S41E10 >>> https://dai.ly/x94wg8m
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00:00I'm afraid she has died.
00:02I hesitated at first, but I just didn't want to make a mistake.
00:04All she needed was for somebody to help her.
00:06Can we have some fun?
00:08Yes!
00:10Rush! Rush!
00:12I need your help, man. I need your help.
00:14I can't do this anymore.
00:16We're some time apart.
00:18I love you, but I'm not in love with you.
00:20You can sleep with anyone. Everyone knows that.
00:22Because she's still got dating apps on her phone.
00:24It's true. You don't believe me, do you?
00:26Just go. I'll sleep with her, okay? Go.
00:28Even if she does make a full recovery, we're screwed.
00:30Professionally, ethically.
00:32Oh, it's so good seeing you again, Cam.
00:34And you. Jamie's back.
00:36When I was a kid, he used to make me do things that I didn't want to do.
00:38Jamie raped me.
00:40You know he did.
00:42I'm broken, Cam.
00:44You are broken, too.
00:46Have you heard from Jamie?
00:48Somebody's reported him missing to the police.
00:58Vehicle found in Haverley Gorge.
01:02One patient, driver, search.
01:04I see one male.
01:06No positive identification as of yet.
01:08We'll keep you posted.
01:18Can we confirm the hemp medic is on site?
01:20Helimed 1-3, Charlottes Control.
01:22Helimed 1-3, Charlottes Control.
01:24Making my way down to the crash site there.
01:26I'll update you as and when. Over.
01:28Thank you, Helimed 1-3, Charlie.
01:30Over.
01:32Hello, mate.
01:34Hi. Ian, isn't it? Yeah.
01:36Yeah, Rich, Incident Commander.
01:38How do? What have we got?
01:40So, a vehicle came over the edge there.
01:42We reckon it happened about two or three days ago.
01:44It's not an easy spot from up top.
01:46And no-one really comes down here, so...
01:48Listen, there's...
01:50We can't find a pulse.
01:52And there's no sign of life, so...
01:56Right.
02:02Hello?
02:04Hello, mate. Can you hear me?
02:06My name's Ian from the air ambulance.
02:14Incident Command 2-6-7, this is Control. Over.
02:16Go ahead, Control.
02:18We've got a name match from the plate.
02:20Owner is Jamie Cleveland. Over.
02:22Jamie Cleveland?
02:24I know that name.
02:26Jamie?
02:28Jamie, mate? Can you hear me?
02:32Jamie?
02:34There we go. Good lad.
02:36Jamie, can you hear me?
02:38Right, let's do the oxygen, please.
02:40Right, Helimed 1-3, Charlie.
02:42Code red. Code red.
02:44I need P1 backup.
02:46Code red. I need P1 backup with the helicopter.
02:48This patient is still alive.
02:50Repeat, alive.
02:52He's peri-arrest and he needs blood products down here now.
03:16Yeah, I don't know what to tell you because you're not going to leave it with me.
03:18Sir, this isn't my property.
03:20Sir, I'm going to...
03:22I don't have time.
03:24Unbelievable.
03:26What is?
03:28What is?
03:30What is?
03:32What is?
03:34What is?
03:36What is?
03:38What is?
03:40What is?
03:42What is?
03:44What is?
03:46I've been given a finger.
03:48What? It's not funny, is it?
03:50Oh, my God.
03:52He found it in the park and he's brought it here,
03:54but he's got his dog outside, so she stamped it on me.
03:56Hello?
03:58Is that a finger?
04:00Yes, Siobhan.
04:02OK, well, can somebody please
04:04inform the police?
04:06Right.
04:08Everyone gather round. Eyes on me.
04:10Not the finger. Thank you.
04:12Nothing major to report
04:14from last night. That finger
04:16that you're all gawping at, ignore it.
04:20Cubicles are full.
04:22Rhesus is running low on
04:24morphine. I'll ring the pharmacy
04:26for more. And just to remind you, it's
04:28baby Chloe's memorial today.
04:30I know some of you are going, but
04:32I've sent flowers anyway, so Stevie.
04:34Yeah, just one thing from me.
04:36Several of the ST1s haven't completed
04:38their kneel-bed sutures. By several in this instance,
04:40I mean precisely one.
