• 4 months ago

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Fun
Transcript
00:00Hey guys, Cruel Blind Wave. I'm Eric.
00:02Rick.
00:02I'm Gavin.
00:03Aaron.
00:03And we're here with a new movie reaction. This is The Martian.
00:08Marvin's story.
00:10Oh, I was thinking of more of like, uh...
00:12Christopher Lloyd.
00:12A serious take.
00:13Uh-huh.
00:13Right?
00:14Yes, my favorite Martian.
00:15My favorite Martian, remember that?
00:16I do.
00:17My favorite Martian.
00:17I had Jeff Daniels in it too, I think.
00:18Yeah.
00:19I always think of, uh...
00:21Santa Claus vs. the Martians.
00:23Ooh, classic.
00:24What?
00:25Classic.
00:26I think of Mars Attacks, Mission to Mars, Red Planet.
00:29I love Mars movies.
00:30Um...
00:31Total Recall.
00:32Mm.
00:32Mm-hmm.
00:33Okay, yeah.
00:33But, is it the ultimate Mars movie?
00:36I don't know.
00:37Have you...
00:37Aaron, you, of us, have not seen The Martian.
00:40No.
00:41Yeah.
00:41I haven't.
00:42Right?
00:42I've seen my favorite Martian.
00:43Or read the book, surprisingly.
00:44There's a book?
00:44Yeah.
00:45There is.
00:45I can't believe you didn't read the book.
00:46No, I just got it a little bit ago. It's by Ridley Scott. I love Ridley Scott.
00:49So I watched this. I think I saw it in the theaters. I think I saw it once.
00:53Um, I don't remember much of it, so for me, this will be kind of like a review.
00:56But I've been wanting to re-watch this for a long time, so I'm excited to do it.
00:59I saw this on a DVD, which is a disc that you used to put into things to watch on your TV.
01:05It's a very strange time.
01:06Classic!
01:07Another D-track.
01:09Yeah.
01:10Uh, no.
01:10I mean, the only thing I really know about it is, like, I know the idea of Mars, and I know the main actor.
01:15Okay.
01:15Okay.
01:16Did you know Mars was the god of war?
01:17I have seen this probably three times.
01:20Three times?
01:21Three times.
01:21Okay.
01:22Awesome.
01:22So we'll have some various perspectives of seen and not seen.
01:25But this is also the extended edition that we're watching, specifically.
01:29So, at the very least, that means that I'll be seeing at least ten more, ten minutes.
01:33That'll be enough.
01:34I haven't got to hit this mouse.
01:35It's a new mouse. Do you want to, uh, try out, in terms of strength level?
01:40You don't really know exactly how hard that is.
01:42When you look at it, it don't look hard.
01:43Substantial.
01:44Don't even tempt him. Just hit it at a nice, reasonable rate that's not a Rick rate.
01:49New mouse.
01:50I rate it!
01:52How'd it feel?
01:53It glows when I hit it.
01:54Yeah.
02:00We can get a crossover with the alien universe.
02:03Just because it's Ridley Scott?
02:0520th Century Fox.
02:06Oh, it's not owned by Disney.
02:08Which makes sense.
02:09But this isn't on Disney Plus.
02:12You know who it is?
02:13Maybe.
02:14Oh, I love this one.
02:17You're gonna shoot through axes.
02:19You know what? I've seen this, but I don't have anything I go to immediately after I see it.
02:23You know what I mean?
02:24You haven't seen it on Wishbone?
02:26Wishbone. I never watch Wishbone.
02:28Ah, shit. Damn. I can't remember who that is supposed to be.
02:32That's from the Odyssey.
02:34Yeah, but...
02:35It's Odysseus.
02:36Okay.
02:37He was, like, supposed to shoot through the axe heads to become the ruler or some shit?
02:42No, it's to prove that it's him, so people will leave his wife alone.
02:46That's fucked up.
02:47Yeah, they gotta keep his wife's name.
02:51Out of their fucking mouth?
02:54I love a good sci-fi space movie.
02:56I'm real excited for today.
02:57Crazy they went to Mars to get these shots.
02:59Think we'll see a man on Mars in our lifetime?
03:02Yeah, I hope so.
03:04I'm still waiting for us to go to the moon.
03:08Like our mouths?
03:09It is.
03:10We prefer I use a different adjective to describe Martinez's mouth.
03:14I feel like I should be able to hear it, too.
03:16Oh, my God.
03:17Whoa.
03:18Sounds like an avalanche.
03:19How long before takeoff?
03:21Twelve minutes.
03:22I don't think they have twelve minutes.
03:24It was right there.
03:26Oh, jeez.
03:27Storms on Mars suck.
03:29I'm glad we have water.
03:31There's just rocks flying in the air.
03:35Oh, shoot.
03:36Man, dude.
03:39He may be prone.
03:40We don't want to step over him.
03:41Oh, my gosh.
03:42You can't even see anything.
03:44Especially, there's lights in their faces.
03:46Thirteen's in.
03:47Thirteen's in.
03:48Thirteen's in.
03:49Twelve-something was the tipping point.
03:51You know how slow they always are.
03:53But, damn.
03:54It takes you in there.
03:55It's an escalator.
03:56Yeah, right.
03:57Escaladar.
03:58Yeah, people are like,
03:59Man, you were saying we need this.
04:01No, it's not.
04:03I need you to verbally tell me whether or not to...
04:05Lunch.
04:09Like us at the end of...
04:11Damn.
04:12What's that game where you're getting scraps?
04:15Olive Company?
04:16Yeah.
04:17So, that's at the end of every...
04:18He's dead.
04:19Leave him.
04:21No, I'm right here.
04:22Don't leave me.
04:23Don't leave me.
04:24Really, Scott does the speech so well.
04:25Yeah.
04:27Hey, I was just talking about him.
04:29Yeah.
