Somewhere in Camp is a 1942 British comedy film directed by John E. Blakeley and starring Frank Randle, Harry Korris and Robbie Vincent. The film continues the adventures of Private Randle from the 1940 film Somewhere in England. It was followed in 1943 by Somewhere on Leave.
Plot
Three army Privates (Frank Randle, Robbie Vincent and Dan Young) and their Sergeant (Harry Korris) devise a scheme to help Private Trevor (John Singer) woo the Commanding Officer's daughter (Jean Rivers). All efforts fail until Sergeant Korris drags up as a love-struck housekeeper.
Source: Wikipedia
Plot
Three army Privates (Frank Randle, Robbie Vincent and Dan Young) and their Sergeant (Harry Korris) devise a scheme to help Private Trevor (John Singer) woo the Commanding Officer's daughter (Jean Rivers). All efforts fail until Sergeant Korris drags up as a love-struck housekeeper.
Source: Wikipedia
Category
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Short filmTranscript
00:00:00And when the war is over, how sorry I shall be, for somewhere in Canterbury, mother, I've
00:00:20seen a home from home go me.
00:00:30And when the war is over, how sorry I shall be, for somewhere in Canterbury, mother,
00:00:37I've seen a home from home go me.
00:01:00Come in.
00:01:07Hello, Daddy.
00:01:13Hello, Jean.
00:01:17I'm off duty now, Daddy, and as I want to call in town on my way home, I think I'd better
00:01:21be going.
00:01:22In any case, you'd have to go rather early.
00:01:24You girls take hours getting ready for a dance.
00:01:26Now, mind you're not late home.
00:01:27I do want you to see my new dance frock.
00:01:29Don't worry, my dear, I'll try to get home before you go.
00:01:33Oh, sorry, sir.
00:01:34Oh, that's quite all right.
00:01:35Come in, Bron.
00:01:36Good afternoon, Jean.
00:01:37Good afternoon, Captain Bron.
00:01:38You know, Jean's just over the moon about the dance tonight.
00:01:41Well, I'm hoping you'll reserve one or two dances for me, Jean.
00:01:43You never know.
00:01:44Well, I'm looking forward to the pleasure of your charming company for a while, anyhow.
00:01:46Oh, I think we can safely leave that to Jean.
00:01:49Well, I think I'd better be going.
00:01:50Goodbye, Daddy.
00:01:51Bye-bye, darling.
00:01:52Goodbye, Captain Bron.
00:01:53Goodbye, Jean.
00:01:57Jean's a lovely girl, sir.
00:01:58You're telling me, Bron.
00:02:01How do you do?
00:02:04Sergeant Corrie.
00:02:05Sir.
00:02:06Just a minute.
00:02:07Where are you going?
00:02:08I'm on my way to the lecture room, sir, to hear Private Trevor.
00:02:10I give all the boys a chance to give a lecture.
00:02:12It's his turn today, sir.
00:02:13Oh, I see.
00:02:14So it's Trevor's turn today.
00:02:15Yes, sir.
00:02:16Jolly good idea, Sergeant.
00:02:17I'll come with you.
00:02:18Good.
00:02:19I say, have you seen the new girl in charge of the canteen?
00:02:21No, sir.
00:02:22What's she like?
00:02:23They call her Spitfire.
00:02:24I knew she was a fighter as soon as I landed.
00:02:27Oh, I'll tell him.
00:02:28Where is he?
00:02:29Let me tell you.
00:02:31Oh, it's here again.
00:02:32You've still got that sour look on your face.
00:02:35Aye, well, I've run out of me sugar ration.
00:02:37Well, I told you, all you've got to do is to go to the chemist and ask for some saccharine tablets.
00:02:42But I can't say saccharine.
00:02:44Nay, you've just said it.
00:02:46But I couldn't say saccharine in the chemist's shop.
00:02:48Well, what did you ask for?
00:02:49I asked for sirene tablets.
00:02:51And did you get them?
00:02:52Yes.
00:02:53Well, hurry back and ask for some clear gums.
00:02:55Oh, what can you do with them?
00:02:56Now, listen.
00:02:57Have you seen the new girl in the canteen?
00:02:59No, what's she like?
00:03:00Oh, marvellous, lovely girl.
00:03:01They call her Web.
00:03:02I knew she was fly as soon as a spider.
00:03:04Oh, it's no good telling him anything.
00:03:06He's daft.
00:03:07Do you know he doesn't know the difference between a ten shilling note and a sixpence?
00:03:10What, do you mean to tell me he doesn't know the difference in value?
00:03:13No.
00:03:14Have you got a ten shilling note, sir?
00:03:15I haven't.
00:03:16Lend it me.
00:03:17I've got a tanner somewhere.
00:03:18Now then, my little autumn crocus, which would you prefer?
00:03:20That little coin or that little bit of paper?
00:03:22That little coin.
00:03:23See, he's daft.
00:03:25But I'll wrap it up in that bit of paper.
00:03:28On the other hand, a very deeply buried bomb, or one that has jinked sideways as I explained in figure number two,
00:03:34may form an underground cavity and it might be reported as an unexploded bomb.
00:03:39Bomb explosion indicators are being issued which will indicate the presence of gas,
00:03:44thus showing that explosion has taken place.
00:03:47But don't forget, it's promptness and decision that count.
00:03:51Thousands of lives may be saved by promptness and decision.
00:03:56Now I'll draw figure number three.
00:03:57Aye, jingle, this Trevor knows how to put his stuff over.
00:04:00Yes, sir.
00:04:01Gone through all his courses with flying colours.
00:04:03He's a great boy.
00:04:05He's worth watching.
00:04:06In more than one sense, they say he's very keen on the CO's daughter.
00:04:10I've heard that too, sir.
00:04:11Excuse me, I must get back on parade.
00:04:13Very good, carry on, Sergeant.
00:04:21Out! Right turn! Stand at ease! Stand easy!
00:04:42Why should I be punished with such a crowd? That's what I want to know.
00:04:46My mother said I was a champion when I was a boy.
00:04:49Is your mother daft as well? Look at you, look at you, dreams of delight.
00:04:53Am I a dream of delight?
00:04:55No, you're just a nightmare.
00:04:57Still, I suppose you can't help it, you were all born on a foggy night.
00:05:01Hello, I'm one missy.
00:05:03Aye, it's Private Rundle, Sergeant.
00:05:05What, that dopey duck? Well, if I never see him again, it'll be too soon.
00:05:11I'm full of gas.
00:05:13Bye!
00:05:20Where's the ticket?
00:05:24Wait for me!
00:05:32Who did that? Who did that to me?
00:05:34Did you push me?
00:05:35Yes, I did.
00:05:36Now listen, if you do that again, I'll smack your little face.
00:05:38What?
00:05:39Do that again.
00:05:40Do that again?
00:05:41Do that.
00:05:42Do it over and over again. If you do that to me again, I'll smack your little face.
00:05:44I'll poke me eye in your finger.
00:05:46You would?
00:05:47I'll knock your stomach off your chest.
00:05:48You would?
00:05:49I'll separate you from your breath.
00:05:50Come here.
00:05:51Now then, pull yourselves together.
00:05:52Where have you been? If you're late again, you'll get to know something.
00:05:55I know something now.
00:05:56What's that?
00:05:57It's still on me foot.
00:05:58Oh, you don't know you're born, if you ever were.
00:06:00Well, I was.
00:06:01When, if any?
00:06:02Christmas Eve.
00:06:03Christmas Eve, that's funny. I wonder why.
00:06:04I wanted to be home for Christmas.
00:06:06Oh, what a crowd. What a crowd. Hitler's present from Britain.
00:06:11Struth, I didn't see you here.
00:06:13I've been here all the time.
00:06:15Woof! Woof!
00:06:16What's the matter with you?
00:06:17Woof!
00:06:18Well, do you know them little sausages I had for me dinner?
00:06:21Well, what about them?
00:06:22Well, Dog wants to get out.
00:06:23Oh.
00:06:24Hey, listen, Cock.
00:06:25Cock, that's enough.
00:06:26Sergeant to you.
00:06:27Cock, Sergeant.
00:06:28Silence, you mugs.
00:06:30Well, Sergeant, what have we got here?
00:06:32That's just what I've been wondering, sir.
00:06:34Well, surely I've seen those men in the second line before.
00:06:36I suppose you've got the other men on parade to stiffen the front line, eh?
00:06:38To stiffen them? They're a bunch of stiffs, sir.
00:06:40Oh, whatever have they come from?
00:06:42Still, they look promising.
00:06:43Promising? It all depends what you promise them.
00:06:47Now, my man, what were you in civilian life?
00:06:49What were you in civilian life?
00:06:51Oh, me?
00:06:52Yes, you.
00:06:53Oh, do you mean when I was working for a living?
00:06:54Yes, when you were working.
00:06:55Oh, I used to train performing fleas.
00:06:56Performing fleas?
00:06:57Well, you had to scutch for a living, eh?
00:06:58Don't be a twillop.
00:06:59I beg your pardon?
00:07:00Oh, I'm sorry, sir.
00:07:01Have you ever seen a performing flea?
00:07:02No.
00:07:03Well, train me a flea, will you?
00:07:04Oh, be quiet.
00:07:05Do you know it took me three months to train two performing fleas to do the splits on a circular saw?
00:07:09Well, no wonder you look tired.
00:07:10Where do you come from?
00:07:11You're Dundee Inquisitive, aren't you?
00:07:13Do you know who you...
00:07:14I beg your pardon, sir?
00:07:15Well, as a matter of fact, the stork brought me.
00:07:17Well, tell the stork to take you back.
00:07:18You shut your gob.
00:07:19Yes, you be quiet.
00:07:20I'll tell him. I'll tell him.
00:07:22Do you know that you're talking...
00:07:23Oh, I do beg your pardon, sir?
00:07:24As a matter of fact, where do you come from?
00:07:26Well, if you must know, I come from Taos.
00:07:29Hmm. Blimey, you look like it, too.
00:07:31Silence. Do you know who you're talking to?
00:07:33I'm talking to the engineer, not the oil rag.
00:07:35He's a bunny lad, too, aren't he?
00:07:37I'm not too busy, sir.
00:07:38Oh, stop that.
00:07:39Oh, all right, then.
00:07:40Who wished these men on to us?
00:07:42That's the puzzle, sir.