04:42I'm going to name in shame. Put your hand up
04:44in three, two, one.
04:46Thank you, Nicole.
04:48I want five done by the end of the day.
04:50The training room is not in use, so you'll be in the
04:52staff room. OK, thank you.
04:54Chop-chop.
04:56How old were you, Dee?
04:58Five.
05:00How am I going to manage five? I've not even done one.
05:02We'll practise. Oh, yeah, come on. Let's go.
05:06So you say you hit your head.
05:08Do you feel dizzy now?
05:10OK.
05:12Cam, sorry to interrupt,
05:14but can I have a word, please? Yeah.
05:16One minute. Thank you.
05:18Sean, look, with all due respect,
05:20I don't need a pep talk, OK? I just don't
05:22want to go to the memorial. It's not that, Cam.
05:24They found
05:26Jamie.
05:28Come on.
05:32Let's get her into recess two, please.
05:34OK, this is Tiff Kaczewski, 17.
05:36Suffered significant burns when the tent
05:38she was sleeping in was set alight.
05:40She has approximately 10% partial and full thickness
05:42burns across her arms and back
05:44and some superficial burns across her neck.
05:46Burns have been cooled and dressed.
05:48Mild global wheeze. Airway looks OK.
05:50And no obvious edema.
05:52OK.
05:54Let's get you across onto the bed.
05:56First, Tiff. Tiff, yeah?
05:58Tiff, I'm Dr Nash. This is Nicole.
06:00I'm just going to ease you across onto this bed.
06:02Nice and slow, just in your own time. There we go.
06:04Sorry, Jacob. No worries.
06:06OK, obs are stable.
06:08We have been unable to get IV access,
06:10so she's had 20mg of oral morphine
06:12and 5mg of nebulised ambutamol.
06:14Now on high flow O2.
06:16And she's been incredibly brave,
06:18aren't you, Tiff? OK, good. Thank you, guys.
06:20Right, we're going to get a line in,
06:22get you some pain relief.
06:24Just have a little look.
06:26OK, yeah. I don't think anything's going in there.
06:28Let's try the savinas vein first.
06:30If that doesn't work, we'll go with the foot.
06:32Can you just open your mouth for me?
06:34I want to have a look in your mouth and your nose
06:36to check for any burns or swelling. Thanks.
06:40We've no details beyond the fact that it's a car incident.
06:42Abley Gorge, 30s male,
06:44probable crush injuries.
06:46Well, I heard it was Jamie Cleveland. Do we know what happened?
06:48It is. We don't know, so let's not speculate.
06:50Do you want to get a CT on the phone? Yeah, let them know we're on our way.
06:52Yeah, all right. I don't think you should be in here.
06:54I want to.
06:56Hi, yes, this is Rhesus.
06:58We'll be arriving shortly with a critical patient.
07:00Yeah, yeah, thank you.
07:02You're too involved.
07:04Please.
07:06OK, keep your distance.
07:08You're too involved.
07:10Please.
07:12OK, keep your distance.
07:38Yes, Rita?
07:40Sorry, I need to speak to Jodie quickly.
07:42Yeah, if you're quick, that's fine.
07:44What's up?
07:46You know, I was searching on social media for, you know, Missing Finger Man.
07:48Have you not got anything better to do?
07:50No, shut up. Listen, this just popped up.
07:52Refugee camp in South Sudan has been attacked.
07:54And people have been killed.
07:56OK, which camp?
07:58Hassel, near Juba.
08:00Isn't that where Max...?
08:02Major Banks Police.
08:04With me again, please.
08:06This is Jamie Cleveland.
08:08He's 38 years old.
08:10Approximately two hours ago,
08:12he was found trapped in his car, which we believe
08:14has come off the road, down into a gorge
08:16with a 100-foot-plus fall.
08:18He could have been there for 80-plus hours.
08:20We've got five injuries,
08:22head to toe, occipital hematoma
08:24with boggy mass,
08:26bruising to his left anterior chest wall
08:28with crepitus, left femur
08:30and bilateral crush injuries
08:32to both tip and fib.
08:34I'll hold you there. Shall we slide then?
08:36Ready, steady, slide.
08:38Sorry.
08:40His respirate is low,
08:42requiring support initially with a BVM,
08:44saturating at 85%
08:46on 15 litres.
