Tera Patrick - The Epic Career of a Pornstar
Tera Patrick - The Epic Career of a Pornstar interview / Podcast
Transcript
00:00:00Welcome back, everybody, to another episode of Holly Randall Unfiltered. And if you're
00:00:27listening to this on the audio version on iTunes, SoundCloud, Google Play, Stitcher,
00:00:34etc., I am releasing this on my birthday. So even though right now it's not my birthday,
00:00:40when you listen to this, it's my motherfucking birthday. So happy birthday to me and my birthday
00:00:45present to myself is having the indisputable queen fucking Mrs. Tara Patrick.
00:00:55Yay, thank you. Happy birthday to you.
00:00:59Thank you. Are you going to pop out of the cake now?
00:01:01I would love to, yes. I'll pop out of one of your cups.
00:01:05Okay.
00:01:06And I'll squeeze myself in there. No, happy, happy birthday and thank you.
00:01:08Thank you for having me. I'm really excited.
00:01:10I'm so, okay, first of all, you look fucking amazing. You look, you haven't aged at all.
00:01:16I keep hearing that. I think it's the Asian. But my mom takes full credit for that. You
00:01:21know, my mom, when fans will come up to us, because she lives in Vegas, they'll go, oh,
00:01:25your daughter, she go, oh, she get from me. That's the first thing my mom says. And then
00:01:30she gets excited when she sees fans. But they're like, wow, this is your mom. And yeah, she's
00:01:34a little dragon lady.
00:01:35That's so funny. Yeah, your mom's hilarious.
00:01:38I get from her. So it's Asian, you know?
00:01:40Yeah. I mean, I love my mother, but I hope I don't age like her. She never wore sunscreen
00:01:45or anything like that.
00:01:47Yeah. She's still, she works hard though. I mean, she's out there with the horses and
00:01:51she's always-
00:01:52She's still riding. Well, you know, she lost an eye to a horse, right?
00:01:55Yes.
00:01:56Yeah. So she got kicked in the face on her birthday.
00:01:58And I think her pelvis or her collarbone, I remember.
00:02:01Oh, yeah. Well, she's broken that. That was a different time.
00:02:03Yeah. But she's, I mean, she's in the trenches.
00:02:06Yeah. She's in the hospital like once a year for injuries with fucking horses. And like,
00:02:10you know, she still rides like three horses a day. There's no stopping her. She is a powerhouse.
00:02:15That is for sure. I hope I have like half the energy that she does when I'm her age.
00:02:19I don't have half the energy that she has now.
00:02:20No, I know. I was going to say that.
00:02:22I don't know how she does it. I actually saw her yesterday and she told me to make sure
00:02:26that she sends you her love.
00:02:28Thank you very much. Yeah. She was my first, Suze Randall. So a lot of people always ask
00:02:36like, what was the first thing I did? And I was like, well, I got naked for Suze Randall.
00:02:40And she put me on the cover of, I believe it was Sherry.
00:02:44Yeah.
00:02:45Sherry magazine. What were those magazines back in the day?
00:02:48Sherry.
00:02:49Sherry or Sherry. Actually, I'm not even sure how to-
00:02:50Is it Sherry, Sherry, Patreon?
00:02:51I don't know. I know, right?
00:02:52How do we say everything?
00:02:53I don't know. But yeah. High Society.
00:02:55Club. It was actually, I'm sorry. It was Club. Club International and Club.
00:02:59Genesis.
00:03:00Genesis. Yeah.
00:03:01All of those magazines.
00:03:02Swank.
00:03:03Yeah.
00:03:04I did every one. Suze shot me beautiful, huge, gorgeous. I mean, my penthouse centerfold,
00:03:10my penthouse pet centerfold, which was February of 2000. Suze built a giant photo frame.
00:03:17We still have that.
00:03:18You still have the frame?
00:03:19In the garden. I swear to God, it is still there.
00:03:21Do you get in there every once in a while?
00:03:22I've actually used it to shoot. The last time I used it, I shot Chloe Touré for her
00:03:28Playboy Cyber Girl of the Year shoot. And I totally took inspiration from your shoot.
