A homeless woman entered my taxi and asked me to drive to a certain address. I own a business class cab, and whether they have money or not, homeless people are bad news. I tried to kick her out, but failed, and was forced to call the cops.
As I went after a police officer, the woman changed clothes, turning into what looked like a rich young lady. Because of that, the cop didn't believe me.
I had to take her to an expensive restaurant, where she said she had a date with a millionaire. A few hours later, as I waited for new customers, a man in an very nice suit entered the taxi and told me to go to a poor neighborhood. After that, he started bragging about how he pretended to be rich during a date and ran off just so he wouldn't have to pay the bill. I immediately realized that he had dinner with the poor homeless woman from earlier, and I couldn't let it go...
As I went after a police officer, the woman changed clothes, turning into what looked like a rich young lady. Because of that, the cop didn't believe me.
I had to take her to an expensive restaurant, where she said she had a date with a millionaire. A few hours later, as I waited for new customers, a man in an very nice suit entered the taxi and told me to go to a poor neighborhood. After that, he started bragging about how he pretended to be rich during a date and ran off just so he wouldn't have to pay the bill. I immediately realized that he had dinner with the poor homeless woman from earlier, and I couldn't let it go...
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FunTranscript
00:00To Hotel Plaza, please. Let's go.
00:04Get the hell out of here, bum. You'll dirty the whole interior.
00:08Thank you. I have 500 bucks.
00:14I will repeat. Get out of here.
00:17No! Where do you have to refuse me? I'm a client.
00:21I will show you what are you entitled to, a client.
00:25But I had no idea who I was dealing with.
00:28It's a business class cab. And she's a homeless.
00:32She's already... I tried to get rid of her, but I just cannot.
00:35So maybe you could somehow help me with it.
00:48What the hell?
00:51What the hell?
00:53Excuse me, officer. Is something wrong?
00:56Well, your driver told me that you are a...
00:59Do you know what should I do to get right with him?
01:04Listen, I don't know what's wrong with you, dude.
01:06But if I were you, I would take this lady wherever she wants to go.
01:09Just look at her.
01:10Sir, but...
01:11What's wrong with you?
01:14Have a good day, ma'am.
01:17Why do you need all of this? You're a back lady.
01:20Because this back lady has a date with a millionaire.
01:27Dumbskin.
01:29Who knew that in a few hours I will find myself in the same bed with this homeless woman?
01:35I'm Michael and this is my story.
01:38I'm sorry.
01:45I'm so glad we finally met.
01:49You look even more charming in real life than in your Tinder photo.
01:54Oh my God, it's so expensive. Why?
01:58When in the presence of a beautiful woman, money is no object.
02:04I feel like I'm in a fairytale, which I've always dreamed about.
02:09No, the tale is just beginning.
02:12Cheers.
02:21I'll be right back.
02:29One might ask, what am I in this fairytale?
02:32Well, everything became clear as soon as a new passenger appeared in my car.
02:39Can you give me a ride to Bronx, buddy?
02:41I would never guess that you live in Bronx.
02:43Dude, let's talk.
02:44Gotta get out of here.
02:46Wait, did you rob someone?
02:48No, relax.
02:50I just had dinner with a lady.
02:52She thinks I'm a millionaire.
02:54You know what's even funnier?
02:56She had to head over the hills in love with me.
02:59How does she look like?
03:01Are you a driver or a freaking Sherlock Holmes?
03:04Let's go, damn it!
03:07He didn't have to say it.
03:09I knew that was the same homeless girl.
03:14Ma'am, I'm sorry, but my shift is coming to an end.
03:17You need to pay this bill.
03:19Oh, yeah, I'm just waiting for the guy who I came with.
03:25Ma'am, you said the same thing an hour ago.
03:28So, either sell up now or you have to call the police.
03:34How much?
03:42What about you bringing us a bottle of champagne?
03:53While we are young.
03:59You, what are you doing here?
04:01Definitely I didn't come here to drink a champagne.
04:03Ah, no, sir.
