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Short filmTranscript
00:00Senior year, the culmination of all my careful planning.
00:04Perfect grades, the model boyfriend.
00:07It's all falling into place.
00:09Hey, Jake.
00:12What'd you want to talk about?
00:14We need to break up.
00:15What?
00:16Come on, Claire.
00:17Things haven't been working out for a while.
00:19But everything was going so well.
00:21I've been seeing someone else.
00:23It's okay, Claire.
00:25I mean, it's not the end of the world.
00:28You'll find someone.
00:31Claire.
00:33My jacket.
00:43See, it's cool.
00:50Look, I get it's only been a week,
00:52but this moping, it's gotta stop.
00:55We were together for two years, though.
00:57Exactly!
00:58Forget him.
00:59This is our senior year,
01:00literally the perfect time to just start fresh.
01:02I don't want to start fresh.
01:04I just want Jake back.
01:05Wait, wait, wait, pause.
01:07You want to get back together with him?
01:09Of course I do.
01:11Even though he cheated on you.
01:13Even though he cheated on you.
01:16Everyone makes mistakes.
01:18Oh, okay.
01:19Look, sooner or later,
01:20he's gonna realize how much he misses me.
01:22You know you're my best friend, right?
01:24Yeah.
01:25So seeing you like this,
01:27it honestly kills me.
01:30So if you really, really want to get back together with Jake,
01:34then I'm willing to help you.
01:37Really?
01:38Yeah.
01:39Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you.
01:40Okay, okay, okay, okay.
01:42Okay, there's one thing you can do,
01:44like one thing that'll drive him crazy
01:45and just straight back into your arms.
01:47What is it?
01:48Operation Jealousy.
01:51Operation Jealousy?
01:53You gotta make him crazy jealous,
01:54and then he'll be crawling on his knees,
01:56begging to get back together with you.
01:58Okay, and how do I do that?
02:01Simple.
02:02You bring a hot guy to his birthday party tomorrow.
02:04I don't know.
02:06Seems kind of crazy to me.
02:07Well, you need to trust me,
02:08because it's gonna work.
02:09Okay, well, how am I supposed to find
02:11a new boyfriend in the next 24 hours?
02:13Babe, it's 2020.
02:15You know that anything's possible.
02:17Plus, I found this new app called BF Bundle,
02:21where you can hire a fake boyfriend for the night.
02:23Wait, how do you know about this?
02:26This is about you.
02:27This is about you.
02:28So...
02:30Okay, well, how does it work?
02:31Well, first, we need to create your profile.
02:34And...
02:35Done.
02:36Now we just wait.
02:39Actually, hold on, I'm gonna add a bio
02:40to make you seem a little bit more...
02:43fun.
02:45Okay, I am plenty of fun.
02:48Look at you right now.
02:50Okay, fair enough.
02:51Yeah.
02:53And...
02:54Oh, oh, whoa.
02:56You already have a match, dude.
02:57You have a match.
02:58And the reviews are raving that he is a total hottie.
03:02Oh my God, let me see.
03:04Swoon-worthy.
03:05Yeah.
03:06Local athlete.
03:08He has a five-star rating.
03:09Yeah, that sounds perfect for you.
03:12Wait, why aren't there any photos?
03:14Um, oh, the app says it's a privacy thing
03:16you have to commit to at least to meet up.
03:18Oh.
03:20I'll take this.
03:21Let's see.
03:22Wait, what are you doing?
03:25Done.
03:27You're meeting him today.
03:29Today?
03:30Yeah.
03:31Like, this today?
03:32This one.
03:33So, let's get dressed.
03:34Zoe!
03:35Yeah!
03:36Zoe!
03:37Come on!
03:38That is too soon!
03:49Damon!
03:50Hey.
03:51I thought you were at a hockey convention all summer.
03:54No, it ended.
03:55I just got back into town.
03:56Plus, Jake wouldn't stop going on about his big birthday bash.
03:59Guess I'll see you there?
04:01Um, no.
04:02Actually, we broke up.
04:04Oh.
04:05Oh, man.
04:06I'm sorry to hear that.
04:07Thanks.
04:08Well, I'm meeting someone, so have a good night.
04:10Yeah, you too.
04:19Bye.
04:33You know, I'm sure they'll be here any second.
04:35You don't have to wait.
04:36Thank you, though.
04:37I'm not.
04:38I'm actually...
04:39I happen to be meeting someone, too.
04:41Do you have to do it right here?
04:44It's public street, so I'm pretty sure that means we can share the sidewalk.
04:49I'm supposed to meet this girl I've been texting.
04:51Poor thing's going through a rough breakup.
04:58Drama Queen 2020?
05:00Oh, man!
05:01What?
05:02This is epic!
05:03This is a mistake.
05:04Look, forget about everything.
05:05You can even keep the money.
05:06Oh, no, no, no.
05:07You can't get away that easy.
05:08Please, don't tell Jake about this.
05:10Okay, I won't tell him.
05:12And I'll do you one better.
05:14I'll be your fake boyfriend.
05:18What?
05:20What?
05:21That's why you're in the app, right?
05:22I just wanted to hire someone for a date.
05:25You know, make Jake jealous.
05:26Great, I'm in.
05:27No!
05:28Look, we can't do that.
05:29He's your brother.
05:31Who also happens to be a massive jerk for what he did to you.
05:33I mean, I can't believe he cheated on you.
05:36No one's going to believe that you're actually dating me.
05:40Everyone knows you don't do relationships.
05:43Maybe I'm full of surprises.
05:45No, forget it.
05:46Look, I'll find someone else.
05:47Look, you're not going to do better than going out with Jake's older, charming, and much hotter brother.
05:53Come on, you want to make him jealous and I want to teach him a lesson.
05:56It's a win-win.
06:01Fine.
06:02But we follow my plan.
06:03No improvising.
06:05Yes, ma'am.
06:07So, when exactly are we going to do this?