04:30From My Favorite Martian.
04:31Yeah.
04:35Game alarm.
04:36It's a snooze.
04:38Let me be dead in peace.
04:39Oh, that would be so terrible.
04:42Oh, that's what the beeping is,
04:43because oxygen level.
04:45Oh!
04:46That's why he was decompressed, huh?
04:48Yeah.
04:49So, you can't take it out.
04:50Oh, shit, man.
04:51No.
04:52The reflections and everything is so well done.
04:55Oh, no, he's attached to that damn satellite dish.
04:57Scott, you got a tool for this?
04:59I do.
05:00A couple.
05:01Just took care of it like me.
05:02He just broke it.
05:03I just got this.
05:06You try that in your helmet, Eric.
05:07Yeah.
05:08Bite it while you're in the water.
05:09I got a minute to survive in decompression.
05:12You have no oxygen left to repressurize your suit.
05:16Well, he wanted to wait out the storm.
05:17I really don't have a whole lot of memory of this movie, honestly.
05:21Scott!
05:23You just yank it out.
05:25And you don't have any, like, imaging or anything like that, probably.
05:28It'd be so difficult to take your suit off.
05:30Yeah, I suppose.
05:31Yeah.
05:32You'd have to destroy your suit even more.
05:37Scott!
05:39Is that, like, a numbing thing?
05:40I think so.
05:41EpiPen?
05:42That's how I deal with my diabetes.
05:45I can eat cake now.
05:47Probably, like, a morphine injector or something.
05:49I mean, I'd die.
05:50I'm like, no, I can't.
05:51I can't.
05:52I wouldn't be.
05:53I'm dead.
05:54I'd be happy on Earth, like I am now.
05:55Ah!
05:56It's so deep!
05:57I didn't know that was in there.
05:58Just could feel it?
05:59Probably could feel it.
06:00I don't know.
06:01He also knows the equipment.
06:03Yeah, I suppose so.
06:06Oh, he's comparing it to?
06:07Okay.
06:08Yeah.
06:09That makes the most sense.
06:10It's incomplete.
06:11It should have had this on it.
06:12It doesn't have this on it.
06:13Staple!
06:14Eww.
06:15Eww.
06:16Eww.
06:17Wow, it's like skin.
06:18So.
06:19Aw.
06:20Just staple it quick!
06:21Quick?
06:22You gotta be precise, though, right?
06:23I'm gonna do, like, 15.
06:25I'm putting no more than I need to in there, okay?
06:27One, that's good enough.
06:28Get a hold of him.
06:30I'm gonna criss-cross it like I darn socks.
06:32Dude, Matt Damon's a bad motherfucker.
06:34He can act.
06:35Like, I believe this.
06:36Surprise!
06:37Surprise!
06:39I have no way to contact NASA for years until a manned mission can reach me.
06:45Four years!
06:46That's a long way away.
06:47Takes a lot of preparation.
06:48Eventually, I'm gonna run out of food.
06:51Dang, man.
06:52The end.
06:53Shortest movie ever.
06:55You know, I've been watching the survival show Alone a lot lately, and this is really
06:58scratching that itch.
07:01Can't get much more alone than on Mars.
07:03Yeah.
07:04Just think, all of humanity, one man.
07:07You know, I should read this book.
07:08I bet you it's real good.
07:11I wouldn't feel bad about going through my crew's private things now.
07:14No.
07:16And he fucking left me.
07:18He doesn't have to do.
07:19No, he didn't.
07:20Ain't got, like, a game day or anything?
07:22There's hacky-sacks there.
07:23I'm saved.
07:24I'd be so happy if they had hacky-sacks.
07:25They bounced.
07:27Yeah, they had to get out of there quick.
07:29She made the right decision.
07:31I mean, he's right that they could've waited out, but she's right that it would've tipped
07:35over.
07:36They could've all died.
07:37You know?
07:38And then they'd all be stuck here.
07:39He's very lucky he's not dead.
07:42Two days later.
07:43In English, they call it sol, not day.
07:45Like, sol, for sun.
07:46Sol's the name of our sun, right?
07:47Yeah.
07:48It's how long Mars takes to go around the sun, not Earth.
07:52Because it's a little different.
07:54Rotate.
07:56Like, go around the sun, right?
07:58Go around the sun's a year.
07:59Rotating's a day, right?
08:01Yeah.
08:02I know what you mean.
08:03Grape juice.
08:04Was it 21 days?
08:05Yeah.
08:06So he's got, like, 10 days left.
08:09Right?
08:10Because they were on here for, on the 18th.
08:12So also, it was 31 days for the whole crew, right?
08:14Yeah.
08:22The hell's that?
08:23Vacuums it up.
08:25Rolls?
08:26Is that what that is?
08:27Potatoes?
08:28Potatoes.
08:29Potato.
08:30I gotta figure out a way to grow three years' worth of food here.
08:33On a planet where nothing grows.
08:36Probably.
08:37I'm the botanist.
08:41God, I love that.
08:43Okay.
08:44Where they flush it all to?
08:45Gotta save that shit.
08:47Gotta save that shit.
08:49Dude, they seal it and toss it in here?
08:51Yeah.
08:52Oh my gosh.
08:53They vacuum pack it all.
08:54You just gonna leave your shit on Mars?
08:56Don't want it.
08:57Oh, it labels it, too?
08:59Well.
09:00Now you know whose shit it is.
09:01I'd rather use my own shit, I think.
09:03That's part of the science, too, right?
09:04Check their poop when they get back?
09:06Yeah.
09:07See if it affects your digestive system or anything.
09:09You know, are we not even gonna go back to Earth or anything?
09:11I mean, I guess they have no idea.
09:12So, they're just gonna be like, doo-doo-doo.
09:14They ain't called to Earth, like.
09:16Probably have his funeral before the other guys get back.
