The Real Bros of Simi Valley: The Movie (2024)

Short Drama 4U

The Real Bros of Simi Valley is an American scripted television series based in Simi Valley, California. The satirical comedy both pays homage to and lampoons the culture of Southern California, and several stereotypes and tropes of unscripted reality shows, with hyperbolic emphasis on exaggerated dramatic elements, and canned infighting among the show's cast.

Transcript

00:00:00It's me, your boy, Zon.

00:00:05Zon.

00:00:06I've been in the CME my whole life.

00:00:07Everything I need is right here.

00:00:08My girl.

00:00:09Will you marry me?

00:00:10Oh, my God, yes.

00:00:11My family.

00:00:12What do you know?

00:00:13Open that, Jen.

00:00:14My truck.

00:00:15Oh!

00:00:16But most importantly, my boys.

00:00:17Give it up for Bryce Meyer.

00:00:18Bryce, please, get down.

00:00:19We're your friends.

00:00:20We care about you.

00:00:21Oh, my God.

00:00:22Oh, my God.

00:00:23Oh, my God.

00:00:24Oh, my God.

00:00:25Oh, my God.

00:00:26Oh, my God.

00:00:27Oh, my God.

00:00:29I'm sorry.

00:00:30Get down.

00:00:31We're your friends.

00:00:32We care about you.

00:00:33Oh!

00:00:34I want to pull the plug.

00:00:35Where's the plug?

00:00:37You're not hooked up to any.

00:00:38That's sort of the TV.

00:00:39What's up?

00:00:40I'm Wade.

00:00:41Wade!

00:00:42What the hell are you doing?

00:00:43Dad, get the fuck back inside, okay?

00:00:44I'm doing art.

00:00:45Pretty much just kicking with my brother and his friends

00:00:46because everyone at my age fucking sucks, dude.

00:00:47Wanna hit the show?

00:00:48Nah, dude.

00:00:49Do you, uh, do you not burn?

00:00:50Wait, you don't burn, Wade?

00:00:51Oh, my God, dude, I fucking burn, okay?

00:00:52Duncan!

00:00:53What the fuck was that about?

00:00:54I'm sad, Dad.

00:00:55I'm sad.

00:00:56Oh, my God.

00:00:58Can't you see how sad I am?

00:00:59What if you ran, like, a surf shop without your dad?

00:01:02If you were to tell me five years ago

00:01:03that I was going to open up a surf skate shop

00:01:05with Johnny Mendez, I would have said,

00:01:07you're crazy, brother.

00:01:08Yo, Tessa, will you marry me?

00:01:10I'm down.

00:01:11I don't think I can get married right now.

00:01:12She just broke off the engagement or whatever, but.

00:01:14Now that I know that Dani's the real blunt mastermind,

00:01:16it's like, have I been in love with her this whole time?

00:01:18Dani, you need to choose right now, or we're done.

00:01:21Then I guess we're done here.

00:01:23Well, it's safe to say I'm officially

00:01:24the most dumped guy in Simi.

00:01:26I'm pregnant.

00:01:28What do you mean?

00:01:28And if it's a guy, we're naming him Chez, Dax, or Hawk.

00:01:32Good breast, you want to hold him?

00:01:33No, I'm good.

00:01:33Xander's my boy, but not this hawk fool.

00:01:35Who deserves to be locked in a hot car

00:01:37with the windows rolled up?

00:01:38Toaster, Evan.

00:01:39Are you kidding me?

00:01:40I'm going to toast your child.

00:01:41You're going to toast my child?

00:01:41I'm going to toast him.

00:01:42Just thinking about it, you know,

00:01:44we were pretty sick in high school.

00:01:45I mean, we were really cool in high school.

00:01:47Obviously, we were super sick in high school.

00:01:50God, high school was so sick.

00:01:51I'm sorry, but high school was so sick.

00:01:56You got the money?

00:02:24For sure.

00:02:27And it's 100% legit?

00:02:29You ask a lot of questions.

00:02:32That was one question.

00:02:33Let's put it this way.

00:02:35This transaction is about as legit as my belt.

00:02:39No offense, but I can't tell if your belt is legit or not.

00:02:45Listen here, Snow Cone, this isn't the only Backstreet

00:02:48Bayou bargain I got for today.

00:02:50I got a 130 Camarillo.

00:02:52So Blaine, or no, Blaine, or no, Blaine,

00:02:55So Blaine, or no, Blaine.

00:03:01I just got to make a quick call.

00:03:03Very well, then.

00:03:09Yo.

00:03:10Yo.

00:03:11Wait, there's no time to explain,

00:03:13but I need you to get everyone to the house now.

00:03:15It's an emergency.

00:03:25All right, class, if Aaron beats this level without losing,

00:03:45no homework for a week.

00:03:46Yo, don't blow this for us, Aaron.

00:03:47Oh, shut up.

00:03:51What's up?

00:03:52Yo, dude, Zan just hit me.

00:03:54He said he needs all of us at the house ASAP Rocky.

00:03:56Sounds like a huge deal.

00:03:58An HD?

00:03:59Yeah, like a 4K HD.

00:04:02Holy cannoli.

00:04:03That's quite the Leland Sitch.

00:04:04Yeah, man, like a Sabrina the Teenage Sitch.

00:04:07And that's on gang?

00:04:08Yeah, that's on our Lord and Savior, Jesus H. Christ.

00:04:11Good God.

00:04:13Oh, one sec.

00:04:14Dunkin's calling.

00:04:15Dunk, you're on with Wade.

00:04:16Wade, I just got your text.

00:04:17What the H-E-double hockey sticks is going on, dude?

00:04:20Is it actually a 4K HD?

00:04:21From what Zan was saying, sounds like it might be an 8K.

00:04:258K?

00:04:26Are you cranking my shaft, dude?

00:04:28What, is he dying or something?

00:04:31Hold on, Johnny's calling me.

00:04:32Hang up, hang up, deny it, deny it.

00:04:35Yo, I think you just accidentally denied my call.

00:04:37Johnny, it wasn't an accident.

00:04:38I don't have time to explain, but we need

00:04:40to get to Zan's immediately.

00:04:42Wait, what is going on?

00:04:43I told you to grab the crossbow.

00:04:45We don't have a crossbow.

00:04:46The last time Zan assembled the squad on some emergency

00:04:49situation-type vibes was back in 08

00:04:51when a bunch of randos showed up at Lexi's party,

00:04:53and Zan almost knocked Mike Schaefer.

00:04:55So yeah, you could say I'm prepared for battle right now.

00:04:57Bryce, what's going on?

00:04:58I think Zan has ass cancer.

00:05:00What?

00:05:00Don't say that.

00:05:01That is not funny.

00:05:02I mean, he might.

00:05:03Dude, shut the fuck up, Bryce.

00:05:04Dude, you shut the fuck up.

00:05:05Hold me back.

00:05:06You want to do this right now?

00:05:07I have a literal bath, dude.

00:05:08I will kill you.

00:05:09Don't put that back.

00:05:10No lessons.

00:05:10Come on.

00:05:11So I don't know what's going on right now,

00:05:13but the vibe is high-key stressful.

00:05:15All my serotonin got replaced by straight-up anxiety, bro.

00:05:18It's a ride, bro.

00:05:19Is that guy revving at us?

00:05:25Who's that?

00:05:27Uh-oh.

00:05:28God damn it.

00:05:31I don't like this, guys.

00:05:33Am I going to have to knock this truck?

00:05:41Check it out.

00:05:43Wait, wait.

00:05:44Is that what this is all about?

00:05:46Yeah.

00:05:53New truck, baby.

00:05:56Dude, lately, Molly and I have been on really bad terms,

00:06:00and I've been feeling super down.

00:06:01So I thought, what better way to solve this relationship issue

00:06:05than with a brand new truck?

00:06:07Did you know about this?

00:06:08Nope.

00:06:09Dude, this looks so expensive.

00:06:11Dude, it was.

00:06:11Guys, we had to empty out the savings real quick.

00:06:14Let's go.

00:06:15That's so tight.

00:06:16Look at the lift on this puppy.

00:06:18This is noticeably bigger than the whole thing.

00:06:20Dude, keep the specs on these handles.

00:06:21Hell yeah, Xander.

00:06:23Sick truck.

00:06:24Thank you, Dani.

00:06:25Straight up.

00:06:26Appreciate you.

00:06:27Thank you, Dani.

00:06:27Oh.

00:06:28Dan, can I call you for a chat?

00:06:33Xander has always had a habit of making

00:06:35really impulsive purchases without telling me.

00:06:37And I'm not talking casual things.

00:06:39I'm talking huge tattoos.

00:06:40Oh my god.

00:06:41A motorcycle, a parabolic microphone,

00:06:44and now this truck that looks exactly like his old truck?

00:06:48We've had so many conversations about it

00:06:50that this is just starting to feel like the last straw.

00:06:55What's up?

00:06:56What's up?

00:06:57You didn't think to tell me that you just

00:06:58emptied our entire savings account

00:07:00to buy yourself a new truck?

00:07:02I didn't empty the entire savings.

00:07:04There's still like $500 in there.

00:07:05Xander, that is so whack.

00:07:07I did this for us.

00:07:09No.

00:07:09You did this for you.

00:07:11And now, I'm about to do something for me.

00:07:16Molly, I swear to God, if you take that ring off right now,

00:07:19Molly.

00:07:20Yo.

00:07:22Check this out.

00:07:23This is big.

00:07:25What is it?

00:07:25Just found this in the mailbox.

00:07:27You are cordially invited to the See Me High 10-year reunion.

00:07:33No way.

00:07:34Oh my god.

00:07:35Oh my god.

00:07:36Oh my god.

00:07:37Oh my god.

00:07:38Oh my god.

00:07:39Oh my god.

00:07:41What?

00:07:41I'm straight up over the moon right now, dude.

00:07:43Like, I've been waiting for this day

00:07:44since we graduated high school.

00:07:46I totally thought they were going

00:07:47to cancel it because of the pandy.

00:07:48Remember the pandy?

00:07:49Dude, the pandy was so randy.

00:07:51Feel like it's not that show to call it the pandy?

00:07:54Yo, it's only three weeks away.

00:07:55Do you ever check your mail?

00:07:57Dude, honestly, I didn't even know we still got mail.

00:07:59Yo, but I'm so pumped for the reunion.

00:08:01Yeah.

00:08:02Yeah.

00:08:03I'm not pumped for the reunion at all.

00:08:06I just lied to every single person's face

00:08:08in that driveway.

00:08:09In reality, I've low-key been stressing this day for years.

00:08:12All my friends were in the class of 010

00:08:14since everyone my year fucking sucked.

00:08:16And I didn't technically graduate

00:08:17till a couple years later.

00:08:19But I need to make sure I get an invite somehow.

00:08:21We're going to go get some kickback stuff.

00:08:22We'll be right back.

00:08:24Love you.

00:08:24Love you so much.

00:08:26Obviously, Molly and I were on the precipice

00:08:28of potentially ending our marriage for good.

00:08:31But after getting such joyous news,

00:08:33we just decided to put all that on hold,

00:08:35ride this high, and have a celebratory kickback at the pad

00:08:38despite it being 11.40 AM on a Wednesday.

00:08:48Is he going to hit that?

00:08:49We'll be right back, dude.

00:08:51There's a little bit of a learning curve with this.

00:08:53He'll get there.

00:08:56Let's go, dude.

00:08:58Let's go.

00:08:59We're about to show up and flex so hard on all these fools.

00:09:03Dude, facts.

00:09:04This is like the day we've all been waiting for,

00:09:06like our whole lives.

00:09:07Honestly, if I could say so, I feel elated.

00:09:10Look at my hand.

00:09:12That's how elated I am.

00:09:13I'm shaking, bro.

00:09:14Wow, dude.

00:09:14Dude, right?

00:09:15I feel elated too.

00:09:18Yeah, Dunk?

00:09:19You elated?

00:09:21Yeah, obviously.

00:09:23Really, Duncan?

00:09:25You're elated?

00:09:26I just said I was elated, and now you're suddenly

00:09:29feeling elated as well?

00:09:30I feel giddy AF right now, bro.

00:09:33Yeah?

00:09:34Even though you're dating Danny and Tessa,

00:09:36but at the end of the day, you've got to pick

00:09:37one for the reunion, which means the other one's

00:09:39just going to be mad pissed.

00:09:40They're probably both going to be super pissed at you.

00:09:43Damn, dude.

00:09:45It's not like I was planning on dating Danny

00:09:47and Tessa at the same time.

00:09:49Should I have said no to one of them

00:09:50when they both asked to get back together at Zan's wedding?

00:09:53Maybe we should give it another shot?

00:09:55Yeah, I'm down.

00:09:56Would you be willing to put the past behind us

00:09:57and give this another shot?

00:09:59100%.

00:10:00Yeah, I probably should have.

00:10:02Probs.

00:10:02But it's a wedding.

00:10:04Like, I was so fired up on love.

00:10:06I was torqued on love, dude.

00:10:08You know who else isn't hyped?

00:10:09Whed.

00:10:10What?

00:10:11Dude, I am hyped.

00:10:12I'm so hyped.

00:10:12You're not even invited.

00:10:13All right, Bryce, chill out, dude.

00:10:15Zan, this truck is so lifted, bro.

00:10:16I feel so high above the ground.

00:10:18I know, right?

00:10:19Can you imagine a more lifted truck?

00:10:20I can't.

00:10:21I can't.

00:10:22Dude, I know.

00:10:23I feel so high too, which I'm, like, very

00:10:25familiar with that feeling.

00:10:26So in the past, you know, I've gotten a lot of heat

00:10:28for quote, unquote, not burning, which is crazy,

00:10:32because, like, I'm, like, the biggest stoner in the world.

00:10:34So I try to name all the ways I get high on the regular.

00:10:38Bong, peace, bubbler, gravity bomb.

00:10:42Let's talk about this monster fridge in the center.

00:10:45Are you JK-ing me right now?

00:10:47Are you JK-rolling me?

00:10:48Pretty sick, huh?

00:10:49Yeah, that's a nice toss.

00:10:50Dude, you are definitely going to take

00:10:52home the Truck of the Year trophy.

00:10:56Every year at the Simi High 10-year reunion,

00:10:59they give the person with the dopest truck

00:11:00the Truck of the Year prize.

00:11:03That's a BFD.

00:11:04My dad won it at his reunion.

00:11:06His dad won it at his reunion.

00:11:09I'd be lying if I said winning that trophy hasn't

00:11:11always been a dream of mine.

00:11:13I don't want to jinx it, but with this new BBT,

00:11:18this big black truck, I 100% have this thing in the back.

00:11:23Yo, peep this custom horn I recorded.

00:11:25Boom, bitch!

00:11:26Truck of the Year coming through!

00:11:28Oh!

00:11:29Oh, my god!

00:11:30Oh!

00:11:33Oh, my god.

00:11:34Look at this truck.

00:11:36Dude, is that even street legal?

00:11:37It's got to be a professional dirt bike here, right?

00:11:43Zed?

00:11:45Jat you?

00:11:47Brocco Zamboni?

00:11:48Slap my ass and call me a bad boy.

00:11:50Is that Bryce Meyer?

00:11:52What is up, boys?

00:11:53What up?

00:11:53Dude, what's so sick about Simi is that it's so small,

00:11:57you can just run into people and be like,

00:11:59yo, what's up?

00:11:59Yo, what's up?

00:12:00Yo, what's up?

00:12:02You can just run into people from your high school

00:12:03when you least expect it.