06:09Tomorrow night.
06:11That's his birthday party.
06:13Exactly.
06:14That's his birthday party.
06:15That's his birthday party.
06:16Exactly.
06:18Wow.
06:19Well, you're definitely full of surprises.
06:23Will you please answer the question?
06:25Jeez, take it easy.
06:27I hired you to be my boyfriend, remember?
06:30You have to know how we got together in case anyone asks.
06:33Okay, okay, yeah.
06:34What was the question?
06:35Where did we go on our first date?
06:39Um...
06:40We had a magical night at the movies.
06:43Do people even go to the movies anymore?
06:45Yes, they do.
06:46Isn't that kind of lame?
06:47It's not lame.
06:49It's believable.
06:51No, what we need is an epic love story to blow everyone's mind.
06:57What epic love story?
06:59We've been dating for like a week.
07:02Well, haven't you ever heard of love at first sight?
07:09Haven't you ever heard of love at first sight?
07:14I've known you for two years, Damon.
07:16Fine, love at second sight.
07:19Look, I just don't want this to blow up in my face because of one misstep.
07:22I'm getting Jake back.
07:24He cheated on you.
07:25It was a mistake.
07:26Besides, I put too much in this relationship just to throw it away.
07:29Wow, how romantic.
07:31You just don't understand the value of being in a committed relationship.
07:35Real relationships never work.
07:38That's why I'm on the app.
07:39With fake relationships, I can enjoy it all without any disappointment.
07:46How romantic.
07:50Well, I gotta go. I've got hockey practice before the party tonight.
07:54Wait, we haven't even gone over my favorite hobbies yet.
07:56How about you drop the plan and just see where the night takes you?
08:00Ever heard of the risk worth taking?
08:02Ever heard of don't mess with a good thing?
08:04Look, I'll follow your lead tonight, but you need to loosen up.
08:08I mean, have some fun.
08:10When was the last time you had fun, Claire?
08:12I have plenty of fun.
08:14Yeah?
08:15Yeah, that's fun. That's almost too fun.
08:19Can't wait to see that later tonight.
08:27Nope. No more of that.
08:30Didn't realize you're an expert in makeup now.
08:33What I mean is you don't need any makeup.
08:35You already look amazing with that.
08:37You can save the theatrics for now. We're not at the party yet.
08:40No, I'm serious. You look beautiful. You always do.
08:45Thank you. I guess I'm just nervous.
08:48Don't worry. I'll be by your side the whole night. I promise.
08:52You shouldn't have to work so hard for Jake anyway.
08:54I mean, you're already way out of his league.
08:56Okay, now I know you're joking.
08:59When you guys first started dating, I couldn't believe my brother's luck.
09:03And you're ridiculously smart.
09:06You starred in all the school plays, got every solo and chorus.
09:09You're still a type of mathlete.
09:13I can't believe you know all that.
09:15I always thought you just ignored me.
09:17You're my little brother's girlfriend. I had to keep my distance, but...
09:21I still pay attention.
09:23You know, when you drop the whole too-cool-for-school act,
09:26you're actually a pretty decent guy, Damon Coyle.
09:29Hey, careful. I have a reputation to uphold.
09:32No, I'm serious. I think you might actually make a great boyfriend.
09:37I mean, when you finally decide to try with someone, of course.
09:43Claire?
09:46We're here.
10:03People are looking.
10:05Why are they looking?
10:06They're looking because you're with me.
10:08And when you're with me, you actually get to have some fun for once.
10:32What are you doing?
10:33You're gonna be late for class.
10:35I'll be right back.
10:36I'm gonna get us drinks. I'll be right back.
10:38You're not gonna be late for class.
10:39I'm gonna be late for class.
10:41I'm gonna get us drinks. I'll be right back.
10:43I'm gonna go get us some drinks, I'll be right back.
11:01Okay wow wow wow, it looks like things are heating up.
11:03I know right?
11:04It's almost like Operation Jealousy might actually work.
11:07Yeah, no, I was talking about you two.
11:09What?
11:10You and the town hottie?
11:11No, I mean we're just, I don't know.
11:15Pretending or actually having fun for once?
11:18You know, you two kind of look cute together, plus I haven't seen you smile this much in
11:22a long time.
11:23Oh my god, there he is.
11:25Oh my god, there he is.
11:28See, he can't be over me.
11:30Look at his face.
11:31Oh my gosh, is that Chelsea?
11:37Thank you so much for Girl Code and I thought she was your friend.
11:43He said he'd only give his jacket to one special girl.
11:49It's time to amp this party up.
11:56Did someone say never have I ever?
12:01Let's play.
12:02I don't think that's a good idea.
12:06Come on, it'll be fun.
12:18Zoe, why don't you go first?
12:21Okay, um, never have I ever fantasized about a teacher.
12:28Ooh, cute.
12:30Now let's see, never have I ever been pathetic enough to crash Max's birthday party.
12:40Ooh, cute.
12:42Now let's see, never have I ever been pathetic enough to crash Max's birthday party.
12:51Never have I ever been some loser's side chick.
12:55Never have I ever been desperate enough to swoop in on someone's ex.
12:59Never have I ever cheated on someone completely out of my league.
13:02Never have I ever slept with basically every girl in this room.
13:10Face it, Claire.
13:12You'll never be more than just another number to him.
13:17Claire.
13:18Claire.
13:23Seriously, Claire?
13:24You're gonna show up to my party just to start drama?
13:26No, I didn't do anything.
13:27It was Chelsea.
13:28Don't blame Chelsea.
13:30You're just jealous.
13:34You know what?
13:35You two deserve each other.
13:38Hey, dude, are you okay?
13:40Because that game was brutal.
13:42And where did Damon run off to?
13:45I don't know.
13:46He said he was gonna be by my side the entire night and I thought we were...
13:51Doesn't even matter anymore.
13:53Is Claire Sanders actually breaking protocol?
