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00:00The heir of that painting is a young, charming millionaire.
00:04And you will get to know him!
00:06You need to earn his trust completely, so he lets you into his life and his home.
00:11Then, when the time is right, you will steal the painting from a high-security vault inside his house and bring it back to me.
00:19Do y'all remember Eric?
00:20You know, the guy Meredith and I were fighting over the night Mom went into a coma?
00:24The guy who was so hot he made boiling water look cool?
00:27The guy whose smile shone brighter than the sun?
00:29And whose eyes were deeper than the Amazon rainforest?
00:32The guy who...
00:33He looks familiar.
00:34Oh my God, I've kissed this guy once!
00:37Yeah, the guy who stole my heart the minute I saw him.
00:41And then Meredith kissed him!
00:42Do you girls know him?
00:44Not super well, but I'd rate him number 8 on my list of good kissers.
00:47And I've kissed tons of people, so that's pretty high.
00:50Oh, Pierre, you really gotta see his brothers. They look like...
00:53Ugly old girls, I know. I know everything about him. But how well does he know you?
00:58He and his family lived in our neighborhood only for a month.
01:01And that was years ago. I don't think he'd recognize me now.
01:04Yeah, she's not that memorable.
01:06Yeah, we're all still going in disguise.
01:08We have to convince him that you're just a stranger who has randomly bumped into him with no agenda.
01:14Also, he must believe you're very rich, so he doesn't seek your gold digger.
01:18From Pierre, we learned that Eric's mom had passed away at his birth,
01:22and his dad had remarried a woman years later who already had children of her own, the quadruplets.
01:27The world makes sense again. Thank you.
01:30Eric's maternal grandmother recently left the painting to him in her will.
01:35His father is a big business tycoon, so they always have security at the mansion.
01:40But the painting is even harder to access.
01:43The only way you'll make it in and out of there is if you're welcomed into their home.
01:48I couldn't believe that of all the millionaires in the world,
01:51I had to pretend to like Eric, make him fall for me, and then rob him blind.
01:56And how is he even better looking now?
01:58Over the next few days, I took on the identity of Christina Delafour,
02:02a wealthy socialite with a law degree who lived in a beautiful apartment in a posh area and wore only designer braids.
02:08Wow, this Givenchy coat is stunning.
02:10It's Ziv on sheet, you moron.
02:12Okay, jeez.
02:14Also, Pierre, can't someone do a background check on me and easily find out that I did not graduate from Harvard
02:20and that I don't have parents who made a fortune out of selling toilets in India and now live there?
02:25If anyone runs a check, they'll find all this information to be accurate.
02:29I've made sure of it, and no one is interested in the law or toilets.
02:34So, they won't ask you many questions.
02:36Now, show me how to walk in heels like a rich lady.
02:39Fine. Meredith, pass me the Jackie chimchus.
02:42Oh, my God. They'll know you're fake in a second.
02:46I was joking. Relax.
02:48I've hung out with enough rich people to pick up a few things. I got this.
02:51And then, a week later, I was inserted into Eric's life.
02:55We talked over coffee for an hour, and I thought it was going really well.
02:58But when it was time to part ways, he didn't ask for my number and just left.
03:02Ugh, I'd failed to capture his interest.
03:05I'd have to plan another encounter without seeming suspicious.
03:07As I was walking away distracted, I ran straight into a garbage can and stubbed my toe hard.
03:13Son of a biscuit! Holy mother of fudge!
03:16I was still hopping around when I crashed into a woman pushing a stroller,
03:19and a doll went flying out of her hand onto the road.
03:22Just then, the car ran over the doll and turned it into a pancake.
03:25You... you destroyed my child's precious doll!
03:29I'm so sorry. It was an accident. I'll get your little girl a...
03:33Wait, your child is a cat?
03:35Yes. And that was my childhood doll, which I passed on to my baby.
03:40Look, here's some money. Get your baby another doll.