00:12:05Jat US and his squad were the baseball bros in our class,

00:12:08and we had an alliance in case something ever

00:12:09went down with the football bros or the field hockey girls.

00:12:13Solid B team.

00:12:14Seems like they're doing pretty well now, though,

00:12:16which is dope.

00:12:18You know, I don't necessarily think

00:12:20his truck is better than mine.

00:12:22It's just different.

00:12:24They're both sick trucks.

00:12:26Yo, I saw on IG you guys have been killing

00:12:28it in the real estate game.

00:12:29Yeah, we're high-key slinging pads these days.

00:12:31Hey, where are you fools headed with all this stuff?

00:12:34Dude, we're coming back from Tahoe.

00:12:36Gord's got a place up there.

00:12:37We took the jet skis out, split a quad of shrooms,

00:12:40got some sick, epic drone footage,

00:12:42jump in the hot springs.

00:12:43So sick.

00:12:44That's like the sickest sentence I've ever heard in my life.

00:12:46But yo, we're about to head up to Jat US' crib

00:12:48to celebrate the reunion.

00:12:49You guys should cruise.

00:12:50Let's black out.

00:12:51You guys are cruising to the reunion?

00:12:53Yeah, dog, of course.

00:12:55Coming for that truck of the year trophy.

00:12:57That's dope, dude.

00:12:59That's super dope.

00:13:01Gee whiz, is that sick?

00:13:04Yo, did you just say gee whiz?

00:13:06I know Xander's trying to be chill right now,

00:13:08because Jathew just pulled up in like an absolute rig.

00:13:10But as soon as he said gee whiz, gee whiz, is that sick?

00:13:15I knew that fool was flustered.

00:13:16Not going to lie, I'm pretty flustered myself.

00:13:18You know, that sounds chill, but we're actually

00:13:20having a low-key kicker at our pad,

00:13:22so we can't cruise to yours.

00:13:23Thanks, though.

00:13:24Oh, gee whiz.

00:13:26Oh, Jets pull up, man.

00:13:27It's right up the street.

00:13:28Besides, the squad would love to see the see-me legends.

00:13:32I mean, we are legends.

00:13:33We are legends.

00:13:34Just got a good-ass point.

00:13:36All right, yeah, we'll cruise through for like 5 to 10.

00:13:38Nice!

00:13:39Yeah, let's go!

00:13:41All right, follow me, all right?

00:13:43Yeah.

00:13:44Woo!

00:13:45Woo!

00:13:54I wonder what the boys are up to.

00:13:56What's taking them so long?

00:13:57Probably just whacking off to Xander's truck

00:14:00and talking about how sick it's going

00:14:01to be when we pull up to the reunion in Xander's truck,

00:14:04because that's the only thing he cares about is his truck,

00:14:07and that's it.

00:14:15What?

00:14:17Are you good?

00:14:19I mean, I guess this whole reunion thing just

00:14:20has me thinking, like, what's my truck, you know?

00:14:24You have that little Tacoma, though, right?

00:14:26Not literally, Johnny, idiot.

00:14:29Like, metaphorically.

00:14:31Who cares?

00:14:32We were dope then.

00:14:33We're even doper now.

00:14:35Seriously.

00:14:35Yeah, we had the sickest squad in high school by far.

00:14:38Exactly.

00:14:39And as someone who's been getting

00:14:40really into manifestation lately,

00:14:42I think it could be really good for you malls.

00:14:45Think about it.

00:14:46My Taylor Swift heiress tour floor seats,

00:14:49I thought of them.

00:14:50I sent the ticket link to my mom.

00:14:53I got the tickets.

00:14:54I manifested that.

00:14:56Oh, really, Dani?

00:14:58Did you manifest all of your things?

00:15:00Are we just going to pretend that your grandpa isn't

00:15:02the inventor of the wall mount and your family's

00:15:05not worth $50 million?

00:15:08I swear to God, if this bitch says one more

00:15:11word about manifestation, I will straight up choke her out.

00:15:15That is so true.

00:15:16Manifestation's like a really helpful tool.

00:15:18So Dani, we finally going to meet your secret lover

00:15:21boy at the reunion?

00:15:22Oh, Tessa, I guess it could be a good time.

00:15:28What about you, Tessa?

00:15:29We haven't met your man either.

00:15:32Oh, yeah.

00:15:34Maybe we should not do that for the reunion, though.

00:15:36And maybe that's definitely not the move

00:15:38for the reunion, for sure.

00:15:39And that, and we all agree?

00:15:41Hey, Johnny, can I pull you for a chat?

00:15:44Mm-hmm.

00:15:45Good.

00:15:47I know it's none of my business,

00:15:48but you need to get it together.

00:15:50What are you talking about?

00:15:51The last three date nights with me and Duncan,

00:15:53he said to leave early because you've been

00:15:55messing things up at the shop.

00:15:57Like, what could you be messing up so bad at midnight?

00:16:02I want to have Duncan's back and stuff,

00:16:03but he's come up with this slanderous narrative

00:16:05that I'm bad at my job to use as an excuse

00:16:08of why he's always, like, with the other girl.

00:16:11Bro, I'm starting to hurricane harbor

00:16:12some resentful energies.

00:16:13I'm not going to lie.

00:16:14But at the same time, I got to hold it down for my boy.

00:16:17Now I remember.

00:16:18I do mess things up every night.

00:16:20Oh, really?

00:16:21Around 1130, I start messing things up.

00:16:24Figure it out, because I'd hate for things

00:16:26to have to get physical.

00:16:27Me too.

00:16:31Bro, I barely even flinched, bro.

00:16:32Like, I was honestly flinching about something else

00:16:35that I was remembering, like, a scary thing in the moment.

00:16:38I'd knock Danny.

00:16:39Easy.

00:16:40Johnny?

00:16:41Yeah?

00:16:41Can I pull you?

00:16:43For sure.

00:16:44Tessa, on the other hand, I worry about Tessa.

00:16:52This is the backyard.

00:16:54Oh my god, dude.

00:16:55I can't believe this is your pad.

00:16:58Yo, dude, they have Franco's Tacos catering here.

00:17:00That's such a flex.

00:17:01Man, look who it is.

00:17:04Dan!

00:17:05What's Gucci?

00:17:07Here, have a nice cold beer.

00:17:09Whoa.

00:17:10OK.

00:17:12Oh my god, they're so cold.

00:17:13Oh my god, it's been so long.

00:17:16For sure, yeah.

00:17:19I'm sorry, do I know you from somewhere?

00:17:22Who the f*** are you?

00:17:25Really?

00:17:26It's Agora.

00:17:27Hills.

00:17:28Oh my god, from high school.

00:17:29Yes!

00:17:30What's up?

00:17:30You mean us now.

00:17:31Agora Hills.

00:17:33Oh, snap.

00:17:34Yeah.

00:17:35Congratulations.

00:17:36Yeah, thank you.

00:17:37Dan, you look so, like, so much less fat than you did in high school.

00:17:43Seriously, I was just thinking that.

00:17:44Well, I got my nose done.

00:17:47And lip filler.

00:17:48Oh, word, yeah.

00:17:49And my ass.

00:17:50Oh, cool, yeah.

00:17:51That looks super good.

00:17:53Sick, right?

00:17:54Look at my wife's ass, dude.

00:17:56Yeah.

00:17:56No, it looks, for sure, I'm looking at it.

00:17:58Yeah, cheers, it looks great.

00:18:00Will you take me to homecoming now?

00:18:08Take me to homecoming now.

00:18:13Is she still pissed about it?

00:18:15Agora Hills, damn, totally forgot I was about to ask her to homecoming sophomore year until

00:18:22I saw Molly crank that soldier boy at Quinoa's Quinceanera.

00:18:26Couldn't help but look at her like, damn.

00:18:30Like, what else can she crack?

00:18:32But yeah, it seems like their whole squad is really glowed up.

00:18:34Yo, Wade.

00:18:35What up, dude?

00:18:37JP.

00:18:38What's up, dude?

00:18:38My guy.

00:18:39How you been, man?

00:18:40Good, dude.

00:18:41Good.

00:18:41Dude, you want an edible?

00:18:43Yeah.

00:18:44Yes, let me have one of those.

00:18:46For sure.

00:18:46Oh, wow, look at that thing.

00:18:49Oh, strong.

00:18:50Strong.

00:18:50Yeah, dude, it's dank.

00:18:52Tastes like gasoline.

00:18:54Cool.

00:18:54Thanks, man.

00:18:55For sure, dude.

00:18:55Yeah.

00:18:56Yeah, yeah.

00:18:58You gonna eat it, or?

00:19:00Oh, uh, yeah, yeah.

00:19:02Probably, yeah, in an hour I will, probably.

00:19:04Because I don't want to be faded right now.

00:19:06But, like, I'm down to be faded in an hour, probably.

00:19:08Oh, well, dude, it takes, like, an hour to kick in.

00:19:10So if you eat it now, it's perfect.

00:19:12Oh, what did I say?

00:19:12I said an hour?

00:19:13Yeah.

00:19:13Oh, I meant two hours.

00:19:15So I'll probably eat it in an hour.

00:19:17And sorry I'm all jumbled up, daylight savings, you know?

00:19:20It was a stupid question.

00:19:21That plan's insane.

00:19:23So where is Molly?

00:19:25Did you guys break up?

00:19:26Oh, no, no.

00:19:27She's just back at the house.

00:19:29Probably pretty pissed, actually,

00:19:30since we just, like, came here and didn't, like,

00:19:32give him the heads up or anything.

00:19:34That's pretty lame.

00:19:35Wait, does Molly have any passions?

00:19:38Uh, not particularly, no.

00:19:42Perfect.

00:19:43I'm going to hit her up.

00:19:45Or we should go on a double date to that hot new spot.

00:19:47Oh, that hot new spot is so fire.

00:19:49So fire.

00:19:50So fire.

00:19:51So fire.

00:19:52You've been?

00:19:53Matthew, of course he's been.

00:19:55It's Zan, CB Valley top dog.

00:19:57He could have invited anyone to homecoming,

00:19:59and he brought Molly.

00:20:07So these are my girlfriends, Topanga, Ventura.

00:20:10I love them both.

00:20:11And that's my homie, Sean.

00:20:13What up?

00:20:14Oh, damn.

00:20:16Dude, you're Sean White.

00:20:18Yeah, man.

00:20:19What are you even doing here?

00:20:22What am I doing here?

00:20:23I can't just be here?

00:20:25You can, but, like, it's just crazy seeing you and see me.

00:20:30Why is it crazy that I'm just here

00:20:33sipping Shirley teas, my drink of choice,

00:20:36just hanging with my buds?

00:20:38What's crazy about that?

00:20:39No, no, it's totally cool that you're, like,

00:20:41sipping the Shirley teas and whatever.

00:20:43I think he just more so means it's super random

00:20:45that you're here.

00:20:46I don't think it's random.

00:20:49You're random.

00:20:51OK, anyway, circling back.

00:20:52Hey, Braco, you said that, uh, so both of these girls

00:20:56are your girlfriends?

00:20:58Yeah.

00:20:59And you guys are all, like, totally cool with that?

00:21:02Yeah.

00:21:04I think it'd be pretty weird if he was dating both of us

00:21:06and we just didn't know.

00:21:07Yeah, like, morally, that'd be, like, really messed up.

00:21:10It's like that movie, Savages, except I'm

00:21:12the Blake Lackley character.

00:21:14Have you seen the movie, Savages?

00:21:15Yeah.

00:21:16Yeah, it's like that.

00:21:18Yo, just out of curiosity, uh, like,

00:21:22what are you benching these days?

00:21:23I'm mostly into calisthenics now, bro.

00:21:25But, uh, last I checked, probably, like, 350.

00:21:30350.

00:21:32That's not bad.

00:21:33How much do you bench, man?

00:21:35Been a hot man, uh, for sure.

00:21:36But, um, I'd say probably 500.

00:21:42Nice.

00:21:43Yeah.

00:21:44You ever get into Muay Thai?

00:21:45Muay Thai?

00:21:46No, it's way too spicy for me.

00:21:48I do like sushi, though.

00:21:51That reminds me, bro, your truck is, uh, pretty tricked.

00:21:54Was that pricey?

00:21:55No idea.

00:21:56Gore got it for me.

00:21:57I mean, it came with, you know, the Lyft and, like,

00:21:59the bright baby blue.

00:22:00But, uh, I added the subs.

00:22:04But it's probably, like, a gas guzzler and a half, though,

00:22:07right?

00:22:08No, it's actually a hybrid, so it's pretty chill.

00:22:11No way.

00:22:12Indica or Sativa Dominant?

00:22:14No, like, it only takes half gas.

00:22:18You're telling me your truck runs on mid-kush?

00:22:23You guys are funny.

00:22:24Who's this little guy?

00:22:25Hey, bud.

00:22:26I like your shirt.

00:22:31OK, I'll just go f*** myself, then.

00:22:32F***.

00:22:33Oh, dang.

00:22:35What did he say?

00:22:36What's he say?

00:22:37You didn't have to do him like that.

00:22:38No, what'd he say?

00:22:38That was so savage.

00:22:40What's up with your dog, fool?

00:22:41Trying to start some shit, or what?

00:22:42I don't think he's the one starting some shit.

00:22:46But he might be the one finishing some shit.

00:22:48Oh, yeah?

00:22:49You don't want this, bro.

00:22:50Trust me.

00:22:51I should have beat the f*** out of your dog, bro.

00:22:52He will tear you apart, bud.

00:22:54I'll take his leash around, swing him, helicopter,

00:22:57throw him.

00:22:58Hey, hey, hey, he ain't worth it.

00:23:00You want to go for a walk?

00:23:01Dude, can't say WLK.

00:23:04Now I have to take him.

00:23:07Just took him.

00:23:08Matter of fact, hey, why don't you give him a treat?

00:23:10Ah, damn it.

00:23:11Yo, Bryce, let's dip, dude.

00:23:13Sorry about that, bro.

00:23:13No, no, for sure.

00:23:14All good.

00:23:14No worries, dude.

00:23:15I'll see you guys at the reunion.

00:23:18Yeah, I guess you will.

00:23:26About time.

00:23:27Wait, where's the kickback stuff?

00:23:29We forgot it.

00:23:31How?

00:23:31You were gone for like two hours.

00:23:33Well, we forgot it.

00:23:35OK, Lexi?

00:23:37Wait, what the hell is going on?

00:23:39Yo, the comeback squad.

00:23:43Hello, what happened?

00:23:44You want to know what happened?

00:23:45We're not that sick is what happened.

00:23:47What?

00:23:48Yes, we are.

00:23:49I was just telling them we're about to go to the reunion.

00:23:50We're going to go to the reunion.

00:23:51We're going to stun on fools.

00:23:52We're going to flex on fools and look dope.

00:23:53Not going to happen like that.

00:23:54We shouldn't even go.

00:23:56OK, we have to go.

00:23:57I am not missing it.

00:23:59The baseball bros are sicker than us now.

00:24:02What, like Jaffe U.S. in them?

00:24:04Bro, that's a physical impossibility.

00:24:06The baseball dudes are way less sick than us in high school.

00:24:09Yeah, well, not anymore, Johnny.

00:24:12Before our run-in with Jaffe U.S. squad,

00:24:14we were super stoked for the reunion.

00:24:17And also just, like, overall very content with our lives.

00:24:21But now I realize we're not even close to living the kind

00:24:24of lives that look sick online.

00:24:26Like, I didn't even know about the hot new spot.

00:24:29Look, guys, I know we're on some seriously insecure vibes

00:24:32about some things that are, quite frankly,

00:24:34completely out of our control.