13:56No matter how hard I plan or how carefully I try to put my life into this perfect little box,
14:01it all comes crashing down around me.
14:03And now the one guy I might actually have real feelings for is off God knows where
14:08probably setting up a new date with the girl in that stupid app.
14:13So, yeah, I'm done planning.
14:16Plans can suck it.
14:26Hey, sorry I ran out like that.
14:28I left my phone in the car and I had to grab it to get on the app.
14:31Of course.
14:32What?
14:33Just...
14:34Wait, wait, wait.
14:35Where are you going?
14:36Home.
14:37And don't worry, I'll still write a good review for you.
14:39I wouldn't want you to miss out on any more epic dates.
14:41Hey, talk to me.
14:43You just left me in there.
14:46I know.
14:47I'm sorry.
14:48I wasn't thinking.
14:49I don't care anymore, Damon.
14:50Look, you were right.
14:51Jake's an ass.
14:52I don't care anymore.
14:54Look, you were right.
14:55Jake's an ass.
14:56So, the plan, this, it's over.
15:02What if I don't want it to be over?
15:04What if I don't want it to be over?
15:07You could have your pick of any girl out there.
15:09So, why don't you just get on the app and find someone else?
15:11Yeah, I got on the app because I wanted to delete it.
15:15What?
15:16I deactivated my account.
15:18Why would you do that?
15:20Look, I know I'm just another number.
15:21You're not just another number.
15:23Okay?
15:24You never were.
15:27I don't want a fake date with you anymore.
15:29Alright?
15:31I want a real one.
15:38I thought you said that real relationships never work.
15:42Well, maybe I realized that you're the risk worth taking.
15:53Okay.
16:07Come on.
16:08Slapchat 239.
16:10Take me home.
16:17Are you sure I'm doing this right?
16:18Yeah, just make sure these two dots match.
16:21So make that side a little bit bigger.
16:23Okay.
16:24I am trusting the process.
16:26I'm just glad we get to go stag together.
16:28You never got a date, right?
16:30No date.
16:31But Damon's really not coming?
16:33I bought him a ticket in case he changes mind, but he won't budge.
16:37Well, that's his loss because you are about to be the best homecoming queen that we have ever seen.
16:44No way!
16:45I don't even know how I got nominated.
16:48And of course, Jake is on the ballot because he's the only reason why our soccer team wins.
16:52I feel like the only reason I'm on there is because people want to see what Chelsea will do if I win.
16:56Knowing her, she'll probably dump a bucket of pig's blood on my head.
16:59At least she's vegan, so you know it'll be synthetic.
17:03Maybe Jake, like, campaigned for you guys to reignite something.
17:07Because I heard rumblings that him and Chelsea aren't doing too hot right now.
17:12Ooh, trouble in cheater's paradise.
17:14Shocker.
17:15Where did you even hear that, anyway?
17:18I don't even remember.
17:20You know, gossip travels.
17:23That looks pretty good.
17:25But it could also be your newfound popularity from dating Damon.
17:28It hasn't exactly gone unnoticed that you get picked up on a motorcycle every single day.
17:33Yes, Damon.
17:35My knight in shining armor who can't even be bothered to take his girlfriend to her school dance.
17:42I mean, at least he's hot.
17:45So hot.
17:48It's so weird that Joey didn't ask you to be his date.
17:51Um, not that weird. We haven't talked in a while.
17:54Why? I thought you were starting to dig him.
17:56As soon as I figured out that our names couldn't have one of those cool celebrity abbreviations, it was over before it began.
18:02Jay-Zoey.
18:04Zoey. Absolutely not.
18:07Well, more Zoey for me.
18:09Nothing's gonna keep us apart.
18:12Oh, it's Damon!
18:15Oh, it's Damon!
18:16Or should I say Claremon?
18:19Can I call you back to finish this?
18:20Yeah, you can, Claremon.
18:22But you better, because we need to finish this look.
18:24Okay, bye.
18:27Hey, beautif-
18:29What's up with your eyes?
18:31It's not finished yet.
18:33You look like Amy Winehouse on a Tuesday morning.
18:35Zoey is giving me a tutorial for the dance tonight.
18:38Ah, yes.
18:40I almost forgot who I was speaking with.
18:42My sincerest apologies. Your Royalness.
18:45I know how you can make it up to me.
18:48Nope.
18:49Come on, you're seriously gonna let me do this alone?
18:52You're not gonna be alone. I thought you were rolling with Zo.
18:55Plus, if you listen very carefully, I bet you can hear Jay-
18:59Yep, there's Jay, bouncing off the walls. Dude is pumped.
19:02Yeah, because dances are super fun, and even more fun if you have a date like he does.
19:08Yeah, for now.
19:09What do you mean?
19:11Chelsea's been soft-ghosting him. I don't think she's that excited about the dance.
19:16Why could that be? Because yours truly got nominated and she didn't?
19:21Oh yeah, I'm sure that's it.
19:23I bet that is it.
19:25She's gonna be so pissed if I win.
19:27Queen for the night.
19:30She's gonna be so pissed if I win.
19:32Queen for the night.
19:34And then, you know, for the rest of the school year, because I would have to play in prom,
19:38and then the homecoming queen normally becomes the prom queen, and then-
19:41I seriously doubt she's thinking about this a quarter as much as you are.
19:44How could she not be?
19:48Because nobody cares about this king and queen stuff as much as you and Jake. It's lame.
19:52Easy for you to say. You got nominated all four years and didn't even show up.
19:56I get that this seems like a big deal to you now, but I promise when you get out of high school,
20:00you'll realize none of this stuff matters.
20:02Wow. And, uh, you think Chelsea has already reached this higher consciousness?
20:09No, I'm not talking about her.
20:11You know, come to think of it, if you both are so mature, maybe you should skip the dance together,
20:15get a cheese board, and, you know, talk about all the super important adult stuff that actually matters.
20:24Oh, look. Someone my age is calling.