00:07:43Well, Sergeant, I dare say you can lick them into shape.
00:07:45Lick us into shape?
00:07:46What did you take us for, a lot of kittens?
00:07:48Well, I'll hand them over to you, Sergeant.
00:07:50Thank you, sir, for nothing.
00:07:51You carry on.
00:07:52He's a nice fellow.
00:07:53I think he likes us, mate.
00:07:54I'm no mate of yours.
00:07:56You're telling me.
00:07:57Where are you going?
00:07:58I'm going to ring my girl up.
00:07:59You're too late.
00:08:00I rang her up half an hour ago.
00:08:02Well, you cheeky...
00:08:04Thanks.
00:08:05Now, I'm going to give you a talk on discipline.
00:08:07Discipline is the backbone of the army.
00:08:09Well, what am I supposed to mean?
00:08:11The funny bone.
00:08:12I'll run thee for a shilling.
00:08:13Shut up.
00:08:14I'll toss you for a tanner.
00:08:15I'm going to talk to you about discipline.
00:08:16Do you know anything about discipline?
00:08:17I ought to.
00:08:18I've been married ten years.
00:08:19Oh, well.
00:08:20I won't be too hard on you for a start.
00:08:22So now you can fall out for a smoke.
00:08:31You know, I'm not really a bad sergeant to you.
00:08:35You could give me one of those.
00:08:37Could I?
00:08:38What a pity.
00:08:39There isn't one left.
00:08:40So that's it, is it?
00:08:41All right.
00:08:42Fall in, the lot of you.
00:08:44Put those cigarettes out.
00:08:45You're on parade now.
00:08:46I see it's just a waste of time.
00:08:48I've tried you with kindness.
00:08:49It's no use.
00:08:50All right, then.
00:08:51Here's the rough stuff.
00:08:52I'll be hard like a real sergeant.
00:08:54I'll march you.
00:08:55I'll march you everywhere.
00:08:56I'll march you up and down until you're all dizzy.
00:09:00Parade, march!
00:09:02Right turn!
00:09:03Take march!
00:09:04Left!
00:09:05Left!
00:09:06Left!
00:09:07Right!
00:09:08About turn!
00:09:09Left!
00:09:10Left!
00:09:11Left!
00:09:12Right!
00:09:13Left!
00:09:14About turn!
00:09:15Left!
00:09:16Left!
00:09:17Left!
00:09:18Right!
00:09:19Left!
00:09:20Take it up there!
00:09:21About turn!
00:09:22Left!
00:09:23Left!
00:09:24Left!
00:09:25Right!
00:09:26Left!
00:09:27About turn!
00:09:28Left! Left! Right! Left!
00:09:30You set of heathens!
00:09:32I'll teach you to respect me!
00:09:34You bunch of potherbs! Halt!
00:09:38Where the hell have they all gone to?
00:09:40Robinson seems much better than he was this morning.
00:09:43But he'll still have to have special attention.
00:09:45I think I'll change his medicine.
00:09:49Oh, by the way, Doctor, did you arrange for a relief nurse for this ward?
00:09:52I'm glad you reminded me about that.
00:09:54I have a niece who's a trained nurse.
00:09:56She's coming to her ring right now.
00:09:58She might help us out.
00:10:01Hello? Wentworth Military Hospital, Captain Rivers speaking.
00:10:06Oh, is that you, Tom?
00:10:08Yes. How's everybody?
00:10:10Oh, that's marvellous.
00:10:11Now, I was wondering if you can help me out of a bit of a jam.
00:10:13We're frightfully short of nurses here,
00:10:15and it occurred to me that you might be able to arrange for Jean to come and help us out.
00:10:19I hardly think so, John.
00:10:22We ourselves are not in too happy a position at the moment.
00:10:25However, I'll get into the matter.
00:10:28Perhaps it can be arranged.
00:10:30Suppose I give you a ring in a day or two.
00:10:34They're just grand.
00:10:36Well, cheerio, boy. Cheerio.
00:10:42Now, you fellows, this is the sergeant's mess.
00:10:45What can I do, Sergeant?
00:10:47Hire a tea-total.
00:10:48Aye, I don't drink. I take after my grandfather.
00:10:52He didn't drink, and he lived till he was 75.
00:10:56Get away. My grandfather lived till he was 105.
00:10:58Drank every day of his life.
00:11:00He's been dead two years.
00:11:02We dug him up last week. He looks better than you do now.
00:11:05Go on, I'll find a job for you.
00:11:09Well, as your tea-total, I can trust you behind the bar.
00:11:11You can and all.
00:11:13I know how much money there's in the till,
00:11:15so don't get your fingers trapped.
00:11:19I don't suppose there'll be much for me to do, Sergeant.
00:11:21Well, it all depends.
00:11:23Will you have one?
00:11:24Well, let me buy you one.
00:11:26Well, I'm not supposed to drink with common privates.
00:11:28A pint.
00:11:29Who'll serve us?
00:11:30He will.
00:11:31A pint and a half of ale.
00:11:33I said a pint.
00:11:34I know. I heard you.
00:11:35They asked for me.
00:11:37Well, good ale.
00:11:44Ooh, what a smell.
00:11:46Are we having another?
00:11:48Aye. Who's paying?
00:11:49You, of course. I'm allowing you.
00:11:51Oh, it's very good of you.
00:11:53You see, I might be able to do you a little favour.
00:11:56What's that?
00:11:57Well, I might miss your name off the fatigue parties.
00:12:00Oh, aye.
00:12:01Here's another pint for the Sergeant.
00:12:16Did you ever have one knocked over?
00:12:18Drink them quick and keep them down. That's my motto.
00:12:20I see.
00:12:21When I have a favour done me, I like to pay it back.
00:12:25Good. I'll have a pint.
00:12:27Not with me, you won't.
00:12:28I could strike your name off fatigue now, if I wanted to.
00:12:32But I've no more money left. I'm skint.
00:12:34That's no good to me.
00:12:36Come on. Get a move on.
00:12:37Well, you said you'd scratch my name off.
00:12:39I said I might if I wanted to, but I don't want to now.
00:12:42Come on. Get busy.
00:12:43Oh, some say good, old Sergeant.
00:12:45Do they?
00:12:47Others aren't so particular.
00:12:48It's like that, is it?
00:12:49Well, I'll show you whether I'm particular or not.
00:12:51Come on. Get a move on.
00:12:56Now, you two, your job is this billiards table.
00:12:59The RAF are coming tonight to play a match,
00:13:01and I want everything in first-class condition. Understand?
00:13:04OK. What do we do at it?
00:13:05Well, you wash it down, polish, brush and iron it.
00:13:09Make it look beautiful. Understand?
00:13:11All perfectly sorted.
00:13:12Well, get on with it.
00:13:15Now, you fellows, I want you to make this place a credit to the camp.
00:13:19And if when I come back it's not right, you're fired.
00:13:22The lot of you.
00:13:32What a splash. What a splash.
00:13:34Get me a cue, will you?
00:13:35Get a what?
00:13:36I'll tell you what. Before we start, I'll show you a nice little trick.
00:13:38A trick?
00:13:39A beauty.
00:13:40Is it a cow trick or a monkey trick?
00:13:41It just depends who's doing it.
00:13:42Get me a cue, will you?
00:13:44This is the most marvellous trick you've ever seen in your life.
00:13:46Really? What's the idea?
00:13:48Edith?
00:13:49Yes?
00:13:50Two pints.
00:13:51Right you are. And one for me.
00:13:53Aye, put them down to the sergeant.
00:13:55Oh, Dickens.
00:13:56Hello, hello, hello.
00:13:58It's all right now.
00:14:00This will be a good trick if you do it.
00:14:01Oh, it's a good trick if I don't do it.
00:14:03The idea is to get that into that pocket there, and this one into this pocket here.
00:14:07Oh, I see, yes.
00:14:08Goes to that pocket, this one comes back.
00:14:10This is going to be good.
00:14:11Keep your eyes open, will you?
00:14:12Aye.
00:14:13Shh.
00:14:14What's the trouble?
00:14:15You're breathing.
00:14:16Right.
00:14:17Now.
00:14:19Oh!
00:14:20Oh, no waiters for a moment.
00:14:22Go on, get me another cue.
00:14:23Get what?
00:14:24Get me another cue.
00:14:28That should be all right.
00:14:30Here you are, boy.
00:14:32What about this?
00:14:33Oh, they'll never notice that.
00:14:35No?
00:14:36Here, I'll show you another trick.
00:14:37Another trick?
00:14:38Yes, even better than the first.
00:14:39Really?
00:14:40Give me those balls, will you?
00:14:41With pleasure, my friend.
00:14:42Go on, we'll show these tricks.
00:14:43Go on.
00:14:44Now then, thank you.
00:14:45I won't want that.
00:14:46Now, this is what they call a kiss cannon.
00:14:48A kiss cannon?
00:14:49Yes.
00:14:50This ball goes in that pocket, that ball goes in that pocket, and this kisses.
00:14:53It kisses, I see.
00:14:54Yes.
00:14:55Here.
00:14:56Oh, it's simple.
00:14:57Go on, hit it, hit it, hit it.
00:14:58I'll hit it, I'll hit it.
00:14:59Go on.
00:15:01You are a silly arse.
00:15:02You're a clown, that's what you are.
00:15:03Who is?
00:15:04You are.
00:15:05Now, pick it on me again.
00:15:06I wasn't picking on you.
00:15:07You were picking on me.
00:15:08I'll stick this down your gob.
00:15:09Who is?
00:15:10You?
00:15:11I'll get you for this.
00:15:12I've wounded, I've wounded.
00:15:13Come on.
00:15:14Here it is, here it is.
00:15:15Go away.
00:15:16Give me that.
00:15:17Go and fetch me a bucket of water.
00:15:18Water?
00:15:19Yes.
00:15:20In the bucket?
00:15:21Of course, in the bucket.
00:15:22Oh.
00:15:23Oh.
00:15:24Oh.
00:15:25Oh.
00:15:26Oh.
00:15:27Oh.
00:15:28Oh.
00:15:29Oh.
00:15:30Oh.
00:15:31Oh.
00:15:32Oh.
00:15:33Oh.
00:15:34Oh.
00:15:35Oh.
00:15:36Oh.
00:15:37Oh.
00:15:38Oh.
00:15:39Oh.
00:15:40Oh.