09:18I thought we'd go and, like, see, like, oh, here's, you know, the people finding out
09:22or realizing or some shit, you know?
09:25Staple came out.
09:26Uh.
09:27It was in 50.
09:28Now what's he doing?
09:30Oh.
09:32Making, like, a greenie house kind of thing?
09:35What kind of dirt is it?
09:37What makes it not have...
09:39Got a lot of iron in it.
09:41Very iron oxide rich.
09:43It's also...
09:45Okay.
09:46It's like gravy cheese, I think, right?
09:48Yeah.
09:49Doesn't have any...
09:50It's a little yellow, so I was worried.
09:51Doesn't have any microbes or anything like that in it.
09:54Got no earthworms.
09:56Yeah.
09:57You need earthworms?
09:58Yes.
09:59Earthworms help.
10:00They're very important.
10:04That's just...
10:06Deer shit.
10:07Nice garden.
10:08Eric, you can always do it.
10:09You're not on Mars.
10:10My dad's garden this year is the best it's ever been.
10:13And I did not say that lightly.
10:15It's crazy.
10:18How much water do you need?
10:19What are you going to do about water?
10:21Well, luckily he's a botanist.
10:23I don't think that works.
10:24You just got to be your pee.
10:26Aaron, are you a botanist?
10:28I don't know if botanists know how to make water.
10:30The only problem is water.
10:33Everything they sent us up here with is flame retardant,
10:35with the notable exception of Martinez's personal items.
10:41By the way, I'm figuring you're going to be fine with this,
10:43given my present situation.
10:45Talking to Martinez or Jesus?
10:49Anyone who will listen.
10:50Interesting point.
10:51It's like they don't want anything to catch fire,
10:52so nothing burns.
10:54If this place catches on fire, there is nothing he can do.
11:00Oh, shit!
11:03I love that so much.
11:05That's how immediate it is.
11:07He's still smoking.
11:18This is so Dr. Stone coated.
11:20Yep.
11:21I'm going to make a ramen.
11:22I like this.
11:23Check out our Dr. Stone reactions.
11:25It's nice and humid in there.
11:27Oh, that's cool.
11:28So cool.
11:30So they had no way to monitor them or anything,
11:32with them being on Mars?
11:34Well, they had the lander,
11:35and that's where they communicated from and everything.
11:39Wait.
11:41Is there stuff?
11:43Careful where you step.
11:46Little green guy.
11:48Life finds a way.
11:49Cool.
11:52Hey, I know him.
11:53You do.
11:54He's a sorcerer.
11:55Every six could bring his body home.
11:57We don't say that's the purpose of the mission,
11:59but we make it clear that that would be a part of it.
12:01We frame it that way.
12:02More support from Congress,
12:03but not a good way to hear.
12:05Get a lot more money.
12:06Nobody gives a shit.
12:09He's right.
12:10And people die on Everest every year.
12:14Many people.
12:15Nobody stops climbing it.
12:17But Congress doesn't fund those climbs.
12:19But they don't put a satellite over it
12:20and take pictures of the bodies that are over there.
12:25Moons.
12:27Panels of moon.
12:28The lander.
12:31Storms didn't do that.
12:33You've got to be shitting me.
12:35What the hell is he thinking right now?
12:38Potatoes!
12:41Are you going to resign?
12:42No.
12:43I mean, I don't think it's specifically his fault.
12:45You know what I mean?
12:47The next NASA mission is 3,200 kilometers away.
12:52I've got one working rover
12:53designed to go a max distance of 35 kilometers
12:56before the battery has to be recharged at the end.
12:59Really?
13:00In the face of overwhelming odds,
13:01I'm left with only one option.
13:04I'm going to have to science the shit out of this.
13:09Okay.
13:10That's not even an option.
13:11I guess not like an answer,
13:12but I get you.
13:14Figure it out.
13:15I'm left with one option.
13:16Oh, he has his time.
13:17That's literally it.
13:18I'm left with one option.
13:19Figure it out.
13:20Figure it out.
13:21Figure it out.
13:22Dude, if he loses the battery or pops a tire or...
13:26I don't know.
13:27Do they have extra tires?
13:28Do tires have air or anything?
13:30I don't know how tires and rovers work.
13:32Well, there was one rover that was like half buried.
13:35He was pulling stuff out of it, right?
13:36Yeah.
13:37If that happens to this one,
13:38he's going to be in trouble.
13:39If I use the heater,
13:40I will burn through half my battery.
13:43If I do not use my heater,
13:45I will be...
13:47Really fucking cold.
13:48My balls are frozen.
13:51Especially at night, man.
13:52How cold has it got to be then?
13:53Yeah.
13:54If they rupture around humans,
13:55no more humans,
13:56which is why we buried it when we arrived
13:59and planted that flag
14:00so we would never be stupid enough
14:02to accidentally go near it again.
14:04This is officially the least disco song she owns.
14:11This is the least?
14:13The least?
14:14Look at his face.
14:16So his decaying plutonium is keeping him warm?
14:19Yeah.
14:21As long as it doesn't burst.
14:22How good is their mapping system?
14:24Yeah, like there's clutch and shit.
14:26It's not going to just be like...
14:28No.
14:29He drew a course through the mountains and stuff.
14:32Currently, I am paying alimony to two dead B-dex husbands
14:36because somehow gender equality has been me swearing yes.
14:42Are you asking me?
14:43I am.
14:45What's he doing?
14:46He's on Mars.
14:48Yeah, he's not coming home.
15:00No pressure.
15:06Put rocks on the ground like when you're trying to get a plane.
15:09Hey, look!
15:11Right?
15:13What's that?
15:14What does the Triforce mean?
15:16It's the Predator's target symbol.
15:18It's the golden power that was left behind
15:20when the Goddess was ascended from Hyrule.
15:23Oh.
15:24I don't know about this.
15:25Mine's at least 20th Century Fox.