20:26I didn't mean- Claire-
20:28Bye.
20:32I need to fix this.
20:37Hey, Jake.
20:39Claire! Hey, um, thanks for picking up.
20:43Whoa, did Zoe do this to you?
20:47It's a work in progress. What's up?
20:49Cool. Um, I just wanted to call you and Touch Base
20:56and just, you know, make sure that things don't get awkward tonight.
21:02You mean if we win?
21:04Oh, we're gonna win.
21:07Is Chelsea gonna be upset if, when, we win?
21:12If, um, if she looks up on her phone long enough to notice, maybe.
21:16Aw, texting someone else?
21:18It'd be a shame if she were in, like, a secret relationship. That would suck.
21:22Look, Claire, I know that I can never apologize enough for what I did,
21:27but I really am sorry.
21:31I didn't mean to hurt you, and if I could take it back, I would.
21:37It's fine. It's fine.
21:39Just, at least she'll be there. Damon won't even come.
21:44Yeah, I never really understood his thing with dances.
21:48I mean, like, we always had a great time.
21:50I know. It's a chance to get, like, dressed up and have fun and make grand romantic gestures.
21:56Jinx!
21:59Don't tell anyone that I just said that.
22:04Whoa. Is that the dress that you've been saving since freshman year?
22:08Yeah. I can't believe I'll finally be able to wear it.
22:14And I can't believe this will be our first high school dance where we aren't going together.
22:20Yeah. Me neither.
22:22I hope we win so we at least get one dance together.
22:29Well, how about either way, we make it happen. One dance before the night's over.
22:34Deal.
22:36As long as you promise not to step on my dress like you did junior year.
22:40That was sophomore year.
22:41It was both.
22:45Fine. As long as you promise not to bust out your grandma moves.
22:50What? You mean this one?
22:53Oh, God. My eyes! Stop it! My eyes!
23:00What? Like you can do better?
23:02Oh, come on. Anyone can do better than whatever that was.
23:06Let's see. By all means.
23:20Oh, sorry. Chelsea's calling me. I should get it.
23:28I'll see you later?
23:30Yeah, yeah. See ya.
23:33Hello? Hello? I'm just trying to show you what you're missing.
23:39Wow. You look incredible.
23:42Thanks. Are you going somewhere?
23:46No, I'm not going anywhere.
23:48I'm just going to hang out with my friends.
23:50Oh, okay.
23:52I'll see you later?
23:54Yeah.
23:56Bye.
23:58Bye.
24:00Are you going somewhere?
24:02Yeah, there's a cheese board with my name on it I need to get to.
24:05Look, I'm sorry about before.
24:08I know it's just a stupid dance, but it's my last homecoming.
24:12And, I don't know, I really wanted you to be there.
24:15Yeah, I'm sorry too. I should have known how important it was to you.
24:19It's okay.
24:20How do you do this?
24:23You're getting pretty dressed up to eat a cheese board with your brother's girlfriend.
24:27If you think I'm going to let my brother have all the fun, you're crazy.
24:31Is this going to match your dress?
24:34You're coming?
24:36And you got me a corsage?
24:38Is that against the rule to bring your own crowns?
24:40I just want to make sure people know who the true king and queen are.
24:43Are you crying for me?
24:45For what?
24:46Nothing. Nothing.
24:48I'm just talking to myself.
24:50Okay, well how about a little less chit-chat and a little more boogie?
24:54Come on, Claire, we've got a homecoming to get to.
24:56And I, for one, am wearing my dancing shoes.
25:00Okay.
25:15This part always gets me.
25:20Yes!
25:22Yes, yes, it is so sad.
25:24Are you watching hockey right now?
25:26What? No.
25:28No, I mean, I'm not not watching hockey.
25:32Come on, babe, cut me some slack.
25:34It's my birthday tomorrow and these are two of my favorite teams.
25:37This is a classic, Damon. Anybody who's anybody has seen this.
25:41Classic's just code for old.
25:43I don't know why I bother trying to culture you.
25:46Anyway, what's the plans for tomorrow, birthday boy?
25:50Well, since I've been away for two weeks,
25:52I was thinking I could kiss your face for the first half of the day
25:55and then, you know, we get to party later.
25:57Um...
25:59Crap, crap, crap.
26:02Um, Nico Guitar Flames is going? Who's that?
26:07I completely forgot.
26:09I have a lesson.
26:11Now.
26:13Is this why you've gotten so into guitar lately?
26:17Hey, my favorite student.
26:20And my favorite student's friend?
26:24We were just watching The Long Way and we lost track of time.
26:28Oh, yes. I see you took my recommendation.
26:31Such a classic.
26:34Boyfriend.
26:36What?
26:37Not a friend. I'm her boyfriend.
26:39Oh, lucky guy.
26:41Who was just leaving.
26:43Bye, Damon.
26:44I mean, I can stay.
26:46I'd love to see what you two have been working so hard on lately.
26:48No! I mean...
26:50No! No.
26:52She's right. Music is so personal.
26:54So intimate.
26:56Something to be shared between two.
26:58Or three.
26:59Oh, no. Almost never three.
27:04Young love. Such a beautiful thing.
27:06Love? Who said?
27:08I... I don't... We...
27:10I... I... We don't...
27:12Um...
27:14Have you ever been in love?
27:17Of course.
27:19Yeah, I've been in love a bunch of times.
27:22I mean, not a bunch of times.
27:25The normal amount of times.
27:27There's just a lot of pressure on when to say it.
27:30You know? There's a lot of stress.
27:32And then you don't know who should say it first.
27:34Or when you should say it.
27:36Or if they'll ever say it back.
27:40Maybe I can help you find a way to say it.
27:47Should we begin?
27:49Should we begin?
27:51Yeah!
27:58Damon?
28:00Hey, Zoe! What's up? How are you doing?
28:02I'm good.
28:06That's awesome! I'm... I'm also good.
