he Kapil Sharma New Episode -- New Show The Kapil Sharma
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00:00Hello. Hello.
00:01Yes. Yes.
00:02Are you ready for the concert?
00:03No problem.
00:04Even if you don't take the harmonium drum, it's fine.
00:05But do keep the gas and the stove.
00:06Yes.
00:07So that as soon as the audience comes with eggs and tomatoes,
00:08you can quickly take the omelette.
00:09Because I can't perform on an empty stomach.
00:10Yes.
00:11Okay.
00:12No, no.
00:13Whoever says it, whoever says it,
00:14I have to give the gift to the teacher.
00:15Tell him clearly no.
00:16I'll bring 10 rupees on stage.
00:1750 rupees.
00:18Okay.
00:19I'll bring 50 rupees.
00:20Okay.
00:21I'll bring 50 rupees.
00:22Okay.
00:23I'll bring 50 rupees.
00:24Okay.
00:25I'll bring 50 rupees.
00:26Okay.
00:27I'll bring 50 rupees.
00:28Okay.
00:29I'll bring 50 rupees.
00:30Okay.
00:31I'll bring 50 rupees.
00:32Okay.
00:33I'll bring 50 rupees.
00:34Okay.
00:35I'll bring 50 rupees.
00:36Okay.
00:37I'll bring 50 rupees.
00:3850 bucks.
00:39He will slap me again.
00:40Teacher, come here.
00:41You sit.
00:42When you know that people beat you, then.
00:46Now tell me one thing.
00:47When you know that people are hitting you,
00:49then why do you go for your concert?
00:51I am not a boatman who is afraid to stand on the banks.
00:55And he never faints,
00:57You know, the cashier you've brought in...
01:00Yes.
01:01On that note, give me a number.
01:04My outgoing is switched off.
01:07Whose number is this?
01:08It's my number.
01:09I have to check.
01:10I hope the incoming isn't switched off.
01:13Ustadji, go.
01:14Sit here.
01:15Oh, Raja sahib, how are you?
01:17Absolutely fine.
01:18Long live Raja sahib!
01:20Raja sahib, please forgive us.
01:23We couldn't pay you this time.
01:25Ustadji...
01:26Ustadji, this is Mr. Raja sahib.
01:28What are you doing?
01:29So, which queen have you made me?
01:35Mr. Raja sahib.
01:36Yes.
01:41Sorry, Mr. Raja sahib.
01:42Please forgive me.
01:43My mother-in-law has a weak eye.
01:44He says his neighbor has a weak eye.
01:47My mother-in-law has a weak eye.
01:49Because once I told my mother-in-law...
01:51I said, mother-in-law, I don't like your daughter.
01:53So she said, look at me.
01:54You'll like my son-in-law.
01:55So I took a look at her.
01:59He is the only fast-charging Ustadji in our neighborhood.
02:02He charges very fast.
02:04Fast-charging?
02:06Where do I get charged from?
02:07Tell me that too.
02:10You get charged from the police.
02:11Everyday someone beats them up.
02:15I'm just fed up.
02:17Fed up.
02:19Fed up.
02:24Ustadji.
02:25Have you come here to talk nonsense?
02:26No.
02:27People from my fraternity have come today.
02:29I would like to talk to them today.
02:31And our show will go on today.
02:32Welcome to Ustad Ghar Chaudas show.
02:36Wow.
02:41Mr. Shabbir Kumar, my first question is for you.
02:43Do you take utensils instead of your old clothes?
02:46Or do you give it to the poor?
02:49Ustadji, don't you feel ashamed?
02:51You are asking for clothes from the guests.
02:52Sir, if I don't take the clothes and don't wear them
02:55then I will feel ashamed.
02:58Anyway, Mr. Ghar Chaudas
02:59I have a request for you.
03:00Whenever you go for a show
03:01take me along with you.
03:03I want to sing along with you.
03:04It's my wish.
03:05You should know something.
03:06You should know music too.
03:07Who said that I don't know music?
03:11I know everything about music.
03:12If you don't believe me, ask me.
03:13If you can't answer, blacken my face
03:15and make me sit on a donkey.
03:16That's it.
03:17Then tell me the tune of Raag Darbari.
03:20Tell me the tune of Raag Yaman.
03:21Tell me whatever you want.
03:23Taxi, you go.
03:24I will come on a donkey today.
03:30Till the donkey comes
03:31I will introduce you to my donkeys.
03:33Changu Mangu Nangu
03:40Ustadji
03:42He has given these three kids.
03:44Come here.
03:45She is a big witch.
03:46God bless you.
03:47God bless you.
03:48If you stay here, my slippers will get dirty.
03:53Sit.
03:55Sit quickly.
04:00I will also sit in front and watch, Ustadji.
04:01Of course.
04:08Let's start.
04:10I am going to tell you a story today.
04:12I went to a wedding concert.
04:15I went there.
04:16I got hungry.
04:17I ate a lot.
04:19I felt sleepy.
04:20I slept on the groom's chair.
04:22Then what happened, Ustadji?
04:23Then
04:24I got beaten up.
04:25I got beaten up.
04:28I got beaten up.
04:29I got beaten up.
04:32I got beaten up.
04:33I got beaten up.
04:37Slap. Slap. Slap.
04:38Slap. Slap. Slap.
04:39Slap. Slap. Slap.
04:40Slap. Slap. Slap.
04:41Slap. Slap. Slap.
04:42Slap. Slap. Slap.
04:43Slap. Slap. Slap.
04:44Slap. Slap. Slap.
04:45Slap.
04:47Then what happened?
04:48Then what happened?
04:49She held my thumb.
04:51She touched it here.
04:53She held my finger.
04:56She touched it here.
04:58Then she held my finger and touched it here.
05:05Then she made my pouch.
05:07She made my pouch and threw it outside.
05:09When I opened my eyes, what was lying in front of me?
05:11What?
05:12Garbage. Garbage. Garbage.
05:13Garbage. Garbage. Garbage.
05:14Garbage. Garbage. Garbage.
05:15Garbage. Garbage. Garbage.
05:16Garbage. Garbage. Garbage.
05:17Garbage. Garbage. Garbage.
05:18Garbage. Garbage. Garbage.
05:19Garbage. Garbage. Garbage.
05:20Garbage. Garbage. Garbage.
05:21Garbage. Garbage. Garbage.
05:22Garbage. Garbage. Garbage.
05:23Garbage. Garbage. Garbage.
05:24Garbage. Garbage. Garbage.
05:25Garbage. Garbage. Garbage.
05:26Garbage. Garbage. Garbage.
05:27Garbage. Garbage. Garbage.
05:28Garbage. Garbage. Garbage.
05:29Garbage. Garbage. Garbage.
05:30Garbage. Garbage. Garbage.
05:31Garbage. Garbage. Garbage.
05:32Garbage. Garbage. Garbage.
05:34He is crying.
05:36He is crying.
05:38He is crying.
05:45Hey, you.
05:50You are not crying, you are just having fun.
05:54I told you not to do this.
05:56I told you not to do this.
05:57I told you not to do this 10 times.
06:00But you told me not to do this.
06:02Sorry. Sorry.
06:04You told me not to do this.
06:05You told me not to do this.
06:07Sorry.
06:09This is the exit.