00:24:36All right?

00:24:37I think the only thing we can do right now, realistically,

00:24:42is spend every waking moment between now

00:24:45and the reunion making sure we look as sick as possible.

00:24:49Hell yeah!

00:24:50Yes!

00:24:50Hell yeah!

00:24:51Yes!

00:24:56Oh!

00:24:57Oh!

00:24:58Oh!

00:24:59Oh, God.

00:25:00Zander?

00:25:01Oh.

00:25:02Oh, yeah?

00:25:04Zander.

00:25:04I said I'll take care of it tomorrow.

00:25:07It is tomorrow.

00:25:08Oh, yeah.

00:25:09Zander.

00:25:09OK, OK, OK, OK.

00:25:10This sucks.

00:25:11Come on.

00:25:12At the end of last season, Wade said

00:25:14he needed somewhere to stay for a couple weeks.

00:25:17And we totally believed him on that timeline.

00:25:19But it's been, like, a couple of years now,

00:25:22and he seems to just be getting more and more comfortable.

00:25:26Oh, wow.

00:25:27Yo.

00:25:29Yo, Zond.

00:25:30Are you trying to get in on the coal punch grind, man?

00:25:33Yo, dude, I'm just trying to sleep, low key.

00:25:37You guys still sleeping in super late?

00:25:39I mean, it's like 5, dude.

00:25:43Yo, but Molly and I were talking, and, um.

00:25:45This is the hardest part.

00:25:46Right here, before you go numb.

00:25:47Oh.

00:25:48Right, yeah.

00:25:50But I was wondering if you've, like, I don't know,

00:25:53been looking for places, or taking any steps,

00:25:55like, in that direction, or.

00:25:57Oh, fuck it, I got a bale.

00:25:58Can you hand me the towel right there?

00:26:00Yeah, but after I hand you the towel, could we?

00:26:02Zander, the towel, man.

00:26:02My dick's going in, man.

00:26:03I can feel it going in.

00:26:04Look, at heart, I'm an artist.

00:26:06Everyone knows that.

00:26:08But I don't know, man.

00:26:09Lately, I've just been focusing on optimizing my lifestyle,

00:26:12which all starts with a morning routine.

00:26:15Let me educate you.

00:26:17Wake up at 4.20 AM, and just get ready to penetrate the day.

00:26:21Measure out exactly 18 grams of coffee beans.

00:26:24Brew them.

00:26:25Film myself getting a little cold plunge in.

00:26:27List out my yearly goals, followed

00:26:29by a 45-minute meditation in the middle of the living room.

00:26:32After that, I'll knock out some work if I have time.

00:26:35And then the second half of my day

00:26:37mostly consists of doing yoga and listening to podcasts

00:26:40where white guys with rich dads give life advice.

00:26:42Drinking your own piss is, hands down,

00:26:44the best way to retain your own nutrients.

00:26:47I haven't eaten all week.

00:26:49I'm just recycling.

00:26:50I will easily live to be about 200.

00:26:52Yeah, dude, like, I'm glad you're

00:26:54on your routine and all that.

00:26:55But I just feel like it's not actually making you any money,

00:26:58you know, or getting you any closer to actually

00:27:00moving out of the house.

00:27:02Listen, Zan, I hear you.

00:27:03But I just can't help but feel what you're

00:27:05saying to me right now is a projection

00:27:07of your own insecurities because you no longer

00:27:09have the wettest truck in Simi.

00:27:11Damn, I was pretty sure that wasn't

00:27:14at all my intention for starting this conversation.

00:27:16But after Wade brought it up, I was like,

00:27:19maybe I do have an ulterior motive.

00:27:21Usually when I'm feeling insecure,

00:27:23I can remind myself, like, at least I have

00:27:25a bigger truck than that fool.

00:27:27But I don't right now.

00:27:29It has me feeling like I might have

00:27:30to get unnaturally jacked in order

00:27:32to be sicker than Jathi at the reunion,

00:27:34especially since Wade isn't even going to be there.

00:27:37Dude, I'm going to be there.

00:27:38You're not even in the class of 2010, though.

00:27:40I'll just be someone's plus one.

00:27:41Pretty sure you can't be someone's plus one

00:27:43unless it's a significant other.

00:27:45Hmm.

00:27:46Well, how would they even prove you're someone's sick?

00:27:48I think you have to suck face at the door when prompted.

00:27:51What?

00:27:52Fine, I'll just go with Lexi, then.

00:27:54That'd be sick.

00:27:55Lexi and I are, like, low-key star-crossed lovers.

00:27:59Our timing has just never really been right.

00:28:01I really thought I was going to go down in Cabo

00:28:03at Zan's boster party, but Lexi?

00:28:07I don't know, people from our past just keep cock-blocking us

00:28:09at, like, the least opportune moments.

00:28:11I've been responding to all of her stories

00:28:12with a fire emoji, though, so...

00:28:14I think it's only a matter of time.

00:28:15Dude, it is only a matter of time, and I agree.

00:28:19You should start hooking up with Lexi

00:28:20for the sole purpose of securing a reunion invite.

00:28:23Well, no, I... Dude, that's what's up.

00:28:26And by the time she realizes your whole evil plan,

00:28:28you'll already have attended the reunion,

00:28:30so it won't even matter, dude.

00:28:31Yeah, dude, but I actually kind of like her.

00:28:33Anyways, back to me.

00:28:34All this talk about the reunion has given me clarity.

00:28:37I know what I need to do to secure my sickness,

00:28:41and that's get the biggest truck in all of Simi.

00:28:44Holy shit.

00:28:45That's genius! Yeah.

00:28:47And I'm going to be the most jacked.

00:28:49Dude, I can train you.

00:28:50You should hop on my morning routine grind.

00:28:52Oh, dude, that'd be so helpful.

00:28:54Oh, wait, shoot.

00:28:56What? You said I had to move out.

00:28:58Bummer.

00:29:00Wait, hey, forget that.

00:29:02You're staying. You mean it?

00:29:04Yeah, dude. Oh, sick!

00:29:06Yes!

00:29:07It's gonna be so sick.

00:29:08Dude, it's gonna be awesome.

00:29:17Obviously, I had dreams to come to the reunion as a pro skater.

00:29:20I mean, I was raw as fuck in high school.

00:29:23I'm just too injury-prone.

00:29:26But that's not really something I talk about.

00:29:28I like to keep that at the deepest parts of my heart.

00:29:31Yo, what up, Mr. Meyer? What's up, G?

00:29:33But, yeah, I've been a lit teacher at Simi High for the past year.

00:29:36And recently, you know, my ego's just been in full-blown spiral mode.

00:29:39So, I think it's time for that promotion.

00:29:41Knock, knock.

00:29:43Oh, you're just gonna walk right in, huh?

00:29:44Yeah, what up, Ms. B?

00:29:46Good morning, Bryce.

00:29:47What's up?

00:29:50Got you an apple.

00:29:51Oh, thank you.

00:29:53Seems like this one has a hole in it.

00:29:57Yeah, I smoked out of it earlier, so...

00:30:03So, what'd you want to talk about, Bryce?

00:30:05You know, it's been over a year.

00:30:07I've been killing it.

00:30:08Yeah, I was thinking about, like, a promotion, you know?

00:30:11Yeah...

00:30:14That's not typically how we do promotions.

00:30:17But what'd you have in mind?

00:30:19What's, like, the position under your...

00:30:20Like, directly under your position?

00:30:23That would be vice principal.

00:30:25I'll take it.

00:30:26You want to be vice principal?

00:30:27Yeah.

00:30:29Well, unfortunately, that position has been filled.

00:30:33By who?

00:30:33Mrs. Stringbaum.

00:30:36Janet?

00:30:37Yeah, is that a problem?

00:30:38Backstabbing bitch.

00:30:40Excuse me?

00:30:41Uh, I said that's tight. That's sick.

00:30:43Really?

00:30:44Yeah.

00:30:44Because it sounded like you said,

00:30:45that backstabbing bitch.

00:30:47Nah, I didn't say that, actually.

00:30:48Uh, you're tripping.

00:30:49So, I'm gonna take my pipe back,

00:30:53and I'll see ya.

00:30:55Mrs. Stringbaum?

00:30:56Dude, she definitely only got the job

00:30:58because she has the most teachery-sounding name.

00:31:00I thought we were homies.

00:31:02But as a wise and definitely super unproblematic

00:31:05singer-songwriter Chris Brown once said,

00:31:07these hoes ain't loyal.

00:31:09No.

00:31:11These hoes ain't loyal.

00:31:13And that was straight up written about Janet Stringbaum.

00:31:15Hey.

00:31:16Watch your back, Stringbaum.

00:31:20I'm not the kind of guy that just folds under pressure

00:31:22and goes out without a fight.

00:31:23So, after hearing about Janet

00:31:25completely butt-ramming my mouth,

00:31:26I had to devise an incredibly sick plan.

00:31:30What's up, Bryce?

00:31:31Yeah.

00:31:32Got your note.

00:31:33What's going on, dude?

00:31:34Are you struggling with, like, feelings of inadequacy

00:31:36leading up to the reunion, or what's up, bro?

00:31:38What?

00:31:39No, okay, long story short,

00:31:41that position, vice principal position,

00:31:44Mrs. Stringbaum snagged it.

00:31:46Out from under my nose, bro.

00:31:47And did she know that you wanted it, like, super badly?

00:31:50Like, you were working hard towards it?

00:31:51Not really, no.

00:31:53But, I mean, you have been working hard towards it.

00:31:55No, not at all.

00:31:56But she knew, like, deep down you really wanted it,

00:31:58you just hadn't expressed that to her yet?

00:32:00No, I just found out about it today, the positions.

00:32:02Oh, damn, bro, wow.

00:32:04Okay.

00:32:04Yeah, okay, that makes it, like,

00:32:05harder to empathize with you over this.

00:32:07Look, dude, we have to organize a boycott, okay?

00:32:11We have to tell the entire school,

00:32:12especially Mrs. Stringbaum,

00:32:13that if she doesn't step down from this VP position,

00:32:16none of us are coming to class next year.

00:32:21I mean, we're seniors, so, like,

00:32:23we're gonna graduate and go to college and shit.

00:32:25We're not coming back next year.

00:32:27Are you joking?

00:32:29What do you mean?

00:32:30No, I'm going to Simi State,

00:32:31he's going to U of Simi.

00:32:32But we're gonna see each other on the weekends, you know,

00:32:34try to make it work long distance.

00:32:35I'm not worried at all.

00:32:36Don't you remember we asked you for those letters

00:32:38of recommendation, like, months ago?

00:32:40Yeah, and I said,

00:32:41"[Bleep], college, you don't need it,"

00:32:43and we all laughed.

00:32:44Yeah.

00:32:44Yeah, we thought you were kidding.

00:32:46Yeah.

00:32:46Did you not write those letters?

00:32:48Those were important.

00:32:49So you guys are betraying me?

00:32:50I thought we were boys.

00:32:52We are boys, dude, but, like, I mean,

00:32:55well, we're not gonna, like, sabotage our futures

00:32:57just to kick with you at high school.

00:32:58Wow.

00:33:00After everything I've taught you,

00:33:01this is how you repay me?

00:33:03Well, I guess it's gonna be pretty hard to get into college

00:33:04when you both are failing this class.

00:33:07Yeah, but we're not failing this class.

00:33:08We both have A's.

00:33:10Hmm.

00:33:13Weird, it doesn't look like that on my end.

00:33:16Let's take a look at this.

00:33:19Dude, that's illegal.

00:33:21Listen to me.

00:33:22I will not hesitate to do everything in my power

00:33:24to make sure neither of you reach your full potential.

00:33:27To make myself feel better.

00:33:29All right?

00:33:30You got that?

00:33:33Get the heck out of here.

00:33:34Out of my sight.

00:33:36What is that?

00:33:38Bye.

00:33:39What is that noise?

00:33:53Yo, Tuck.

00:33:55You gotta flip the hats around so the logo's facing out.

00:33:58Otherwise, how are people gonna know

00:34:00what's on the hat, you know?

00:34:01Oh, shit.

00:34:03Good call.

00:34:07So are you gonna do that right now?

00:34:09Can I be honest with you, Johnny?

00:34:10I kind of feel like you're micromanaging me right now.

00:34:12I am your manager.

00:34:13Tucker, out.

00:34:14Go hide.

00:34:15Seriously, get out of here.

00:34:15Yo, Dunkels.

00:34:16I don't have time for that.

00:34:17Got a few quest ideas about this, uh, upcoming...

00:34:19I don't have time for that, dude.

00:34:20I have to make it look like I'm working really hard.

00:34:22Tess is about to be here.

00:34:23Okay, but I was working really hard.

00:34:25Okay, well, not everything's about you.

00:34:26Oh, so it's for you.

00:34:29Danny.

00:34:30Hey.

00:34:30Everything was going according to plan, dude.

00:34:32Everything.

00:34:33I went on my 45-minute date with Danny.

00:34:35She drops me off.

00:34:36I run into DunkSurf,

00:34:38trying to get ready for my date with Tessa.

00:34:40And then Danny walks in two minutes

00:34:42before Tessa's supposed to show up.

00:34:43At this point, I just gotta hope Tessa

00:34:45gets into a car crash or something.

00:34:47Nothing fatal.

00:34:49But definitely something that'll slow her down.

00:34:51You, uh, you left your Savages DVD in the car.

00:34:53So...

00:34:54You should just hang on to it.

00:34:55You should check it out.

00:34:56It's actually pretty good.

00:34:57What's up, Johnny?

00:34:58Of course you're here not doing shit.

00:34:59I was working pretty hard.

00:35:02Reworking?

00:35:03Then why are all those hats backwards?

00:35:05I leave for one hour and everything goes so south.

00:35:08Pathetic.

00:35:09Look, I'm swamped right now.

00:35:11I would love to hang out, but I really can't.

00:35:13I have to get back to work.

00:35:14Okay.

00:35:17Hey, Danny.

00:35:19Tessa?

00:35:20What are you doing here?

00:35:22Um, I just needed to swing by and pick up...

00:35:26Pick up some wax.

00:35:28Huh.

00:35:29Um, what about you?

00:35:30What are you doing here?

00:35:31Uh, I was just here because I was, uh...

00:35:32I was picking up some grip tape.

00:35:36Oh, word?

00:35:37You needed new grip tape?

00:35:40I was out.

00:35:43Well, we have grip tape and we have wax.

00:35:45So...

00:35:47Johnny, can you help them instead of...

00:35:49Yeah.

00:35:49Like, having both babies on either side of me

00:35:52in another extremely close call

00:35:54is really getting me to thinking

00:35:56that this is just not a sustainable situation.

00:35:58Like, it's not fair to them,

00:35:59but mostly, it's not fair to me.

00:36:01I think it's about time I keep it real.

00:36:04Not now.

00:36:06But soon.

00:36:0720 bucks for wax?

00:36:08Would you like to leave a tip?

00:36:1030, 35, or 40%.

00:36:12Couldn't risk either of them getting suspicious,

00:36:14so I actually just charged them both double.

00:36:18So, can, um...

00:36:19Can you approve these logos that Wade sent over for the drop?

00:36:22Dude, I do not have the bandwidth for that right now.

00:36:24Did you not see what just transpired?

00:36:27I've been pretty patient about doing all the work at the shop

00:36:29while Duncan fabricates an elaborate lie

00:36:31that I'm a bad employee to use as an alibi

00:36:33to cheat on both of his girlfriends.

00:36:35But enough is enough.