28:09You know, I've been away at training camp for a couple weeks.
28:11Coming home tomorrow.
28:13So...
28:15I have some funny little questions for you.
28:17Claire's guitar teacher.
28:21Nico...
28:23Yeah.
28:25He's not even that good looking. Like, at all.
28:27Oh, no. He's a solid 9.5.
28:29And then him playing guitar takes him to about a 12.
28:32I just think it's weird.
28:34You know? We...
28:36She's doubled her lessons while I've been away.
28:38And we're watching movies they both like.
28:40Wouldn't you feel a little bit weird about your girlfriend
28:42hanging out with some guitar player
28:44multiple times a week?
28:46I thought you said he wasn't good looking.
28:48Zoe...
28:50Okay.
28:52I wouldn't feel great about it.
28:54But I'd be confident in my relationship.
28:56I would know that she really wants to be with me.
28:58And not him.
29:00I just don't get it.
29:02I mean, she's being so secretive about it.
29:04I haven't even heard her play anything.
29:06Yeah, Damon. I don't know.
29:08Don't you have any guy friends to call about this?
29:10Who am I going to talk to, Zoe?
29:13Guys, don't talk about stuff.
29:15If only you knew somebody that dated Claire
29:17and knew her really, really well.
29:19Jake?
29:21Yeah. Is that weird?
29:23I mean, it can't be weirder than you calling me about this.
29:25Yeah, okay. You're right.
29:27You're good friends, though.
29:29Claire's lucky to have you on her side.
29:31Don't stress. I'm sure there's absolutely nothing to worry about.
29:33Plus, isn't it your birthday tomorrow?
29:35Focus on that.
29:37Yeah. Thanks, though.
29:39I'll see you tomorrow.
29:43Love.
29:45Love.
29:47Love.
29:49Hey, birthday boy.
29:51Not until tomorrow. Where's Jake?
29:53He's in the shower. He just got back from practice
29:55and he's disgusting.
29:57I was totally going to wish you a happy birthday,
29:59but I didn't have your number.
30:01Yeah, let's keep it that way.
30:03So what's on the agenda?
30:05What time am I picking you up tonight?
30:07Kidding. Obviously.
30:09Does perfect Claire have a perfect little date planned?
30:11Other than running off the guitar teacher?
30:13Probably not.
30:15Oh, that's right. She started studying with Nico.
30:17Wait, you know Nico?
30:19Yeah. I set them up.
30:21He's amazing. So, so talented.
30:23So, so talented.
30:25What do you mean you set them up?
30:27Well, she was saying a few weeks ago
30:29at the house that she's been wanting to learn.
30:31So, I don't know.
30:33I suggested Nico.
30:35Oh, great. So this is your fault. Thanks a lot.
30:37Where was I?
30:39Are you listening per usual?
30:41That's not true.
30:43I listen.
30:45Whatever.
30:47Anyway, out of the kindness of my generous heart,
30:49I suggested Nico.
30:51Every girl should have a few lessons with him.
30:53He teaches you so much.
30:55I wouldn't expect your smashed hockey brain
30:57to understand.
30:59What exactly wouldn't I understand?
31:01What exactly wouldn't I understand?
31:03Music, art,
31:05culture, languages.
31:08You're not like afraid she's gonna
31:10ditch you for a guy she can actually have a conversation with,
31:12are you?
31:14We have conversations, Chelsea.
31:16Is Jake out of the shower yet?
31:18Oh yeah, the what, huh?
31:20Hockey? And then hockey?
31:22Oh, of course, right. There's always hockey.
31:24Seriously though, Damon,
31:26hockey's like your one true love and
31:28it's kind of boring.
31:30I love other things.
31:32Like what?
31:34Like Claire. And I don't want to run it off with some
31:36star playing, art, culture
31:38looking snob, alright?
31:40Look,
31:42I'm not saying I'm an
31:44expert on all things Claire, but
31:46dating brothers has forced us
31:48to hang out with each other more than either of us
31:50would have liked, and she's actually
31:52kind of interesting.
31:54So,
31:56maybe you should at least pretend
31:58to care about some of the things she likes.
32:00Yeah.
32:02That's actually not terrible advice.
32:04Consider it my birthday gift to you.
32:06Gee, thanks a lot.
32:08So, what are you still
32:10doing here? Go before she hires
32:12Nico to be your boyfriend at your party tomorrow.
32:14Bye!
32:16So, what are you still doing here?
32:18Go before she hires Nico
32:20to be your boyfriend at your party tomorrow.
32:22Bye!
32:24Yeah, yeah, okay, whatever. Thanks, bye.
32:34Hey!
32:40I was just gonna call you.
32:42You're all dressed up.
32:44Damon,
32:46I've been wanting to tell you how I feel.
32:48And, and I,
32:50this was going to be a birthday surprise, but
32:52I just,
32:54I didn't think
32:56it could wait.
33:00Okay.
33:04Okay.
33:10You're the cream in my coffee
33:12You're the apple in my eye
33:14You make me wanna laugh
33:16And I think I'm gonna cry
33:18But you're the one
33:20So there's one thing I must do
33:26I have to say
33:30I love you.
33:34I love you, too.
33:36Moments, you are.
33:38I'm sorry, but I needed you to know it.
33:40I love you so much, Claire.
33:42And I'm sorry that I got
33:44weird earlier, but I talked to Zoe, and
33:46You talked to Zoe?
33:48Yeah, and she told me not to worry.
33:50And she told me that she always has your back, which
33:52I love.
33:54Love.
33:56And I talked to Chelsea. Ew, why didn't you talk to Chelsea?
33:58I don't know, she sucks.
34:00But she did say one thing that wasn't terrible.
34:03I want to make more of an effort to share
34:05your interests, Claire.
34:07I want to watch whatever you want to watch
34:09and talk about musicals.
34:11Even the old ones, I don't care.
34:13Just no subtitles, deal?
34:15Deal.
34:17Okay.