08:48He's tachycardic
08:50at 123.
08:52GCS is 9.
08:54We've administered a gram
08:56of TXA, 1.2 grams
08:58of quinoxiclav.
09:00He's had two units
09:02of O positive, 2 lyo.
09:04He's had 4 milligrams of
09:06ondansetron and 20 milligrams
09:08of ketamine. That's wonderful. Thank you very much.
09:10Good job. OK, so let's activate the major hemorrhage
09:12protocol, please. Let's lie a response.
09:14Right, OK. Let's get him hooked up to the monitors.
09:16Jodie, please. Jodie?
09:18Can I be excused, please?
09:20It's Max.
09:22Yeah, no, of course, you must.
09:24Somebody else can do the monitoring.
09:26I can do it. You sure? Yeah, I can do it.
09:32Yeah.
09:38Yeah, OK,
09:40that looks like it's completely collapsed.
09:42Lamorna, let's go with the IO.
09:44Nicole, are you OK to prep fluids?
09:46Tiff, I'm just going to ask you to lie back
09:48as much as you can.
09:50There we go, nice and gently.
09:52Right, so,
09:54this is an IO gun.
09:56It looks a lot scarier than it is.
09:58Basically, it means that I can
10:00use this to get a line into your leg so I can give you some
10:02pain relief, OK? But you're not going to feel a thing
10:04because I'm going to numb the area with some lidocaine.
10:06Yeah?
10:08Nicole, you get to stabilise this leg for me.
10:10Cheers.
10:18All right, good.
10:22OK.
10:26There we go.
10:28There we go.
10:30Right.
10:32OK.
10:34The other thing I wanted to say, we're having difficulty getting
10:36through to your next of kin. Is that your mum?
10:40Tiff?
10:42Is there anyone else
10:44we can call for you?
10:46Just Mum.
10:48We don't talk.
10:50She threw me out.
10:54OK, that's all right, we can sort something out.
10:56Right.
10:58Now, this makes a very loud noise, but just ignore it.
11:00You'll be numb, you can't feel anything, can you?
11:02No? Lovely.
11:04So ignore that, look away, think of something nice.
11:08OK, here we go.
11:16OK.
11:18And that's it, it's in.
11:20Right, as soon as I'm done here,
11:22we will chase Bernstein, OK?
11:26That's you. I'm going to leave you with Nicole for the time being
11:28and I will be back as soon as I can.
11:30Oh, thank you.
11:36Six months. Your feet are knackering already.
11:38I didn't ask.
11:46Jamie.
11:48You're in Hobie ED, do you understand?
11:52You've been in an accident.
11:54This one.
11:56We've given you a CT scan
11:58and we can't see any neck fractures,
12:00but I just need you to move your head for me
12:02and then we can clear it.
12:04I'll just lift that up a bit there.
12:06OK, can you lift your head off the bed for me please
12:08and touch your chin on your chest?
12:10Nice and gently.
12:14Lovely.
12:16Thank you, that's lovely. Back down.
12:18Could you look towards me, please?
12:20This way, Jamie.
12:22Good.
12:24Now to the other side.
12:26That's good.
12:30And now could you put, Jamie,
12:32could you put this ear on this shoulder for me, please?
12:34Jamie, can you hear me?
12:38Put this ear on this shoulder for me, please.
12:40You're doing really well.
12:42Really well.
12:44Chiffon.
12:52Chiffon.
13:00Are you thirsty?
13:04I can't give you any water.
13:06You might need to go to theatre.
13:10I could wet your lips for you
13:12if you'd like that.
13:18OK.
13:22Chiffon.
13:52I think he's just keeping healthy fluids, really.
13:54Pam, are you OK?
13:56Yeah. What did the lab results say?
13:58They confirm renal failure, I'm afraid.
14:00I'm sorry, because I think you knew him from before, didn't you?
14:02I don't know him very well.
14:04They're going to start haemofiltration when he goes to ICU,
14:06but shall we catheterise him?
14:08I'll do that.
14:10You monitor hourly urine output.
14:12Why don't you take a moment, yeah?
14:14Take a minute.
14:23It's Dr Piper from Helby AD again, Mrs Kaczewski.
14:26Can you please contact us?