00:15:41Oh.
00:15:42Oh.
00:15:43Oh.
00:15:44Oh.
00:15:45Oh.
00:15:46Oh.
00:15:47Oh.
00:15:48Oh.
00:15:49Oh.
00:15:50Oh.
00:15:51Oh.
00:15:52Oh.
00:15:53Oh.
00:15:54Oh.
00:15:55Where's that bucket of water?
00:15:56Coming up, coming up, coming up.
00:15:57Oh dear.
00:15:58Oh.
00:15:59Now, what's on there?
00:16:00Oh.
00:16:01Oh.
00:16:02Oh.
00:16:03Oh.
00:16:04Oh.
00:16:05Oh.
00:16:06Oh.
00:16:07Oh.
00:16:08Oh.
00:16:09Oh, whoosh.
00:16:11Oh, help!
00:16:15Where are you? Help!
00:16:17What's going on?
00:16:18Oh, how did you get up there?
00:16:19Let go!
00:16:20Let go!
00:16:21What are you doing?
00:16:23I can't get up there.
00:16:24I'll get the sergeant. I'll get the sergeant.
00:16:26Oh, help!
00:16:32Now, what have you got to do now?
00:16:34It'll be all right in a bit.
00:16:35In a bit?
00:16:36If you're not careful, you'll ruin this table.
00:16:38You know what the sergeant said?
00:16:39No, what did he say?
00:16:40He wants us to wash it, brush it, polish it and iron it.
00:16:42That's an idea.
00:16:43Yes. Go and get me the hot iron.
00:16:44Hot?
00:16:45Yes.
00:16:47By God, I'll bet it'll be a champion match tonight.
00:16:50Here we are.
00:16:53What are you doing?
00:16:54Give it to me. Give it to me.
00:16:56That's the idea.
00:16:58That's not the way to iron it. That's the way to iron it.
00:17:00You think I don't know how to iron a billiard table yet?
00:17:02You don't.
00:17:03Don't talk so dumb.
00:17:04You're the one that's sloppy, not me.
00:17:05Oh, so you're at it again.
00:17:08You throw that at me. You throw that at me and I'll scream.
00:17:13Hide him now, lads.
00:17:19The sergeant's mess.
00:17:21And what a ruddy mess.
00:17:38I'll show you.
00:17:51Like it?
00:17:53Nay, nay.
00:17:54Can't you behave yourself for once?
00:17:56Don't put this, deputy.
00:17:57No, you get worse. Now, we're going in here.
00:17:59Which way?
00:18:00I'll show you. Follow me.
00:18:02Now then, push.
00:18:04Push, push. Can't you push?
00:18:05I am pushing.
00:18:06I am pushing. Well, push without sobbing.
00:18:08Well, why are the dickies doing this here?
00:18:10You're pushing the wrong way.
00:18:11You're blithering in here.
00:18:12This way.
00:18:13Push.
00:18:17Right, boom. That's a quick gance.
00:18:19We're outside, you fathead.
00:18:21I know damn well where we are.
00:18:22It's your fault.
00:18:23Why's that?
00:18:24Treading on me heels.
00:18:25Now, we're going in again.
00:18:26Right, you push that one. I'll come in the next one.
00:18:28Right.
00:18:32Well, that's a bodily garr.
00:18:34Bloody do.
00:18:36Come in here, come in here.
00:18:37That's the mayor's daughter.
00:18:39That's my target for tonight.
00:18:40I'll wait for her.
00:18:41You've no need to. She's got in.
00:18:43Has she?
00:18:44I'll try that.
00:18:46Watch me.
00:18:56What are you playing at?
00:18:57Can't you close the door?
00:18:58No.
00:18:59We're trying to get in here.
00:19:00Have you got a ticket?
00:19:01Yes. There's mine.
00:19:03I had one yesterday.
00:19:04Try the head office.
00:19:05No.
00:19:06Well, I knew I had one.
00:19:08Well, follow me.
00:19:09And no monkey tricks this time.
00:19:19Ooh, what's all over the place?
00:19:21Some nice bits of stuff knocking about, too.
00:19:23Now then, what do you want?
00:19:25I want a nice girl, please.
00:19:26Oh, a nice girl, eh?
00:19:27Yes.
00:19:28What for?
00:19:29Well, what do you think for? To play marbles with?
00:19:31Ooh, there's Horton.
00:19:33Hey.
00:19:36Oh.
00:19:46Good evening.
00:19:47Pardon?
00:19:48I said, good evening, that's all.
00:19:49How quaint.
00:19:50You think so?
00:19:51Yes.
00:19:52You...
00:19:53I'll warn thee.
00:19:54You're perfectly priceless.
00:19:56Really?
00:19:57Oh, goodbye, then.
00:19:58Oh, how disgusting.
00:19:59Oh, very well, then.
00:20:00By the way, what is your name?
00:20:01Just have a guess.
00:20:02I should say Frozen Fanny.
00:20:05You almost amuse me.
00:20:06You do, really.
00:20:08Why, isn't that your name?
00:20:09Oh, I don't mind, if you like it that way.
00:20:11Oh, I like it anyway.
00:20:12How about a dance with the gentleman?
00:20:14Uh, bring him to me.
00:20:16I mean me.
00:20:17You?
00:20:18Yes.
00:20:19Oh, dear.
00:20:20I could almost laugh.
00:20:21Oh, I wouldn't do that to you, me laddie.
00:20:22You're stalking me.
00:20:23I've met some specimens in my time.
00:20:25Well, what do you think I am, a gorilla?
00:20:26No, gorillas have brains.
00:20:28That's more than blondes have, anyway.
00:20:30Pardon?
00:20:31You heard.
00:20:32You're not, uh, polished enough.
00:20:33Polished?
00:20:34Will you take me for a coffin?
00:20:35What do you think I am?
00:20:37Well, as a matter of fact, I think you're a nice piece of homework.
00:20:40Come on, have a dance with me.
00:20:42I've only had seven scotches on the rumba.
00:20:44Uh, by the way, are you married?
00:20:45Yes.
00:20:46Ah.
00:20:47Where's your husband?
00:20:48He's dead.
00:20:49Good.
00:20:50I mean, uh, I'm sorry.
00:20:51You needn't bother.
00:20:52Oh, what a woman.
00:20:53You're just too tall.
00:20:55Really?
00:20:56I will dance with you.
00:20:57Good.
00:20:58Well, in that case, if you will dance with me, I shall dance with you.
00:21:01Come, then.
00:21:02Ha!
00:21:03On with the dance.
00:21:06Good evening.
00:21:08Good evening, Jean.
00:21:09Good evening, Captain Brown.
00:21:10I didn't expect you so early.
00:21:11Daddy said you were very busy.
00:21:12Oh, well, we adjutants are always very busy, you know.
00:21:14But I made a special effort, and here I am.
00:21:16It's awfully good of you to be so interested.
00:21:18Well, whenever you are, Jean, it's a pleasure.
00:21:19It's nice of you to say so.
00:21:20Now, don't forget, Jean, I'm expecting several dancers with you.
00:21:22Marvellous!
00:21:24Jack!
00:21:25Hello, Jean.
00:21:26I thought you were never coming.
00:21:27Why is it you're always late?
00:21:28I'm so sorry, my dear.
00:21:29Still, I'm in time for the first dance, aren't I?
00:21:31Only just.
00:21:32Gosh, Jean, you look lovely tonight.
00:21:34Thank you, kind sir.
00:21:35I hope I'm not intruding.
00:21:36Oh, not at all.
00:21:37Jean, I've never seen you look so happy.
00:21:39I must have the first dance with you.
00:21:40I'm afraid not, Captain.
00:21:41But why not?
00:21:42Because I promised it to my friend.
00:21:44Oh, well, I'll try again later on.
00:21:47He's got to help.
00:22:02You know, you dance divinely.
00:22:04Dancing?
00:22:05Why, that's my middle name.
00:22:06In my home town, I've got them crawling up the walls.
00:22:10Crawling up the walls?
00:22:11There must be some big bugs in your home town.
00:22:15Let me tell you, my father died dancing.
00:22:20Did he?
00:22:21Yes, I'm sure of it.
00:22:22I've been a dancer all my life.
00:22:23I've been a dancer all my life.
00:22:24I'm the wonder woman of the world.
00:22:27My father died, Dunsin.
00:22:30Did he?
00:22:31Aye, at the end of a row.
00:22:58What a glorious night.
00:23:00Yes, it is lovely.
00:23:01Just the setting for something I want to say to you.
00:23:03Oh?
00:23:04I love you, Jean.
00:23:06I want you to tell me if there's any chance.
00:23:09Do you love me, Jean? Do you?
00:23:11Oh, I like you a lot, Jack, but...
00:23:13Oh, excuse me.
00:23:14I've been searching all over the dance hall for you.
00:23:16Is the next dance mine, Jean?
00:23:17I'm afraid not, Captain. Sorry.
00:23:19Well, shall we say we'll have the last dance, then?
00:23:21Well, as a matter of fact, I've promised that, too.
00:23:23Oh, but don't worry.
00:23:24I can run you home in my car afterwards.
00:23:26Oh, it's awfully good of you.
00:23:27But is it such a lovely night, I'd rather walk home.
00:23:30Alone?
00:23:31I hope not.
00:23:33Oh, well.
00:23:36Nice evening, sir.
00:23:37There's nothing nice about it up to now.
00:23:41What have you two lovebirds done to the Captain?
00:23:43He seems ruffled.
00:23:44Oh, I'm sorry about that.
00:23:46A couple like you should be inside dancing,
00:23:48not getting cold out here.
00:23:49I've something very important to say to Miss Rivers.
00:23:52Well, that's all right.
00:23:53You can tell her in front of me.
00:23:55I mean, alone.
00:23:56Oh, I see.
00:23:57I can take a hint as good as anybody.
00:23:59What were you going to tell her?
00:24:00That's my business.
00:24:01I know what's the matter with him.
00:24:03Do you, Sergeant?
00:24:04He's in love.
00:24:05I can see it in his passionate eyes.
00:24:07Can't you?
00:24:08I wish you'd go away.
00:24:09All right, don't worry.
00:24:10I'm going.
00:24:11As I was saying, he's going to ask you if you love him.
00:24:14Do you?
00:24:15Well, really, Sergeant.
00:24:16Nay, nay, I'm on your side.