00:36:37Okay, Dunk.

00:36:39I'm just gonna vocalize some words real quick.

00:36:42This is unsustainable, bro.

00:36:44Danny and Tess are the homies, you know?

00:36:46It's not fair to them.

00:36:48It's not fair to the shop.

00:36:50And most importantly, bruv,

00:36:53it's not fair to you.

00:36:55Wow.

00:36:56Thank you, dude.

00:36:57I care about you.

00:36:58Just never thought of it like that.

00:37:00Um, hey, could you do me a favor real quick?

00:37:03Um, could you go f*** yourself?

00:37:06You have the nerve.

00:37:08No, the gall

00:37:10to come in here and gaslight me.

00:37:12Bro, I'm spitting facts.

00:37:14Dude, you're spitting fables.

00:37:15Do you know how much pressure I'm under right now?

00:37:18That's what I'm saying, though.

00:37:19Okay, well, you know what I'm saying?

00:37:21You, Johnny Johnny Mendez,

00:37:24are fired.

00:37:25♪♪

00:37:31♪♪

00:37:37♪♪

00:37:40Ah, Agora.

00:37:42Hey.

00:37:42Hi.

00:37:43What's up?

00:37:45Oh.

00:37:46Me and Agora were super close

00:37:48after we dissected a frog

00:37:49in Mr. Dalton's physiology class freshman year.

00:37:52But then Zan asked me to homecoming,

00:37:54and we just, like, kind of stopped talking.

00:37:56But then she texted me the other day

00:37:58that she ran into Zan,

00:37:59and she has a once-in-a-lifetime business opportunity.

00:38:02Lexi wanted to check it out, too.

00:38:04Not exactly sure why Wade is here, though.

00:38:06You look so...

00:38:09different.

00:38:11Thank you so much.

00:38:12Thank you.

00:38:13Yeah.

00:38:14You look so, like, the same.

00:38:16How are you?

00:38:17Oh, that's hot.

00:38:18He's great, yeah.

00:38:19He's getting so old.

00:38:20They grow up so fast.

00:38:22I have no idea.

00:38:24He just, uh, he moved out of the house,

00:38:25so it's just me and Zan there now.

00:38:27And Wade, I guess.

00:38:29Yeah, I'm just kind of between projects right now,

00:38:31so, you know, focusing on optimizing my daily routine

00:38:34and stuff like that.

00:38:35That's fun.

00:38:35So, what is this business opportunity?

00:38:38Because, you know, I've been really looking for my truck.

00:38:42Metaphorically.

00:38:43I feel that everybody deserves their truck.

00:38:48Metaphorically.

00:38:50Molly, how would you feel about getting into real estate?

00:38:56Um, yes, please.

00:38:58Yeah?

00:38:58Yeah.

00:38:59Okay, let's get right into it.

00:39:01So, do you own a real estate company or something?

00:39:03Something like that.

00:39:05What do you mean, something like that?

00:39:06Lexi, chill.

00:39:07They're doing this for us.

00:39:08I'll ask two questions, Molly.

00:39:10Basically, you pay a one-time membership fee

00:39:13every month of $5,000 directly to me,

00:39:16and then you can get into our open house parties,

00:39:18events, you can be on our reality show.

00:39:20So, is it a one-time fee or is it once every month?

00:39:23Exactly.

00:39:25Well, okay, you guys, the best part is that...

00:39:27Lexi.

00:39:29Hey.

00:39:30So, you going to the reunion or what's up?

00:39:32Yeah.

00:39:33That's sick, because I'm going to be there, too, so...

00:39:34I mean, I'm not, like, technically invited yet or whatever,

00:39:37but, like, there's got to be some way that I can go, right?

00:39:40Yeah.

00:39:41Sorry, Agora, what were you saying?

00:39:43That's okay.

00:39:44So, basically, like, the best part is,

00:39:46you recruit people,

00:39:49and then you make commission

00:39:51off of everyone that they bring in.

00:39:54Like a funnel.

00:39:56Exactly.

00:39:56Like a funnel.

00:39:57Exactly.

00:39:57What is the commission on, though?

00:39:59Like, houses, mansions.

00:40:01Lately, we've been really into gentrification.

00:40:04Ooh.

00:40:05Brilliant.

00:40:06And I don't really like to say numbers,

00:40:07but I have been making between $240,000 and $250,000 a year.

00:40:13So, $245,000 per year?

00:40:15I'm not really comfortable sharing numbers.

00:40:19So, what do you think?

00:40:22Are you in?

00:40:23Oh.

00:40:25We're in.

00:40:27Shake.

00:40:37Hector!

00:40:38F***ing knock, bro, jeez!

00:40:40My bad, dawg.

00:40:42Were you doing something sketchy again?

00:40:43Yes.

00:40:44I've been looking for you, dawg.

00:40:46You went to the juice bar, like, five hours ago.

00:40:47Yeah, well, I've been looking for something, Hector.

00:40:52Like what, dawg?

00:40:53The biggest truck in all of Simi.

00:40:55Oh, shit, dawg!

00:40:57Yeah.

00:40:58And did you find it, or qué?

00:41:00You know, I found some options.

00:41:01I found some good stuff on, um, Google Images.

00:41:04Google Images?

00:41:05Just need to make sure I can afford it.

00:41:06How we doing on business?

00:41:09Why, you look like you're about to tell me something

00:41:12I don't want to hear.

00:41:13Tell me something good, man.

00:41:14Look, dawg, I hate to be the wolf of bad news, bro, but...

00:41:16Hold on.

00:41:17The what?

00:41:17The wolf of bad news?

00:41:20You know, like, like the bear of bad news,

00:41:22but a wolf instead, because it's worse?

00:41:25Bro.

00:41:26No, it's the bear-er of bad news.

00:41:29It's not, it's not a bear of...

00:41:31Yeah, I don't think so, bro.

00:41:33But going back to the sales, sales are,

00:41:35they're pretty down right now, dawg.

00:41:36What seems to be the ish?

00:41:38Honestly?

00:41:41I think the new truck nuts are a little too realistic, bro.

00:41:48We've been Simi Valley's number one truck nut installer

00:41:51for almost three years now.

00:41:53I thought it was crazy when we installed 300 sacks.

00:41:55So to be sitting here telling you,

00:41:57we've officially installed over 1,500 sacks

00:42:00is just nuts, pun intended.

00:42:04But lately, it's just kind of seeming like our nut tech

00:42:06has gotten a little too good.

00:42:13Yeah, I don't see what the problem is.

00:42:14Those look just like my nuts.

00:42:20Yeah, dawg, I think that is the problem, you know?

00:42:23I don't think anybody wants to look

00:42:24at a realistic pair of nuts.

00:42:25Is it the ball hairs?

00:42:26I think it's the hairs, dawg, the flimsiness of it,

00:42:30the length.

00:42:31This one hangs a little lower than the right.

00:42:32Yeah, that's me.

00:42:33Remember, they made the cast with my nuts.

00:42:36It was a super awkward day in here, remember?

00:42:38They put my nuts in the molding.

00:42:40I remember, I remember.

00:42:41So I mean, bro, centimeter for centimeter,

00:42:42that is my nut sacking alone.

00:42:44I hear you, dawg.

00:42:45I hear you.

00:42:46Hector, keep your 100 with me.

00:42:49Does this mean I can't afford the biggest

00:42:51truck in all of Simi?

00:42:54Yeah, no, dawg.

00:43:00Seems like I'm pretty much facing every type

00:43:03of adversity known to man.

00:43:04But the thought of showing up to the reunion

00:43:06without the sickest truck has just been haunting my dreams.

00:43:10I just cannot allow that to happen.

00:43:12I will have the best truck at the Simi High 10-year reunion,

00:43:17or my name isn't Xander Hussein Sanders.

00:43:23The reunion is only two weeks away.

00:43:26So I thought the best way to figure out a game plan

00:43:29would be to invite the squad over for a kickback.

00:43:31What's up, boy?

00:43:33But really, it's just a brainstorm session disguise.

00:43:35What's up, bro?

00:43:37You got a real Daenerys Targaryen

00:43:39over here on the grill.

00:43:40Shut up, Bryce.

00:43:41Everyone likes a little char, dude.

00:43:42Zan, you're looking swole, bro.

00:43:44Oh, thanks, dude.

00:43:45Swollen.

00:43:46About time someone said something.

00:43:47All right, enough of that, guys.

00:43:49We got two weeks till the reunion.

00:43:51So I thought it'd be a good time to do a quick squad

00:43:53sickness update.

00:43:55Bryce, you secure that promotion?

00:43:56No, I actually got mad betrayed by everyone over there.

00:43:59So I'm just going to focus on being the most yatted.

00:44:01Oh, word.

00:44:02So you can focus all your efforts

00:44:03on helping me find the biggest choke and see me?

00:44:05Precisely, yeah.

00:44:06I mean, I'm already yatted, so.

00:44:08I don't know, dude.

00:44:09Finneas Bustamante is looking pretty yatted these days.

00:44:11Yo, he is looking yatted, damn, and jacked.

00:44:15Shut up, dude.

00:44:16You're not even coming, bro.

00:44:17I am coming.

00:44:17Oh, yeah?

00:44:18You're coming?

00:44:19Yeah, I'm going to come.

00:44:20You're coming?

00:44:21With Lexi.

00:44:22I'm going to rizz her up when she gets here, probably.

00:44:23That's why I'm wearing so much cologne.

00:44:24I thought I smelled ass.

00:44:25Dude, everyone is so distracted.

00:44:28I'm holding it together, like, super well.

00:44:31But unbeknownst to the squad, I'm pissed off.

00:44:34Guys, shut up and focus.

00:44:36Come on.

00:44:37Yeah, shut up.

00:44:38Guys, if we're going to be pulling up in Zahn's truck,

00:44:41we have to make sure he wins truck of the year.

00:44:42Thank you.

00:44:43Luckily, I'm living with him, and for the foreseeable future.

00:44:46So I can be super helpful.

00:44:47But, like, we're going to need all hands on deck.

00:44:49Yay.

00:44:50Dunk, you can help, right?

00:44:52Dunk it.

00:44:53Dude, I have a lot going on right now, OK?

00:44:55Jesus.

00:44:56I have a drop coming up.

00:44:58Oh, yeah?

00:44:59You got a big drop coming up?

00:45:01And I'm still trying to figure out that whole situation

00:45:04over there, so.

00:45:05Oh, yeah.

00:45:06What's your plan there, dude?

00:45:07Hey, what's the plan with that, Dunk?

00:45:09I've made my decision.

00:45:10I'm going to let you guys know tomorrow, 5 PM, PST.

00:45:13Already made hats.

00:45:15You're going to do it like you're committing to a college?

00:45:18That's exactly what I'm going to do, Wade.

00:45:23After running into Danny at Dunk Surf,

00:45:25I feel like I should probably make

00:45:26sure she wouldn't feel weird about me showing

00:45:28up to the reunion with Duncan.

00:45:29And I feel like this conversation has the potential

00:45:31to be very awkward.

00:45:32So I thought it'd be best to quickly rip one

00:45:35to the dome to calm my nerves.

00:45:36Like what?

00:45:37Oh, sick.

00:45:46So, Danny, how's it going?

00:45:51I mean, I'm a little rattled by the way

00:45:52you just housed that El Brazo Especial.

00:45:54But otherwise, I'm pretty good.

00:45:55How are things with you and Duncan?

00:46:00What?

00:46:01Are things, like, awkward between you guys?

00:46:04Like, do you guys talk?

00:46:07Tessa, that's like a super frickin' random question.

00:46:13I love you.

00:46:16I love you.

00:46:18Like, maybe like one or two times in total,

00:46:21but not really, no.

00:46:23What about you?

00:46:26I love you.

00:46:28I love you.

00:46:30Um, Danny, have you considered purchasing a home?

00:46:36I recently got into real estate.

00:46:37Oh, cool.

00:46:38Shot you over a few links.

00:46:39Yeah, no, I saw.

00:46:39You see the links?

00:46:40I saw the links.

00:46:41So many.

00:46:42I love that.

00:46:42Like 20 or 30 links.

00:46:44Is it just me, or did Molly become a real estate

00:46:47agent like one week ago?

00:46:49Let's buy something soon, yeah?

00:46:50I think I hear the door.

00:46:52Is it the door?

00:46:53Get over here.

00:46:55What's up, family?

00:46:56Sun salutations.

00:46:58I'm so hung over for brunch.

00:46:59Good to see you.

00:47:00Yo, I thought that was your boy, dog.

00:47:01You just going to let him swoop your girl like that?

00:47:04She wants to play the old bring his former college roommate

00:47:08to the kickback to make him jealous strategy.

00:47:10Classic.

00:47:11Look, I went to college with Aldis.

00:47:13I lived with him.

00:47:14He threw my art show with me.

00:47:16I know him very well.

00:47:17Like, they're so not right for each other,

00:47:19it's like I don't even care.

00:47:20Like, they would never end up together.

00:47:211A!

00:47:23You going to beat his ass?

00:47:25Yeah.

00:47:26Yo, blindside him, fool.

00:47:28Straight knock him right now.

00:47:30I will right now.

00:47:31Knock him, dude.

00:47:34What's happening?

00:47:35Oh, my god.

00:47:36Hey!

00:47:37Oh!

00:47:38Oh!

00:47:39Oh, my heart just shouldn't beat, dude.

00:47:42What's up?

00:47:43Oh, nothing, man.

00:47:44It's so sick that you're here, man.

00:47:45Yeah, how are you?

00:47:46It's great to see you, dude.

00:47:47I'm good, man.

00:47:47How are you?

00:47:48Yeah.

00:47:49You're good?

00:47:49Yeah, dude.

00:47:50OK.

00:47:51Awesome.

00:47:52You just seem kind of stressed.

00:47:54You here with Lexi?

00:47:55Yeah, dude.

00:47:55It's my little ginger tea, dude.

00:47:57What?

00:47:58Crazy she brought you, man.

00:48:00Super chill, though.

00:48:01Well, we've been hanging out a lot lately.

00:48:02You guys have been hanging out?

00:48:03Yeah, dude.

00:48:04We spent a lot of time.

00:48:05Went to the desert last weekend.

00:48:06Realigned her throat chakra.

00:48:08That's so good to hear.

00:48:10Yeah.

00:48:10I love chakras.

00:48:11Yeah, dude.

00:48:12Nice.

00:48:13Are you sure everything's OK?

00:48:15Yo, speaking of knocking pools, where's your boy at, son?

00:48:19Who?

00:48:20Your son, Hawk?

00:48:22Is he coming?

00:48:24Yeah, he'll be here in a little.

00:48:27He better not show up.

00:48:29I mean, he's going to show up, so.

00:48:33He better not.

00:48:34In case you didn't know, I'm not a fan of Xander's son.

00:48:38Never been, never will be.

00:48:40Yo, why is he looking at me like that?

00:48:41What's up, little bud?

00:48:42You got a staring problem, pal?

00:48:45Like what, dude?

00:48:45He's just looking at you.

00:48:46He's a baby.

00:48:47Look at his face.

00:48:48Dumb little face.

00:48:50Stop.

00:48:51Yo, Xan, get your boy, dog.

00:48:53Hi.

00:48:54What's little, dude?

00:48:55What's going on?

00:48:56Since he was only one, it's just been nonstop beef.

00:48:59But at the end of season two, I thought I'd be the bigger man

00:49:01and finally squash it.

00:49:02But a couple years later, when he was all grown up,

00:49:05that fool came up to me at Xander's wedding still pissed.