14:28It's about Tiffany. Thank you.
14:32I should have been a vet.
14:34I'm good with animals.
14:36You hate snakes.
14:38Do you know,
14:40I've not managed a single finger suture.
14:42Not one.
14:44How am I going to cope
14:46with a baby?
14:48A baby I didn't even want.
14:50I struggle on my own.
14:52Yes, but you're not on your own, I told you.
14:54I'm here. I've got you.
14:56Yeah.
15:02Ngozi,
15:04you're a friend.
15:08Your friends come and go.
15:20Cam?
15:22Cam?
15:28Cam?
15:30Yeah, Jamie, I'm here.
15:32What happened?
15:44Was it an accident?
15:47Jamie, I need you to tell me, was it an accident?
15:50Or was it Bobby?
15:52Did Bobby do this to you?
15:56Yeah.
15:58Is he talking, Cam?
16:02Bobby. He ran me off the road.
16:04Bobby?
16:06Bobby.
16:08Bobby, OK, well, we've both heard that. Yeah.
16:10Sorry, um, sorry.
16:16Mmm.
16:24Did you sign off my complaint forms?
16:26Yes, sorry.
16:28Didn't mean to ruin your parade.
16:30Parade? I wish.
16:32I appreciate it.
16:34Things are rubbish at home at the minute.
16:36You'd think I'd be able to deal with this stuff
16:38better at my age.
16:40Siobhan, wise up. You're not old.
16:42You're damn right.
16:44So, ladies, how about
16:46dinner next week, us three?
16:48No shop talk, plenty of vino.
16:50I could do with getting hammered.
16:52I'm in.
16:54Obviously, bar the vino.
16:56Don't leave us hanging, Stevie.
16:58Yeah, yeah, sure, why not?
17:00OK, perfect. I'll book.
17:02Cam, excuse me. You all right, love?
17:06Did I actually just agree to dinner?
17:08Well, it's not a bad thing, is it?
17:10Look, I could really do with a drink later,
17:12but can you please, please come and keep me company?
17:14Of course I will. Stevie, I need you.
17:16Reception. Pregnant woman collapsed.
17:20Yeah, I should have listened to you.
17:22I should have kept away from him.
17:24I just can't get the words out.
17:26I feel so weak.
17:30And I hate myself.
17:32I hate what I am.
17:38Go back in.
17:40Get the answers that you need.
17:44I don't think I can.
17:46Listen to me.
17:48If you don't do it now, you might never get the chance.
17:52I won't come in with you if that's what you like.
17:54You don't have to do this on your own.
17:58No.
18:00No, I do, I do.
18:02Cam, wait.
18:04Just remember, OK,
18:06I'm right here, OK?
18:08Yeah.
18:14Do we need to swap him out of resources?
18:16Is he too close?
18:18No.
18:20He's exactly where he needs to be.
18:22Rosie, it's not fair
18:24that you all even make the deal with this.
18:26Baby needs you too.
18:28Just call us.
18:30Have you called Tiff Kaczewski's mum?
18:32Yeah, I've left a few messages, yeah.
18:34OK, good, it works. She's on her way in, so let Tiff know, please.
18:36Yeah.
18:44My neck...
18:46My neck hurts.
19:06What is it?
19:08No.
19:10What is it?
19:18Are you sorry for what you did to me?
19:20And Bobby?
19:26I said nothing.
19:28You know you did.
19:36You listened to Bobby
19:38too much.
19:48You're dying.
19:54No.
20:00It might be today,
20:02it might be tomorrow.
20:06But nobody's going to care.
20:16You will.
20:22You will never forget me.
20:26You're right, I won't.
20:32You were my hero.
20:34I was a child.
20:36But you were for your age.
20:38I was a child, Jamie.
20:40Why would you do that to me?
20:42Why?
20:50Because...
20:56I need to know.
21:00Because you wanted me to.
21:04Because...
21:30I spoke to the charity Max works for.
21:32That was yours. And?
21:36They've not heard from them either.
21:38They just said that sometimes that can happen
21:40and it's pretty chaotic.
21:42They were on a few camps, so...
21:44Whatever happens, we'll deal with it.
21:46Yeah.
21:48No BAs, aren't you?
21:50Nah.
21:52It's how he makes.