34:19Babe? Yeah?
34:21Do you think I could finish my song?
34:23I worked really hard on it.
34:25Yes, please.
34:27Blue eyed baby
34:29as bright as the sky
34:31Hidden in a cloud
34:33but never felt so high
34:35Think you're the one
34:37so it's one thing I must do
34:39Have to say
34:41I love you
34:43Do do do do do do do
34:45Do do do do do do
34:47Do do do do do do
34:49Do do do do do do
34:51Do do do do do do
34:53Do do do do do do
34:55Did you change your pillowcases?
34:57No.
34:59Claire, do not leave them there.
35:01That looks like trash.
35:03Do you have time to do a load of laundry?
35:05Not really, but yeah.
35:07Did you get the champagne?
35:09Yes.
35:11Chocolates? Rose petals?
35:13Massage oils? Scented candles?
35:15All of that?
35:17Claire, I'm playing with you.
35:19I literally don't understand why you're freaking out right now.
35:21One, Damon's been in your room
35:24You're not a virgin.
35:26I'm a virgin to sleeping with brothers.
35:28True.
35:30That's awkward.
35:32Is there a term for that?
35:34Sleeping with brothers.
35:36Please
35:38do not ever google that.
35:40Ever.
35:42You're not helping, so
35:44look, this is a big night.
35:46After tonight, that's it.
35:48What do you mean, this is it?
35:50Like, me and Damon. There's no going back.
35:52Going back to what? To Jake?
35:54Have you guys been talking or something?
35:56No.
35:58Not talking.
36:00I don't know. We dated for so long.
36:02It feels like a betrayal, you know?
36:06And, plus, I know Chelsea broke up with him,
36:08so I know he's not in a good place.
36:10About time.
36:12She dragged that on long enough.
36:14What's that supposed to mean?
36:16Nothing, Claire.
36:18I don't think you sleeping with your boyfriend is a betrayal.
36:21You're good.
36:23You think they'll talk about it?
36:25Oh my god, what if they compare notes?
36:27Oh god, that's so awkward.
36:29I think the only one that gets to do the comparing is you.
36:31Plus, Damon is gonna be ten times better than Jake.
36:33Think about all that experience.
36:35Why would you say that?
36:37So, I didn't even think of it like that.
36:41He's been with so many girls.
36:43What if he thinks I don't know what I'm doing?
36:47God, thanks a lot.
36:49That's literally not what I meant at all.
36:53Oh, it's Damon. Wish me luck.
36:55Bye.
37:01Hey.
37:05You are definitely running late,
37:07but since you are shirtless
37:09and you probably smell good,
37:11I'll let it slide.
37:13You are definitely running late,
37:15but since you are shirtless
37:17and you probably smell good,
37:19I'll let it slide.
37:21Hey, so I got some news.
37:23Bad news?
37:25No, just, do you remember Natasha?
37:27Natasha?
37:29Your super hot ex
37:31who ran away to live off the land in Japan?
37:33Ride her bicycle across Thailand,
37:35but yeah, great.
37:37So you remember.
37:39She's back.
37:41Oh, so that's horrible news.
37:43I know we're supposed to hang tonight.
37:46Do you mind if you bail
37:48to run off with a literal model
37:50who also happens to be your ex-girlfriend?
37:52Hmm, let me think about that.
37:54I know it's a little bit weird,
37:56but I promise, she just wants to stop by,
37:58show me some pictures,
38:00and she's leaving again in like a week.
38:02Wait, wait, she's coming over to your place?
38:04Why can't you just insta-stalk her
38:06like any normal ex-boyfriend?
38:08Actually,
38:10uh, do not.
38:12She is the literal girl version of you.
38:14That's exactly why we didn't work.
38:16Trust me, it's strictly a friend thing.
38:18I don't know, I know who you guys were when you moved together.
38:20You couldn't keep your hands off each other.
38:22Yeah, now I can't keep my hands off you.
38:24I'm being serious.
38:26We both have exes, Claire, come on.
38:28Don't forget I had to watch you date my brother
38:30for two years.
38:32Don't forget I had to watch you date my brother for two years.
38:34Okay, I don't want to fight.
38:36I just, I really wanted to spend time with you tonight.
38:38I was hoping this could be
38:40our special...
38:42She's here, I gotta go.
38:44Love you.
38:57I know I said I wanted updates,
38:59but definitely did not mean in real time.
39:01Haha, funny.
39:03You know what else is funny?
39:05Damon running off with his ex-girlfriend.
39:07Wow, which one?
39:09Please don't say Natasha.
39:12Oh.
39:14Didn't she move to the Philippines?
39:16Thailand.
39:18And just for the year, sadly.
39:20Damon finally moving on
39:22must have triggered her spidey sense
39:24and now she's returned to ruin my perfect night.
39:26Claire, she's an influencer.
39:28Not a comic book villain.
39:30Same difference.
39:32Okay, Natasha's back, but that doesn't have to mean anything.
39:34Was Damon acting excited or weird?
39:36He showered.
39:38Okay.
39:40He's pretty.
39:42He does that.
39:44Anything else?
39:46I trust Damon.
39:48I don't trust her.
39:50Shit.
39:52She just posted a story.
39:54I can't look at it.
39:56She'll know.
39:58She has 80,000 followers.
40:00She's not gonna see your name.
40:02I can't look, Zoe.
40:04You look.
40:06What is that?
40:08Oh.
40:14Why would you have me look at that?
40:16Ugh!
40:20This is it.
40:22We're gonna get married, have two and a half kids,
40:24and have a yurt in Iceland.
40:26You know, I did hear that Reykjavik is really beautiful
40:28in springtime, actually.
40:30Ugh.
40:32Again, with the not helping.
40:34But this was supposed to be our biggest night of our lives.
40:37I'm allowed to be disappointed.
40:39But you're being insane.
40:41Damon loves you.
40:43He's not getting back together with Natasha.