03:43She loves that one, and they don't make those anymore.
03:47Your baby is a cat. She doesn't love that particular doll.
03:50She probably doesn't even love you.
03:52She'd eat your face in your sleep if you weren't the one to feed her.
03:54Now please.
03:55Just then, someone tugged hard at my purse, and I saw a thief running away with it.
04:00You've got to be kidding me!
04:01I took my heels off and sprinted after the thief.
04:04He jumped over a fence into a park and I followed.
04:06I was gaining on him and sent a flying heel at his head.
04:09Just then, someone ran past me, pounced at the thief, and pinned him to the ground.
04:13Gotcha!
04:14Eric?
04:15The park security immediately arrived on the spot and took the thief away.
04:19Aren't you glad I followed you and came to your rescue?
04:21My rescue? I hit him with my shoe to slow him down and was about to catch him,
04:25but then you swooped in at the last minute, and now you want credit?
04:30Whoa, easy. I was just flirting with you.
04:33Oh, sorry. Wait, you said you followed me?
04:37Yeah, I felt stupid that I left without asking for your number.
04:40I definitely want it now.
04:42You became even more interesting when you stubbed your toe, murdered a doll,
04:46yelled at the cat lady, and chased a robber.
04:48Eric and I started seeing each other, and even though I knew it wasn't a real relationship,
04:53it still felt wonderful.
04:55We both hated rom-coms, but were always up for watching horror movies.
04:59We supported different baseball teams and had heated debates about who sucked more.
05:03And we both loved eating from street vendors and walking around the city at night.
05:07I enjoyed his company more than I cared to admit,
05:10and my heart skipped a beat every time he took my hand or gave me a goodnight peck on the cheek.
05:15And then one night, as we watched a firework show in the park,
05:18he pulled me close and kissed me, and I practically melted in his arms.
05:22Soon enough, he told me his parents were hosting a party at their house,
05:26and he wanted to introduce me to them.
05:28This was the first time I'd be in his mansion,
05:31and I needed to make sure I got invited often enough to find out where the vault was.
05:35Eric's dad was lovely, but his stepmom looked at me with a stare so icy,
05:40it could make hell freeze over.
05:42I escaped from the party for a while when the dancing started.
05:44Yeah, that's when Meredith dropped by as Catwoman with a cheeseburger.
05:48But soon enough, Eric came around to call me in for dinner,
05:51where the quadruplets also joined us.
05:53So Eric told us your parents sell toilets in India.
05:56Uh, yeah. It's a great business because everyone needs a toilet, right?
06:00And you know the population of India.
06:02Multiply that with toilets and you have a fortune.
06:04What is the population of India?
06:07Well, I don't have an exact figure.
06:09It's just a lot of people.
06:11Suddenly, I had a queasy feeling in my stomach.
06:14Didn't you get made fun of as a kid?
06:16If you were in my school, you'd be called the Toilet Princess.
06:20Ha ha ha ha!
06:22Grabber Queen!
06:23Duchess of Pooh!
06:24Guys, cut it out. You're not in high school anymore.
06:27Wait a second.
06:29Have we ever met before?
06:31Uh, what? No, I really don't think so.
06:34Oh, God. Why was my stomach churning?
06:36You know I'm really good with faces.
06:38And you remind me a lot of this girl we met in a neighborhood in Connecticut years ago.
06:42Guys, remember? She had a twin sister.
06:46Oh, yeah! I remember those twins vaguely.
06:50The blonde one was prettier, right?
06:52Dang it. Has to be someone else.
06:54I'm an only child and I've always lived in Boston until I moved here.
06:57Yeah, Eric told us you're a lawyer from Harvard.
06:59So who's the baddest person you've put behind bars?
07:02Um, not that kind of lawyer.
07:04I'm actually an environmental lawyer.
07:06I was really feeling sick now.
07:08Maybe it was that burger I ate.
07:10Like you have trees as clients?