00:49:07Still can't believe you threatened to lock me

00:49:09in a hot car with the windows rolled up, though.

00:49:10You remember that?

00:49:11Watch your back.

00:49:12Because this beef is officially back on.

00:49:16Bye, Xander.

00:49:17At this point, I don't even care if it's Xander's son.

00:49:19And I don't care how old he is.

00:49:20If he shows up, it's hands on sight.

00:49:22And that's on gang for real, for real, my baby.

00:49:25Huck!

00:49:27Oh.

00:49:28Oh, my.

00:49:29Hi.

00:49:30Look at him.

00:49:31Horace.

00:49:32Huck, look at you.

00:49:32Hi, how are you?

00:49:33Good to see you, buddy.

00:49:35You can go kick the boys.

00:49:36Leave me alone, Mom.

00:49:38Hey.

00:49:39What's up?

00:49:39Uncle Wayne.

00:49:40What's up?

00:49:41What's up?

00:49:42Good to see you.

00:49:42How are you?

00:49:43Hey.

00:49:44What's up, dude?

00:49:45God.

00:49:46What's up, son?

00:49:47Wasn't he just, like, 18 at the wedding?

00:49:50No.

00:49:51He grew up so fast.

00:49:53Isn't that weird, though?

00:49:55He's, like, an old guy now.

00:49:57Lexi, don't be rude.

00:49:58Seriously?

00:50:01Oh, snap.

00:50:02Hey, Bryce, I didn't even see you there.

00:50:07All right, guys.

00:50:08Back to my truck.

00:50:10So I've got to go.

00:50:11I've got to go.

00:50:12I've got to go.

00:50:13I've got to go.

00:50:14So I've been looking online.

00:50:16And it's been pretty hard to find

00:50:17a truck in the right price range that's thicker than Jathy's.

00:50:20Dude, that's so true.

00:50:21Jathy's truck is sick.

00:50:25Thank you, Duncan.

00:50:26Why don't you just steal Jathy's truck?

00:50:30What do you mean?

00:50:31F*** these fools, dude.

00:50:32I'm saying we jack the truck, replace the sound system,

00:50:35get a better one, paint it matte black,

00:50:37and then it's your truck.

00:50:38And they don't have one for the reunion.

00:50:40Problem solved.

00:50:41I mean, it would be way less expensive.

00:50:43So true.

00:50:44What do you think about all this, Hawk?

00:50:46To be honest, I really want to contribute

00:50:48right now to this conversation.

00:50:49But I'm getting the seriously off vibes

00:50:52from Duncan and Johnny.

00:50:53What's up with you guys?

00:50:56What are you talking?

00:50:56We're good.

00:50:57Everything's chill.

00:50:59No, yeah, I'm definitely sensing, like,

00:51:00a lot of dark aura energy right here.

00:51:02Something is definitely not OK right here.

00:51:04Right?

00:51:05Yeah, I noticed that earlier.

00:51:06I just didn't want to hear about it.

00:51:07Everything is fine between me and Johnny, OK?

00:51:09We got in a little tiff, and he got fired from work.

00:51:11But wait.

00:51:12What?

00:51:12Good call.

00:51:13Smart.

00:51:14Besides that, everything's cool.

00:51:15You fired Johnny?

00:51:15That's so weird, dude.

00:51:16He's your best friend.

00:51:17Everything's fine, guys.

00:51:19Seriously, everything is cool, right?

00:51:21I mean, nah.

00:51:23Not cool at all.

00:51:24Like, I'm feeling very overwhelmed.

00:51:26And, um, like, I don't know where to do with my life now,

00:51:30for real.

00:51:31Like, I just was doing this.

00:51:32All right, all right, all right.

00:51:33OK, OK, we get it.

00:51:34We get it.

00:51:34Duncan, let him speak.

00:51:35You'll stay out of this, big guy.

00:51:36Shut up, Bryce.

00:51:37It's not my fault you sucked at skating.

00:51:40Duncan, your vibes haven't been posy for months.

00:51:43And on top of that, you're being mean to me

00:51:45while we're getting ready for a huge drop

00:51:47and I'm running dunk surf solo?

00:51:49Also, you can date Danny and Tessa while lying

00:51:51about it and blaming me?

00:51:52What?

00:51:57Duncan, was he serious?

00:52:01What is that in her hand?

00:52:02Dude, it's a parabolic microphone.

00:52:04They could hear everything we were saying.

00:52:05Why does she have that?

00:52:06Molly, why are you eavesdropping?

00:52:08I was just showing them how it works.

00:52:10You've been dating Duncan?

00:52:11Yeah, since the wedding.

00:52:12What?

00:52:13I've been dating him since the wedding.

00:52:14I'm so confused.

00:52:15You guys are both dating Duncan?

00:52:18Hey, guys.

00:52:20Listen, first of all, let's just chill out, OK?

00:52:23I can fix this, all right?

00:52:24I have a plan.

00:52:25Have you seen the movie, Savages?

00:52:27The extremely underrated Oliver Stone movie

00:52:29with Blake Lively, where she's dating

00:52:30two Hawkeyes at the same time and they're

00:52:31living in a harmonious threshold?

00:52:33Exactly, yes.

00:52:34So I was thinking, what if the three of them?

00:52:36Oh!

00:52:37Oh.

00:52:38Oh.

00:52:39Oh, my god.

00:52:41I'm going to start a podcast just so I

00:52:43can talk shit about people.

00:52:44You don't mean that, Connie.

00:52:45You don't mean that.

00:52:46Sleep with one of your best friends.

00:52:48Oh!

00:52:49Which one you think?

00:52:50We can figure this out.

00:52:52Tess!

00:52:53Don!

00:52:57Ah!

00:53:00I don't want my picture taken right now.

00:53:04Idiot.

00:53:06Yo, yo.

00:53:07Hey, man.

00:53:08You mind hooking me up some grip tape for this deck?

00:53:10I don't know.

00:53:11Could you hook me up with reviving

00:53:12two shattered relationships with my ex-girlfriends

00:53:14or just beat my ass while all my friends watched?

00:53:18Nah, just the grip tape's fine.

00:53:20Yeah, dude.

00:53:21Give me your board.

00:53:22Totally.

00:53:23This is awesome.

00:53:24Thank you.

00:53:25Yo!

00:53:26Yo, yo, yo, yo, yo!

00:53:27Chill!

00:53:28Chill!

00:53:29What happened?

00:53:30He swung at me, Todd.

00:53:31He swung at me.

00:53:32I didn't swing.

00:53:33I didn't swing.

00:53:34He swung at me, Todd.

00:53:35He swung at me.

00:53:36I obviously did not.

00:53:37You swung at him?

00:53:38No, why would I do that?

00:53:39Hold me back, Todd.

00:53:40No, okay.

00:53:41I'm just gonna go to CalSurf for...

00:53:42No!

00:53:43Wait, come back.

00:53:44Just leave, bro.

00:53:45Let's go outside.

00:53:46Come on.

00:53:47We need to smoke a joint.

00:53:48Come back!

00:53:49You need a rip.

00:53:50Let's go.

00:53:51I had it all.

00:53:52Two smoking hot girlfriends,

00:53:53my own surf skate shop,

00:53:54a completely filled out punch card from Franco's Tacos,

00:53:56and now it's all gone.

00:53:59You don't realize how sad that moment is

00:54:03when you're eating those tacos

00:54:05and you don't have the punch card anymore.

00:54:07And they won't even let you punch another card

00:54:10until you come the next time.

00:54:12The free tacos can't count towards your next punch card.

00:54:15They told me that.

00:54:16They made sure I knew that.

00:54:18And I might even go to Michael's

00:54:19and get my own bull puncher.

00:54:34Oops.

00:54:42Feel any better?

00:54:44No.

00:54:45I still feel melancholy AF.

00:54:48Oh, that reminds me, dude.

00:54:50Your dad came by earlier today.

00:54:51He said buying the shop was a horrible investment,

00:54:54and if you don't get your numbers up by the reunion,

00:54:56he's turning it into a vape shop.

00:54:58What?

00:54:59I know.

00:55:00Dude, the reunion's in 10 days.

00:55:01Why did you wait till after the J to tell me that?

00:55:03Because if you knew, you would have bailed on the J.

00:55:05Of course I would have bailed on the J.

00:55:07I can't be high right now.

00:55:08Exactly.

00:55:09I knew it.

00:55:10But yeah, your dad seems pretty dead set

00:55:12on tanking this spot, man.

00:55:14He even offered me a job at his store down the street.

00:55:17What a dick.

00:55:18I know, right?

00:55:20Low-key took it, too.

00:55:22What?

00:55:23It's wild, bro.

00:55:24I work at Cal Surf now.

00:55:25I should probably get going, honestly.

00:55:27Your dad runs a tight shit, bro.

00:55:29I don't want to be late.

00:55:30Tucker, what the S?

00:55:31What am I going to do now?

00:55:32Well, my Uber's here.

00:55:34I gotta go.

00:55:36How did you time that so perfectly?

00:55:39Tucker!

00:55:41Tuck!

00:55:43Tuck!

00:55:46Tucker!

00:55:51What's good?

00:55:52Welcome back to On My Pod,

00:55:54the most inspirational pod in all of Simi.

00:55:57For sure.

00:55:58I just want to start off by saying that

00:56:00I think the problem with this generation

00:56:02is that guys these days,

00:56:04they just want to date two women at once

00:56:05and own a surf shop, you know?

00:56:07After I discovered that Duncan was cheating on me

00:56:10with his ex-girlfriend and my third best friend,

00:56:13I started sending him a bunch of angry voice memos.

00:56:16And that's when I discovered

00:56:18I love the sound of my own voice.

00:56:20That's why I decided to start the pod.

00:56:23Because I know Wade feels the same way.

00:56:26Here's what you do.

00:56:27What?

00:56:28You buy a cheap fixer-upper for $1, $1.5,

00:56:30you know, put $500 into it,

00:56:32sell it for $15 million.

00:56:34It's easier than you think it is.

00:56:35Exactly.

00:56:36Well, that's what I'm talking about

00:56:37when it comes to manifesting, gratitude journaling.

00:56:39If you think about it, you can achieve it.

00:56:41You've kind of inspired me right now.

00:56:42And I just want to say,

00:56:43if you are over the age of 25,

00:56:46and you're not flipping houses

00:56:48for 750% profit,

00:56:51you're a failure.

00:56:53Loser.

00:56:54And you should seriously consider

00:56:55re-evaluating your life and your whole friend group.

00:56:57Right.

00:56:58Here's the thing, though.

00:56:59My dumb older brother and his dumb wife

00:57:01want me to mess up my morning routine

00:57:03and get a 9-to-5, which I'm not cool with.

00:57:05I'm going to drop that link in the bio for you guys.

00:57:06How am I supposed to know?

00:57:07When am I supposed to know?

00:57:08Exactly, Wade.

00:57:09Sup?

00:57:10Dude, Molly, can you not?

00:57:12We're rolling, clearly.

00:57:13Oh, my God.

00:57:14Zan!

00:57:15And actually, that brings us to our sponsor.

00:57:18Okay, we talked about this.

00:57:20You said you were telling him to move,

00:57:22not telling him to set up a podcast studio.

00:57:24Okay, I know, but he's been really helpful

00:57:26with the truck search,

00:57:27and it's good to, like, have him here

00:57:29for, you know, research purposes.

00:57:31To be honest, this kind of feels like the last straw.

00:57:34Okay, here we go again with the last straw.

00:57:37What does that even mean, Molly?

00:57:39Like, what kind of a situation

00:57:41even involves picking straws

00:57:43and the last one sucks?

00:57:45Like, what is that?

00:57:46Is it a sea turtle thing?

00:57:47Because I told you,

00:57:48that's all propaganda to distract us

00:57:51from the fact that the real problem

00:57:53is these industrial fishing boats, Molly.

00:57:55They kill way more sea turtles than plastic straws.

00:57:58It's a metaphor!

00:57:59I told you, I hate metaphors!

00:58:04Why are you so aggro lately?

00:58:07I'm not aggro!

00:58:08Okay.

00:58:09Honestly, Molly has said this is the last straw

00:58:12so many times,

00:58:13I'm starting to feel like this is the last straw.

00:58:15Plus, I don't even use straws.

00:58:18Well, I guess there was that one time.

00:58:22But not anymore.

00:58:23If Wade isn't out of the house by the reunion,

00:58:26we're done.

00:58:27And I mean actual last straw.

00:58:33Where are you even going?

00:58:34To work.

00:58:35To sell houses

00:58:36so one of us can show up to the reunion looking sick.

00:58:39You tiny truck-having ass.

00:58:42After my conversation with Molly,

00:58:44it's pretty clear that stealing Jaffee's truck

00:58:46should be the number one priority in my life right now.

00:58:49It's a complicated operation, though,

00:58:51so I decided to call an emergency heist planning meeting.

00:58:55You guys all watch Ocean's Eleven like I told you to?

00:58:58Sick.

00:58:59Alright, so look.

00:59:00As far as the plan goes,

00:59:02Molly's real estate company

00:59:04is having a broker's open at Jaffee's house.

00:59:07I was gonna say we put a spy cam on her

00:59:09to send her in and get some intel,

00:59:11but unfortunately, she's gone rogue and can't be trusted.

00:59:15So what I'm thinking is...

00:59:16Can you guys have this conversation somewhere else?

00:59:18Sandra, eyes down, take the test, okay?

00:59:21And if anybody else wants to listen in on this sick combo

00:59:24between me and my bros over here,

00:59:26that's detention.

00:59:27Well, we're trying, but it's kind of hard

00:59:29when you're discussing such felonious behavior in front of us.

00:59:31Yeah, I don't want to be an accessory to this weak-ass plan.

00:59:35Weak plan?

00:59:36I'm sorry, dude.

00:59:37It's not a weak plan, okay?

00:59:39This is gonna be sick.

00:59:40Are you even going to the reunion?

00:59:41Ooh, duh.

00:59:43Alright.

00:59:44Beta, this guy doesn't even burn, dude.

00:59:46We all know.

00:59:47You told your high school homies I don't burn?

00:59:49Yeah.

00:59:50Come on, dude.

00:59:51Screw you guys, dude.

00:59:52I do burn.

00:59:53Alright, everybody shut up.

00:59:54Unless you have a sick idea for me and my bros,

00:59:58I don't want to hear a peep.

00:59:59Why don't you guys just steal the trucks during the open house

01:00:01while everyone's distracted inside?

01:00:03Yeah, I mean, that's a good idea.

01:00:05I like the whole Ocean's 11 thing,

01:00:06but if you're gonna do it,

01:00:07like, you guys should dress up as the waitstaff.

01:00:10It would be kind of sick to dress up as the waitstaff.

01:00:14I've, like, always wanted to do that.

01:00:16Could you imagine?

01:00:18Dressing up like the waitstaff?

01:00:20Oh, man.

01:00:21I'm getting fired up just thinking about it.

01:00:23You're excited about that?

01:00:24Yeah, have you guys not?

01:00:25No, dude, this plan works.

01:00:27You and Johnny dress as the waitstaff,

01:00:29Bryce shows up, creates a diversion,

01:00:31me and Dunk and him.

01:00:32Oh, dude, no, dude.

01:00:33I don't think we can rely on Johnny for this, man.

01:00:35Looks like he's doing ayahuasca with Aldis.

01:00:38Goodness gracious.

01:00:40Dunk, you really messed him up, bro.

01:00:42That's my bad.

01:00:43I think he's trying to smash Tess.

01:00:47I beg your pardon?

01:00:49From the back.