21:54What?
21:56That mayonnaise.
21:58I cannot stand the stuff.
22:00You're such a freak.
22:02Yeah, well, I'm your freak.
22:06Yeah, aren't you just?
22:10Erm, Rita might have found us a flat.
22:12Oh yeah?
22:14About time. We should have moved out of Cams ages ago.
22:16I would have.
22:20Max?
22:22No, no, it's Teddy.
22:24She's here.
22:26Dad?
22:28Where have you been?
22:34Tiff?
22:38What do you want?
22:40Your mum is on her way in.
22:44Really?
22:46Yeah.
22:48She'll be here soon.
22:50So maybe you'll have somewhere to be discharged after all.
23:02Cam,
23:04do you manage to speak to Jamie?
23:06Yeah.
23:08And?
23:10I didn't get anything.
23:12I'm sorry, love.
23:14Get the pads on,
23:16let's start compressions.
23:18We've literally just injured him.
23:20We've literally just intubated.
23:34OK, off to the chest,
23:36then let's have a pulse check.
23:40Nothing? No, still PAA.
23:42So back on the chest, please.
23:44We have somebody on the clock?
23:46Yeah.
23:48One gram of adrenaline, please.
24:04Mum.
24:10Who done this?
24:12They don't know.
24:14Um...
24:16Some kids, maybe.
24:18They...
24:20They saw my tent and...
24:24I was asleep.
24:26Animals.
24:28How can one human do this to another?
24:30They're animals.
24:32They should be punished.
24:36Are you in pain?
24:39Are you in pain?
24:43I'm better now you're here.
24:49Are they taking care of you?
24:51Are you being looked after?
24:53Yes.
24:55This is one of my doctors.
24:57Hello, Mrs Kaczewski, I'm Dr Paper.
24:59Or Nicole.
25:01Tiff's been really brave.
25:03Um...
25:05I've just spoken to the burns unit
25:07and they'll be ready for Tiff in theatre soon.
25:17I'm sorry this has happened to you.
25:21This...
25:23This isn't your fault.
25:27And you're here now.
25:29And you're here now.
25:32Aren't you?
25:39Yeah.
25:41Good, good technique.
25:43And I'll get a check x-ray booked first as well.
25:45Stevie, you were needed in resource.
25:47OK, are you going to step in here? Yeah.
25:49Right, well done. That course will be lucky to have you.
25:51Thanks.
25:53Maria, are you OK to carry on?
25:55I just need to check something. Sorry.
25:58PHONE RINGS
26:00So you're still going to go ahead with the course?
26:02No. After everything that's happened?
26:04I said no.
26:06Why would I? It's the last thing I want.
26:09OK, well, I've...
26:11I called and checked on Yasmin.
26:13They've stabilised her vascular bleeds,
26:15her head CT looks normal.
26:18But she hasn't woken up yet.
26:20They don't know why.
26:23I want to see her.
26:25Well, you can't.
26:27Look, I need to.
26:29Tarek, no-one knows that you know her.
26:31Why would you go and see her?
26:34You know her.
26:36You can take me.
26:43Mrs Kaczewski,
26:45the porters are on their way.
26:49You can go up with her if you like.
26:52No, thank you.
26:54I'll leave you to it.
26:56Mum?
26:57You're being looked after by good people.
26:59That is all I wanted to know.
27:01Mum, please.
27:03Say.
27:05You are strong, Tiffany.
27:07I know.
27:09I...
27:11I need you.
27:15Like I needed you
27:17to look after William?
27:20That wasn't my fault.
27:22You got drunk
27:24with your friends.
27:26It was an accident.
27:28He choked in his cot all along because of you.
27:32And I could never forgive.
27:37Because he was perfect.
27:41He was perfect.
27:43And you're not!
27:45No, come on now.
27:47Do not tell me what to do.
27:49When you have your own, then you know.
27:51Until then, you have no idea.
27:56Look after her.
28:06How long is that now, Cam?
28:08Cam, what's the time?
28:10Two minutes.
28:11Two minutes. Off the chest then, please.
28:13I'll check.
28:16OK, back on the chest just for a moment now, I think.
28:19He's gone, hasn't he, from PEA into asystole.
28:23I think we can go for at least 20 minutes
28:26and we've exhausted all of the reversible causes, so...