00:03:33It was incredible. It was incredible.
00:03:35I actually might have that print here. I'm not even joking, because I brought a bunch
00:03:39of framed photos in, and I think that's one of them. So after this podcast, remind me
00:03:44to go look in the other room, because I think it might be here.
00:03:46Everybody, well, someone maybe can win it.
00:03:50Those sets were incredible. And I remember shooting at the ranch, and I remember Suze
00:03:54hiking down, and she's like, oh, there's a bike down here. Get down here. And I'm like,
00:04:00now I've got to hike down there. But we did. We propped this bike up, and we shot with-
00:04:04Was that the yellow racing bike?
00:04:06The motorcycle, yeah. So whoever that was, thank you. We loved your bike. It was awesome.
00:04:11I rode all over it.
00:04:12It was a great set. And then we did, what else did we do? So I know you did the picture
00:04:17frame for that. I know you did the bike shot for that. One of my favorite shoots of you
00:04:21is actually all the prints that I just had you sign for the patron members, the Asian
00:04:26garden.
00:04:27It was like a lotus, like lotus flowers and cherry blossoms.
00:04:30Was that for Plant House?
00:04:32That was for Cherry. So the funny thing is that, that set is really, the three are that
00:04:38one. That one's really recognized, the one in the picture frame. And then everybody loves
00:04:42that deep emerald green latex. That was my pet of the year centerfold. That was February
00:04:49of 2002. And it was the first time I ever wore latex. So yeah, she bought me this beautiful
00:04:55bright green. And I remember she was like, baby powdering me and then oiling it up. Yeah.
00:05:01I mean, those days, when I started, I started shooting in 1999. So 1999, 2000, 2001. I think
00:05:09we started at eight in the morning and we finished at nine, 10 at night. And I'd be
00:05:12at the gas station filling up my car with big old hair, like three pairs of eyelashes
00:05:17that I would not wash my face. I'm like, someone is taking me out. I'm not wasting my makeup.
00:05:23I don't care if I've been in reverse pile driver for 12 hours. I'm going somewhere tonight
00:05:28looking like this. I mean, incredible. Just the production was incredible.
00:05:32And those were the days that we could spend all day just shooting pictures. And nowadays,
00:05:36we were talking about this before the podcast. And if you guys are a member of my Patreon,
00:05:41you'll actually be able to see the little talks that we have before we go live. And we were
00:05:46talking about how the whole glamour photo thing doesn't exist anymore. And we were talking about
00:05:54pointing toes, which is very important to me. And hands. Elegant hands. No golem hands.
00:06:02No back of the hand. Always sideways. You see the gradation of the fingers. Very important
00:06:08stuff. And a lot of people don't focus on that anymore because you don't have the time. And so
00:06:14I shoot these girls and they have no idea how to pose. And I'm nitpicking about all these little
00:06:19things. And they're like, this bitch is crazy. What is she doing? Don't get that electrical
00:06:25outlet in there. Oh my God. Don't get me started about electrical outlets. They make me insane.
00:06:31And my clients don't Photoshop it out and it makes me nuts. Oh my God.
00:06:36Tags. Tags are a big thing for me. I don't want to see the stickers on the bottoms of shoes or
00:06:41in the clothes. I tell girls, also when you come and you arrive and you have that moment to prepare
00:06:48all your stuff and lay it out, just cut the tags out or tuck them in. Use a baby wipe on the bottom
00:06:53of your feet. I think that there's so much discussion about... Of course, we're all on
00:07:01Twitter and social media and I try to just log in and log off now because I see so much nitpicking.
00:07:08But sometimes I feel like it's constructive. That's something I always... These little things
00:07:13I try to advise and tell the girls. This is stuff that Suze took the time to talk to me about before
00:07:18I was shooting. She made sure that my skin didn't look ashy and dry and I was completely prepared.
00:07:24So like you're saying, all these little details add up to just a beautiful product. I mean,
00:07:29this is what you want to be proud of. This is your work, your body of work.