15:27If he could figure out that the satellites are looking at him,
15:29I think that would be a good idea,
15:30but you got to get a bunch of rocks
15:31and hope the sand doesn't get hurt.
15:32Look how big that mountain is.
15:33You're talking like the dentist from Lost.
15:35There's nothing out there except the...
15:38The...
15:39What, he's looking at real pictures that they have?
15:41Yes.
15:44Shut up.
15:45I'm a NASA man.
15:46I know where he's going.
15:48I need to get on an airplane.
15:50What?
15:51He knows where he's going.
15:52No, why does he need to get on an airplane?
15:53To talk to people.
15:55You can just call him.
15:56Why does he got to go somewhere?
15:57He's trying to find a way to contact him, right?
15:59That was his goal?
16:00It's all mute if he can't figure out a way to contact him.
16:04It's like a parachute.
16:05It's like when Hurley found that wire on the beach.
16:07It's like when they dropped...
16:08Like, they flew by and dropped something.
16:10Sometimes they do that stuff, right?
16:13It's like an old rover that could drive.
16:15Good thing it wasn't 3,000 kilometers away.
16:19Whoa.
16:20Okay.
16:21Oh, so it would move and then open up and recharge, then...
16:24I think it just plonked down.
16:25Yeah.
16:26The little rover would go around and do stuff,
16:29but it was just for communication.
16:32I hope he knows more than just botany.
16:34My suit must stink.
16:36You're going to waste water washing it?
16:38It's just you. Nobody cares.
16:40As long as you're healthy.
16:41Yeah.
16:42You don't have to smell like...
16:43He's thankful he's not in the shit again.
16:47Oh.
16:52Camera.
16:54It's Nate.
16:55Is that Nate?
16:56Holy shit.
16:57It is.
16:58There's a bunch of people in this.
16:59I'm Ted Lasso.
17:00Are you receiving it?
17:01Yeah.
17:02I just thought we'd all rather look at a black screen
17:03instead of a vibrant red planet.
17:04Excuse me?
17:05Excuse me?
17:06At Tim's finest comm tech,
17:08we all appreciate his serpent wit.
17:14Are you receiving me?
17:17Yes.
17:19No.
17:20Oh, look at yes, look at no.
17:22Cool.
17:23Look at me, yes.
17:28Stretchy.
17:3050 million miles.
17:32Super nerd.
17:34Who also have copies of Zork 2.
17:37There's a game!
17:42They're going to be looking at these pictures
17:43and be like, what the fuck is going on?
17:45It's like a hit.
17:46This is how Rick communicates with our viewers.
17:48He's starting to speed up.
17:49On what's coming next.
17:50This is pretty cool, though.
17:54Don't miss one.
17:57How's life, is that what it said?
17:58How alive.
17:59How's life?
18:00How's life?
18:02That would have taken so long.
18:03You got to make sure you're there in that 32 minutes.
18:07This is Vincent Kapoor.
18:09Now they can type to each other at least.
18:19How's the crew?
18:20What did they say when they found out I was alive?
18:24Well...
18:28Now you have a different PR situation.
18:31Sorry, you're breaking up.
18:35Go smart.
18:37It'd be so easy.
18:39Broadcast live all over the world.
18:45Yeah?
18:49I don't give a fuck!
18:53Oh, what'd he say?
18:54Oh, what'd he say?
18:56He just said a bunch of things when it was in me.
18:58Let's turn to the Qbert.
18:59What's a felcher?
19:00What are they going to do?
19:01I made the mistake of typing it into Google.
19:05I want to know, I don't know what a felcher is.
19:08Whoa, that's cool.
19:10I did not expect their ship to look like that.
19:12I don't know what I expected it to look like.
19:13Got a little 2001 going on.
19:19Should I look it up?
19:20You can look it up on your own time.
19:22Do you need the bleach?
19:24Perhaps.
19:25I've got to think about this for a bit.
19:28Should I look up definition?
19:31I dived too deep.
19:33I'll just say that.
19:37He's so fast.
19:38We're telling you now because we finally have communication with him.
19:43I love Sean Bean.
19:45I'm always delighted when I see him.
19:46Every time.
19:48I left him behind.
19:49The whole crew could have died.
19:51Yeah, they all could have been trapped there.
19:54She's going to feel that way.
19:55Even still, that one guy was like,
19:56I can't leave until you tell me to push the button.
20:00I understand why she would feel that way.
20:02I've got a room full of people trying to micromanage my crops.
20:06I am the greatest botanist on this planet.
20:17It's like he's on a live stream.
20:19You know what I mean?
20:20Just talking.
20:22It's a way of being.
20:23He's alone, but he's not.
20:30I can't use this, Vincent.
20:31And you know that.
20:32I have a picture of his face.
20:33It makes sense.
20:34912 souls worth of food.
20:36We get there at 868.
20:38That's assuming nothing goes wrong.
20:40Yeah, if anything goes wrong.
20:42For him or them, right?
20:43Like either side.
20:44They're assuming that he...
20:45It's so precarious.
20:47Why do you say that?
20:48Things have been going pretty well for him so far.
20:52Fuck!
20:54Good job, man.
20:55Fucking Jeff Daniels.
20:58I can't remember this.
21:00Oh, no!
21:02I didn't even think about that side was being all blown up.
21:04Yeah.
21:06I fucking sued Breach.
21:07Did a crack in his helmet?
21:08I don't know.
21:09It was a good movie.
21:10Shove some of that up his hole.
21:12Yeah, duct tape, baby.
21:14Do it like The Stables.
21:16Oh, my God.
21:17Damn you, tape.
21:18Fucking...
21:19I hate when I gotta do that shit.
21:20I don't know how to throw it away.
21:22Oxygen level 5%.
21:24Thank you.
21:25Damn.
21:27It was his crop room?
21:29Yep.
21:30Instantly frozen.