28:29Unless anybody disagrees,
28:32then I think we can call it a day there.
28:36So, time of death, 13.24.
28:40Thank you, everybody, for your efforts.
28:43Can you give her a second, lads?
28:45Yeah.
28:52You'll be asleep the whole time.
28:55And the surgical team are lovely.
28:57They listen to music and everything.
29:00If you ask them to do it, they'll do it for you.
29:03They'll do it for you.
29:05They'll do it for you.
29:07They'll do it for you.
29:09Music and everything.
29:11If you ask Nath, they'll let you pick.
29:14Simon, he's the anaesthetist.
29:16He really likes Coldplay,
29:18so you probably do want to nip that in the bud.
29:26Why are you being so kind to me?
29:32I've been so horrible to you all day.
29:37You've been scared all day.
29:41I know what that's like.
29:45Well, more what I like than you'd think.
29:48Do you want to know something?
29:51Your mam, she was right about one thing.
29:56You...
29:58..are so much stronger than you think you are.
30:07SIREN WAILS
30:15I put extra sugar in yours.
30:22Go home, Cam. We can manage.
30:25I'm all right.
30:27Honest.
30:30SIREN WAILS
30:36I don't feel any different.
30:42It's like...
30:44..it's like nothing's changed.
30:47Oh, but it has.
30:49He's gone.
30:51He's dead.
30:53Oh, stop. I'm not going to make it.
30:56Sir, we're emergency department staff. Are you all right?
31:00SHE GROANS
31:02She won't.
31:12Hey!
31:14Max is back from the dead.
31:16And you've still got a face like a slapped arse.
31:19Hey, what's wrong?
31:21Are you all right about Teddy?
31:23Yeah.
31:24I feel really guilty. I don't know what to do.
31:27Have you thought about making it official?
31:30Stop faffing, just do it.
31:34Have you seen who's in cubicle two?
31:36No. Who?
31:38The missing finger man.
31:41Can you say that you did this yourself?
31:43I did.
31:45Can I ask why? Yes.
31:47Symmetry.
31:49Did you cut that one off too?
31:51No, this were an accident at work.
31:54OK, well, the good news, Mr Parks, is that somebody did hand in a finger.
31:57So if we assume that it's yours and we assume that it's viable,
32:00then we can make plans to reattach.
32:02No, thanks, I'm not interested.
32:04These are perfect.
32:08OK.
32:10Um, let's give him a tetanus
32:12and 1.2g caramoxyclab IV, I think.
32:15And I will make contact with the ICE team,
32:17just in case you change your mind.
32:19I won't be changing my mind, Doctor.
32:21Right, you are. Cam, can I have a quick word, please?
32:23Yeah.
32:25Shall we beep mental health services?
32:27Yeah. OK.
32:32Are you sure about this?
32:34Oh, yeah.
32:46This is him.
32:48The one I was talking about.
32:50Dr Massam.
32:55Oh.
32:57Yes, yes, that's right, that's me.
33:01We just came to see how you are.
33:06Dr Massam saved my life.
33:10I'm just pleased we could help.
33:12We both are.
33:14Me too.
33:20You're welcome.
33:24Right, we'll leave you to it, let you finish up.
33:42If my GP had just listened,
33:44I mean, really listened,
33:46I wouldn't be sat here wasting your time now.
33:48I told him missing one finger made me skin crawl.
33:53Can I ask what you used to cut it off?
33:55Secateurs from DIY store.
33:58Was that exciting?
34:00I didn't even wait to get home.
34:02I did it in part.
34:04I needed to take back control.
34:07Nobody were going to do it for me, were they?
34:10Take control of what?
34:12My life.
34:14I lost this finger cleaning an industrial ice cream machine.
34:18My fault.
34:20I was depressed and I'd had to drink.
34:22But then, well,
34:24then I got the sack and then I was really depressed.
34:29I was falling apart.
34:31But now I've reset.
34:34Took back control.
34:36I get to start over.
34:38Does that make any sense?
34:40Yeah.
34:42It does. It really does.
34:52I can't believe it.
34:54Me neither.
34:56She's covering for us.
34:59She could have died.
35:01Yeah, but she didn't though.
35:05We were in the clear.