00:07:33It's just frustrating though these days because you don't have much time to shoot
00:07:37pictures. It's all about the video. And nowadays I'm shooting two scenes a day,
00:07:43which at least girl-girl or boy-girl scenes because just financially that's the only way
00:07:47I can make it work. And so I find, honestly, I find myself sometimes rushing through the pictures
00:07:52and letting stuff slide that normally I would never let slide.
00:07:55Beth Dombkowski But you lay awake at night.
00:07:57Suze Schreiber It's frustrating for me,
00:07:59but at some point it's like, you know what I mean? What am I going to do? Either I'm going to
00:08:02end up spending all this extra money to do a shoot for the location and stuff like that,
00:08:10which is going to eat into my bottom line, which is already shrinking as it is.
00:08:13Beth Dombkowski Right.
00:08:14Suze Schreiber And a lot of the audience these days,
00:08:16I feel like, or I don't know, the clients don't notice that stuff anyways. So sometimes I'm like,
00:08:23why do I even try? I don't want to turn this into a whole bitching thing. I feel like I come on and
00:08:27I just complain all the time, but it's just so different, you know?
00:08:31Beth Dombkowski I'm happy to hear your perspective about it
00:08:33though because one thing that I focus on, so I retired in 2008. And when I say retired, I mean,
00:08:38I'm not off on some island drinking Patron, but I completely stopped shooting hardcore.
00:08:47I still get on Twitter every day, come back. I'm like, do what? What am I going to come back to?
00:08:52First of all, it's been 11 years. If I haven't gone back, I just want to tell you guys,
00:08:56thank you, but it's just, I'm not going back. It's been so long. And like we talked about,
00:09:02I kind of just saw, even within my own productions, because I was doing my own
00:09:07productions, I kind of just saw where it was heading, the business was heading. And I just
00:09:11thought, this isn't going to, I want to go out with my best work. I don't want to be shooting
00:09:18scenes, not on the budgets that I can. I just didn't want to not make it look good anymore.
00:09:23When I found myself having to compromise my content, I said, this doesn't make me look good
00:09:27as a performer because I'm also a performer. I don't just own the company, I'm doing the work.
00:09:33And I would never want my fans or anyone to think, she didn't look good or she didn't perform
00:09:39good. So I kind of thought this might just be a good time to step away and transition into something
00:09:44else. And I do so many personal appearances now. I still dance. I love it. I still do a lot of the
00:09:49trade shows. And I actually hear a lot of guys tell me they want the glamor to come back. They
00:09:55do. You do see it with some companies kind of bringing it back, but not most of them.
00:10:02Because it's just so hard financially to make it work because people don't pay for their product
00:10:05anymore. Well, and I think that it's always that circle of conversation where we say,
00:10:11would they? You know what I'm saying? Are guys asking for this? And then part of us wants to
00:10:15say, well, you have to pay for it. I mean, the business model has changed beyond. We were just
00:10:20talking about stepupyourass.com or I don't know. There's like a million different ways for girls
00:10:27to chop up their content and sell it. And I always say, it's okay to have, you know, you
00:10:32should never put all your eggs in one basket, but I see so many girls with 50 eggs in 50 different
00:10:36baskets. And I don't know how they manage. It's crazy. I did a count a couple months ago,
00:10:42and I have like 17 different streams of revenue. And none of them are very significant. I mean,
00:10:48honestly, most of it comes in from me shooting for other people, for other clients like Twisties and
00:10:53Now Naughty America. But a lot of it is just little tiny amounts, but I need all of them.
00:11:00Sure.
00:11:01I need all of them. And then it adds up to something that is somewhat sustainable.
00:11:06Well, and you find one client likes Snapchat, and then you find one likes customs, and then you find
00:11:11one likes fetish. So I do kind of see how the girls, I see how their mind works. And I say
00:11:17girls because when I left in 2008, there was a whole slew of talent I've never met. I see
00:11:23so many girls on Twitter, we follow each other, but I've never met them. I think even when I do
00:11:28the Exotica shows, there's yeah, it's just there's like this huge gap of talent that I don't know.