21:31Maybe the potatoes would be okay.
21:34They're under the ground.
21:35Not far enough.
21:36Death finds a way, too.
21:39Intrepid.
21:40He's kept his positive attitude the whole time, too.
21:43God!
21:44God!
21:45God!
21:46God!
21:47God!
21:50Sorry we left you behind on Mars,
21:53but we just don't like you.
21:58It's only botany.
22:01It's not real science.
22:08God, I hope that holds.
22:10I'm keeping it pseudo.
22:11Every time I go in that place.
22:14A storm comes through, rips through it.
22:15One sheet of plastic.
22:16How...
22:17How...
22:20It can't be...
22:22One bar.
22:27Looking for leaks?
22:34Oh, God.
22:35At this point, you would just be like,
22:36if it happens, it happens.
22:39I'm gonna be able to sleep.
22:40Can you build like a windshield or something?
22:42Put in front of it?
22:45Oh, damn.
22:46He's in his...
22:47There's so many people watching, man.
22:48I know.
22:57It's fine.
22:59That was an accident.
23:00He stayed in character and they kept the shot.
23:02Awesome.
23:03How often do those inspections reveal a problem?
23:06Well, you just see we don't do the inspections.
23:08Anyone else know a safer way to buy more time?
23:11I mean, they don't give him time, he's dead anyway.
23:12Yeah.
23:13Right?
23:14But they're blowing...
23:15At least $500 million.
23:32He's the king of the world.
23:33Yeah.
23:34I love how he's like,
23:35I'm the best botanist on the planet.
23:39Aw, man.
23:40He was going to town in that ketchup, too.
23:42Yeah.
23:45What was that?
23:46A bird.
23:47UFO.
23:48Did he get his supercomputer time?
23:51What's he do?
23:52He's...
23:53What's his...
23:54It's a calculator.
23:55Calculator.
23:58Alright, that's part of it.
23:59Still gotta get it there.
24:01Oh, no!
24:04Clapped too early.
24:08Aw, man.
24:09Get other countries to help?
24:10Thanks to my Uncle Tommy in China,
24:12we got another chance at this.
24:14In 62 days,
24:15we are now going to attempt to finish it in 28.
24:20Hey, you just did this!
24:21I feel like they cut right before you heard a...
24:23Oh, no.
24:24Yeah.
24:25Project Elrond.
24:28Like Hubbard?
24:29Secret Me?
24:30Of course, they had Sean Bean say it to Secret Me.
24:34Oh, Elrond.
24:35Okay.
24:36Yeah.
24:37Either they're going for the Scientology space...
24:40Hubbard?
24:41Yeah.
24:42That's L.
24:43Period.
24:44Ron.
24:45How do you get the Hermes back to Mars by Sol 561?
24:50The Hermes?
24:51I had him working on this before two months...
24:55He's been working on it for a while.
24:57He had to make sure it would actually work.
25:02Loop it around.
25:05Resupply with the probe.
25:07Oh, we get it up to the Hermes.
25:10Bartley would intercept using the MAV.
25:16We still have a chance to bring five astronauts home safe and sound.
25:19We're not risking their lives.
25:21You've got a dead count.
25:22Let the crew decide what they want to do.
25:25I get it.
25:26Would they be mad they couldn't save their crewmate?
25:29Tell you I'll like it when I touch the cam cam.
25:32What?
25:36Martinez, I'm still not sure what it is that you do.
25:40I don't know why we brought you here.
25:42I did.
25:46That's cool.
25:47It's like curves and stuff.
25:51It'll be over 900 days of space.
25:54That's more than enough space for one life, so...
25:58Yes.
26:01I don't care to ever come back.
26:03But they still need to get the...
26:05They need to get the...
26:06The payload and everything has to go right.
26:08So they need NASA to send that up?
26:10Well, if they do the maneuver, NASA has to because they can't do the other option.
26:13Yes.
26:14They'll force their hand.
26:17How are you going to do that?
26:20Hey, why don't you drill holes in the roof of your rover and hit it as hard as you can with a rock?
26:26Rude.
26:29What?
26:32Hit it really hard with a rock.
26:38Shit.
26:39That's exactly what happened in the test.
26:42Do you have a big balloon on the top of your rover?
26:47He has such a big family there.
26:50So they're sending them supplies for them to have.
26:52To pick them up.
26:53To extend the journey.
26:54Yep.
26:55And for the journey back.
26:56Because they don't have to slow down, they can just slingshot, pick it up.
27:00Just speeding up.
27:01I mean, most of the things that make the launches hard is getting out of Earth's gravity, right?
27:06If you don't have David Bowie in your space movie, you did something wrong.
27:11I don't like those noises.
27:13Good job.
27:15Something finally went right.
27:16I did one of those at the end.
27:18And that's them speeding up.
27:19Yep.
27:20Or having sped up.
27:21Well, the camera is following them.
27:23Otherwise, they're going thousands of miles an hour.
27:26It's hard to measure how fast that's really going.
27:28Seven months later.
27:29They gave up on souls, huh?
27:31Seven months.
27:32Seven months.
27:35Soul 461.
27:37Oh.
27:38Looking kind of skinny.
27:39Yeah, remember how muscular he looked when he was pulling that thing out?
27:43Yep.
27:45Living on potatoes.
27:48What's the deal with that thing?
27:49Just what's it running?
27:50It's company.
27:51Well, who's a good boy?
27:52It's like a puppy.
27:55That means I'm going to be taking a craft over in international waters.
27:59I'm a pirate.
28:00Mark Watney.
28:02Space pirate.
28:04That might be his last one.
28:07His last log.
28:08Yep.
28:09Geez.
28:11Aw.
28:13Hell yeah.
28:14It's an extreme desert bus.
28:16I wonder if he still has any communication now or not.
28:21You know what I mean?
28:22Not moving.
