01:18:40Which, unfortunately, I don't have any service
01:18:42So, give me a second
01:18:44So you don't know where you're going?
01:18:46I know exactly where we're going
01:18:47We're going to the caverns, it's a few minutes away
01:18:49I just took a wrong turn somewhere
01:18:51Listen, Christopher Columbus
01:18:53At this rate, you're not gonna get us anywhere
01:18:55Hey, is that crazy, Coleman?
01:18:57Come on, we gotta stop him
01:18:59Hey, stop
01:19:01Stop
01:19:03In the name of the first amendment
01:19:05Come on, get over here
01:19:09Are you guys insane?
01:19:11There's an asteroid coming
01:19:13We're just minutes away from impact
01:19:15And we are here live with Mr. Coleman
01:19:17Mr. Coleman
01:19:19You've become quite a celebrity since the last time we saw you
01:19:21Do you have any comments for us?
01:19:23Yeah, yeah, I have some comments
01:19:25For you
01:19:27Yeah
01:19:30So I guess your job is about to get a whole lot more complicated, huh?
01:19:35Why's that?
01:19:37The whole being removed from the United States thing
01:19:40What does that even mean?
01:19:42Are we the country of Oneonta now?
01:19:44I'm not sure
01:19:46It's not like I got a call from the United Nations or anything
01:19:49We'll just have to figure that out after the dust settles, I guess
01:19:53What do you call the mayor of a country?
01:19:55Mr. Coleman
01:19:57Wait, isn't that your husband again?
01:19:59Do you have any comments for us?
01:20:01Yeah, yeah, I have some comments
01:20:03For you
01:20:05Yeah
01:20:09I was wrong
01:20:13Could you just repeat that?
01:20:17I said
01:20:19I was wrong
01:20:21Your dad's in the news again
01:20:23I moved my family up here
01:20:25I had a simple life
01:20:27And it backfired
01:20:29And they think I'm an absolute lunatic
01:20:33And they're right
01:20:35Yeah
01:20:37Um, Lynn
01:20:39Joey
01:20:41I hope you're watching
01:20:43I love you so much
01:20:45I'm so, so sorry
01:20:49I was so focused on
01:20:53The stupid house
01:20:55I forgot about the people inside
01:20:59So
01:21:01Go ahead
01:21:03Take my house
01:21:05Wipe it off the face of the planet
01:21:07If it takes an asteroid to
01:21:09Destroy everything
01:21:11To make things right
01:21:13So be it
01:21:15I don't know what's gonna happen
01:21:17When this thing hits
01:21:19It doesn't matter
01:21:21Because I think we're gonna be alright
01:21:23Because
01:21:25We'll rebuild
01:21:27And we're not gonna rebuild
01:21:29The way things were
01:21:31We're gonna build something better
01:21:33Together
01:21:35Oh
01:21:37If you'll excuse me
01:21:39I have a family to get back to
01:21:45Oh, uh, sorry about the
01:21:47Shoe in the truck
01:21:49Yeah
01:21:53And there you have it, folks
01:21:57Let's get the hell out of here
01:21:59Man, your dad is so cool
01:22:01Really? You think so?
01:22:03Yeah, I mean, look at him
01:22:05He's clearly not afraid to say what's on his mind
01:22:07And he looks like he cares a lot about you and your mom
01:22:09I guess
01:22:11I don't know, to me he's just
01:22:13Always been dad
01:22:15Here's the thing about parents, though
01:22:17It's like, you get 30, maybe 40 years
01:22:19With them if you're lucky
01:22:21You spend the first 10 just crawling around
01:22:23Not knowing what's going on
01:22:25Then the next 10 you hate their guts
01:22:27Then, I don't know, I think you just spend
01:22:29The rest of the time you have with them
01:22:31Just trying to make up for it
01:22:33So you're gonna let your dad get along?
01:22:35No, my dad's a moron
01:22:37But we're working on it
01:22:47Zoe!
01:23:01Zoe!
01:23:05Lynn!
01:23:07Hey
01:23:09You made it back
01:23:11You know what's gonna make
01:23:13A speech
01:23:15High five
01:23:17Don't make it weird, dad
01:23:25So
01:23:27This is it?
01:23:29This is it
01:23:31I'm sorry
01:23:33I didn't know we were doing a thing
01:23:37Let's go inside
01:23:45Let's go
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