00:11:34Yeah. Well, and a lot of girls that come in and then they leave immediately,
00:11:37you know, like not a lot of people have longevity.
00:11:40Or stay. Yeah, they stay. I was really excited to, it's funny, I was signing,
00:11:44I've signed a few times next to her, but we'd never actually gotten to meet Adriana Chechik.
00:11:48Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:11:49So we signed next to each other at the last show, and it was cool. We got to say hi,
00:11:53and I like her a lot. I think she's great.
00:11:56She's very cool. She's very dirt. She's very beautiful.
00:11:59Yes.
00:11:59Super dirty.
00:12:00I think she's an incredible performer.
00:12:02Yeah, yeah. She's one of those like, you know, rare girls. It's like,
00:12:05like could get away with maybe not being so hardcore because she's so pretty,
00:12:10but like is and like loves it, like naturally is into it, you know? And I think the audience
00:12:16recognizes when you're faking it and when you're into it, and I think that that's probably why
00:12:20she's been so successful.
00:12:21I completely agree, and that's why I like her. Like she's one of the few,
00:12:24I think, that really stands out.
00:12:26She's authentic in that way, which I think is important because if you're going to do
00:12:29all that crazy shit, you better be into it.
00:12:32That's what makes me, that's what I wonder. I mean, I see so many girls doing like super hard,
00:12:39just super. And part of me, like I'm not a naysayer, but part of me sitting there going,
00:12:43yeah, okay, like you just, you're dying for four cocks in your ass. Like really? I mean,
00:12:48really? I mean, they, they put this image. I get it. I get that we have to create some fluff to put
00:12:52out there on Twitter, but I'll see some girls going, going on my 18th hour of masturbating.
00:12:56I'm like, okay, girl, you know? I mean, it's like.
00:12:59I masturbate like once a month, dude. I'm so like.
00:13:02How can you go 18 hours? And then her Twitter is like, I need help. Go fund me. My dog's dying.
00:13:07And then two hours later, I just had, I just got booked for a 10 guy gangbang. I'm like,
00:13:11this is the most entertaining Twitter like I've ever, but it's, it's, yeah, it's bananas. Like,
00:13:17there's just really so much that, I mean, if you did anal, it was a big deal. I mean,
00:13:23I don't ever remember every movie having to be, every movie having to be anal. I mean,
00:13:27maybe we had one scene. Yeah. In a movie.
00:13:30And now you've got a whole website, you know, like Tushy. I just had Abigail Mack and Caden
00:13:34Cross on, um, talking about Abigail's anal showcase on Tushy. And that whole website is
00:13:40anal. It's all anal. And, you know, obviously it does, it does well because people are into that,
00:13:45but. Well, I think his particular product that was quite stylized. So I think it's probably that
00:13:51might be, I mean, you get so many people that say, you know, oh, you would have never been
00:13:57as popular as you were back then, you know, now, because you didn't do anything. I'm like,
00:14:02I mean, it was a different time for sure. But also I think, I just don't think that this,
00:14:07like we said, it was a gradual shift now because I, where can we go from here?
00:14:13Yeah. I don't know what, I mean,
00:14:15some of the quadruple anal, where do you go from that? Do you do anal backflips? I mean,
00:14:19I don't know where it goes. I mean, where did you go?
00:14:21You know, like who literally does something like that is Prince. Do you know Prince? Prince, um,
00:14:27he does like this crazy, this crazy move where like literally he'll be eating a girl out and
00:14:32he does this like, or like she's on his dick and then he does like this backflip with her.
00:14:35I shake him off and they end up in like another position. It's like, it's so insane.
00:14:41Okay. So we've already done that. So where do we go from there?
00:14:43Exactly. Yeah. But it's crazy. Like it's just,
00:14:46I really sometimes look and I just think, what can you, where does your career go after that?
00:14:51Yeah.
00:14:51You know, I mean, we were no pun intended. We were able to stretch out, you know, some of our,
00:14:56some of our careers. So you didn't do anal right away because then where else, what else would be
00:15:02the allure to have you? And also companies that had you under contract weren't eager to kind of
00:15:07push out, you know, all the extreme stuff out there. I remember Chloe, she was really known
00:15:12for fisting. And I remember thinking that was crazy. So I mean, now it's par for the course.