40:45Did you see the photo?
40:47He is supposed to be drinking and snuggling with me.
40:49Not her.
40:51They're not snuggling.
40:53And to be fair, you didn't tell him about this perfect night,
40:55so you can't be mad at him for not being a mind reader.
40:57You didn't tell him about this perfect night,
40:59so you can't be mad at him for not being a mind reader.
41:01What's going on?
41:03Why are you taking my side on this?
41:05Nothing's wrong with me.
41:07I'm just saying that, like...
41:09Whatever. I gotta go.
41:11Don't trip. I'm sure it'll be fine.
41:13Beep, beep, beep.
41:25Hi.
41:27Are you calling from Reykjavik?
41:29What?
41:31Nothing.
41:34I thought you were hanging out with Natasha.
41:36Uh, yeah, I was, but, you know,
41:38there's only so many pictures of Thailand a person can take.
41:40What happened?
41:42Nothing. What? Nothing.
41:44Nothing nothing? Or something nothing?
41:46You were right.
41:48That was a bad idea.
41:50It was stupid for me to think we could just hang as friends.
41:52She hasn't changed at all.
41:54I mean, she invited me to go to Bali with her,
41:56and she tried to kiss me.
41:58Wait. You kissed?
42:00No. No, she tried.
42:02I shouldn't have put myself in that position.
42:04Did you want to kiss her?
42:06No way. Are you kidding?
42:08You're the only person I want to kiss. Like, ever.
42:10Why don't you
42:12say that to my face?
42:14Why don't you let me up? I'm outside.
42:16You're here?
42:18Wait, are you sure?
42:20I only have 700 followers.
42:22Please. You know she bought all those followers, right?
42:24What?
42:26100%. But,
42:28do I see some black silk under there?
42:30I'm much more interested in that.
42:32Come on. Let me up.
42:40Keep going. Now, target zone for the straight punches.
42:42Right for the front of the face. Palms are down.
42:44Elbows are tight.
42:46There we go.
42:48Damon's texted me, I love you,
42:50three times since this morning.
42:52Who knew he'd get some mushy after sex?
42:54That's awesome.
42:56And he took me out for breakfast.
42:59Did I say that already? Like, four times.
43:01Oh, well, now I guess I said it five.
43:03Anyway,
43:05did you hear that Natasha pays for her followers?
43:07How embarrassing
43:09and sad is that?
43:11Damon was talking about how...
43:13Uppercuts. Target zone. Where is it? Underneath the chin.
43:15Elbows tight to the body.
43:17Wow.
43:19That's actually the first question you've asked me
43:21in months.
43:23Whoa, are you mad at me?
43:25Not mad. I'm just tired.
43:27Well, we can pause it.
43:29I mean... No, Claire.
43:31I'm tired of this one-sided friendship dance
43:33that we've been doing since you started dating Damon.
43:35I don't know what you're talking about.
43:37You realize that we were supposed to go to homecoming
43:39together, right? And then Damon came.
43:41And the only time you call me is to
43:43ask or talk about Damon. And now
43:45Damon's calling me to talk about you
43:47and I am tired of it.
43:49We're supposed to be best friends, right?
43:51I am your best friend. No.
43:53I'm your best friend and you've been asleep at the wheel.
43:55I am your best friend. No.
43:57I'm your best friend and you've been asleep at the wheel.
43:59Well, I'm sorry I'm talking
44:01a little too much about my boyfriend
44:03but I don't think it's fair to say that I've been a bad friend.
44:05I mean... Well, I think a good friend
44:07would notice that their best friend
44:09has been going through something huge
44:11the past few months.
44:13Oh, my God. What? Zoe, are you okay?
44:15Yeah, I'm actually
44:17great.
44:19I've been seeing someone and
44:21it's getting pretty serious.
44:24But it's been exhausting
44:26not being able to just talk to you about it.
44:28You can talk to me about anything.
44:30This is so exciting. Who is it?
44:32It's not important.
44:34What do you mean it's not important?
44:36I want to know who stole my bestie's heart.
44:38Come on!
44:40She didn't steal anything. It just kind of
44:42happened.
44:44I didn't think we'd get along so well but
44:46she's just
44:48perfect.
44:50Okay, so we've established it's a girl.
44:52I mean that shrinks the pool a little
44:54but you still haven't given me a good enough hint.
44:56Okay, maybe she's not perfect
44:58and it's just like the honeymoon phase
45:00talking. I don't know.
45:02I don't know what we are.
45:04It's like we're dating
45:06but we haven't put a label
45:08on it yet.
45:10I guess it's just like a little bit more complicated
45:12for Chelsea.
45:14What does Chelsea have to do with this?
45:16Because I'm the first girl
45:18she's ever been with.
45:20Hold on.
45:22You're dating Chelsea?
45:24Like ruined my life, Chelsea!
45:26Are you kidding me?
45:28We hate Chelsea!
45:30You know she broke up with Jake
45:32and he's devastated, right?
45:34Okay, but we don't care about Jake.
45:36We care about me, right?
45:38So you're the other woman now.
45:40That's not fair.
45:42I don't care about you.
45:44I don't care about you.
45:46I don't care about you.
45:49That's not fair.
45:51Especially because she wasn't even that into him.
45:53I'm sorry, what?
45:55She weaseled into our two year relationship
45:57because she wasn't that into him?
45:59Claire, why are you so wrapped up in that?
46:01Aren't you in heaven with Damon?
46:03Because I haven't heard you shut up about him
46:05in the last three months.
46:07Well, I'm sorry I didn't shut up long enough
46:09to hear of your disastrous plan
46:11to date the she-devil herself.
46:13I would have talked you out of it.
46:15You don't even know her, Claire.
46:17I don't know either of you.
46:19And whose fault is that?
46:21Listen, I can tell you exactly what Damon had for breakfast.
46:23But as soon as I share an important detail
46:25of my love life for once,
46:27you get up on your high horse
46:29and you rain judgment on everyone below you.