07:12What do they pay you with? Leaves?
07:14Ha ha ha ha!
07:16Hey, why are you turning green?
07:18You love trees so much that you're becoming one?
07:20Ha ha ha ha!
07:22Can you guys stop? You're not even that funny.
07:24No, look at her! She's green!
07:26I think I'm gonna hurl.
07:28Eric called the doctor immediately, who said I had food poisoning.
07:31He gave me some medicines and Eric insisted I stay over for the night in one of their guest rooms.
07:36I fell asleep immediately and woke up a few hours later feeling thirsty.
07:41As I made my way down to the kitchen, I realized I had the perfect opportunity to try finding the vault.
07:47Just then, I heard some low voices from some room,
07:50and I slowly crept up to find Eric's stepmom talking to one of the bodyguards in the library.
07:55Were you able to figure out how to unlock the vault?
07:58There's no way. I've tried everything for weeks.
08:01I only have to use a tiny explosive device to destroy the lock.
08:04The vault is all the way up in the attic. No one will hear a thing.
08:08But we have to steal a painting the day after tomorrow while your husband and Eric are away on business.
08:14Are you ready for this?
08:16Just then, he pulled Eric's stepmom into his arms.
08:19I can't wait to run away with you, James. I'm so tired of seeing you secretly, and I'm completely ready.
08:25As the two locked lips, I turned around and tiptoed away as fast as I could.
08:30Okay, so the vault was in the attic, the lock could only be destroyed with an explosive device,
08:34and I couldn't let Eric's cheating stepmom and traitorous bodyguard run away with it.
08:38The next morning, when Eric came to check on me, I decided to tell him the truth for once.
08:43Eric, I have something really difficult to tell you.
08:46I got up last night to get some water, and I heard your stepmom and this bodyguard, James, talking.
08:51They were talking late at night?
08:53Yeah. Do you have some vault in this house with some painting inside?
08:57How do you know that?
08:59That's what they were talking about, breaking in and stealing the painting.
09:02They're planning to do it the day after tomorrow.
09:05And your stepmom said something about running away with James.
09:08I saw them kiss. I'm so sorry. I wish I hadn't.
09:11No, I'm glad you did.
09:13This is gonna be a huge blow for dad, but it would have been much worse if we'd found out everything afterwards.
09:19Thank you for telling me.
09:21And please, keep all this to yourself. I know I can trust you.
09:24Eric kissed me gently before walking away, and two days later,
09:28when the bodyguard and Eric's stepmom were about to escape with the painting,
09:31police officers immediately arrested them.
09:34This is fantastic!
09:36They might link the museum robbery to the bodyguard and stepmom too,
09:40and assume the painting is now safe.
09:42So it'll be easier for you to steal.
09:44Good job, mon cherie. I knew you were the smart twin.
09:47After Pierre left, I sank into my armchair, but then I noticed Meredith staring at me.
09:52What? You should be happy, but you don't look happy. What's up?
09:56Nothing. I just can't wait for this job to be over.
09:59You can steal the painting soon, right?
10:01You know exactly what to do, and Eric trusts you.
10:04By the way, have you two kissed?
10:06I've been dating him for two months. Of course we've kissed.
10:09We text every day, and you never mentioned it.
10:11I didn't know I had to.
10:13So, how is it?
10:15It's fine. It's whatever. It's like kissing anyone.
10:18My memory's a bit fuzzy, but you know I've kissed him.
10:21You never let me forget.
10:22And I definitely wouldn't call it a whatever kind of kiss.
10:26Yeah, okay. It's nice. It's good.
10:28Nice? Good? Oh, wow. Don't make me jealous with all the passion.
10:33Okay, you want to know what kissing Eric is like?
10:36It's like flying through space, like a meteor that explodes into a thousand stars,
10:41and then jumping into really cold water that makes you feel alive all over,
10:46and then feeling warm and tingly down to your toes,
10:49like having hot chocolate next to a fireplace on a snowy winter night.