00:15:21Now it's anal backflip fisting.
00:15:25So what are you doing nowadays? Like in terms of like what you're doing,
00:15:30so you have a, um, you do clips, clips stuff, right? Like tell, tell the fans like where they
00:15:36can find your new content. Like, where are you? Where are you now? Where is she now? Where are
00:15:40they now? So I could just, I only stopped shooting a hardcore boy, girl hardcore,
00:15:45but I still have TerraPatrick.com. I think it's my 16th or 17th birthday. And, um, yeah, I,
00:15:52I still have a lot of my archived content on there, you know, from Suze and I shooting all
00:15:57of my boy, girl content, all of my television stuff. I update it a weekly with like photo
00:16:01sets. So I still shoot, I still get naked, but, um, I kind of just only shoot for myself doing
00:16:07glamor stuff. I do do, I will sell, um, uh, I do every once in a while sell clips, but they're
00:16:13more like fetishy, like smoking or latex, you know, cause that's what I'm into. And of course
00:16:19the glamor. And, uh, you know, funny enough, I started about three years ago, webcamming through
00:16:24my website and I really like it. I always have. I just never had a lot of time to do it full time.
00:16:30So I do a lot of webcam shows on my site and I moved to Italy.
00:16:35Yes, you definitely moved to Italy. So I left LA. How did that whole thing come about? And what
00:16:41made you finally decide to move there? That's a big move.
00:16:45Is that was a huge move. So in 2015, I got an offer, uh, just, you know, I've always loved
00:16:51feature dancing and, uh, I've done a lot. I mean, I've been to 90 countries and I've probably
00:16:56danced in 40 of them. So I've done a lot of feature dance shows. I got an offer to work
00:17:01with a company, uh, for a year in Italy. Uh, they said, come out for a month. We have 20 shows,
00:17:08you know, for you, let's just do like a test run. I went, uh, that year I did my shows in about a
00:17:14month and a half. And it's definitely different going to a country and being a tourist versus
00:17:20actually living there. Right. But when I came back to LA from Italy, I, I was sad. I found that
00:17:27I felt like something was there for me. I wasn't sure, but I thought, you know what? I can always
00:17:32come back here. I invested in some property. My parents are here. I can work from anywhere. I'm
00:17:38just going to go. And I packed two suitcases. I took my daughter who was three at the time.
00:17:43And yeah, I, I think it was about, I mean, of course I went online, I figured out the logistics,
00:17:49like how to get an apartment, you know, it really wasn't that hard. And it was, it was just
00:17:53what was pulling me. It was pulling me to do that. And it wasn't hard to like get a visa,
00:17:59like immigration. No, it took me the whole entire process took about six months. So I came back here
00:18:07to the U S um, my house, both my houses sold within three months. So I was like, this is just
00:18:13the universe telling me that I need to go, you know, everything just happens seamlessly.
00:18:18And so I said, uh, that was the next step, you know, getting over there and getting a permit,
00:18:24a permissa di soggiorno, a permit of stay, getting my daughter enrolled in school. But you know what?
00:18:29I find all of that, that's all stuff I would've had to do here too. So I thought every, because
00:18:33I would just hear, aren't you scared? I'm like, of what? Like, first of all, Italy is such a,
00:18:38it's an incredibly beautiful country. Like, you know, it's a very, I mean, every country,
00:18:43everyone has their, their problems or their, their things, but you kind of just have to see
00:18:48like, what do you want out of life and what are you willing to let go of? For me, it was just a
00:18:54new adventure. Like I had a very comfortable, beautiful life here, but I wasn't growing.
00:18:59I'm like, I'm just going to stay here in LA and kind of, I mean, I was enjoying it. Yeah. And so
00:19:06I thought I'd rather just grow and do something new. I've always wanted to work as a chemist.
00:19:10I saw really, I saw a lot of different opportunities for me over there. So it's been
00:19:16three years. I got married. It wasn't hard. It wasn't hard to find it. No, I'm just kidding.