35:07We got away with it, bro.
35:09This can't happen again.
35:11You need to grow up. I'm not babysitting you anymore.
35:13Babysitting me?
35:15Are you joking?
35:17I just... I just covered for you.
35:19I lied to my friends, my colleagues.
35:21I could have lost everything.
35:23That's not fair.
35:25Fair?
35:29Was it fair when I found you half dead?
35:34You've got nothing to say now?
35:37You know, everyone walks on eggshells around you
35:39and no-one even asks about me.
35:41You think... You think you're so much better than me.
35:44The family thinks you're better, I'm the mess-up.
35:47But I'm the one who found you.
35:50I'm the one doing all the carrying.
35:57But you know what?
36:02I'm not doing it anymore.
36:07Yeah, thank you very much.
36:09If it's OK, I'll come and find you at the end of shift, yeah?
36:12OK. Great.
36:20Is there a problem?
36:22Er, no, no, no, no.
36:24I had to... I had a duty to report what Jamie had said
36:27about the guy who ran him off the road, Bobby.
36:30Is he pretty confident they're going to find him?
36:34Is he pretty confident they're going to find him?
36:36They do need a statement from you, but when you're ready, yeah?
36:39OK. OK.
36:41Er, can I get some help here, please?
36:44Er, yeah, yeah. What is it, Mr Parks?
36:46It's back. What is?
36:48My finger.
36:50No, it can't be. Well, I can feel it. It's driving me mad.
36:53OK, please don't touch it. Well, I need to look.
36:55Dylan, sorry. Yeah, I'm here.
36:57My finger's itching. I need it to stop.
37:00Er, OK, um... Come on.
37:03It's something called phantom limb syndrome.
37:05Perhaps in this case, phantom digit syndrome.
37:08It's not there. It just feels like it is.
37:10You know it's not there. You've seen it's not there.
37:13But I can feel it.
37:15It's so real.
37:20This is never going to stop, is it?
37:27Oh.
37:30I thought your shift had finished.
37:32It's staying late.
37:34I'm waiting for a patient to come out of surgery.
37:41Sorry for being a moody cow before.
37:43I didn't mean it.
37:47I know.
37:48You are my friend. Yes, I know that too.
37:54Ah!
37:57Wow, that's going well, is it?
38:01Oh, get lost.
38:05I'm not taking over. I'm just helping.
38:12OK.
38:18That's good. Now you just need to be a bit more direct.
38:21A bit firmer.
38:26Yes.
38:28So, er...
38:30Yes! Yes!
38:32You did it! You did it!
38:34I did it! You did it!
38:36I did it! You did it!
38:50Ngozi, can we have you in recess, please?
38:52You've got paediatric trauma. Thank you.
39:23Right.
39:25What?
39:27Where do you want to go? Up the town?
39:30Up the town? Er...
39:32Yeah, maybe.
39:34Well, Ian's not expecting me back till late,
39:36so you want to try the new rooftop bar?
39:38Mm-hm. Mm-hm. Yep.
39:40Except it's cold.
39:42It's cold? They have here.
39:44What's going on? Where's the let's-go-out vibes?
39:47Go on.
39:49This is dull, but I managed to book a plumber,
39:51and he's on his way. I have to go and let him in.
39:54I'm sorry, can we just rearrange?
39:56OK, fine. Yeah, yeah, I'll just...
39:58Go home. Sorry.
40:00Bye.
40:11Cam.
40:13I found Mrs Donaldson looking for you.
40:16Hi, Cam.
40:18I'm sorry I didn't come to the service.
40:21Doesn't matter.
40:23He just wanted to talk. Would that be OK?
40:26Would another time be better?
40:28Are you busy?
40:31No, erm...
40:33No, now's fine. Now's good.
40:35OK.
40:39What are you going to do, then? Put it straight in the mic?
40:42Yeah. Yeah, later.
40:44Right, come on, don't look back. Yeah.
40:49What happened? It does.
40:52I don't know why Max just didn't tell me to move cams.
40:55Like, all that panic.
40:58I feel like a radio. No.
41:00You were worried anyone would have been.
41:02Yeah, well, that's typical of him to leave me hanging, innit?
41:05That's families. That is what they do.
41:07Yeah, and the messed-up ones.