46:31I'm over it.
46:43Well, that went well.
46:45Uh-oh. How bad?
46:47If a dumpster fire filled with fuzzy puppies
46:49was a 10,
46:51then that was a 14.7.
46:53Gross.
46:55I'm sorry, babe.
46:57I know it couldn't have been easy,
46:59but at least Claire stopped talking long enough
47:01for you to tell her.
47:03That feels like a small win.
47:05I guess.
47:07I don't know, it's hard because I don't even know
47:09what I'm supposed to be telling her.
47:11Like, I didn't say that you were my girlfriend
47:14I think after last night
47:16it's pretty safe to say you're my girlfriend, Zoe.
47:20Cool.
47:22Cool.
47:24Chelsea, I really like you
47:26and I haven't been this happy with someone
47:28in a long time.
47:30I just wish that Claire could get her head
47:32out of her butt for five seconds
47:34to be excited for me.
47:36Whatever.
47:38I don't need her.
47:40I have you.
47:42As much as I'd love to have Claire out of my life forever,
47:44you guys have way too much history
47:46to throw it away.
47:48But that dumpster fire I was talking about?
47:50Yeah, it's active.
47:52Babe, I'm serious.
47:54You guys have been friends forever
47:56and I'm sure you've taken your turns
47:58over the years being the needy one.
48:00Babe, I'm serious.
48:02You guys have been friends forever
48:04and I'm sure you've taken your turns
48:06over the years being the needy one.
48:08Yeah, well, her 90 days have expired.
48:11I've never known you to be the type to not say what's on your mind
48:13but for some reason with Claire
48:15you just bottle it up and it's like
48:17you forgot how to stand up for yourself.
48:19Well, she dominates
48:21every single conversation with
48:23me and Damon did this and me and Damon did that.
48:25So you're telling me you haven't had
48:27a single chance to tell her about us?
48:29Or about how you were feeling?
48:31Or you may be holding back because you knew how she'd respond?
48:35Maybe.
48:37Claire's the one who needs to apologize
48:39but she's not the only one in the wrong.
48:45Why do you have to be so perfect?
48:47Bad habit.
48:49Alright,
48:51let me figure this out.
48:53Okay, call me back.
48:55Bye.
48:57Hey, what's going on?
48:59Chelsea?
49:01Did I open a cursed box?
49:03Was I a serial killer in a past life?
49:05What horrible karma am I due
49:07Chelsea exists to date everyone I love.
49:09She hasn't dated me.
49:11I will literally murder.
49:13She hasn't dated me.
49:15I will literally murder.
49:17Sounds like you'd be a serial killer in this life too.
49:19Why aren't you more bothered by this?
49:21Don't you feel bad for Jake?
49:23No, do you?
49:25No? Look, she has just weaseled her way
49:27through our entire friend group and I'm sick of it.
49:29I thought you guys were becoming buds.
49:31Didn't she set you up with Miko?
49:33Yeah, another way how she's ruined our lives.
49:36Why can't she just stay in her lane?
49:40What?
49:42Nothing, I just
49:44I hope you weren't like this with Zoe.
49:46I think it's cool. Zoe's never really had a relationship
49:48stick, has she?
49:50So maybe the fact that she's bringing this up to you
49:52could be something serious.
49:54Why'd she wait so long to tell me then?
49:56Maybe because she knew
49:58you were going to act like you did?
50:00Okay, so you think I'm the jerk?
50:02No, no.
50:04I just, I think it's
50:06maybe it's your turn to be the best friend.
50:08Yeah, the best friend to someone who's just screamed at me?
50:10Zoe's literally never screamed at anyone.
50:12She's the chillest person I know.
50:14I'm sorry to say it, babe.
50:16You know I'm on your side, but
50:18if she's this upset...
50:20I was wrong.
50:22You're still very cute, though.
50:24And I bet you're even cuter when you apologize.
50:26Not that I've ever seen it, but
50:28I'm sure we'll get there one day.
50:30Don't hold your breath.
50:34Okay.
50:36I am going to give her the
50:38best, best friend apology she's ever had.
50:40You got this.
50:42I'm proud of you.
50:44And thanks for loving me, even though I'm
50:46a teeny tiny bit
50:48difficult.
50:50Of course. You got this.
50:56Pick up. Please pick up.
51:00Never have I ever
51:02been the biggest jerk in the history of the world.
51:04I was gonna say
51:06been so selfish to someone who's
51:08always been there for me, but
51:10yours works, too.
51:12I messed up.
51:14You messed up big time.
51:16I know. I freaked.
51:18I'm so tired of hearing Chelsea's name.
51:22But that doesn't matter.
51:24Because this isn't about me.
51:26Well, you're gonna be
51:28hearing it a lot more.
51:31Seriously, Claire.
51:33I've never felt this way about anybody before.
51:35I think she might be
51:37my person.
51:39If you're happy,
51:41I'm happy.
51:43Truly.
51:45Look, I love you, so
51:47you're my best friend.
51:49And I'm yours, and you are not allowed
51:51to replace me.
51:53You're my best friend.
51:55And I'm yours, and you are not allowed to replace me.
51:57You know there's an app for that?
51:59Best Friend For Hire?
52:01Yeah, but unfortunately, they don't
52:03seem to have anybody as good as you.
52:05I checked.
52:07I'm sorry, too.
52:09I should've told you way sooner.
52:11It's just I was afraid
52:13that you were gonna freak out,
52:15which you did.
52:17And I know Chelsea's probably
52:19the worst person for this to happen with,
52:21but if you guys just gave each other
52:23a chance, I'm sure
52:25you would get along.
52:27Wait.
52:29Chelsea doesn't like me?
52:33But if you like her,
52:35I guess she can't be all that bad.
52:40Now, spill the deets.
52:42You have dirt to catch me up on.
52:44Well, let's just say last night wasn't just
52:46your special night.
52:57you