01:00:53Would you be pissed if someone did that?

01:00:55Uh, would I be pissed if someone was piping my ex?

01:00:59Yeah, I'd be pretty pissed.

01:01:01Oh, not that.

01:01:02Bryce.

01:01:04Oh, yeah, come on in.

01:01:05We're just having a meeting, you know?

01:01:08Okay, what are y'all...

01:01:10You know what? I don't even care.

01:01:12Can I speak to you privately, please?

01:01:14Miss me?

01:01:15Anything you want to say to me,

01:01:16you can say in front of my boys and my class.

01:01:19Okay, fine.

01:01:21After hearing that you altered the grades

01:01:23of two of your students,

01:01:25I'm putting you on indefinite administrative leave.

01:01:28I don't care.

01:01:29I don't care.

01:01:30I don't care.

01:01:31I don't care.

01:01:32I don't care.

01:01:33I don't care.

01:01:34I don't care.

01:01:35I'm putting you on indefinite administrative leave.

01:01:37Oh, my God.

01:01:40Y'all snitched?

01:01:46If you want to stay in this family,

01:01:48you got to sell houses.

01:01:50And be hot.

01:01:52I'll stab anyone in the back to get what I want.

01:01:54My clients are some of the richest people

01:01:57in the entire world.

01:01:59High-profile clients.

01:02:01I just like saying the word clients.

01:02:03Half the time, I don't even understand

01:02:05how this business works.

01:02:07But it's working.

01:02:33Hey.

01:02:35Welcome to mi casa.

01:02:37Oh, wait.

01:02:38Wait, this is your house?

01:02:40Yeah, babes.

01:02:41This is my house.

01:02:42Oh, why are you selling your house?

01:02:44Well, I sell my house every quarter or so

01:02:47to help keep the numbers up.

01:02:50Seems stressful.

01:02:52I want to make the investors happy.

01:02:54They love to see money move.

01:02:56Guess what?

01:02:57My bathroom's right there if you want to change.

01:02:59Oh, um, this is me.

01:03:01Yeah, went with the suit.

01:03:03Oh, that's so cute.

01:03:06I love that.

01:03:08Oh, my God, adorable.

01:03:10Ventura.

01:03:11Topanga.

01:03:12Molly, hey.

01:03:14What's up?

01:03:15Molly, you're the new girl.

01:03:18If there's one thing that I know about Topanga,

01:03:20it's that she is not afraid to drill the new girl.

01:03:24So how many houses have you sold this quarter?

01:03:27Oh, well, none.

01:03:29You know, I just started two weeks ago, so...

01:03:32Molly, do you know who I just sold a house to?

01:03:35Oh, no, who?

01:03:37You know who Billie Eilish is?

01:03:39Yeah.

01:03:40I just sold a house to her chiropractor, so...

01:03:42Oh, I bet you'd like to know who my clients are.

01:03:45Yeah.

01:03:46Well, I can't tell you that's super confidential.

01:03:48Oh, I sold a house to Howie Mandel.

01:03:50No one f***ing cares, Ventura.

01:03:52Oh, speaking of clients,

01:03:54mine just arrived, so I'll be right back.

01:03:59Hey!

01:04:00Thank God you guys are here.

01:04:01What is happening?

01:04:02Is this an open house,

01:04:04or is there, like, another reality show being shot?

01:04:08Ha ha!

01:04:09So...

01:04:10Just go with it.

01:04:11Dani, what do you think?

01:04:13I think it's pretty sick.

01:04:16Want to make an offer?

01:04:18I noticed that you had flip houses for passive income

01:04:20on your vision board.

01:04:21I do, but, you know, that's not until later in the year,

01:04:23after I've lived in the south of France.

01:04:25We've talked about that.

01:04:26Oh, are you going to live in the south of France?

01:04:28I'm manifesting it, yes.

01:04:29Are you really?

01:04:30Or are you going to lie to my face about that

01:04:32the way you lied to my face about dating Duncan?

01:04:34I don't like what you're saying,

01:04:35so I'm going to put up a boundary, R.N., okay?

01:04:37I do not have the bandwidth for you.

01:04:39Oh, my God.

01:04:40You guys, stop. Stop it.

01:04:41This date has to go well for me, okay?

01:04:43Play it cool.

01:04:47Let's steal this f***ing truck, bro!

01:04:49Dude, I am so dialed in right now.

01:04:52Bro, me too. I am dialed.

01:04:54I am Buffalo Dialed Wings right now.

01:04:56Yeah, I'm Crocodile Dundee right now.

01:04:58Dude, I'm Dialedly Cyrus.

01:05:00All right, enough with the puns, dude.

01:05:02They're not even funny.

01:05:03Damn, dude.

01:05:04Where's Bryce, dude?

01:05:05Bro.

01:05:06Uh, he said, can't make it, something came up,

01:05:08hit me up later.

01:05:09What, are you yanking my nutsack, bro?

01:05:11That's what he said.

01:05:12Ugh!

01:05:13Well, what should we do?

01:05:14Should we call it off?

01:05:15Dude, can't you just mob the truck out yourself

01:05:17in your shop?

01:05:18Like, we could use some of my, like,

01:05:19morning routine stuff

01:05:20and Danny's manifestation techniques.

01:05:22That could be sick.

01:05:23Hey, Wade?

01:05:24Just because you have a podcat,

01:05:26it doesn't make your ideas good.

01:05:27Okay, bro?

01:05:28Is manifestation gonna get me the 100K

01:05:30that I need to mob out my truck?

01:05:32No.

01:05:33The only thing that would yield that kind of cash

01:05:35is selling my house,

01:05:36and there's no way in hell

01:05:37Molly would let me do that.

01:05:38So Wade should probably shut his trap.

01:05:41Also, Bryce isn't here, dude.

01:05:43This plan is going to shit.

01:05:45No, no, no, no, no!

01:05:47F***!

01:05:49Someone just blocked it in!

01:05:51Oh, the plan is ruined!

01:05:54So it's getting pretty obvious

01:05:55that Zonder's on steroids.

01:05:57And I realize now that all the times

01:05:59he said he was going to a juice bar,

01:06:01it was a steroid juice bar.

01:06:03And I don't know if he realizes

01:06:05you have to, like, work out more

01:06:06when you're on steroids.

01:06:08So it's not like he's that much bigger.

01:06:11He's just, like, way more mad.

01:06:13Bro, dude, it's fine.

01:06:15It'll be okay, man.

01:06:16I'll just go inside and convince

01:06:17whosoever car it is

01:06:18that I think it's super sick

01:06:19and I want to go for a ride.

01:06:20You seriously think you're gonna be able

01:06:21to convince someone

01:06:22that their PT Cruiser is sick?

01:06:24Dude, yes, man.

01:06:26Bro, I can act.

01:06:27You guys forget I'm an artist.

01:06:29Act?

01:06:30Well, in the words of Mark Zuckerberg,

01:06:33go in there, jack this guy's shit,

01:06:35paint it a different color,

01:06:36and pass it off as our own.

01:06:38Steal Jathew's truck on three.

01:06:39One, two, three.

01:06:40Steal Jathew's truck!

01:06:41I'll disable the camera with my lasers.

01:06:43Let's get tactical, boys.

01:06:45Let's get tactical, boys.

01:06:52♪♪♪♪

01:07:02♪♪♪♪

01:07:14You see any randos tonight,

01:07:15you know what to do, right?

01:07:16Yeah, murder them.

01:07:17What?

01:07:18No, just, like, ask them to leave.

01:07:19Nice and...

01:07:20It's been a million hours.

01:07:21Nine-nine is hot.

01:07:22No one cares about, like, Sam Martin.

01:07:24Hors d'oeuvres?

01:07:25Um, I'm good.

01:07:26Yo, by the way,

01:07:27do you guys know who's PT Cruiser

01:07:28that is outside?

01:07:30No, why?

01:07:31She's super sick.

01:07:32I want to see my cop one.

01:07:34Okay.

01:07:35Okay.

01:07:36Ha-ha-ha-ha, totally.

01:07:37Yo, do you guys know who's PT Cruiser

01:07:39that is in the driveway, by the way?

01:07:40Nah, man.

01:07:41Wade?

01:07:42Nah, you don't know?

01:07:43No.

01:07:44Luxy.

01:07:45What's up?

01:07:46Didn't know you'd be here.

01:07:47What's up, JP?

01:07:48What's up, dude?

01:07:49What are you doing here?

01:07:50You're a waiter now?

01:07:51Yeah, just making bank, you know.

01:07:53Uh, trying to figure out

01:07:54who's the sick-ass PT Cruiser

01:07:55who's in the driveway, but...

01:07:56Dude, that's mine.

01:07:58You dig it?

01:07:59Oh.

01:08:00Uh...

01:08:01Yeah, dude.

01:08:03Yes.

01:08:04It's awesome.

01:08:05Wait, that's yours?

01:08:06Yes, dude, that's mine.

01:08:07All stock, no tints?

01:08:08You guessed it, brother.

01:08:09Oh, man, what a whip.

01:08:11Yeah.

01:08:12Dude, crazy idea.

01:08:14What if we went for a spin right now?

01:08:16Like, right now?

01:08:18I'm game if you're game.

01:08:19Okay.

01:08:20Uh...

01:08:21See you, Lexi.

01:08:22Let's go.

01:08:23Okay, my shift just ended,

01:08:24so let's do it.

01:08:28First, Wade acts like a kid

01:08:29because I brought Aldis to the kickback.

01:08:31Now he shows up unannounced to this party

01:08:33dressed as a waiter,

01:08:35all to stop me from talking to JP.

01:08:38This is the type of immature,

01:08:39jealous boyfriend energy

01:08:41that I am missing in my life.

01:08:44Like, maybe I should invite Wade

01:08:46to the reunion.

01:08:47So, Dani, what do you think?

01:08:49Are you interested in buying this house or what?

01:08:51Oh, um...

01:08:53Not right now, no.

01:08:55Oh.

01:08:56Okay.

01:08:57Lexi, what about you?

01:08:58How much is it?

01:08:592.3, but for you,

01:09:01I could do 2.299.

01:09:03Mm, I'm really gonna have to

01:09:05marinate on that for a beat.

01:09:07Huh.

01:09:08Okay, Molly,

01:09:09can I play you for a quick chat?

01:09:10Yeah.

01:09:11Okay, great.

01:09:13I don't understand.

01:09:14What's going on?

01:09:15Is she poor?

01:09:16No, no.

01:09:17Like, she's not poor.

01:09:18Her dad's actually, like, super rich.

01:09:20I don't know what our deal is right now.

01:09:21Okay, well, it's been two weeks.

01:09:23You haven't sold a single home

01:09:24or gotten anyone under you

01:09:26to take commission from.

01:09:27The funnel is dying.

01:09:29Like, do you even want to do this?

01:09:32I don't get it.

01:09:33I do.

01:09:34I just...

01:09:35Just what?

01:09:36I just need more time.

01:09:37Well, Molly, if you don't sell a house

01:09:38before the reunion,

01:09:40I'm gonna have to ask you to kick rocks.

01:09:43How am I supposed to sell a house this fast?

01:09:45The only person I know who owns a house is me.

01:09:49Am I gonna have to sell my own house?

01:09:52Um, just give me a second.

01:09:54I'm gonna call Xander.

01:10:00Oh, my God, Xander!

01:10:01I was literally just calling you.

01:10:03So, I need a really big favor.

01:10:05Uh, yeah.

01:10:06What's up?

01:10:07What's good?

01:10:08Okay, so I know I just started this job

01:10:10and that we really love our house,

01:10:12but we're gonna need to sell it.

01:10:15What, like, now?

01:10:17Yeah, as soon as possible.

01:10:19Well, this is perfect.

01:10:21Just when I was about to steal Jackie's truck.

01:10:28Oh, why not?

01:10:30Uh, I was just kidding.

01:10:33Point is, Molly just came through with a solution

01:10:36to get enough funds to trick out the truck myself.

01:10:39Now, I just need to pretend that I didn't also want this.

01:10:43That way, I have leverage.

01:10:45All right, fine.

01:10:46But only because I love you so much.

01:10:48Seriously?

01:10:49Yeah.

01:10:50Oh, my God.

01:10:51But I just might need one thing, though.

01:10:53Anything.

01:10:54If we do sell the house,

01:10:56would I maybe be able to take some of those funds

01:10:58and allot them to building out my truck?

01:11:02I mean, it's only fair.

01:11:05All right, then, but you owe me big time.

01:11:08Thank you.

01:11:10Zan!

01:11:12What are you doing here?

01:11:14Yeah, what are you doing here?

01:11:16And why do you look so sketch?

01:11:18Are those the keys to my truck?

01:11:21Oh, uh...

01:11:23Don't say another f***ing word.

01:11:25I'm not stupid.

01:11:28I know what you're doing, dude.

01:11:30And I'm not even mad.

01:11:33You're not?

01:11:34No, man.

01:11:35No, man.

01:11:36Xander Sanders.

01:11:39Showing up to my pad,

01:11:41dressed as a robber,

01:11:44on some kinky roleplay shit?

01:11:46My God!

01:11:49You're about to rob dog her in my truck, huh?

01:11:52Yeah.

01:11:54Oh, my God, were you really?

01:11:55Yeah, I was about to, like, rail you so hard.

01:12:00Poundtown, right?

01:12:02Yeah, dude, you know it, dude.

01:12:04I'm the mayor of Poundtown.

01:12:06Oh, dude, I love that.

01:12:08Yes.

01:12:09F*** yeah.

01:12:10F***ing love it, dude.

01:12:12God, yes!

01:12:14You have my blessing, bro.

01:12:16You two have fun in there, okay?

01:12:18There's a remote for the TV and a center console

01:12:20if you want to throw on a flick.

01:12:21Oh, my God, okay.

01:12:23Whoa.

01:12:24All right, cool.

01:12:25Go get in Jackie's truck, wait 45 minutes,

01:12:27come back in looking disheveled

01:12:29and tell him you just had the best sex of your life, all right?

01:12:31Wait, wait, what?

01:12:32What are you talking about?

01:12:33So we're not actually smashing right now?

01:12:35Then what are you doing here?

01:12:37There's no time to explain.

01:12:39Okay, well, what am I supposed to do,

01:12:41just sit in the truck for, like, 45 minutes?

01:12:43That is not even realistic, it's more like five.

01:12:45Okay, fine, 20.

01:12:47Ten.

01:12:48Molly, I just let you sell the house, okay?

01:12:52You owe me big time, big time.

01:13:02Wait, what's he doing?

01:13:07Dude, what happened?

01:13:08Change of plans.

01:13:16Yeah.

01:13:17Pretty cool.

01:13:18Yeah.

01:13:19So stoked you dig the whip, though.

01:13:21Yeah, Jathew and them always give me shit for it.

01:13:24At least I actually bought this.

01:13:25You know, I'd rather own my own car

01:13:27than take out a bunch of frauded-out loans

01:13:28and get a sick one like Jathew's.

01:13:30Only a matter of time

01:13:31till the feds catch on to his bullshit.

01:13:34Oh, yeah, totally, man, totally.

01:13:38Wait, what the hell?

01:13:40What?

01:13:42Uh, nothing, dude.

01:13:43We should dip.

01:13:44Um, fire car, though.

01:13:46Wait, you don't want to smoke this?

01:13:48Uh, I wish we had time, dude,

01:13:50but I really got to get back.

01:13:51You just drove up to Chet's Peak, though.

01:13:53I'd love to, man, but there's no time.

01:13:55Wow.

01:13:56So it is true.

01:13:59Wait, wait, wait.