00:24:18Oh, well.
00:24:20Love is a dream and marriage is the knocker-up.
00:24:23But I believe in people marrying as young as possible.
00:24:26Do you?
00:24:27Then they live longer to regret it.
00:24:29Oh, Sergeant.
00:24:30Won't somebody be wanting to see you in the dance?
00:24:33Oh, that doesn't matter.
00:24:34I'm not a bit fussy.
00:24:35I just wanted to give you a bit of advice.
00:24:37Now, when you're married, never quarrel in the house.
00:24:40Go outside.
00:24:41There's more room.
00:24:42Listen, Jack.
00:24:43Have you thought about marriage seriously?
00:24:45I have.
00:24:46You have?
00:24:47Then you'll remain single.
00:24:48Oh, really, Sergeant.
00:24:49You do say some queer things.
00:24:50He talks a lot of nonsense.
00:24:51There you are.
00:24:52That's what I get for giving advice.
00:24:54If I were you too, I should go indoors.
00:24:56People will be wondering what's become of you.
00:24:58Oh, but listen, Gene, I...
00:25:00Jack, I think the Sergeant's right.
00:25:02Oh, all right.
00:25:03Perhaps I can talk to you later.
00:25:10Did you get in touch with the ordnance people
00:25:12about the new heating scheme?
00:25:13Yes, sir, this morning.
00:25:14I expect the work will be put in hands straight away.
00:25:16That's good.
00:25:17Oh, by the way, Brown,
00:25:18did you enjoy the dance last night?
00:25:20Yes, sir, and no.
00:25:22Why the no part?
00:25:23Well, I must confess,
00:25:24I had hoped for a few dances with Miss Gene.
00:25:26Of course.
00:25:27Well?
00:25:28I didn't have a single dance with her.
00:25:29Not one dance with my daughter?
00:25:31How's that?
00:25:32Well, to tell the truth, sir,
00:25:33I sometimes seem to be occupied with someone else.
00:25:36Oh.
00:25:37His name?
00:25:38Trevor, sir.
00:25:39Private Trevor.
00:25:40Oh, that's not the first rumour I've heard.
00:25:41I must ask Gene what it all means.
00:25:43They appear to be on very friendly terms, sir.
00:25:44Hmm, so it seems.
00:25:46I happened to go on the balcony during the dance.
00:25:47Well?
00:25:48And I came across a very affectionate scene
00:25:49between Gene and this private chap.
00:25:51It's a bit of a shock, I can tell you.
00:25:52Quite so, Brown.
00:25:53Trevor, eh?
00:25:55He comes from quite decent people and all that.
00:25:57He's known Gene for quite a time.
00:25:59Damn it all, we had other ideas for Gene.
00:26:01Yes, I felt that.
00:26:03Now, don't worry, Brown,
00:26:04it's just a mild flirtation, I hope.
00:26:06I'll have a good talk with her.
00:26:07So will her mother.
00:26:08We'll get her to see things in the right light.
00:26:10Well, I hope so, sir.
00:26:11Oh, besides, he'll be leaving here soon, you know.
00:26:13He's been recommended for a commission.
00:26:14Oh, yes, I'd forgotten.
00:26:15Gene would never do anything
00:26:16against the wishes of her parents, I know that.
00:26:20Well then, you, you, you, you, and you.
00:26:26That's enough, that's enough, that's enough.
00:26:28Now, you five are for the M.O.
00:26:29Get your hats and tunics off.
00:26:36What, no M.O.?
00:26:37Come in, my little lambs.
00:26:40Now, look here.
00:26:41The M.O. hasn't turned up yet,
00:26:42so I'm just going to put you through your paces
00:26:44in case he does come.
00:26:45So for the time being, I'll be the M.O.
00:26:47Now, my men, open your mouth.
00:26:50Good gracious, what a garage.
00:26:52How do you feel?
00:26:53I feel like a silly ass standing here, I do, really.
00:26:56What's the complaint?
00:26:57Well, I have something from eucalyptus.
00:26:58Eucalyptus? Never heard of it.
00:27:00What effect does it have on you?
00:27:01Well, everything I eat seems to fly to me stomach.
00:27:03Oh, we'll soon stop that.
00:27:04How?
00:27:05Cut your rash off.
00:27:06Now, my men, what's your trouble?
00:27:07I can't run.
00:27:08Can't run.
00:27:09You soon will.
00:27:10A couple of number dines,
00:27:11you'll run for the rest of your life.
00:27:13Open your mouth.
00:27:14Hmm.
00:27:15Any insanity in your family?
00:27:16Yes, sir.
00:27:17My father was a sanitary inspector.
00:27:19Hmm.
00:27:20Is your mother still living?
00:27:21She was when I was born, sir.
00:27:23Hmm.
00:27:24What did you do before you joined up?
00:27:25I was a windmaker.
00:27:27A windmaker?
00:27:28What is a windmaker?
00:27:29He used to make wind in a balloon factory.
00:27:31That's enough of that.
00:27:32Turn round.
00:27:33Turn round.
00:27:35Turn round and bend down.
00:27:36Hmm.
00:27:37I see.
00:27:38Another dental case.
00:27:39All right.
00:27:40Now, my men, open your mouth.
00:27:42Good heavens, what do you feed with, a shovel?
00:27:45Aye.
00:27:46Wait for it.
00:27:47Wait for it.
00:27:48Take your vest off.
00:27:53Good gracious, what's the idea?
00:27:55Nothing, my sweetheart.
00:27:56What, six all together?
00:27:58No, one at a time.
00:27:59I only had seven when I got married.
00:28:01Why didn't you put the last one on?
00:28:02What, me missus?
00:28:03Oh, no.
00:28:04I keep her near me heart.
00:28:05Every time I bend forward, she pulls faces at me.
00:28:08See?
00:28:09Look.
00:28:12You know, you want dental treatment.
00:28:14Don't be silly.
00:28:15I've got no teeth.
00:28:16You soon will have.
00:28:17How do you eat?
00:28:18Just like a horse.
00:28:19I've heard you.
00:28:20Yes.
00:28:21You haven't had a bit of coffee yet, sir?
00:28:22It isn't necessary.
00:28:23You've got a fine pair of lungs.
00:28:24Thank you, sir.
00:28:25My wife tells me that.
00:28:26Oh, indeed.
00:28:27Hmm.
00:28:28What's the plaster for?
00:28:29Oh, a touch of lumbago.
00:28:30Lumbago?
00:28:31Have you ever had it before?
00:28:32No, always behind.
00:28:33Well, you'd better get that mucky thing off.
00:28:35I'm going to try and find the real M.O.
00:28:37Lads, peel him.
00:28:39No, they won't.
00:28:40I can peel him myself.
00:28:41Get away.
00:28:43Here, I'll help you.
00:28:44No, you're not.
00:28:45Yes, I will.
00:28:47Oh!
00:28:48Leave the blessed thing alone.
00:28:50I'll do it.
00:28:51I'm the most gentle.
00:28:52Yes, let him do it.
00:28:53Ah!
00:28:54Yes.
00:28:55Sorry to hurt the fellow.
00:28:56Get off me.
00:28:57Sergeant.
00:28:58Ooh.
00:28:59Ooh.
00:29:01Ooh.
00:29:11Come here with him.
00:29:15You have that.
00:29:21I'll get thee for this.
00:29:24Have you got it off?
00:29:25Yes, Sergeant.
00:29:26Eh, you needn't have bothered.
00:29:27The M.O.'s not coming back today.
00:29:29Let's try the dentist.
00:29:31Come on, the lot of you.
00:29:36I tell you, my dear, I don't like it.
00:29:38Oh, there may be nothing in it.
00:29:40There must be.
00:29:41Our girl's name's been coupled with this Trevor more than once.
00:29:43Well, we have nothing against you, have we?
00:29:45Not personally, perhaps, but I had better ideas for my daughter.
00:29:48I know to whom you refer.
00:29:50Captain Brown.
00:29:51Well, why not?
00:29:52He's a gentleman, personable, wealthy.
00:29:55What could be better?
00:29:56I don't see what we can do about it.
00:29:58After all, Jean's own feelings must be considered in the matter.
00:30:01Now, I'm going to let this Trevor business in the bud before it gets too serious.
00:30:04What do you propose to do?
00:30:05Only the other day, my brother phoned me,
00:30:07begging me to let them have Jean's services at the hospital at Wentworth.
00:30:10It seems they're very short-staffed.
00:30:12At the time, I said I didn't think so.
00:30:14But this Trevor business has precipitated matters.
00:30:17You mean?
00:30:18I'm going to persuade her to go to Wentworth.
00:30:20Then she may forget all about Trevor.
00:30:22It's the only thing to do. I can see that now.
00:30:24Hush, dear, I hear Jean coming now.
00:30:26Darling, promise you won't be too harsh.
00:30:28She is a little on the nervous side, you know.
00:30:30Now, just you leave it to me, dear.
00:30:35Hello, darling.
00:30:36Hello.
00:30:37I say, you do look solemn.
00:30:38Are you having a conference?
00:30:40Well, yes.
00:30:41Oh, subject being?
00:30:42You.
00:30:43And a very interesting topic, I should say.
00:30:45Now, Jean, I want to have a little chat with you.
00:30:48Shall we sit down?
00:30:49Daddy, you do sound serious.
00:30:51Well, I'm all attention.
00:30:52Right.
00:30:53Now, Jean, I've arranged for you to be transferred
00:30:55to Wentworth Hospital at once.
00:30:57Wentworth?
00:30:58Transferred at once?
00:30:59For whatever for?
00:31:00Now, just a moment, Jean.
00:31:02It's all so sudden.
00:31:03It's like this, my dear.
00:31:04Your uncle phoned me to say how terribly understaffed
00:31:06they are over there and asked for your help.
00:31:08And what did you say?
00:31:09What could I say?
00:31:11I simply said yes on your behalf.
00:31:13I flatter myself my daughter knows where her duty lies
00:31:15when a sudden call like this is made upon her,
00:31:17especially from her uncle.
00:31:19It won't be for long, dear.
00:31:20Oh, two or three weeks at the outside.
00:31:22But I don't quite understand.
00:31:23You say...
00:31:24Now, it's my wish, Jean, and your mother's.
00:31:27So let's call that settled.
00:31:34Mother?
00:31:37Mother, tell me, what does all this mean?