28:23I know he has a little thing in there, but did he take the Pathfinder thing with him?
28:27He probably did.
28:28Can he reset that up?
28:29I'm the first person to be alone on an entire planet.
28:32It's crazy to think about.
28:34Lays the solar panels, waits 13 hours for them to recharge, and sleeps somewhere in there, and then starts again.
28:42Drive through the night, charge them any day?
28:44He asked us to call him Captain Blondebeard.
28:48Well, technically Mars would be under maritime.
28:50Yeah, no, I know.
28:51He explained it to us.
28:56Well, that's cool.
28:57That's cool.
28:58So many great shots.
28:59I've never had a manned ship controlled remotely before.
29:02I'm excited about the opportunities that that affords.
29:08You want a remote-controlled ascent with no back-up cars?
29:12There's only one.
29:13Geez.
29:17We need to remove the nozzle lock, the windows, and hull panel 19.
29:21Oh my gosh.
29:23We're going to have him cover it with...
29:25Plastic.
29:26Fucking plastic again?
29:28Half-canvas, yeah.
29:29It's like MacGyver's face.
29:31You want to send him into space under a tarp?
29:34Yes.
29:35Straight-faced, yes.
29:39We got a damn inflatable thing.
29:43Castaway in space.
29:45Instead of talking to a ball, he talks to a camera.
29:52Gotta leave his poop somewhere.
29:54He left a note.
29:56Sorry.
29:58That's what he was doing?
29:59Just burying his poop under a rock and leaving a note?
30:02For who?
30:03You're supposed to take everything back.
30:05You know you're good camping.
30:06He's like, I'm sorry.
30:07We're losing the windshield, but take your poop.
30:10There's tons of shit sitting back at the hab, okay?
30:13Not anymore.
30:14Scraped it all out.
30:15You have to go faster than any man in the history of space travel.
30:19Because you're launching me in a convertible.
30:22Because I like the way fastest man in the history of space travel sounds.
30:26I do like the way it sounds.
30:29You don't have enough firsts, Mark.
30:31I'm not going to tell them that.
30:34I'm not going to tell them that.
30:36Oh, it's right there?
30:37If all that's going on, I think I would enjoy not being in control.
30:41Like, all that.
30:42I just want to sit there and do this.
30:43Yeah.
30:44You know?
30:45Wait and replay Star Wars in my head until I'm on that show.
30:49Physically, mentally, he's got to be a wreck.
30:52I have to take this damn thing apart.
30:53It's the most impressive thing I think about him is that he's so positive.
30:57That's the only reason he's alive.
31:01Explosive bolts are so cool.
31:03Just chuck it out the window.
31:08Oh, that looks heavy.
31:11It said it's 500 kilos.
31:12Yeah.
31:14I'd just be worried about damaging the other part of the ship, but...
31:19How do they expect this one to stay as long since the last one was going to trip over in a storm?
31:24But they're like, yeah, this one was sent early and it'll be fine for months.
31:27It was an unrested storm, right?
31:29It was rated for something that was...
31:30I guess they weren't expecting it to be that bad.
31:32Yeah.
31:33Also, this one might have more mountains around it, so it might be more protected.
31:38I don't know.
31:39And also, if the MAV tips over, the supplies are still in it.
31:44Yeah, but they need that to get off the planet, right?
31:46Do they?
31:47Yeah.
31:48It was supposed to be for the next crew to get off.
31:54Damn.
31:59Hey, every time he's like, alright, hope nothing goes wrong.
32:01They have to wait so long.
32:03They tell us the plan every time.
32:06Think we'll ever eat a potato again?
32:08After this?
32:10It's the last meal.
32:12The whole launch is 12 minutes, so...
32:15They're on their own.
32:19Shed any weight.
32:22No longer a pirate.
32:25Oh, boy.
32:26Just gotta sit there and let it happen.
32:27You can't even see anything.
32:28I'm trying to sleep.
32:29You're just in it.
32:30Please!
32:31You probably don't want to see anything.
32:32I don't know.
32:33He's gotta survive 12 weeks.
32:34If I can be dead, I want to at least see whatever's gonna be my last thing around.
32:39How you doing down there?
32:40I'm good.
32:41Thanks for coming back for me.
32:43Hearing another person's voice and...
32:45Yeah.
32:46Remote command.
32:47Go.
32:48Recovery.
32:49Go.
32:50Apparently him crying here isn't in the script.
32:52He just started doing it.
32:53Yeah?
32:54Ridley Scott was amazed.
33:04To the heavens!
33:05Get your ass off Mars.
33:07Yeah.
33:09Oh, my God.
33:13The fastest man in the history of space travel.
33:15Start playing the Flash theme.
33:17Oh, please hold.
33:19You just gotta let it happen.
33:20The parachute came off, so there's drag now.
33:24There he goes.
33:25There he goes.
33:26Catch him.
33:27Fuel reserve's depleted.
33:28Yeah.
33:29He's as high as he's gonna get now.
33:30Intercept velocity will be 11 meters per second.
33:33I can make that work.
33:34Oh, man.
33:3510 was the train.
33:36Yeah.
33:37It brings the range to zero, but the intercept velocity will be 42 meters per second.
33:42Oh, holy shit.
33:44That was just spinning in space.
33:46That would be so terrifying.
33:48You wouldn't feel it, but you'd see it.
33:52Which way's up?
33:53Well, you would feel the inertia.
33:55You wouldn't feel the gravity, right?
33:58I get to fly around like Iron Man.
34:02There it is.
34:03Setting up an explosive device in a spacecraft is a terrible, terrible idea.
34:08Hang on.
34:09You guys making a bomb without me?
34:13What if you fall out?
34:14I know.
34:15What if he jumps towards the ship?
34:16He's had so much shit.
34:17Would it slow him down at all?
34:18Yeah.
34:19I want all the memorials back home to be about me.
34:23Just me.
