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FunTranscript
00:00You have a pizza.
00:10Linda, who is it?
00:16No one, darling.
00:20Cover for me, please.
00:22Hey, what the hell is that? Pizza?
00:24Are you out of your freaking mind?
00:26Come over here.
00:31Honey, it's not mine. It's a mistake.
00:35All you allowed are cucumbers and water.
00:39Remember that?
00:41Come on, breathe.
00:54So, what are you doing here, dude?
00:57I, uh...
00:59There was a glitch in the system.
01:01Hmm. Oh, so we got a free pizza.
01:04What do you got here?
01:06No, no, sir. This is not your pizza.
01:09There was a mistake in the address.
01:11This order is for the house next door.
01:16Ah, those smiths.
01:19His wife won't be able to fit through the door, you know.
01:24Okay, get out of here.
01:27Yeah, sure.
01:34If you ever come near food like that again,
01:37cucumbers and water will be all you eat for the rest of your life.
01:41You got that?
01:43All right, John.
01:45I don't hear that.
01:47Okay, darling.
01:49Good girl.
01:51Excuse me.
01:53What do you want?
01:55I don't know how to open the gate.
01:58Everything's on the phone these days, silly.
02:07Thanks. Bye.
02:14Have a nice day at work, honey.
02:20Listen, I just want you to be slim, you know.
02:23Yes, darling.
02:27Yes.
02:54Ow.
03:03You have to eat cucumbers to be thin.
03:05Yeah, Harvey, but I can't do it anymore.
03:08You have to exercise to be thin.
03:24Ah!
03:30It's you.
03:37What are you doing here?
03:39I'm sorry. I heard you were really hungry, but you didn't answer that door.
03:43Here.
03:46Oh, my gosh. Thank you. You're a lifesaver.
03:59Don't worry. This is Harvey, my friend. He's just a toy.
04:03Harvey is your friend.
04:05Uh, these are for other people, but you need to eat.
04:11I haven't had a decent meal in months.
04:14Happy to help.
04:16Hey, I'll be going.
04:18No. Wait.
04:21Stay with me and eat.
04:23I have to thank you and...
04:26Are you hungry?
04:30Water and cucumbers will be fine.
04:33Come in.
04:36So...
04:38Why you stay here?
04:40He obviously doesn't love you. He's just mocking you.
04:44No.
04:46He's nice.
04:48He just wants to see me in good shape.
04:51Oh, yeah, of course. He's nice.
04:54He's nice.
04:56He's nice.
04:58He's nice.
05:00He's nice.
05:02He's nice.
05:04He's nice.
05:06He just likes a pair of butterfly wings.
05:09He's nice. He just works for...
05:11Teleban.
05:13Stop it!
05:21Tomorrow, I'll regret this...
05:24But today...
05:26I'm happy.
05:32Oh no. Oh no. Oh no no no no. Be quiet.
05:39Hi honey!
05:40Hey! What's going on?
05:42Um, I'm just watching a movie, chewing.
05:46Wait. What's that on your cheek?
05:51Um, it's... it's a lip balm.
05:56What's that on your cheek?
05:59Um, it's... it's a lipstick.
06:03Lipstick that, huh?
06:05You know what, sweetheart? It's time for waiting.
06:09So get on the scale. I'm waiting for the results.
06:12Of course, honey. Bye.
06:21I'm so screwed.
06:23Why? Just tell him the weight is fine.
06:25Haven't you noticed? He's a tech geek.
06:27The smart scale will send him a message.
06:32So, how much did I eat?
06:36Uh, double pepperoni pasta, about a pound.
06:40Uh, plus a cinnabon, plus a soda, another pound.
06:44How much are you supposed to weigh?
06:46A hundred pounds tops.
06:49Oh no.
06:56I have an idea.
07:02How much does it weigh?
07:04Uh, like ten ounce.
07:10He's gonna kill me.
07:12Linda! I look at you.
07:16You're the most beautiful woman in the world.
07:19Don't torture yourself with this jerk.
07:22You don't understand. I can't...
07:29I have an idea.
07:31Where is the scale?
07:45Okay, it's about twelve gallons.
07:49That's approximately one hundred pounds.
07:52Approximately? I need to know exactly.
07:55It will be fine.
08:04No, no, no, no, no, no!
08:19No!
08:34Did you lose two pounds?
08:38Are you trying to cheat me, sweetheart?
08:50Thank you, Ken.
08:52I don't know what I would have done without you.
08:55Glad I could help.
08:57I throwed this out on the way.
09:08Bye.
09:11Bye.
09:12Are you making a fool of me?
09:20What's going on?
09:26There must be cameras in there.
09:28And he saw you.
09:37There's no connection.
09:39And there won't be.
09:41It's over for both of us.
09:43It's over.
09:45And there won't be.
09:47It's over for both of us.
09:49Alarm mode. Alarm mode.
09:51Alarm mode. Alarm mode.
09:53Alarm mode. Alarm mode.
09:56Harvey's your friend, huh?
09:58He's just a toy.
10:02Hey, don't worry.
10:04We'll figure something out.
10:07Alarm mode. Alarm mode.
10:09Alarm mode. Alarm mode.
10:16Linda.
10:20You.
10:23Sweetheart.
10:25I work. Don't try to fool me.
10:32Sweetheart, you know, honey.
10:34I'm just thinking about you, you know.
10:38I want you to be thin and beautiful, you know.
10:46Linda!
10:48Don't try to hide, huh?
10:55What the...
10:58It's too late to lose weight, honey.
11:10Ah.
11:12Well, your knight has come to the rescue, yeah?
11:26You're gonna regret this.
11:35No, no, no. You made a mistake. You didn't hear him.
11:37He broke into my house. He's a criminal.
11:41There's all the evidence here, officer.
11:50I can't believe it's over.
11:53So, what am I gonna do now?
11:57Well, for the starters, we could order a pizza.
12:04You have to eat cucumbers to be thin.
12:07You have to eat cucumbers to be thin.
12:09Shut up, Harvey.