00:31:40Is there anything behind this very sudden request?
00:31:42Well, dear, I do know your uncle's asked for your help.
00:31:44And you know that your father has nothing on his mind
00:31:46except your welfare.
00:31:47So I don't suppose you'll oppose his wishes.
00:31:49I don't suppose I can.
00:31:51But it is perplexing all the same.
00:31:53Tell me, Jean, and I know you'll tell me the truth.
00:31:56Are you in love with Jack Trevor?
00:31:59Mother, honestly, I'm not quite sure.
00:32:01Sometimes he's everything to me.
00:32:03Oh, and I know he loves me.
00:32:05But at other times it's Captain Brown.
00:32:08Oh, I don't know. It's such a puzzle.
00:32:10Will you take my advice, dear?
00:32:12Do as your father suggests.
00:32:13Go to Wentworth and think things over there.
00:32:15And when you've thought and meditated
00:32:16and argued it out with yourself,
00:32:18and you've decided that you love Jack Trevor
00:32:19in the only way that matters...
00:32:20Yes?
00:32:21...then come home and leave me to deal with your father.
00:32:24Hmm?
00:32:25You're an angel.
00:32:32Come in.
00:32:35Private Trevor is here.
00:32:36Will you see him, sir?
00:32:37Trevor?
00:32:38Certainly. Bring him in.
00:32:39Private Trevor!
00:32:44You wish to see me, Clare?
00:32:45Yes, sir.
00:32:46I was wondering whether you'd heard anything
00:32:47about my commission, sir.
00:32:48Not yet.
00:32:49It may take weeks before it comes through.
00:32:51Why, what's the hurry?
00:32:52None, sir, except that I'm getting a bit browned off
00:32:54hanging about doing nothing.
00:32:55Oh, we'll soon settle that.
00:32:57I'll have a word with Captain Brown.
00:32:59By the way, Trevor, I believe you know my daughter, Jean.
00:33:01Yes, sir, rather well.
00:33:02As a matter of fact, I wanted to ask your permission
00:33:04to take her out to dinner tonight.
00:33:05What?
00:33:06That's quite impossible.
00:33:07She went away this morning.
00:33:09Went away?
00:33:10Well, she didn't tell me, sir.
00:33:12Oh, I've yet to learn that I must consult you
00:33:14about my domestic affairs.
00:33:15Oh, I'm sorry, sir. What I meant was...
00:33:16Now, reverting to this commission,
00:33:17I'll try to expedite matters.
00:33:18Of course, you realise that when it does come through,
00:33:20you'll be posted away from this unit.
00:33:22Yes, sir.
00:33:23All right, very good, Clare.
00:33:24Very good, sir.
00:33:31Won't you be waiting long?
00:33:32Oh, it's quite all right. There's no hurry.
00:33:34I'm not having my teas out.
00:33:36The officer will see to that.
00:33:37You can't take mine out. I haven't got any.
00:33:40No, but he can put some in.
00:33:42I'll bet you're a hottun.
00:33:44I beg your pardon?
00:33:45Where are you going tonight?
00:33:46How dare you!
00:33:49Where did you find this lot, Sergeant?
00:33:51I'm sorry, nurse.
00:33:52There wasn't room in the cemetery for them.
00:33:55Now, then, little one, you've got to have one out.
00:33:57Aye, but it's all right now.
00:33:58Oh, no, it isn't.
00:33:59I'm not having you off parade every day with toothache.
00:34:02Which one is it?
00:34:03That one.
00:34:04Ah!
00:34:05My word, the roots go a long way down.
00:34:07Well, have I got to take me boots off?
00:34:09No, they're using cocaine, not gas.
00:34:11But I think I'd better fetch the dynamite.
00:34:13Whatever for?
00:34:14They'll have to blast it out.
00:34:16Well, they needn't bother.
00:34:17I've been blasting all day.
00:34:19Now, you're all right.
00:34:20It won't hurt... much.
00:34:22Well, what have I to do?
00:34:23Hold your breath.
00:34:24Well, what'll happen if I hold me breath too long?
00:34:27Oh, you'll just pass out.
00:34:29Go on, get back in the queue.
00:34:35Which are the first two, Sergeant?
00:34:36Well, they're all important, sir.
00:34:37Why so important?
00:34:38Well, apart from anything else, they're musicians,
00:34:40members of our new band.
00:34:41Oh, I see.
00:34:42When they've had their teeth attended to,
00:34:43they'll play better.
00:34:44Well, I hope they can play better than they look.
00:34:46Now, you, and you, into those chairs.
00:34:53I've never been in a place like this in my life.
00:34:55I don't like the idea.
00:34:56I'll tell you the truth.
00:34:57No, I don't want to have my mouth.
00:34:58No, I don't want to have my mouth.
00:35:00Sit down.
00:35:01What's the matter with you?
00:35:02Open your mouth.
00:35:03No, I don't want to have my mouth.
00:35:04Sit down.
00:35:05Get out.
00:35:06Come on.
00:35:07Come on, dear.
00:35:08Come on, come on.
00:35:09Get up, get up.
00:35:10Mind me.
00:35:11Mind what?
00:35:12Mind me trousers.
00:35:13Come on, get up now.
00:35:14Please, sir.
00:35:15What is it?
00:35:16I want to leave the room.
00:35:17What for?
00:35:18I don't know.
00:35:19Get back here.
00:35:20Come on, now.
00:35:21What are you doing?
00:35:22Get back here.
00:35:23Move it.
00:35:24Now, stand back.
00:35:25Lie down.
00:35:26Open your mouth.
00:35:27Come on.
00:35:28Wider.
00:35:29Ah, yes, yes.
00:35:30Just as I thought.
00:35:31Deep, deep down embedded in the gum,
00:35:33there's a stump of a tooth.
00:35:35It'll have to come out.
00:35:37Never.
00:35:38Yes.
00:35:40Come here, Tiny.
00:35:41Let's have a look at your teeth.
00:35:42They're all right.
00:35:43You'd better go and get your hair cut.
00:35:47Oh.
00:35:48So you're swinging the lid, are you?
00:35:50I'm not.
00:35:51We'll soon see about that.
00:35:52Come on.
00:35:53Open your mouth.
00:35:54Oh.
00:35:55See, it won't open.
00:35:56You're trying to be funny, are you?
00:35:58Very well.
00:35:59I'll give you gas.
00:36:00Gas?
00:36:01Oh.
00:36:02Peter, open the gate.
00:36:03I'm coming up.
00:36:05I said open up now.
00:36:06Come back, will you?
00:36:08What are you doing?
00:36:09Hold that a minute.
00:36:11Oh.
00:36:12Hello, hello.
00:36:13Is that the hospital?
00:36:14I'm a bed ready.
00:36:15I'll be over in a minute.
00:36:16Now, what are you doing?
00:36:17Now, come on.
00:36:18Open your mouth.
00:36:19Open your mouth.
00:36:20Open.
00:36:21Wider.
00:36:22Aye.
00:36:23Oh, I see.
00:36:24Just on top of the stump, there's a bit of gold.
00:36:25Gold?
00:36:26That's my blinking collar stone.
00:36:27Now, get back, will you?
00:36:29Open your mouth again.
00:36:30I've made a mistake.
00:36:32It's not a stump after all.
00:36:34It's a bit of dirt.
00:36:35Dirt?
00:36:36Oh, so it is.
00:36:37What are you doing?
00:36:38Stop that.
00:36:39Open your mouth again.
00:36:40Open it.
00:36:41Ah, I can see what I'll have to do with you.
00:36:42I'll fix you up with a new set.
00:36:44I'd better take an impression now.
00:36:46Impression?
00:36:47Oh.
00:36:49I'm too busy to attend to you today.
00:36:51Get out.
00:36:52It's your turn next.
00:36:53Oh, I'm not feeling very well.
00:36:55Well, what's the matter with you?
00:36:56I think I'm going to be...
00:36:58Get out.
00:37:00Now, don't touch.
00:37:02Now, look, I'm just going to take...
00:37:03It's all right.
00:37:04What are you doing?
00:37:05I'll fix myself up.
00:37:06You can't have those.
00:37:07Take the...
00:37:08Ah!
00:37:09These will do for me.
00:37:10They will not.
00:37:11They belong to another man.
00:37:12He died in this chair this morning.
00:37:14What?
00:37:15Oh.
00:37:16Oh, dear.
00:37:17What are you...
00:37:18I hope they don't bite you.
00:37:19Bless her and sit back, will you?
00:37:24Open your mouth.
00:37:26Open.
00:37:27Now, shut.
00:37:28Oh.
00:37:29Oh.
00:37:30Oh.
00:37:31Now, shut.
00:37:32Keep it down.
00:37:33I'll be back in a minute.
00:37:38Now, I want you to look after your teeth, because they are marvellous.
00:37:42Heavens above, it's a tin whistle.
00:37:52Now, now, take it easy.
00:37:53Take it easy.
00:37:58Heavens above, it's half of a frying pan.
00:38:00You did that on purpose.
00:38:01Did what on purpose?
00:38:02You stretched it.
00:38:03Stretched what?
00:38:04My mouth, like that.
00:38:05It doesn't need stretching.
00:38:06Oh, you're on it again, are you?
00:38:07What?
00:38:08I'll get thee for this.
00:38:09You what?
00:38:10Get off me foot.
00:38:11What's all this noise about?
00:38:12I don't know.
00:38:13Yes, you do.
00:38:14I'll knock your block off.
00:38:15What, like to see you try?
00:38:16You ignoramitous.
00:38:17Get out of here, you.
00:38:18Come on, get out of here.
00:38:19Come on.
00:38:20Move.
00:38:21Move.
00:38:22Come on.
00:38:23Move.
00:38:24Move.
00:38:25Move.
00:38:26Move.
00:38:27Move.
00:38:28Move.
00:38:30Move.
00:38:31Move.
00:38:32Move.
00:38:33Move.
00:38:34Move.
00:38:35Move.
00:38:36Move.
00:38:37Move.
00:38:38Move.
00:38:39Move.
00:38:40Move.
00:38:41Move.
00:38:42Move.
00:38:43Move.
00:38:44Move.
00:38:45Move.
00:38:46Move.
00:38:47Move.
00:38:48Move.
00:38:49Move.
00:38:50Move.
00:38:51Move.
00:38:52Move.