01:14:00What's true?

01:14:03Nothing.

01:14:05No, what's true?

01:14:10Wait, wait, wait.

01:14:11No, no, no, no, no, no.

01:14:12Hold your horses.

01:14:14What's true?

01:14:15I just heard that you don't burn.

01:14:17Okay.

01:14:18You think I, Wade Colonel Sanders, doesn't burn?

01:14:22Okay, yeah, right.

01:14:24Well, then you either cheap this thing down

01:14:26or it's official that you don't burn.

01:14:30Is that good for you?

01:14:35There is no way that's happening right now.

01:14:39I'm sick of these games, man.

01:14:44Dude, where is he?

01:14:45Dude, he hasn't texted me back.

01:14:46He's taking way too long.

01:14:47We got to just dip.

01:14:48Yeah, let's just dip.

01:14:49Let's just dip, dude.

01:14:50Let's just dip.

01:14:53Oh, come on.

01:14:54Hey.

01:14:57Dude.

01:14:58Yo.

01:15:02All right, well, maybe I'll see you later, Wade, or...

01:15:05Wade.

01:15:06What?

01:15:07Yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure.

01:15:08Wow, dude.

01:15:10Wow.

01:15:11Yo, it was too hot, bro.

01:15:12We had to dip.

01:15:13What?

01:15:14I can see you right there.

01:15:15Just back up.

01:15:16All right.

01:15:17Should we call you back for him?

01:15:18I don't know.

01:15:19I can hear you debating it.

01:15:20Just come back.

01:15:21All right, fine.

01:15:22Yo, what happened?

01:15:23I moved the PT.

01:15:24Yo, could you not find the keys?

01:15:25No, I had them, but then I ran into Molly and Jackie, dude.

01:15:28Was he on to you?

01:15:29No, it's like a long, weird story, but basically, Molly's selling the house,

01:15:32and I don't have enough money to mod out the truck myself.

01:15:35Wait, what?

01:15:36Wait, what?

01:15:37Wait, why did we just do all this?

01:15:38Yeah, dude, you're selling the house?

01:15:40Where am I going to live, dude?

01:15:41Right, dude.

01:15:42Right?

01:15:43Where am I going to do my podcast?

01:15:44That's your first concern?

01:15:45Where are you going to do your podcast?

01:15:46Yeah, dude, definitely.

01:15:47Look, it's way better this way, all right?

01:15:49We're not committing a felony.

01:15:50We're not stealing Jackie's truck.

01:15:51We just got to get to the body shop and build out my truck.

01:15:54We, dude?

01:15:55We just wasted all this time?

01:15:57Dude, I can't do this right now, dude.

01:15:59I have to get back to Dunkster before my dad shuts me down.

01:16:01You're seriously going to ruin our reunion pull-up situation

01:16:04because you're a terrible small business owner, dude?

01:16:06Dude, just give it up, okay?

01:16:08You're not going to have a sicker truck than Jathu in time.

01:16:10Dude, we should have just stolen Jathu's truck.

01:16:12It would have been way easier than this.

01:16:16You know what, boys?

01:16:17I'm headed to the body shop, all right?

01:16:19If you guys aren't going to help, get out of the car right now.

01:16:22Get out of the car right now.

01:16:23Whatever, dude, I live two blocks away.

01:16:25I'll walk.

01:16:26All right.

01:16:27You're still going to take me home, right?

01:16:28I'll take you.

01:16:29All right, fine.

01:16:30Great.

01:16:31Glad that's settled.

01:16:32Good.

01:16:33Everyone has rides.

01:16:34Now get the f*** out of my car, dude.

01:16:39God damn it!

01:16:41This is pretty much my all is lost moment.

01:16:44Stupid pencils.

01:16:45I've given all I could to this truck search.

01:16:48But without the boys helping me, I just don't think it's possible.

01:16:54Xander!

01:16:55Dad?

01:16:57What are you doing here?

01:16:58Well, I come here to see you, make sure you're okay.

01:17:01Hell, I haven't seen you in the whole damn movie.

01:17:03Yeah, well, whatever.

01:17:04I've just been busy, okay?

01:17:05What the hell are you doing?

01:17:08I don't think I'm going to have the sickest truck in time for the reunion.

01:17:11Okay?

01:17:12I tried, but I just don't think I'm going to do it.

01:17:16Don't think I'm going to do it.

01:17:17I don't think I have time.

01:17:18I don't think I have the resources.

01:17:20And I'm sorry, all right?

01:17:21I let you down.

01:17:22I let Grandpa down.

01:17:23And I'm just a big failure.

01:17:24But it's fine.

01:17:25I'll just be the most jacked.

01:17:27Oh, son.

01:17:29Is that what this is all about, huh?

01:17:31You think that I'm going to be upset if you don't win that truck of the year trophy from your high school reunion?

01:17:39Yeah.

01:17:41Oh, Xander.

01:17:42Xander.

01:17:44You're goddamn right.

01:17:48I wouldn't be upset.

01:17:50I'd be goddamn furious.

01:17:53I'd be embarrassed of you.

01:17:54Disappointed in you.

01:17:56I would no longer be able to call you my son.

01:18:02But Dad.

01:18:03You better f****** win that f****** trophy.

01:18:13F***.

01:18:26Hector.

01:18:29It's go time.

01:18:32What does that even mean, dog?

01:18:33It means it's time to execute plan C.

01:18:38How long do we have?

01:18:39Dude, like 72 hours.

01:18:4172 hours? No mamas, dog. That's impossible.

01:18:43I know, right? Let's do this, brother.

01:19:12Do you want to be a winner? Do you want results? Huh?

01:19:16Do you want the things that you want in life? Do you want your dreams to come true?

01:19:20Well, then ditch whatever it is you're currently doing and get a morning routine.

01:19:27Xander.

01:19:30Xander.

01:19:32Xander.

01:19:34Xander.

01:19:36Xander.

01:19:38Xander.

01:19:39Xander.

01:19:40Xander.

01:19:41Xander.

01:19:42Xander.

01:19:43Xander.

01:20:00Your cornea's out.

01:20:01Yeah, yeah. Yeah, your cornea's out.

01:20:10Oh!

01:20:26Aw, yeah!

01:20:31Aw, yeah!

01:20:40♪♪

01:20:50♪♪

01:20:54Oh, my God!

01:20:56Bro!

01:20:58It's so big!

01:20:59Huge, dog. Look at the size, dog!

01:21:01Oh, my God!

01:21:03I did it.

01:21:11Okay.

01:21:12-♪♪

01:21:20♪♪

01:21:30♪♪

01:21:34We did it!

01:21:35Ha ha, we're about to flex so hard

01:21:37on everyone at this reunion.

01:21:38Aren't we all so stoked?

01:21:40You're in a lot of scoffs, yo.

01:21:46Does someone have something to say?

01:21:47Uh, I got a problem.

01:21:48The cold truck and everything, but the ratio's way off yet again.

01:21:51What?

01:21:52What is he saying, Wade?

01:21:53He said cold truck and everything, but the ratio's off.

01:21:55You serious, Bryce?

01:21:56Serious, Bryce.

01:21:57It's four to four, bro.

01:21:58Four to four, bro.

01:22:00It would appear that our egotistical pursuit of reunion sickness has completely dismantled

01:22:04our squad.

01:22:05And I'm high-key tripping that Wade's about to snitch on me and Tessa.

01:22:08So right now I'm just trying to stir the pot up with as much stuff as I can think of.

01:22:11Tell him it should be one to three guys to chicks.

01:22:14Supposed to be one to three dudes to chicks?

01:22:16Bryce, you want me to pull this truck over and we can square up right now?

01:22:18I mean, yeah, let's do it.

01:22:19Pull over right now.

01:22:20I'll beat your ass even though you're juicing.

01:22:21I'm not juicing, dude.

01:22:22Yes, you are, fool.

01:22:24Martinelli up there.

01:22:25Dude, I'm not juicing.

01:22:26I swear on Hawk's life.

01:22:29Okay, Xander, shut up, okay?

01:22:31And everyone, stop fighting.

01:22:33Let's just get there and get this over with, please?

01:22:36Dude.

01:22:57What's going on, everybody?

01:22:59Welcome to the See Me High 10-Year Reunion.

01:23:03There's trucks, there's former flames, there's exes.

01:23:06I mean, it could get heated tonight.

01:23:09Plenty of opportunity for beef, Tad, that's for sure.

01:23:12Whoa, dude, Tad, we got breaking news.

01:23:14I think I'm seeing a sixth door come through.

01:23:16What?

01:23:17Oh, my God.

01:23:34Okay, I'm going inside.

01:23:35Yeah, I need a monster.

01:23:36I'm cold.

01:23:37Okay.

01:23:38Guys.

01:23:40Guys, wait up.

01:23:41Guys.

01:23:43We're supposed to have a moment.

01:23:44Xander Sanders.

01:23:46Oh, snap.

01:23:47What's up, Chauncey Donahue?

01:23:49Look at you, man.

01:23:50Holy freaking cow, nice truck.

01:23:52Thanks, Doug.

01:23:53Yeah, what have you been up to?

01:23:55What, like for the last 10 years?

01:23:57Yeah, dude, I want all the details.

01:23:59I haven't seen you once.

01:24:00Please.

01:24:01The first person I run into is Chauncey Donahue.

01:24:04Boner.

01:24:06Dude has no idea how hard he's about to get flexed on.

01:24:09Run a body shop with my boy Hector.

01:24:12Married Molly.

01:24:13Had a kid.

01:24:14He grew up.

01:24:15Went off to school.

01:24:16He's all an adult now and shit.

01:24:17And, uh, yeah, have the sickest truck in all of Simi.

01:24:20That's about it.

01:24:22Damn.

01:24:24What a storybook life you've led, man.

01:24:26You must be so happy.

01:24:28Off to a strong start, but there's no time to waste.

01:24:31There's over 100 people here that I haven't seen since graduation,

01:24:35and we need to impress all of them.

01:24:48What have you been up to, man?

01:24:50So what have you been up to?

01:24:51What have you been up to?

01:24:52What have you been up to?

01:24:53Honestly, just, like, managing the F out of my skate shop.

01:24:58What have you been up to?

01:24:59Recently been selling houses.

01:25:00Just sold one the other day, actually.

01:25:02So what's up?

01:25:03You guys still brothers?

01:25:04Yeah.

01:25:05Yeah.

01:25:06I teach lit, so it's pretty lit, you know.

01:25:08Been really getting into manifestation lately.

01:25:10Oh, my God, you should come on my podcast.

01:25:11Started a podcast.

01:25:12Everything was going according to plan.

01:25:15But what we forgot to take into account

01:25:17was the part of the conversation that we didn't care about.

01:25:20What about you?

01:25:21What have you been up to?

01:25:22What have you been up to, though?

01:25:23How about you guys?

01:25:24We started a mushroom company.

01:25:26I'm, like, sanctioning, like, gerbil fights in, like, Thailand and stuff.

01:25:29I go to jujitsu.

01:25:30I roll with this guy, Ronaldo.

01:25:31He's super Brazilian.

01:25:32I can't understand a word he says.

01:25:33I've been foodistic for a long time, which has been great.

01:25:35We're doing mushroom pancakes.

01:25:37Pancakes.

01:25:38Mushroom latkes.

01:25:39After listening to all these people talk about their lives,

01:25:44I just sort of had this epiphany where I realized, like,

01:25:49wait a second.

01:25:52I don't give a f*** about any of these people.

01:25:56We got to hang soon, man.

01:25:57We should get coffee.

01:25:58We got to hang soon.

01:25:59Dude, we got to, like, hang out soon.

01:26:01Yeah, no, we'll definitely hang soon, and I'm not just saying that.

01:26:04We're not either.

01:26:05You remember that one time?

01:26:06Yeah, yeah.

01:26:08I remember that other time.

01:26:11You go up all the time.

01:26:13I want you for a chat.

01:26:15Sorry for pulling you out of that convo with Wesley Watershed.

01:26:18I just wanted to have a quick chat.

01:26:20Oh, no.

01:26:21That conversation sucked.

01:26:23This whole thing sucks, actually.

01:26:26Are Jathew and Agora even here?

01:26:28Seems like they're trying to make some grand entrance.

01:26:31I feel so dumb for caring so much about this.

01:26:34I know, Sam.

01:26:35All right, look, Molly.

01:26:38I have a confession to make, okay?

01:26:43I've been juicing.

01:26:44I'm on rides.

01:26:46I know, Sam.

01:26:47I told you!

01:26:50Of course I'm going to invest in your company, bro.

01:26:52It sounds like a million-dollar idea.

01:26:55Just when I was about to Irish goodbye this reunion,

01:26:57I look across the bar, and I see Johnny wearing the sickest suit I have ever seen.

01:27:02And he looked like he was doing pretty well without me.

01:27:07And that didn't feel too good.

01:27:09What's up, man?

01:27:10What's up, Donk?

01:27:11How's it going?

01:27:12You slut.

01:27:13How are you?

01:27:14Hey, look, dude.

01:27:15I just want to get this out in the open.

01:27:18My bad for everything.

01:27:20You're one of my best friends, and third, to be exact.

01:27:24Third best friend?

01:27:25You really mean that?

01:27:26Yes, dude, third.

01:27:27It goes Zan, Bryce.

01:27:30Okay, wait.

01:27:31Okay, so you're actually your fourth.

01:27:33I could be fine with that if we'd lock that in,

01:27:35if we'd, like, make sure it doesn't leave fourth.

01:27:37Dude, I was just caught up with all my own stuff, you know?

01:27:40And I disrespected you, and that wasn't cool.

01:27:43And honestly, dude, I need you back at Dunk Surf.

01:27:46I miss you.

01:27:48Things have been a vibe lately.

01:27:50I did Ayahuasca with Aldis when I was gone,

01:27:52and I talked to God, bro.

01:27:54God was like, if your squad doesn't put you in the group text

01:27:58that they're constantly talking about,

01:28:00and if they have, like, a reality show for the last three seasons

01:28:03and they haven't even put, like, a sliver of you in the intro

01:28:06and all this stuff with Danny and Tess,

01:28:08maybe you should start your own squad.

01:28:12So I've kind of come to terms with that, you know?

01:28:14And I'm happy now.

01:28:16Yeah, I get it, man. I'm stoked for you.

01:28:18But then all that stuff you just said, it's like...

01:28:22God can take an effing walk, because I'm with the boys.

01:28:25Yo! Okay.

01:28:27All right. Hell yeah.

01:28:29I don't want to be, like, a Steven Stickler on this,

01:28:32but I know you said, like, my bad a bunch,

01:28:35but for some reason, just the word sorry

01:28:38would personally just, like, really hit.

01:28:40Yeah, yeah.

01:28:41Well, look, man, if it means anything...

01:28:44It would, yeah.

01:28:46I want you to know from the bottom of my heart,

01:28:48it's my bad. Super my bad.

01:28:52Yeah, and my bad for letting you down, you know?

01:28:54I just need to focus on Dunk right now.

01:28:57And I actually do have to go apologize to Danny and Tessa.

01:29:01And not just say my bad,

01:29:03but, like, actually tell them I'm sorry.

01:29:07Wade Sanders.

01:29:09Yes?

01:29:11Well, aren't you class of 2013?

01:29:14Oh, 2013, am I?

01:29:16Well, let's get...

01:29:17Guess what?

01:29:18Is that a taser?

01:29:19Tis.

01:29:20Jesus Christ.

01:29:21Unless you have a significant other,

01:29:23I'm going to have to put you on the no-chill list.