34:27Don't tell anyone I did that.
34:30I can't see.
34:33Oh, don't miss.
34:34No.
34:35Oh, don't miss.
34:36Oh, Bucky.
34:38There's a bomb coming.
34:40Damn, that looks fun.
34:41Where is she going now?
34:44Oh, my God.
34:45What if you just miss?
34:46That's my fear.
34:47Going through and you just miss one and you just...
34:50Well, I think he has the...
34:53Oh, she's going out.
34:54I think he has a maneuver thing on it.
34:57The air pack thing.
34:58I think that's what that pack has on the back.
35:00Yeah, but sometimes shit just breaks.
35:02I get that.
35:08Bye, Jim.
35:11Clip yourself on.
35:12Hey, we see it?
35:13We see the ship now?
35:14Mm-hmm.
35:18At the end of your rope.
35:20I got this.
35:21He's going to jump.
35:22Oh, he's going to Iron Man it?
35:24Oh, shit.
35:25Oh, my God.
35:26You got to control this shit.
35:27Iron Man uses two of them for a reason.
35:29Stability.
35:30Make a fist.
35:31Squeeze the seal.
35:33You're going to have to jump out of that hole.
35:37Damn.
35:38Oh, my God.
35:41Damn.
35:42Oh, my gosh.
35:43Close your fist sometimes.
35:45It's like trying to catch a balloon.
35:51Shit.
35:54Can you grab the tether?
35:55Okay, good.
35:57But he only has one hand.
35:58See, I keep the other one fucking close.
36:00Oh, no.
36:02Yeah.
36:03Oh, no.
36:05You're going to get all tied up.
36:07That's good, though.
36:08I don't know.
36:09He's back.
36:10He's got it.
36:11Yeah, he's got it right.
36:12I'd be doing...
36:13I would be...
36:14I would be wrapping around the arms like fucking crazy.
36:19All right.
36:20Now we got to slingshot around the bars again, though, right?
36:22Get back home.
36:23Way to go, Iron Man.
36:25There's so many Marvel actors in this.
36:27I know.
36:29We got him.
36:33He blew up most of the ship, though, but...
36:35Oh, touch.
36:37It must feel so good.
36:39Yeah, but the ribs don't feel good.
36:41Yeah.
36:46Sir.
36:50That's that guy who lived for over a year on Mars, man.
36:52That'd be crazy.
36:54You know?
36:55That's Iron Man.
36:56Yeah, right?
36:57Fuck yeah, Iron Man.
36:58Captain Blondebeard.
36:59That space pirate.
37:00The Mars...
37:01The Martian.
37:02They won.
37:03Question.
37:08Oh, they let him back.
37:10Martian's going back?
37:12Oh, this is so great for credits.
37:14Yeah.
37:15Yeah.
37:16They got together.
37:18Don't tell anybody I did that.
37:21That huge family.
37:23Woo.
37:25What a movie.
37:26It is.
37:27What a movie.
37:28I wish real life could have, like...
37:29I'd watch it again.
37:30All the countries working together to try to just go to space instead of it being, like...
37:34That's what the International Space Station is.
37:35Yeah.
37:36Right?
37:37It is.
37:38Yeah, but I feel like we just gotta stop there.
37:39You know?
37:40Like...
37:41Well, there's...
37:42There's a lot of work and money involved in going further.
37:44The governments have the money.
37:46You gotta convince the government that it's a good idea.
37:48Spend that on war.
37:49Yeah.
37:50I guess, yeah.
37:51We can fight for this land or we can go find others.
37:53Find other worlds, you know?
37:55Yeah.
37:56That's too hard.
37:57I want yours.
37:58But...
37:59It's Dr. Stone, the movie.
38:00Yeah.
38:01Yeah.
38:02It's with Castaway.
38:03I mean, it's...
38:04Yeah, it's Castaway on Mars is what it really is, I feel like.
38:06I guess...
38:07Matt Damon did a great job, like...
38:09He did.
38:10Yeah, he really did.
38:11Like, he has, like, a good personality about it.
38:13Where, like, I get that he's upset, sad, frustrated, scared.
38:18Yeah.
38:19But there's also the comedy elements that he's tossing in.
38:21Yeah.
38:22Like, you gotta kinda keep it light-hearted a little bit to survive all alone on your own, right?
38:25Yeah.
38:26Like, that'd be really hard to do.
38:27Yeah, like, the down moments hit so much harder.
38:30Yeah.
38:31If he's so up the rest of the time.
38:32Yeah.
38:33Yeah.
38:34I love, like, him talking to the camera.
38:35Yeah, that's probably...
38:36I mean, that was his Wilson, right?
38:37Yeah.
38:38That's what I said during the thing.
38:39Yeah.
38:40Instead of having Wilson on an island, like, he's got this stuff.
38:43I'm gonna do logs.
38:44Yeah.
38:45I'm gonna talk to something, because...
38:46Yeah.
38:47I gotta talk to something.
38:48I gotta make a mission to go get those.
38:49Yeah, right?
38:50Keep all that stuff.
38:51Mm-hmm.
38:52Someday, in that universe, like, they'll make that a museum in the future.
38:57Yeah.
38:58Yeah.
38:59Yeah, on Mars.
39:00Yeah.
39:01Here's where it was.
39:02There'll be, like, a stop along the way from one site to another.
39:03It's like, this is where he shit.
39:04Sorry.
39:05There'll be a plaque.
39:06Yeah.
39:07You know, like a roadside stop thing.
39:08Yeah.
39:09The first guy that lived on Mars.
39:10Visually, too, I thought it was really good.
39:11Oh, yeah.
39:12Yeah.
39:13There's some shots that just look so real that I'm like, that has to be CG, or, like,
39:14you know, you do some set stuff, or whatever.
39:15They definitely saw him.
39:16Yeah.