00:38:53Excuse me, Sergeant, can I have a word with you?
00:38:55What's it about?
00:38:56It's very important.
00:38:57Well, I'm busy now.
00:38:58All right.
00:38:59Well, it's about Jean Rivers, Sergeant.
00:39:00I just had a letter from her.
00:39:01I must see her.
00:39:02And what do you want me to do?
00:39:03Well, you can get me a pass.
00:39:04Come on, Sergeant, get me one right now.
00:39:05On what grounds?
00:39:06Oh, compassionate.
00:39:07Anything you like, as long as I get one.
00:39:09Listen, I'd like to help you.
00:39:10You know that perfectly well.
00:39:11But I cannot get you a pass this time.
00:39:13Why not?
00:39:14Well, you had one last week.
00:39:15There were complaints.
00:39:16Everybody said you were getting too many.
00:39:17Oh, who said that?
00:39:18Well, in particular, Captain Brown.
00:39:20Oh, now listen, Sergeant, just get me this one, and I promise I'll never ask you again.
00:39:23Now listen, you know I'd do anything for you, but this time it's impossible.
00:39:26I must see Jean.
00:39:27She's so unhappy.
00:39:28It's very important.
00:39:29Well, I'm afraid you're unlucky.
00:39:30I tell you, I must see her, and I'm going to.
00:39:32Don't be a fool.
00:39:33I don't care.
00:39:34By golly, you've got it bad.
00:39:35You're like a broody hen.
00:39:36Haven't you ever been in love?
00:39:38Oh, don't remind me.
00:39:39I was as bad as any of you.
00:39:41I used to kiss my girl's shadow on the wall.
00:39:43That accounts for the turn-up.
00:39:45Who did that?
00:39:47Less noise over there.
00:39:49You, you know nought about love yet.
00:39:51Why, before I married, I advertised for a wife.
00:39:53Oh?
00:39:54And I got over 400 replies, all from married men, saying I could have theirs.
00:39:59Who did that?
00:40:00Sorry, sir.
00:40:01It dropped out.
00:40:02Dropped out?
00:40:03You'll drop out in a minute.
00:40:04Mind you, the wife and I, we agree very well.
00:40:06Oh, well, there you are.
00:40:07She agrees with everything I say.
00:40:09You want to forget about this love business.
00:40:11Not me.
00:40:12You ought, and back horses instead.
00:40:13You get more winners.
00:40:15Love?
00:40:16Love?
00:40:17What is love?
00:40:18Who did that?
00:40:19It went off itself.
00:40:20And so will you in a minute.
00:40:22Well, it's a stingy wind that shows nobody's garters.
00:40:24Now, I've got to get on with this band practice.
00:40:26For the last time, Sergeant, can I have a pass?
00:40:28What's the use, Trevor?
00:40:29You know it can't be done.
00:40:31That's final.
00:40:32Well, we'll see.
00:40:34Come on, lads.
00:40:35Let's get cracking with this rehearsal.
00:40:40Listen, I've told the adjutant we've got a great military band.
00:40:43All first-class musicians, I hope.
00:40:45And he wants us to parade at the weekend.
00:40:47Leave it to us.
00:40:48We'll show him.
00:40:49Have you ever played in a band?
00:40:50Not yet.
00:40:51Then you're just the fellow we want.
00:40:53Now, as this is our first practice, we haven't played together before,
00:40:56we'll just try it out and see how it sounds.
00:41:00Not yet, not yet, you blithering idiot.
00:41:02I suppose you all know Stars and Stripes?
00:41:04Yes, Sergeant.
00:41:05All right, then we'll try it.
00:41:21Skrrt, skrrt, skrrt, skrrt, skrrt, skrrt, skrrt, skrrt, skrrt, skrrt, skrrt, skrrt, skrrt, skrrt.
00:41:35For a first time, that was very, very good.
00:41:39Now we'll try the second movement.
00:41:51Skrrt, skrrt, skrrt, skrrt, skrrt, skrrt, skrrt, skrrt, skrrt, skrrt, skrrt, skrrt, skrrt.
00:42:13Nay, nay, we're not playing Old Man River.
00:42:15I think I played a wrong note in that last bar.
00:42:18A wrong note? You've never played a right one yet.
00:42:20right one yet? I suggest we play Cock of the North. Cock of the North? You couldn't play
00:42:24the Hen's March to the Mookheap. Get back to your place. Thank you. Now then, we're going to try the
00:42:28third movement.
00:42:34Eee, that were proper champions. And now we'll play Rachmaninoff's Prelude in C-sharp minor.
00:42:39Oh no you don't, Sergeant. Yes, sir. That terrible noise. Noise? That's our new band, sir. You mean
00:42:44it was your new band? Scrap them. No, sir. Give them time. Time? By God, I give them 10 years. Scrap
00:42:50them, I tell you. But the instruments. We've only just bought them. What are we going to do with
00:42:54them, sir? Pardon? I said, what are we going to do with the instruments? Well, I could tell you.
00:43:00I know what you mean, sir. But it's going to be very painful.
00:43:14Where are you going, chum? Wentworth, driver. So am I. Jump in.
00:43:44They're getting too near to be pleasant. That's one of our nurses. Yes, it sounds like her.
00:43:56I think that's near enough. Hello? Clear the ward at once, nurse. There's a time bomb dropped in the hospital ground.
00:44:06Right. Come along, boys. Quickly.
00:44:23Wait. Where do you think you're going? I'm going to Wentworth Hospital over there. You're not.
00:44:27Why not? Who'll stop me? I'll stop you. Now, don't be foolish, chum. Take my advice and get away as
00:44:31quick as you can. You see that crater over there? Yes. Well, the Germans have just dropped another
00:44:35bomb in it. It hasn't exploded yet. We've just reported it. Hasn't exploded? Well, it may be a time bomb.
00:44:39Why, Blackley, you get out of it quick. Get out of it quick? Good God, my girls are in that hospital.
00:44:45Don't do that, I tell you. Let me go. That thing will go off at any minute, you young idiot. Let me go, you bastard scoundrel.
00:45:35Here you are. That bomb won't trouble you anymore. Forget it. Where are you stationed, chum? Somewhere in camp.
00:45:53There's a young daredevil, if you like. That's the smartest thing I've ever seen. He took a hell
00:45:58of a risk, you know. You made a time bomb drop around here, I believe. Oh, it's all right now, sir.
00:46:02What do you mean, it's all right? Well, here's the mechanism, sir. Do you know, in another quarter
00:46:06of an hour, this would have caused a tremendous amount of damage. There wouldn't have been much
00:46:09left of that hospital over there. How did you come to get this? Well, a soldier was passing this way
00:46:14and I stopped him. It was a big argument and then he pushed me on one side and brought that back.
00:46:17Who is he? Did you get his name and address? No, sir, he just cleared out. Well, that's extraordinary.
00:46:21Whoever he is, he's certainly very clever. He looks a smart young fellow, sir. He certainly is very
00:46:25smart. Well, if he comes back, I'll get to know who he is, sir. Yes, you must. Come on, boys, there's not
00:46:29much for us to do here. Good night. Good night, sir.
00:46:33Here we are. How much will you have? Keep me on that. Oh, you are a spendthrift.
00:46:37Doubles on that. Doubles on that one. And a penny on that, fine. Doubles on that. And a penny on that.
00:46:41Don't you, don't you. Now, what do you want? I'll leave you that. You'll leave me this one? Yes.
00:46:49Well, never mind. You can't have two aces for it.
00:46:53Here we are. Come on, get back. Doubles on that one. Another keep me on that. Oh, this game's too big for me.
00:46:58Oh, don't stop. A penny on that. And a penny on that. Doubles on that. And a penny on that. I'll leave you that. Leave me this one.
00:47:09Good boy, old boy. Sorry, lads. Sorry, lads. I've got a book of money.
00:47:12Well, never. You can't keep it up all night. What are you smoking? Chippers.
00:47:18Here, come on, let's have a do. Come on. Doubles on that one. A penny on that.
00:47:21Doubles on that. Here, pay on. I'll have me that. You will not. I'll have this.
00:47:27You'll have that one. I'll put the lot in this. There we are. Half a ball. And that. Yes. Give us some money, lads.
00:47:34Here, here. Here, here to do. We're skidding. Well, I was on the fence. Are you all set now?
00:47:43Wait a bit. Wait a bit. What do you mean, wait a bit? Keep thy hands from picking and stealing.
00:47:47Stealing me? Stealing me? What are you talking about?
00:47:49Oh, hey, hey.
00:47:54Slight mistake, that's all. Slight mistake, boy. Mistake. Mistake. Get out of here.
00:48:02You, you'll go to a big burning fire. Oh, yes. Yes, you're a thief. Who's a thief? You are.
00:48:06I'll tell you a little from them. Oh, yes. Oh, yes. Oh, yes. Oh, I think you're talking about me now.
00:48:13That's me. I'll knock that off for you.
00:48:16Leave it on, I'll knock it off.
00:48:18Oh, I'm just in the mood.
00:48:20These are my food.
00:48:22Come on, put them on.
00:48:24Oh, it's like that, is it? No, I don't think so.
00:48:27Now, let that be a lesson, see?
00:48:29I really don't.
00:48:30Well, have I had enough yet?
00:48:32Come on, put them on.
00:48:43Oh, oh, oh, oh!
00:48:55I'll do the lotto in.
00:49:01Gary, where are you? Come amongst me.
00:49:08I'll do the lotto in.
00:49:11Ah! I'll fight the whole camp.
00:49:19Oh, Corporal, have you heard anything about Trevor?
00:49:21No, Sarge.
00:49:22Are you sure?
00:49:23Quite sure. You seem very anxious about this Trevor, Sarge.
00:49:25I am.
00:49:26Well, there's nothing new in a man jumping at it now and again.
00:49:28No, but Trevor, now the fat will be in the fire.
00:49:32I wonder where he is.
00:49:35Jean, there's a young man in uniform outside inquiring for you.
00:49:38Did he say who he was?
00:49:39Yes, his name's Trevor, Jack Trevor.
00:49:41Jack Trevor?
00:49:42Why, do you know him?
00:49:43I should say I do.
00:49:44Well, go along and see him.
00:49:46I'll carry on here till you get back, but don't be too long.
00:49:48Thank you, nurse. I'll only be a few minutes.
00:50:00Jack!
00:50:01Jean!
