A collection of our favourite moments from the classic show - enjoy!
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If you have any favourite clips from the show, let us know and we'll upload them!
All copyrights belong to the BBC.
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FunTranscript
00:00I didn't know you bet on the horses Polly. oh I don't. only I was in the town and I'd
00:05passed the betting shop and I thought well why not? well why not indeed eh?
00:08jolly good question Ada. pity you didn't let me put something on really. realize
00:11how much we would have won? 75 pounds for a five pound stake? still you know best.
00:18those were the odds were they Basil? yes that's right dear. 14 to 1. I listened in
00:22on the wireless just to make sure it had triumphed. enjoy your winnings Polly.
00:25thank you. Polly. yes mrs. Fulton. what was the name of the horse? the name?
00:34I've gone blank
00:37bird brain. no no that came in third. fish wife. what? no not fish. small. fly. fly. flying tart. no no it got off to a flying start. and its name? was dragonfly.
01:07well you hired O'Reilly didn't you? I mean we all warned you. who else would do
01:11something like this? I beg your pardon? you hired O'Reilly. oh I see it's my fault is it?
01:17oh of course. there I was thinking it was your fault because you'd be left in charge.
01:22or Manuel's fault for not waking you and all the time it was my fault. oh it's so
01:27obvious now I've seen the light. well I must be punished then mustn't I? you're a
01:31naughty boy. don't do it. she's going to be back at lunch time. look I'm a dead man. do you realise? you're dead too. we're all dead. don't panic. what else is there to do?
01:47O'Reilly. O'Reilly. O'Reilly. O'Reilly. O'Reilly. O'Reilly. O'Reilly. O'Reilly. O'Reilly. O'Reilly. O'Reilly. O'Reilly. O'Reilly. O'Reilly. O'Reilly. O'Reilly. O'Reilly. O'Reilly. O'Reilly. O'Reilly. O'Reilly. O'Reilly. O'Reilly. O'Reilly. O'Reilly. O'Reilly. O'Reilly. O'Reilly. O'Reilly. O'Reilly. O'Reilly. O'Reilly. O'Reilly. O'Reilly. O'Reilly. O'Reilly. O'Reilly. O'Reilly. O'Reilly. O'Reilly. O'Reilly. O'Reilly. O'Reilly. O'Reilly. O
02:18Right. Another one, Fawlty?
02:20No, no, same one, Major.
02:22Right.
02:27Oh, sorry, sorry. Can't be like that. Sorry.
02:30He's made going into the tap.
02:32In there.
02:43Oh, sorry. Wrong, wrong.
02:45Wrong, wrong.
02:55Back to the basket. I can't live.
02:57Come on, come on. I'm too tired.
02:59Is somebody coming? Mr Fawlty, I no want to work here any more.
03:03Open the basket. Open the basket.
03:09Now, inside.
03:11Not you. I quit.
03:13Get out. I'll strike. I'm warning you.
03:15I stay here. It's nice.
03:18You see this? You're next.
03:20This is your bathroom.
03:22Here we are.
03:24Oh, light's not working. I'll just fix it.
03:26Have you had a tiring journey?
03:29Seven hours in the coach.
03:31Is the dining room still open?
03:33Well, the chef leaves at nine, I'm afraid.
03:35We could always do you sandwiches.
03:37I'd like a hot meal, really.
03:39Is there a restaurant near here?
03:41Well, there's an awfully good little Welsh place.
03:43Leek House. About five minutes' walk.
03:45You'd have to go straight away.
03:46Oh, that'll do fine.
03:47Just turn left out of the gate and straight on,
03:49and it's on your right.
03:58And another thing.
04:00I ask for a room with a view.
04:02Deaf, mad and blind.
04:04This is the view as far as I can remember, madam.
04:07Yes, yes, this is it.
04:09When I pay for a view,
04:11I expect something more interesting than that.
04:13That is Torquay, madam.
04:15It's not good enough.
04:17Well, may I ask what you were expecting to see
04:19out of a Torquay hotel bedroom window?
04:22Sydney Opera House, perhaps?
04:24The hanging gardens of Babylon?
04:26Herds of wildebeests sweeping majestically?
04:29Don't be silly.
04:30I expect to be able to see the sea.
04:32You can see the sea.
04:33It's over there between the land and the sky.
04:36I need a telescope to see that.
04:38Well, may I suggest that you consider
04:40moving to a hotel closer to the sea?
04:42Or preferably in it.
04:44Right.
04:45Now, listen to me.
04:47I'm not satisfied, but I've decided to stay here.
04:50However, I shall expect a reduction.
04:52Why? Because Krakatoa's not erupting at the moment?
04:55You're not an inspect?
04:57No.
04:58Not on the side?