10:55So, I'm guessing it's better than kissing the pillow you used to practice on.
11:00I did not! Shut up!
11:02You're in love with him, aren't you?
11:04I was about to snap at her again, but then I just sighed.
11:07Yes, I am.
11:09The night of the heist arrived, and I felt sick to my stomach,
11:12but I just wanted to get it over with.
11:14Eric's dad was away, and Eric was holding an important shareholder's dinner
11:17with which most of the household staff was busy.
11:20I'd volunteered to host the dinner with him,
11:22and got ready to leave before their meeting started.
11:25Thanks for your help tonight. You're the best.
11:27Oh, it was nothing. Don't thank me.
11:30So, I'll see you tomorrow at our coffee shop?
11:32It's a date.
11:34As Eric walked away, my heart felt like it was breaking into a million pieces.
11:38This was the last time I'd ever see him again.
11:41I gulped down my tears, and instead of leaving, I sneaked up unnoticed to the attic.
11:46Inside, I found a heavy metal door to a vault.
11:49I took out the tiny explosive device Pierre had given me,
11:52placed it on the lock, and activated it.
11:54In a few seconds, there was a tiny pop and a sizzling sound.
11:57Then, I heard the lock click open.
11:59I walked into a tiny, dark vault and found the painting under a glass case.
12:03Praying to every god that no alarms would go off,
12:06I lifted the case carefully, put the painting in my bag,
12:09and started sprinting down the stairs.
12:11But just as I'd reached the second floor landing,
12:13one of the Ninja Turtles blocked my way!
12:15What are you doing?
12:17Hey, bro!
12:18Uh, you know when I stayed over a few weeks ago?
12:21I dropped a necklace, and I was looking for that guest room,
12:24and I got lost, but it's fine.
12:26I'll just get new earrings. See you later!
12:28I suddenly grabbed my bag and pulled out the painting.
12:31Do you think I'm a moron?
12:33A moron? You? No way!
12:35Sorry, which one are you?
12:36Michelangelo.
12:38Okay, no one has time for that.
12:39Now listen, Mike.
12:40You're definitely the smartest of your brothers,
12:42and just a tiny bit better looking than all of them, too.
12:45We're identical!
12:46That's what they want you to believe.
12:48But I know you're better.
12:50I think you and I can strike a deal, okay?
12:52I'll sell this painting, and you and I can go halfsies on it.
12:56Just give me an account number, and I'll wire the money to you.
12:58No, you're not leaving with it.
13:00Okay, look, dude. I'm doing this for your mom.
13:03I have to sell this painting so I can pay for her bail,
13:05and get her a really good lawyer.
13:07Don't you want that?
13:08No, my mom's in jail because she did something wrong,
13:11and she abandoned us all.
13:13She shouldn't have stolen Eric's painting.
13:15What do you care about Eric?
13:16Don't you hate Eric?
13:18He's so good looking, and smart, and perfect,
13:21and gets all the ladies.
13:22It makes you guys look even worse than you really are.
13:25You should want to hurt him.
13:26So let me take the painting.
13:28That'll really hurt him.
13:30Eric's the best brother in the world, and I love him.
13:33Okay, okay. I have an offer you can't refuse.
13:36How about I become your girlfriend?
13:39I bet you've never had one.
13:40I'm gay.
13:41Jesus!
13:42All right, I surrender.
13:44Just one last thing.
13:45Without warning, I punched his face so hard
13:48that he went reeling back with shock and dropped the painting.
13:51Then I kicked him into a room and locked the door shut.
13:54I'm sorry, Mikey. You're a really good guy.
13:56I sprinted down another flight of stairs
13:58and jumped out of the first story window.
14:00I ran across the garden to the fountain,
14:02climbed the tree next to it,
14:03jumped onto the wall,
14:04and then landed softly outside on all fours.
14:07Just as I got up, I found myself facing Eric.