00:50:02I'm so pleased to see you. Did you get my letter?
00:50:04Yes, that's what brought me here, whatever's the matter.
00:50:06Why, I was so miserable.
00:50:07Yes, it sounded like it.
00:50:08Why on earth did you come here? That's what I want to know.
00:50:10Well, I had no option. It was Daddy's request.
00:50:13Tell me, Jean, you didn't run away from me, did you?
00:50:15Of course not, Jack.
00:50:16You know Daddy wished me to come here.
00:50:18And then when Mother and I were alone, she asked me point blank whether I loved you or not.
00:50:22And what did you say?
00:50:23I said I wasn't quite sure.
00:50:25I told you at the dance how much I loved you, and I asked you if you loved me too.
00:50:29Yes, and I said I didn't know, just as I told Mother.
00:50:32And then she...
00:50:33Go on.
00:50:34Well, she persuaded me to come here and think things over.
00:50:37And have you done?
00:50:38Yes, Jack, I have. That's why I wrote you that letter.
00:50:47You mean that...
00:50:49Yes, dear, I do love you.
00:50:54Oh, Jack, and to think I might never have seen you again.
00:50:57Why? How do you mean?
00:50:58Well, in the blitz last night, a time bomb was dropped in that crater over there.
00:51:02And if it hadn't been for some brave soldier putting it out of action, we might have all been killed.
00:51:06I expect he just felt like it, that's all.
00:51:08Oh, splendid of him.
00:51:09And he slipped away without anybody getting his name or thanking him, and we don't know who it was.
00:51:13Oh, that's too bad.
00:51:14It's such a shame. A brave man like that ought to be honored.
00:51:17He's certainly got a champion in you, anyway.
00:51:19I should think so, indeed. I could hug him.
00:51:21If I come across him, I'll bring him to you.
00:51:23You must, and I'll kiss him.
00:51:24I'll remember that.
00:51:25Oh, and you won't be jealous?
00:51:27I'll try not to be.
00:51:28Jack, I must go now. I promised Nurse I'd only be a few minutes.
00:51:33Well, what about tonight?
00:51:34Oh, you're lucky it's my night off.
00:51:35Oh, that's grand. Where shall we go?
00:51:37Anywhere you say.
00:51:38Okay, then I'll meet you here at this enchanted spot at 6.30, and be punctual.
00:51:42Aren't I always punctual?
00:51:43Oh, you're not so bad for a girl.
00:51:44Now, don't forget about my soldier hero.
00:51:46I won't forget. I may even bring him with me.
00:51:49I must go now, Jack. Goodbye.
00:51:53Goodbye, dear. See you tonight.
00:52:03Hey, just a minute, chum.
00:52:07Smart soldier, eh?
00:52:09Where's your respirator?
00:52:10Well, what have you done with it?
00:52:11Oh, sorry, Corporal. I must have lost it. I mean, mislaid it last night.
00:52:14Oh, on the spree, were you?
00:52:16Oh, no, Corporal.
00:52:17Well, where did you stay last night?
00:52:18Red Lion Hotel.
00:52:19Well, you may have left it there.
00:52:20Well, I may have done, but it's hardly likely.
00:52:21Well, you'd better go and find out, chum.
00:52:22All right, Corporal.
00:52:23Just a second. You're on leave, aren't you?
00:52:25Yes.
00:52:26Oh, I'd better see your pass.
00:52:27Oh, that's all right.
00:52:28Just a minute.
00:52:29We want to see your pass.
00:52:30As a matter of fact, I haven't got one.
00:52:31Oh, I see. On leave without a pass.
00:52:34French leave, eh?
00:52:36You know our duty as well as we do.
00:52:38You'll have to come along with us.
00:52:39But I've got to meet someone tonight.
00:52:40That's a pity, that is.
00:52:41Got yourself mixed up with a bird, have you?
00:52:43Don't you talk to me like that, or I'll...
00:52:44That's enough.
00:52:45Don't you lay your hands on me.
00:52:46You're only making it worse for yourself, you know.
00:52:47Well, be careful what you say, that's all.
00:52:48Now, come along. You come along with us.
00:52:50Corporal, can you do me a favor?
00:52:52You don't behave the right way to ask for favor.
00:52:54I'm sorry, Corporal.
00:52:55Corporal, can you do me a favor?
00:52:57You don't behave the right way to ask for favors.
00:52:59I'm sorry, I didn't want to be awkward,
00:53:01but do let me phone my girl
00:53:02and tell her I shan't be able to keep the appointment tonight.
00:53:04Don't you make an appointment
00:53:05when you're not supposed to be on leave?
00:53:07Well, I thought I might have been lucky.
00:53:08That's just too bad.
00:53:09All right, telephone your girl.
00:53:11Tell her there's an appointment for her.
00:53:12In you go.
00:53:13Going to tell her you're under arrest?
00:53:15Not likely.
00:53:19A bit touchy when you mentioned his bird, wasn't he?
00:53:21Aye, wasn't he just.
00:53:22I'll bet he's not a bad sort of a bloke, though.
00:53:24Some of them don't half take liberties.
00:53:26They forget they're in the army.
00:53:27Well, you know how it is.
00:53:29Love.
00:53:30When you've got it, you don't want it.
00:53:32When you've had it, you wonder why.
00:53:39Come on, hurry up.
00:53:49Hello?
00:53:50No, I'm sorry, the C.I.'s away today.
00:53:52This is the adjutant speaking.
00:53:54What name did you say?
00:53:57Oh, yes, he's one of our men, all right.
00:53:59Yes, I'm glad you've got him.
00:54:02All right, I'll send the escort along first thing in the morning.
00:54:05Yes, you're quite right, they are a nuisance.
00:54:09Yes, thanks very much.
00:54:10Goodbye.
00:54:12Come in.
00:54:15I've come to report, sir, the new draft have arrived.
00:54:17Oh, are they all fixed up?
00:54:18Yes, sir.
00:54:19Ah, good.
00:54:20Oh, by the way, Sergeant, you're just the man I want.
00:54:21I've had news of Trevor.
00:54:22Where is he, sir?
00:54:23He's at Wentworth.
00:54:24Just what I expected.
00:54:25Well, what do you mean?
00:54:26Oh, nothing.
00:54:27He's at the Wentworth police station awaiting an escort.
00:54:29Oh, by the way, you come from Wentworth, don't you?
00:54:32Yes, sir.
00:54:33Well, then I don't suppose you'd object to a night at home, would you?
00:54:35Not me, sir.
00:54:36No, somehow I thought you wouldn't.
00:54:37All right, then, you get a voucher and draw your iron rations and catch the first train.
00:54:39Thank you, sir.
00:54:40You can pick up Trevor first thing in the morning.
00:54:42You should be back by midday.
00:54:43Who will you take with you?
00:54:44What about Private Randall, sir?
00:54:46Randall? The man's a lunatic.
00:54:47I know that, sir, but he's good company.
00:54:49All right, then, take him with you.
00:54:50The change will do him good.
00:54:51He lives next door to me.
00:54:53I know his wife will be awfully pleased to see him.
00:54:56Well, then, by all means, take him.
00:54:57Thank you, sir.
00:55:17Whoa!
00:55:18Well, then, how much is that?
00:55:19Two pounds, sir.
00:55:20Two pounds.
00:55:21Aye, just a minute, Rothschild.
00:55:22We've got to pool our resources.
00:55:23What, again?
00:55:24Aye, let's have some dough.
00:55:25Here.
00:55:26Aye.
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01:03:01Mind your things over there. Be careful.
01:03:04Go on, put the mallet with you.
01:03:07Have you gone mad?
01:03:09Don't be a peasant.
01:03:11Be careful!
01:03:15Your toe. Did you hurt your toe?
01:03:17Hurt my toe? I'll break my neck for the evil.
01:03:19Are you glad to see me?
01:03:21Bye.
01:03:22Mind the bed.
01:03:23Bye. I'll sleep tonight.
01:03:28I wish I had my teeth in.
01:03:30What for?
01:03:30I'd like to bite you.
01:03:32Give us a kiss, love.
01:03:38What a devil I was.
01:03:44I can help myself, that's all.
01:03:45You're smothering me, I can't breathe.
01:03:47Oh, you idiot!
01:03:51Oh, you fool!
01:03:57Mummy, can I have a drink of water?
01:03:59Yes, darling, of course you can.
01:04:02Thirsty?
01:04:04Now, be a good boy and go to sleep.
01:04:06Good night, sweet. Good night.
01:04:14Well, I'm ready for bed, look.
01:04:24What are you looking for?
01:04:26Birdlets.
01:04:27Birdlets?
01:04:28Well, you never know, you know.
01:04:29I'll do my exercise before I get in, shall I?
01:04:36You're not going to sleep, are you?
01:04:40Can I have a drink of water?
01:04:41Yes, you can.
01:04:42Well, have one, now, will you?
01:04:45Can I have some bread and jam?
01:04:47No, go to bed. Please, Mummy.
01:04:49Oh, get out!
01:04:53A dumb nuisance.
01:04:59Ah, whoosh!
01:05:04You've left the light on.
01:05:06Mummy, the sirens have gone.
01:05:08The sirens? I never heard them, did you?
01:05:10No, I didn't.
01:05:11Oh, you wouldn't, the noise you've been making.
01:05:13But they have, Mummy.
01:05:14Well, go and get dressed at once, darling.
01:05:16Come on, do you hear? The sirens have gone.
01:05:18Are they coming back? Where have they gone to?
01:05:19Oh, you idiot!
01:05:21Well, they'll stay there and be born to you.
01:05:25Hey, what are you doing with those curtains?
01:05:26Leave the damn thing alone!
01:05:27Women will mess everything up.
01:05:33Making such a fuss just because there's a rain on.
01:05:41Put that light out!
01:05:43Get me out of here!
01:05:45Get me out!
01:05:48I can hear him. He's over.
01:05:54Oh, where's my trousers?
01:05:56Mrs, where are you? Don't leave me.
01:05:58I'm getting dressed, you fool.
01:06:00Oh, have you got my shirt on?
01:06:03I've lost me trousers.
01:06:05I had them yesterday. I know I had.
01:06:08Oh, don't get excited, woman.
01:06:10Why can't you be calm like me?
01:06:12Oh, shut up, will you?
01:06:13Don't shout till you hear.
01:06:15Not him. He's over again.