05:00No.
05:01Swear to God.
05:02I tell you, I've nothing to do with this.
05:04Oh, thank you.
05:05Oh, thank you so much.
05:07I don't know how I could ever...
05:12Thanks, thanks.
05:1826 bedrooms, 12 with private bathrooms.
05:21Yes, well, why don't you have dinner here
05:23and Chris and I can try the Clermont?
05:25OK.
05:26The owner's one Basil Fawlty.
05:30Please, senor, Mr Fawlty want to say adios.
05:33He wants to...
05:34Oh!
05:38Mr Fawlty?
05:39He was arriving for dinner.
05:41Oh, Basil, I'm sorry.
05:55Good afternoon, gentlemen.
05:57And what can I do for you three gentlemen?
06:07What are you doing?
06:09What do you mean you've found it?
06:11I've had just about enough of this.
06:13Harry.
06:14How could you forget about it?
06:16Just make me another ward officer.
06:18Make you another ward officer?
06:20What are you making another ward officer for?
06:23Oh, careful, is it boring?
06:25I'm only a little man.
06:26Well, what do you think, Mr and Mrs Hamilton,
06:28what do you think?
06:30Mr Hamilton, may I introduce Terry Hughes?
06:36Where did he go?
06:38Where's he gone? Did you see him?
06:40Maybe he went to get something to eat.
06:42What's the matter with you all?
06:44It's perfectly simple.
06:45We have the fire drill when I ring the fire bell.
06:48That wasn't the fire bell, right?
06:50Well, how are we supposed to know that wasn't the fire bell?
06:53Because it doesn't sound like the fire bell.
06:55Well, how are we supposed to know that wasn't the fire bell?
06:57Because it doesn't sound like the fire bell.
06:59It didn't.
07:00It didn't.
07:01No, it didn't.
07:02The fire bell is a different...
07:03It's a semitone higher.
07:05A cent.
07:06At least, anyway, the fire drill doesn't start till 12 o'clock.
07:09It is 12 o'clock.
07:11Well, it is now,
07:12but that's because we've been standing about arguing about it.
07:15Look, how on earth can you expect us to tell which bell is which?
07:19We haven't heard them yet, have we?
07:21You want to hear them?
07:22Right, suits me.
07:23Here's the burglar alarm.
07:24Ought we to catch them first?
07:26There aren't any.
07:27Then why don't we allow them to go?
07:29All right, got that?
07:30Right.
07:31What's happening now?
07:32Now, here's the fire bell, right?
07:35It's a completely different sound.
07:37Listen.
07:41Well, where are you going?
07:42Well, there is a drill, isn't there?
07:44No, no, no, no, no.
07:46This is so that you can hear the bell,
07:48so you know in a moment when I ring the bell.
07:50What are you doing?
07:51Will you come back?
07:54No, just listen to it, you old fool!
07:57Listen to it!
07:59Fire, fire, everybody up!
08:01No!
08:02Everybody up!
08:03Will you shut up?
08:04Will you shut up?
08:05It's fire!
08:06It's not fire, it's only bells.
08:08Where are you going?
08:09Upstairs.
08:10There isn't a drill yet,
08:11I'm just showing them what the bell sounds like.
08:13Now, will you go in there, go help Chef.
08:15Chef's not here.
08:16Well, go and start the chip.
08:17Chef's here.
08:18Yes, when bells go again, stand.
08:20No fire, only practice.
08:21Tell him, Polly.
08:22Thank you, ladies and gentlemen.
08:23Thank you so much.
08:24Perhaps they're upstairs.
08:26What's happening now?
08:29Now, we'll need it.
08:34You vicious bastard!
08:36Come on!
08:38Oh, my God!
08:40I'm warning you, if you don't start...
08:44I'll count to three.
08:46One, two, three.
08:49Right, that's it.
08:52You've tried it on just once too often.
08:54Right, well, don't say I haven't warned you.
08:57I've laid it on the line to you time and time again.
09:01Right, well, this is it.
09:03I'm going to give you a damn good thrashing.
09:10Right.
09:16She'll love it.
09:17Leave her alone.
09:18No, this is a street.
09:19I mean, I've never seen anyone not laugh at this.
09:21Look, she'll love it.
09:22She's German.
09:24No, Mr. Porter.
09:25What?
09:26Do Jimmy Cagney instead.
09:27What?
09:28Jimmy Cagney.
09:29Jimmy Cagney?
09:30You know, your dirty rags.
09:31I can't do Jimmy Cagney.
09:33Please try.
09:34I'm going to get you.
09:35Shut up!
09:36Yeah, what?
09:37Who's this, then?
09:38Stop, you!
09:42I'll do the funny walk.
09:51Stop it!