00:19:21I met my husband a few months after I arrived and yeah, I mean, it's just been an incredible
00:19:27journey and I love it. And I mean, I get the best of both worlds. I still come back here and I work
00:19:31a bit and I see my family, but my soul just, it's very happy over there. Our day-to-day life over
00:19:39there is very happy. Yeah. I love Italy. One of the best vacations I ever took was I went with my
00:19:44dad to Italy. Where did you go? We went to Rome. We went to Naples and we went to Capri. Oh, Capri.
00:19:52Oh my God. Yeah. Oh my God. Like the most beautiful place in the world. Yeah. Capri's
00:19:57incredible. It had this heady scent about it, you know, like just the air smelled good and it was,
00:20:03everything was white and clean and oh my God, it was just incredible. So you're going to come
00:20:06visit me soon. I'm going to see you. You can stay with me. You have, yeah, absolutely. I'll
00:20:12take you around. I was going to go, I was telling you before, I was going to go for my birthday
00:20:16and then it just didn't work out like financially. I just couldn't support it because I had all
00:20:20these, you know, it was a rough year for me. Well, if you get yourself there, I'll smooth
00:20:24you out. We'll go to Capri and I'll take you to Tuscany too. So my cousin actually runs a villa
00:20:30in Tuscany. So I was able, I was going to stay there for free, but it was like even just getting
00:20:34the flights over there and stuff, it was rough. But I'm, you know, next year I think we'll try to
00:20:38go. I've got you. Yeah. And then I don't know if you'll come back. You might not come back.
00:20:41I know. I know. Honestly, like I loved Italy, the food, the people were so friendly. Just the
00:20:49history. And you know, my dad is like a Greek and Roman scholar. So going with him, especially to
00:20:53Rome was like having my own personal tour guide. He just knew everything. It was just like, it was
00:20:57a really magical trip. Like I have a very like soft spot in my heart for Italy. And you know,
00:21:03I love, you know, those stupid movies like Under the Tuscan Sun and like Eat, Pray, Love, you know,
00:21:08and they talk about how, I don't know, life is different there and it kind of slows down. And
00:21:13you know, I don't know, in LA we're so like caught up in our image and how much money we make and
00:21:17what car we drive. And don't get me wrong, I love LA and I grew up here and my family's here. And
00:21:23I mean, honestly, like I kind of can't imagine living somewhere else, but I don't know. There's
00:21:28something very like romantic about Italy. Well, and you learn a lot about yourself too,
00:21:33you know, I still keep in touch with a lot of, I mean, I'll always stay in the industry somehow.
00:21:38You know, I've always said like, I will never denounce the business. I love my work. I love
00:21:42my fans. I am grateful that it has been almost 12 years that I've not shot, but I am still able to
00:21:49go to Exotica. I'm still able to go to the shows and my fans still come to see me and talk to me.
00:21:55I mean, I wrote Sinner Takes All, my first memoir in 2009 when I left the industry. So
00:22:01January of this year, 2019, I wrote a follow-up called Happy Ending. And that talks about my
00:22:06life now. And I just... Now is that out yet? It's going to come out for Christmas. So it'll
00:22:11pre-sell at Christmas. You'll get a very first copy. Yeah, you can read it. And it just, you
00:22:16know, our lives take a lot of different paths. And that's something about the adult industry that I,
00:22:21I know everyone finds fascinating is people think you can do nothing else. They kind of just think
00:22:26that you're stuck. And people have always asked me what, you know, but what you do, you know,
00:22:30you're so stigmatized. I'm like, no, I'm not. I mean, that's other people's perception,
00:22:35but I've been able to move to another continent. I have an entirely different life. I'm still
00:22:40working here in doing what makes me comfortable and happy. But my day-to-day life, like you said,
00:22:45has slowed down a lot. Also, it was my choice to, you know, sometimes you just, I just wanted
00:22:52to grow differently. I wanted to learn another language. I wanted to just see another part of
00:22:55the world. I love LA. I love America. But I've, I don't need to be more famous. I don't need to do
00:23:02more of the same. I don't need to shoot anymore. I don't need to do more of the same stuff. Let me
00:23:07go see what else is out there. And I think that's just how we grow as people. We become grateful
00:23:12and we become appreciative. And it just, what you do every day has such a huge impact on your
00:23:18psyche. So, and now that I'm raising a daughter, that's really important to me is that, you know,
00:23:24I don't mess her up. But, you know.