41:09Show me one that isn't.
41:13Thanks for today. Thanks for being there.
41:18Where else would they have been?
41:21HE SIGHS
41:23What?
41:27Erm...
41:30Do you know when Cam...
41:32..er, accused me of being on the dating app?
41:35Yeah.
41:38I had been on them.
41:42You're joking.
41:44No.
41:47No, I'm not.
41:51HE SIGHS
41:58You...
42:02You were seeing other people?
42:04No. It's not like that, Teddy,
42:07because I didn't know what we were at the start, but I do now.
42:10You do now? Yeah. Yeah, I know what we are now.
42:12So you didn't know when you stayed with me at Jan's?
42:16Or when your dad left and I was there for you?
42:18No, look, it's not that simple. It's not that simple. It is.
42:20Listen to me. Just listen. I'm listening.
42:23I wanted to tell you the truth.
42:25I needed to come clean so we could...
42:27..we could move on.
42:30Not you too, Jones.
42:34How am I meant to trust you again?
42:41No. Exactly.
42:43Exactly.
42:47Teddy.
42:55I didn't think I'd be in here again.
42:58We could go somewhere else if you like.
43:02It's just a room.
43:14I shouldn't have spoke to you the way I did that day.
43:19I made it about me...
43:21..and it wasn't.
43:25I want you to know that I've regretted that day ever since,
43:28and I'm sorry. Truly, I'm sorry.
43:33Not that that changes anything.
43:36Not that that changes anything.
43:42I, um...
43:45..brought you this.
43:47From Chloe's memorial.
43:57I think of it all the time.
44:01I think...
44:03..what was I doing up in that storm?
44:07You could have stayed in.
44:10You just held her.
44:13And then she would still be here.
44:16It wasn't your fault.
44:23I know.
44:27And it wasn't yours.
44:30That's what I wanted to tell you.
44:34You did nothing to cause her harm.
44:38And nothing can be done to save her.
44:40It was...
44:43..Chad's.
44:45But you put your coat down for her.
44:49And you showed her love.
44:52And care.
44:54And care.
44:58In her final moments, and I will never forget that.
45:18Carrier in your heart.
45:43Who the hell do you think you are?
45:45Whoa, what are you doing?
45:47Leave me alone, Rich. I mean it.
45:49Stop. I was missing you. I'm sorry.
45:51What, so you thought you could manipulate me?
45:53Really?
45:55Please meet me. I don't know what I'll do.
45:58Yeah, look, I've had men do this to me in the past,
46:00and it's just not going to happen again.
46:02I didn't mean anything by that.
46:05I was just missing you.
46:07I needed to see you.
46:09You don't know me.
46:11I think I do.
46:13No. I work with Siobhan.
46:15I like Siobhan.
46:17And I love her.
46:19But it's over.
46:21Look, it's the past.
46:23I want a future with you.
46:25I know that I want to
46:27spend time with you.
46:29I know that I want to take you out
46:31and be seen with you.
46:35And I think you want the same.
46:39What do you want?
46:41I can't do this, you're a friend.
46:43Tell me you don't like me.
46:45Tell me I'm wrong.
46:47Tell me that if we didn't meet
46:49we wouldn't be together.
46:54I can't.
47:19I can't.
47:35How did it go?
47:37She said Chloe wasn't my fault.
47:40It never was.
47:43But Bobby is.
47:46I feel like if I was stronger
47:48if I'd have tried to help him when he asked
47:50then maybe he wouldn't have done what he did
47:52and maybe the police wouldn't be looking for him.
47:54You don't know that.
47:56I feel like if I was stronger
47:58then maybe my parents would have supported me more
48:00and maybe if I was stronger
48:04Jamie wouldn't have picked me.
48:06None of this is your fault, Cam.
48:08Do you hear what I'm saying to you?
48:10Do you understand me?
48:12But it happened.
48:14It's still there.
48:17I thought that when Jamie died
48:19that it would be over, it would be finished.
48:21But it's not.
48:23This feeling, it's still in me.
48:26It's what I am
48:28and it's what I'll always be
48:30and I don't think
48:32I don't think I can do anything about it.
48:34No.
48:35Love.
48:39I promise you'll always feel this way, Cam.
48:44I promise.
49:14I promise.