01:06:17I can hear him.
01:06:18What?
01:06:20Come on, darling. Never mind your father.
01:06:24Hello!
01:06:25Somebody come!
01:06:27What's the idea?
01:06:28Go away. We don't want any.
01:06:29What's the matter?
01:06:30Call next week.
01:06:31Where are you going?
01:06:32Where is it?
01:06:33Where's what?
01:06:34The shelter.
01:06:35What do you want the shelter for?
01:06:36It's gone.
01:06:37What's gone?
01:06:38The sign is gone.
01:06:39Go back to bed. That was the all clear.
01:06:42The what?
01:06:43That was the all clear.
01:06:48The all clear.
01:06:50The all clear.
01:06:51The all clear.
01:06:52Yes.
01:06:54I'll get thee for this.
01:07:03Sign for the prisoner, Sergeant.
01:07:09Well, Sammy, you got yourself into a nice mess, haven't you?
01:07:11What did I tell you?
01:07:12Well, it was worth it.
01:07:13I saw Jean and she's safe, so I don't care what happens now.
01:07:15When are you going to do it again, Jack?
01:07:17I can do it another night at home.
01:07:18Oh, you're a damn nuisance.
01:07:19I'm not taking you with me again.
01:07:20It's no to do with you.
01:07:21Oh, yes it is.
01:07:22I had to use my influence with the adjutant to get you away with me.
01:07:25Yes, he said you were crackers.
01:07:26He did?
01:07:27Yes.
01:07:28What did you say?
01:07:29I said I know he is, but he's harmless.
01:07:30Oh, what a pal.
01:07:31Now, come on, Trevor.
01:07:32Let's be getting back.
01:07:33OK, Sergeant.
01:07:34We don't want to miss this train.
01:07:35Who doesn't?
01:07:36You speak for yourself.
01:07:37Listen, will you do me a favor?
01:07:38When the train's coming in, fall under it.
01:07:41Go on.
01:07:43Hi, Bill.
01:07:44Oh, what do you want?
01:07:45I found a gas mask.
01:07:46Give it here.
01:07:47Let's have a look at it.
01:07:48It's a service mask, too.
01:07:49How the devil did he get down there?
01:07:50It's a mystery to me, mate.
01:07:51Some poor bloke could get into trouble over this.
01:07:52You're right.
01:07:53If I was you, I'd report that straight away.
01:07:54Yeah, I think I will, Joe.
01:07:55All right, you carry on.
01:07:56I'll be back in a minute.
01:07:57I'll be back in a minute.
01:07:58I'll be back in a minute.
01:07:59I'll be back in a minute.
01:08:00I'll be back in a minute.
01:08:01I'll be back in a minute.
01:08:02I'll be back in a minute.
01:08:03I'll be back in a minute.
01:08:04I'll be back in a minute.
01:08:06I'll be back in a minute.
01:08:07I'll be back in a minute.
01:08:08I'll be back in a minute.
01:08:09I'll be back in a minute.
01:08:10I'll be back in a minute.
01:08:11I'll be back in a minute.
01:08:12I'll be back in a minute.
01:08:13I'll be back in a minute.
01:08:14I'll be back in a minute.
01:08:15I'll be back in a minute.
01:08:16I'll be back in a minute.
01:08:17I'll be back in a minute.
01:08:18I'll be back in a minute.
01:08:19I'll be back in a minute.
01:08:20I'll be back in a minute.
01:08:21I'll be back in a minute.
01:08:22I'll be back in a minute.
01:08:23I'll be back in a minute.
01:08:24I'll be back in a minute.
01:08:25I'll be back in a minute.
01:08:26I'll be back in a minute.
01:08:27I'll be back in a minute.
01:08:28I'll be back in a minute.
01:08:56As I have already pointed out, it is promptness and decision that counts.
01:09:00And how courageously was this demonstrated by Private Jack Trevor,
01:09:04now Second Lieutenant Trevor,
01:09:06with the time bomb lodged in the grounds at Wentworth Hospital.
01:09:10In face of the events in which Trevor has played such an important part,
01:09:14I have no option but to gracefully withdraw from a certain attitude of mine
01:09:18which I allow to prejudice me against his character.
01:09:21And it is with great pleasure
01:09:23I now formally announce his engagement to my daughter, Jean.
01:09:27And I wish them every success and happiness.
01:09:31Hooray!
01:09:33Hooray!
01:09:34Hooray!
01:09:35Hooray!
01:09:36Hooray!
01:09:37And now we must carry on with the entertainment.
01:09:39The next item on the program is a sketch entitled
01:09:43Wanted a Housekeeper,
01:09:45played by two well-known members of our camp.
01:09:48Hey, don't mess about with these letters. They're important.
01:10:05I wouldn't touch them with a pole.
01:10:07I know what they are.
01:10:08They're answers to your advertisement.
01:10:10Oh, so you've read my advert, have you?
01:10:12Read it? Why, everybody's talking about it.
01:10:14I've got it off by heart.
01:10:16Wanted housekeeper.
01:10:18With view to matrimony.
01:10:19Must be young and vivacious.
01:10:21Widow not objected to.
01:10:23Applied box 13.
01:10:25You ought to be ashamed of yourself.
01:10:27Now, keep a simple tongue in your head, will you?
01:10:29Just if I cared.
01:10:30I'm glad I gave my notice in to leave on Saturday.
01:10:33You advertising for a wife at your time of life?
01:10:36Well, why not?
01:10:37Why not, you old bluebeard?
01:10:39What?
01:10:40You've had four wives already.
01:10:41I have that.
01:10:43If the Lord keeps providing them, I'll keep marrying them.
01:10:48That's only her.
01:10:49That's the one I picked.
01:10:51She says she's young and experienced.
01:10:53Don't stand there like a dying duck.
01:10:55Let her in.
01:10:57She says she's a lovely figure.
01:10:59That's what I'm after.
01:11:07What a dump.
01:11:09Why, if it isn't old Ma.
01:11:14Good afternoon.
01:11:15How do to.
01:11:16Oh, what a boiling piece.
01:11:19We'll have a pint just enough.
01:11:21May I offer you a seat?
01:11:24Park it there.
01:11:25It's really too good of you.
01:11:29I'll bet you're a hotten.
01:11:31I'm afraid I don't understand what you mean.
01:11:33Well, the other day you said you were young and vivacious.
01:11:36Well, am I not?
01:11:37I'd like to see your vivacity.
01:11:39I dare say you would, but not here.
01:11:41Why not?
01:11:42Well, I've come here for an interview, not an operation.
01:11:45I like a woman with a bit of spirit.
01:11:47How old are you?
01:11:48That's no to do with it.
01:11:49A man's as old as he feels.
01:11:51Well, you're feeling pretty well.
01:11:53I like you.
01:11:54Do you?
01:11:55Could I offer you a drop of wine?
01:11:57No, no.
01:11:58So you'd tempt the fair maiden with strong drink.
01:12:00Well, just a small one.
01:12:02That's all you're getting.
01:12:03I'm saving this for the wedding.
01:12:04The wedding?
01:12:05Whose wedding?
01:12:06Ours, glory.
01:12:07Oh, Sebastian.
01:12:09What?
01:12:13Here's to your bright eyes.
01:12:15I'm sorry there's not enough for the evening.
01:12:17Oh, I wasn't particular.
01:12:19I noticed there was a dead fly in it.
01:12:21What?
01:12:25Oh, excuse me.
01:12:27Now to business.
01:12:28I want to get to the point at once.
01:12:30I imagine that, but I haven't said yes, Sebastian.
01:12:33Oh, but you will.
01:12:35You're a real caveman.
01:12:36I can see that.
01:12:37I am at all.
01:12:38Now, listen, glory.
01:12:39I always like my honeymoons at home.
01:12:42Oh, then you've been married before.
01:12:44Oh, yes.
01:12:45Four times.
01:12:46Four times?
01:12:47Then you're a foursome.
01:12:48Aye.
01:12:49They're all bunkered across the way in the old churchyard there.
01:12:52Have you been married?
01:12:53Five times.
01:12:54Oh, well, you know all about it.
01:12:56Have you any children?
01:12:57No, I never could bear children.
01:12:59What?
01:13:00Oh, that's no good to me.
01:13:02Give us a kiss.
01:13:03No, no.
01:13:04Oh, go on.
01:13:05No, no, no.
01:13:06I shall thrash you.
01:13:07No, no.
01:13:18Ooh!
01:13:19What's that for?
01:13:20Oh, a thousand pardons.
01:13:21I'm sure you'll excuse a poor, weak woman.
01:13:23Weak woman?
01:13:24You'd have kicked me teeth out.
01:13:26Won't you sit beside me?
01:13:28Ah, now you're talking.
01:13:31Did I tell you that story?
01:13:33Story?
01:13:34I don't want to hear it.
01:13:35What's it about?
01:13:36Oh, it's about a honeymoon couple.
01:13:38Oh, I'm sorry.
01:13:39I beg your pardon.
01:13:40Oh, elastic, eh?
01:13:42And on the first night...
01:13:44Ooh!
01:13:45What's that for?
01:13:46I've forgotten the story now.
01:13:47It doesn't matter.
01:13:48I've heard it dozens of times before.
01:13:50Oh, yes.
01:13:51What do you think of me, Gloria?
01:13:52I think you're a dirty old man.
01:13:54What?
01:13:55I say I think you're a flirty old man.
01:13:57Oh, well, it's you.
01:13:58You've got me.
01:13:59I can't help myself.
01:14:00Eh, by heck.
01:14:01I've had four wives.
01:14:03I could go on up with thee, Gloria.
01:14:06Give me a kiss.
01:14:07No, no.
01:14:08Oh, yes.
01:14:09Go on.
01:14:10No, no.
01:14:11Oh, glory.
01:14:12I could tear lumps off thee.
01:14:14I'm as weak as a weasel.
01:14:18Will you marry me?
01:14:19No.
01:14:20Oh, yes.
01:14:21No.
01:14:22Oh, go on.
01:14:23No.
01:14:24I've fallen for you.
01:14:26I'll get thee for this.
01:14:29I'll get thee for this.
01:14:43And now, ladies and gentlemen,
01:14:44we have pleasure in presenting a scene
01:14:46that's entitled,
01:14:47All Aboard For Victory.
01:14:48I hope you like it.
01:14:59you