01:29:25Well...

01:29:26What if, um...

01:29:30He's with me.

01:29:33Lexi Luthor.

01:29:35You're dating Wade?

01:29:38Let's fall together.

01:29:49You know, a simple yes would have sufficed.

01:29:54Whoa!

01:29:55I'm surprised no one from our past walked in just now.

01:29:58Right?

01:30:01So, listen, I mean, I get it if you want to go

01:30:04hang with the class of 2010 or whatever.

01:30:06No.

01:30:07I haven't seen any of those people in ten years.

01:30:09I don't give a shit about them.

01:30:11I know, right?

01:30:12I feel like everyone here is a rando.

01:30:14I feel like even our squad has been acting like randos lately.

01:30:17Molly's a real estate agent now.

01:30:19Danny's dating Duncan, and I didn't even know.

01:30:22Who the hell knows where Tessa ever is?

01:30:24She's probably smashing Bryce.

01:30:27Wait, what?

01:30:29Did that really happen?

01:30:30You bet your friggin' bottom dollar it happened.

01:30:32Do you solemnly swear you're telling the truth?

01:30:34The whole truth and nothing but it?

01:30:36So help me on God.

01:30:39Saw it with my own two eyes.

01:30:41They let you watch?

01:30:44What? No.

01:30:45I saw it by accident.

01:30:47Oh.

01:30:48Does anybody else know about this?

01:30:50Just you.

01:30:51Jiminy crickets.

01:30:53I gotta tell the squad, right?

01:30:54No.

01:30:55Don't tell the squad.

01:30:57Don't tell the squad what?

01:31:00We're all here.

01:31:01Yeah.

01:31:02What's up?

01:31:03Just, uh, it's nothing.

01:31:05Uh, no, we, uh...

01:31:07Come on.

01:31:08We were just, uh, talking about Tessa smashing Bryce.

01:31:11What?

01:31:12Are you serious?

01:31:13So everyone's snitching on me.

01:31:15I'm truly the young thug of this friend group, I swear.

01:31:17Okay, that is high-key sketch.

01:31:20Okay, hold on.

01:31:21Duncan was dating Danny at the same time as me.

01:31:24This is nowhere near as bad as that.

01:31:26That's an acute observation.

01:31:28She's got a point.

01:31:29Yeah.

01:31:30Listen, guys.

01:31:31These secrets, they're tearing the squad apart.

01:31:36What are we doing?

01:31:38Bryce, you gotta tell Duncan, man.

01:31:44You gotta tell Duncan.

01:31:48Hey, Danny, could I, uh, pull you for a chat real quick?

01:31:50Duncan, I don't want to do this here.

01:31:52Look, I know, okay?

01:31:53Look, I just want to say sorry, all right?

01:31:56I'm really bad at saying no,

01:31:58and I was all fired up on love at the wedding,

01:32:00and you and Tessa kept coming up to me,

01:32:02and you guys were acting super chill,

01:32:03and you guys were looking super hot,

01:32:06and I just handled it terribly.

01:32:09I couldn't say no to both of you,

01:32:11and I just want things to go back to the way they were

01:32:14because you're one of my best friends.

01:32:18I appreciate you saying that.

01:32:20I really do.

01:32:22And I'm high-key heated about the whole thing still,

01:32:24but I guess I'm down to be friends.

01:32:28Yeah?

01:32:29Yeah.

01:32:30Just friends.

01:32:31Just friends.

01:32:32Just friends.

01:32:35Felt so good to squash things with Danny

01:32:37that I couldn't help but think,

01:32:39damn, we handled that adversity pretty well.

01:32:47What are you doing?

01:32:48You know, I was always gonna choose you, girl.

01:32:51Duncan, stop.

01:32:52We're not getting back together.

01:32:54Yeah, yet.

01:32:55Ah-ha.

01:32:57So, like, you're saying you were gonna pick me then?

01:33:01Shit.

01:33:03Probably.

01:33:04I always loved you more.

01:33:06Tessa was just a ting.

01:33:08A what?

01:33:09A ting.

01:33:10Combination.

01:33:12Real bad man.

01:33:14I'm pretty sure you're not allowed to talk like that.

01:33:16God.

01:33:17Look, Tessa, she literally means nothing to me.

01:33:20Duncan.

01:33:22I'm just gonna come out and say this, bro.

01:33:24What's up?

01:33:25I'm smashing Tessa.

01:33:30Consensually.

01:33:31Wait, what?

01:33:33Hey, yo, Johnny's here.

01:33:35What's up, dude?

01:33:36Johnny!

01:33:37Johnny!

01:33:38Wait, wait, wait, wait, whoa, whoa.

01:33:39Hey, bro.

01:33:40What's up?

01:33:41What's up?

01:33:42What's popping?

01:33:43Come eat.

01:33:44Group vibes.

01:33:45Can you repeat what you just said?

01:33:47I'm smashing Tessa, dude.

01:33:48I've been smashing Tessa, your ex-girlfriend.

01:33:51And look, dude, I like her, bro.

01:33:54And we're gonna take it a step further

01:33:56and embark on a super romantic trip

01:33:58driving to San Diego or something.

01:34:01Is that cool with you?

01:34:11Yeah.

01:34:12Yeah?

01:34:13No, yeah.

01:34:14Totally cool.

01:34:15OK, sick.

01:34:16Yeah, that's, hey, I'm super cool.

01:34:17Woo!

01:34:18Check this guy.

01:34:19He's in love.

01:34:20OK, yeah.

01:34:21Stabbing him.

01:34:22Super excited about this.

01:34:23This could work.

01:34:24This is gonna work.

01:34:25This is gonna work.

01:34:26Yeah, all right.

01:34:27Guys, I just want to piggyback off all this positivity

01:34:31and say I'm sorry for getting it twisted these last few weeks.

01:34:35You know, I just got so fixated on showing up

01:34:39to this reunion with the sickest truck

01:34:41and flexing on all these randos we haven't seen

01:34:44in 10-plus years that I lost sight of what matters.

01:34:49And that's this squad.

01:34:51And as long as we're together,

01:34:54I could care less about some stupid truck contest, right?

01:34:57Guys, after serious deliberation,

01:34:59the moment you've all been waiting for,

01:35:01the votes have been counted.

01:35:02Oh, snap, they're announcing the winner!

01:35:06Dan, can you just say you didn't care about this?

01:35:08I know, but, like, you might as well just see who wins, right?

01:35:11Dude, I'm so fired up.

01:35:12Guys, the winner of the See Me High

01:35:1610-Year Reunion Truck Contest

01:35:19is Jeff U.S.!

01:35:23No!

01:35:25No, no, no, no, no!

01:35:28Not in here!

01:35:36Coming in hot with a straight-up monster truck.

01:35:39Bro, when a dude rolls in with a huge truck like that,

01:35:43you know his dick is massive.

01:35:46What up, class?

01:35:47Oh, dude, and Zonder Saunders is not looking pleased.

01:35:52Oh, the dude is taking it super heavy.

01:35:54Jesus Christ.

01:35:55I understand.

01:35:56You see a truck like that with so many babes coming out?

01:35:59Dude, that's got to make you massively insecure

01:36:02and just depressed for days.

01:36:05Well, well, well.

01:36:07It isn't the failed truck thieves themselves.

01:36:10What are you even talking about, bro?

01:36:12Hey, spy kids, laser pointers don't take out cameras, homie.

01:36:16What does that mean?

01:36:17Quick game plan refresh.

01:36:19I'm going to go in, find Jeff U.'s key

01:36:21so we can steal his truck and win the best truck contest.

01:36:24What's your plan?

01:36:25I'm going to go in, find whoever owns that wack-ass PT Cruiser,

01:36:28lie to his face, tell him that I like it,

01:36:30then he moves it and you can steal Jeff U.'s truck

01:36:32without any obstruction.

01:36:33Awesome.

01:36:34Let's do this, Wade Sanders.

01:36:35Let's do it, Zonder Saunders.

01:36:36I don't know if that was...

01:36:37That's deepfake.

01:36:38I don't know if, yeah, it's probably deepfake.

01:36:40He straight-up lied to me.

01:36:42I'm feeling pretty hurt by all your actions right now, dude.

01:36:45What's up, baby?

01:36:46You're good, folks. You're good.

01:36:48Thanks, guys.

01:36:49I liked you guys.

01:36:51I used to look up to you in high school, you know?

01:36:54Now you're just dicks.

01:36:56Hearing Jeff U. call us out for lying to him

01:36:59and telling us that we really hurt his feelings

01:37:01kind of made me realize they didn't really do anything wrong.

01:37:05You know, we just kind of turned them into villains in our heads

01:37:07because we were so jealous of their lifestyle.

01:37:09Now that we're here in front of our whole graduating class,

01:37:14it kind of feels like the only thing we can really do right now

01:37:17is...

01:37:19beat their f***ing ass.

01:37:21Yeah, you know what?

01:37:23I think I've heard just about enough out of you B-listers.

01:37:26Let's squab.

01:37:27So be it.

01:37:28What's up?

01:37:29Hope this mortai ain't too spicy for you.

01:37:31I think we should all throw down.

01:37:32Is this about to come to blows?

01:37:34Were you about to roughhouse?

01:37:35I'm ready to clash.

01:37:36I will straight-up skirmish right now.

01:37:38I'm trying to squab.

01:37:39I want to throw some f***ing hands, dog.

01:37:41That's gonna be a bloodbath.

01:37:44It's the feds!

01:37:45Dude, the feds are here.

01:37:46Run!

01:37:49Surprise, scumbag!

01:37:51Squat car diversion, y'all.

01:37:53Nailed it.

01:37:55You got the right to remain silent.

01:37:56Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law.

01:37:59What are you doing, Jeff?

01:38:00You get this guy off!

01:38:01I'm coming in with massive jurisdiction.

01:38:03What are they even doing here, dude?

01:38:05What are you doing?

01:38:06Come with me.

01:38:08Ow!

01:38:09They hurt.

01:38:10So what is happening?

01:38:11That is completely classified

01:38:12because this is an ongoing investigation.

01:38:14Oh. Okay.

01:38:15But if you insist on knowing,

01:38:17these two are a couple of big-time fraudsters.

01:38:20Yeah.

01:38:21They've been having open houses at Airbnbs

01:38:23for their reality TV show.

01:38:25They've been selling houses that they don't own,

01:38:28and they've been buying cars with investor money.

01:38:32Turns out, triangle group realty is a pyramid scheme.

01:38:37We found the entire plan over at Franco's Tacos.

01:38:40But no, the commissions go up.

01:38:42It's like a funnel.

01:38:43Yeah, like a funnel.

01:38:44To the untrained eye.

01:38:46But upon further investigation...

01:38:50Oh!

01:38:51Oh, my God.

01:38:52Oh, clearing up the story for those of us in the back.

01:38:55Thank you, feds.

01:38:56I'm sure glad you guys cleared that up quick.

01:38:59Let's go. Off to prison.

01:39:00Wait.

01:39:01You know what?

01:39:02Let this be a lesson to all of you.

01:39:05Stay authentic to yourselves, will you?

01:39:08You're out there trying too hard

01:39:10to be cool on your social media.

01:39:13You're prioritizing your facades

01:39:15and your phone screens over family and your squad.

01:39:20I think it's time you all kept it hundo.

01:39:23Huh?

01:39:25Unless, of course, you want to get busted by the feds

01:39:29and exposed in front of all your friends.

01:39:33Like those dicks.

01:39:35Uh-huh, yeah, okay, man.

01:39:37Uh-huh, yeah, okay, boomer.

01:39:43Damn it!

01:39:44God damn it.

01:39:45I hate this f****** generation.

01:39:48Enjoy jail, Jathew.

01:39:51Unlock it.

01:39:52All right, well, I guess now that Jathew's stolen truck

01:39:56has been disqualified, the winner...

01:40:00is Zonder Sonder!

01:40:03Yes!

01:40:07Yes!

01:40:08It was all worth it!

01:40:11It was all worth it!

01:40:25It's only been two weeks since the reunion,

01:40:27but it's crazy how much has happened.

01:40:31Molly's real estate sale got voided,

01:40:33and I had to sell back all the parts to my truck on Craigslist.

01:40:36My truck now looks exactly like it used to,

01:40:39and that's something I'm totally okay with.

01:40:43Molly shifted to a career

01:40:44in selling health and wellness supplements.

01:40:46It's a similar business model to Agora's,

01:40:48but she gets paid in timeshares, so it's chill.

01:40:51The Dunk Surf sweatsuit drop was super successful,

01:40:54and we promised Johnny that if we ever do another season,

01:40:57we'll put him in the intro.

01:40:59Cheers!

01:41:01Duncan and Dani have been dating again,

01:41:03and so have Tessa and Bryce.

01:41:05Duncan says he's cool with it, but I highly doubt that.

01:41:08Hey, Bryce, you want my sloppy seconds, dude?

01:41:11For real?

01:41:15Bryce finally wrote his high school homies

01:41:17their letters of college recommendation.

01:41:20Unfortunately, it was way past the deadline,

01:41:23so they didn't get into any of the schools they wanted.

01:41:26Dani bought the house that Jackie was pretending to live in,

01:41:29and now her, Duncan, Lexi, Wade, Bryce, and Tessa

01:41:33are all moving in together,

01:41:35and I don't see that being at all problematic.

01:41:38Molly and I finally came to terms with the fact

01:41:41that we haven't been happy in this relationship in years

01:41:44and agreed to have unprotected sex one last time

01:41:47and get a divorce.

01:41:49I was starting to get excited

01:41:51about starting a new chapter in my life.

01:41:54But then we found out that she's pregnant

01:41:56with our second child, Hawk 2, the rise of Hawk,

01:42:00and decided to put all that on hold.

01:42:03Unfortunately, Hawk 2 did turn out to be a girl,

01:42:08but I'm not budging on the name.

01:42:10It's just too good.

01:42:12Life is starting to feel a lot like a circle.

01:42:16You know, it's like you get to this point

01:42:18where you realize your old way of life

01:42:21just doesn't work for you anymore.

01:42:23So you say it's time to make changes,

01:42:26but then those changes start to feel super uncomfortable,

01:42:30super uncomfortable and inconvenient.

01:42:33So you say, you know what?

01:42:35Why don't we just put all that on hold,

01:42:37ride this high,

01:42:39and go back to what's familiar?

01:42:42Sometimes when you get to this point,

01:42:45you just got to look around and think to yourself,

01:42:50damn, it's good to be back.

01:42:55Oh, I almost forgot.

01:42:59Hawk straight-up died of old age.

01:43:03Oh, that I had the wings of a hawk.

01:43:07I would fly away, and I would be at rest.

01:43:11It was tough to see him go,

01:43:14but he just couldn't have lived a more full life.

01:43:19I knew the whole story,

01:43:22I knew the whole squad was going to be sawed,

01:43:27but the one who took it the hardest was Bryce.

01:43:35Why is he looking at me like that?

01:43:38He's got a staring problem still?

01:43:41Dude, he's just, he's dead.

01:43:43No, dude.

01:43:44Come on, dude.

01:43:45No, dude.

01:43:46We're not doing it.

01:43:47It's your boy, Sam.

01:43:48It's your boy.

01:43:49Hey, hey, hey.

01:43:50He's faking it.

01:43:51Get him up.

01:43:52Come back!

01:43:53Hawk, come back!

01:43:55And come at me, fool!

01:44:20♪♪

01:44:30♪♪

01:44:40♪♪

01:44:50♪♪

01:45:00♪♪

01:45:10♪♪

01:45:20♪♪

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