39:17But, like, there's definitely elements where I'm just like, how did they do this part?
39:18It looks so good.
39:19Yeah.
39:20Yeah.
39:21Even Scott does isolation in space so well.
39:22Mm-hmm.
39:23Like, the only other person I maybe would have liked was John Carpenter, but then he's
39:24not making it home.
39:25Mm.
39:26Yeah.
39:27Right.
39:28It's true.
39:29There's something on Mars that gets him.
39:30It's a shit monster or something.
39:31Yeah.
39:32There was definitely a triumph of the human spirit in this movie that...
39:33Yeah.
39:34Yeah.
39:35Yeah.
39:36Yeah.
39:37Yeah.
39:38Yeah.
39:39Yeah.
39:40Yeah.
39:41Yeah.
39:42Yeah.
39:43Yeah.
39:44Yeah.
39:45Yeah.
39:46Yeah.
39:47Yeah.
39:48Yeah.
39:49Yeah.
39:50Yeah.
39:51Yeah.
39:52Yeah.
39:53Yeah.
39:54Yeah.
39:55Yeah.
39:56Yeah.
39:57Yeah.
39:58Yeah.
39:59Yeah.
40:00Yeah.
40:01Yeah.
40:02Yeah.
40:03Yeah.
40:04Yeah.
40:05Yeah.
40:06Yeah.
40:07Yeah.
40:08Yeah.
40:09Yeah.
40:10Yeah.
40:11Yeah.
40:12Yeah.
40:13Yeah.
40:14Yeah.
40:15Yeah.
40:16Yeah.
40:17Yeah.
40:18Yeah.
40:19Yeah.
40:20Yeah.
40:21Yeah.
40:22Yeah.
40:23Yeah.
40:24Yeah.
40:25Yeah.
40:26Yeah.
40:27Yeah.
40:28Yeah.
40:29Yeah.
40:30Yeah.
40:31Yeah.
40:32Yeah.
40:33Yeah.
40:34Yeah.
40:35Yeah.
40:36Yeah.
40:37Yeah.
40:38Yeah.
40:39Yeah.
40:40Yeah.
40:41Yeah.
40:42Yeah.
40:43Yeah.
40:44Yeah.
40:45Yeah.
40:46Yeah.
40:47Yeah.
40:48Yeah.
40:49Yeah.
40:50Yeah.
40:51Yeah.
40:52Yeah.
40:53Yeah.
40:54Yeah.
40:55Yeah.
40:56Yeah.
40:57Yeah.
40:58Yeah.
40:59Yeah.
41:00Yeah.
41:01Yeah.
41:02Yeah.
41:03Yeah.
41:04Yeah.
41:05Yeah.
41:06Yeah.
41:07Yeah.
41:08Yeah.
41:09Yeah.
41:10Yeah.
41:11Yeah.
41:12Yeah.
41:13Yeah.
41:14Yeah.
41:15Yeah.
41:16Yeah.
41:17Yeah.
41:18Yeah.
41:19Yeah.
41:20Yeah.
41:21Yeah.
41:22Yeah.
41:23Yeah.
41:24Yeah.
41:25Yeah.
41:26Yeah.
41:27Yeah.
41:28Yeah.
41:29Yeah.
41:30Yeah.
41:31Yeah.
41:32Yeah.
41:33Yeah.
41:34Yeah.
41:35Yeah.
41:36Yeah.
41:37Yeah.
41:38Yeah.
41:39Yeah.
41:40Yeah.
41:41Yeah.
41:42Yeah.
41:43Yeah.
41:44Yeah.
41:45Yeah.
41:46Yeah.
41:47Yeah.
41:48Yeah.
41:49Yeah.
41:50Yeah.
41:51Yeah.
41:52Yeah.
41:53Yeah.
41:54Yeah.
41:55Yeah.
41:56Yeah.
41:57Yeah.
41:58Yeah.
41:59Yeah.
42:00Yeah.
42:01Yeah.
42:02Yeah.
42:03Yeah.
42:04Yeah.
42:05Yeah.
42:06Yeah.
42:07Yeah.
42:08Yeah.
42:09Yeah.
42:10Yeah.
42:11Yeah.
42:12Yeah.
42:13Yeah.
42:14Yeah.
42:15Yeah.
42:16Yeah.
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42:18Yeah.
42:19Yeah.
42:20Yeah.
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42:22Yeah.
42:23Yeah.
42:24Yeah.
42:25Yeah.
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42:27Yeah.
42:28Yeah.
42:29Yeah.
42:30Yeah.
42:31Yeah.
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42:33Yeah.
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42:35Yeah.
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42:37Yeah.
42:38Yeah.
42:39Yeah.
42:40Yeah.
42:41Yeah.
42:42Yeah.
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42:44Yeah.
42:45Yeah.
42:46Yeah.
42:47Yeah.
42:48Yeah.
42:49Yeah.
42:50Yeah.
42:51Yeah.
42:52Yeah.
42:53Yeah.
42:54Yeah.
42:55Yeah.
42:56Yeah.
42:57Yeah.
42:58Yeah.
42:59Yeah.
43:00Yeah.
43:01Yeah.
43:02Yeah.
43:03Yeah.
43:04Yeah.
43:05Yeah.
43:06Yeah.
43:07Yeah.
43:08Yeah.
43:09Yeah.
43:10Yeah.
43:11Yeah.
43:12Yeah.
43:13Yeah.
43:14Yeah.
43:15Yeah.
43:16Yeah.
43:17Yeah.
43:18Yeah.
43:19Yeah.
43:20Yeah.
43:21Yeah.
43:22Yeah.
43:23Yeah.
43:24Yeah.
43:25Yeah.
43:26Yeah.
43:27Yeah.
43:28Yeah.
43:29Yeah.
43:30Yeah.
43:31Yeah.
43:32Yeah.
43:33Yeah.
43:34Yeah.
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