04:04Please send it to 310 and put it in the bill.
04:08Rome, what the hell are you doing?
04:11You can come with me or you can start to think how you're going to pay for this bill.
04:19Will you finally explain to me what's going on?
04:24Oh, my God.
04:27Oh, my God.
04:29What have you done to him?
04:31Johnny, I was wondering where you went.
04:34Oh, let me, let me help you.
04:37Oh, this mad taxi driver tied me up.
04:40He tried to run away from the dinner, so you're supposed to pay for everything.
04:44Oh, don't believe him. It's all fake.
04:46How do you know then that he's a taxi driver?
04:50How could you?
04:55I thought you had really feelings for me.
04:57Do you know that she spent all her money to please you?
05:00She's a homeless.
05:02What?
05:06Did I go on a date with a bum?
05:09A hostage, a huge restaurant bill, an expensive room.
05:14What should I do now?
05:20Now...
05:22No, no!
05:23It's time to drink a champagne, yes.
05:25With me.
05:27What?
05:29Yeah, we will stay here until tomorrow morning and then we'll get out.
05:34Why are you doing all this for me?
05:37Because I'm trying to shake off the feeling that I'm a jerk
05:39because of everything that I have told you before.
05:42What?
05:48Sir?
05:53I looked at her and thought,
05:55what kind of idiot would you have to be not to see how cool she is?
06:00This girl from the street was worth the most expensive dinners,
06:03hotels and true love that she so longed for.
06:13Morning.
06:15Morning.
06:20Damn!
06:21God, you look so romantic together.
06:25It's a pity that in prison you'll be sitting in separate cells.
06:29Bastard.
06:30Untie us.
06:31No.
06:32But there is a plus.
06:34Most likely you will do the same amount of time in prison
06:37so you can see each other when you get out.
06:40You can see each other when you get out.
06:42Enjoy paying for everything, suckers.
06:46Okay, we need to do something.
06:49They will eventually come here.
06:51I know what to do.
06:53What?
06:54I will take everything upon myself.
06:58What?
07:00Michael, I'm homeless.
07:02I have nothing, so I have nothing to lose.
07:05Are you out of your mind?
07:06Let's assume that it's a gratitude to the only man who took care of me.
07:11But I couldn't let that happen.
07:15Who's that?
07:20Sir, it's time to check out.
07:22Sir.
07:23Oh, God.
07:24What's going on here?
07:25Yes.
07:26This is what I want to ask you.
07:28Yes?
07:29We are doing here some role playing and you interrupted us.
07:31What?
07:32Untie us immediately.
07:34What?
07:35Okay, so I want to see your manager then.
07:37Oh, no.
07:38Yes?
07:39I'm sorry.
07:40No, you're supposed to respect somehow the rules of your guests.
07:42Yes, yes, yes.
07:44You know, I just wanted to...
07:47Apologize.
07:48Yes, perfect.
07:49Because you already embarrassed us incredibly and it's time right now to make it right.
07:54Okay, yes, of course.
07:56Room and your account will be taken care of, okay?
08:00Okay, but it's not enough.
08:02What?
08:03What?
08:04It's not enough.
08:05You also destroyed the vacation of this incredible woman.
08:09And do you know how hard it is?
08:11You think that it's easy to redeem?
08:14No, so what about having another weekend in this incredible room?
08:19Yes.
08:24Enjoy your stay, sir.
08:26Ma'am?
08:28Thank you.
08:29Thank you.
08:32Did you lose your mind?
08:34Why did you do that?
08:36For you.
08:37Because I thought that you need to have at least a few more fairytale dates.
08:42No, you deserve it.
08:44And you?
08:46What about me?
08:47I don't think you need me.
08:49Well, already I had a muller.
08:54And it was completely fiasco.
09:01So maybe I should search for luck with an ordinary route.
09:08Taxi drive.
09:11At that moment, I understood.
09:13Anytime you think that you are better than someone else,
09:16when you think that you can humiliate a person, think about it.
09:20Your true love may be standing right in front of you.