00:23:28So, being in Italy, do you find that like either are you less, are people less judgmental of what
00:23:35you do? Do people recognize you less than like when you come here? Like, is just the way that
00:23:40you're, like the people there, are you treated differently there than you are here?
00:23:43You know, the short answer would be no. And I say this because my first experience going abroad,
00:23:49so in the year 2000, we used to have the, when they had the Cannes Film Festival,
00:23:53we used to have the Hot Door award show.
00:23:55I remember that.
00:23:56Right? So, I know I'm taking you way back.
00:23:58I know.
00:23:58So, I won, that was my first award, Best New American Starlet. And I can remember like being
00:24:05on the beach with all the other European porn stars like Rocco Soffredi and Dolly Golden,
00:24:09you know. But over there, we were treated like normal film stars because it ran at the same time
00:24:14as the Cannes Film Festival. So, I can remember having like a police escort. I can remember it
00:24:18was just a different time. You know, Julia Ann, a lot of us had gone over there and we used to
00:24:23love it because like you said, I don't know if the stigma changes, you know, of course, what we do
00:24:30is still not mainstream completely. I mean, and as it shouldn't be, it should only be for consenting
00:24:35adults and for people who can appropriately watch it or consume it. But I do find that they are a
00:24:42little bit more relaxed. And I do find that like when I come here and I say relaxed because I've
00:24:47had guys come up to me when I'm eating, and they're just like really demanding about an
00:24:53autograph and a picture. And I'm like, it's kind of all in how you approach someone. I don't know
00:24:57if they'd approach Jessica Alba that way. I don't know if just having her jerked off to me makes me
00:25:03a little more, there's no barrier there. Yeah, I feel like from what I've learned, heard from
00:25:08other porn stars, like Lisa Ann's talked about this, about how because you're, you know, a porn
00:25:13star, people think they know you in like an intimate way that they don't know other people,
00:25:17and they feel like they have more of a right to touch you, to, you know, that kind of thing.
00:25:22Say things to you. Right. Like in front of like your family, you know what I mean?
00:25:26Even just the poor waiter that's standing there. So, there was a waiter once. And listen,
00:25:31I will always oblige. I try not to draw too attention to myself. I don't like to stand up
00:25:35in an airport and take pictures with people. Like I kind of just, I'm a little more, not ashamed or
00:25:40anything, but I just don't like to attract a ton of attention. But of course, I'll always oblige,
00:25:44but not when I'm eating or not when. So, I remember having a guy once, and there was a
00:25:49waiter there getting ready to like pour me water or something. And he said, so when I was 10, I
00:25:54went, whoops, like that. And then the waiter almost dropped like his, you know, canister of
00:26:00water because, and then the guy's showing, I'm like, we're going to say 18. We're just going to
00:26:04say 18. Like, I get that you were young and they think it's an age thing. This is like, I really
00:26:08just want to tell the guys out there, that's not what it is. I just don't need a visual of you that,
00:26:14you know what I mean? Like, I don't know why they think it's flattering to tell you that,
00:26:18but yeah, like you said, I just feel like sometimes there's no filter or there's no,
00:26:24they forget their manners or they forget that, you know, we appreciate you consuming our product.
00:26:30I appreciate the great opportunities I've had in the great life that you give us by, you know,
00:26:35promoting us and helping us and supporting us. But there's a time and a place to kind of be
00:26:41a fan. And in Europe, I find they respect that a lot more. I think it's just that,
00:26:45you know, when I go out with my husband and we're eating dinner, people really just don't bother
00:26:50you. They'll come up to us after maybe when we're walking away. In the clubs that I feature at,
00:26:55I find the guys are just more polite. Maybe it's just a cultural thing. I think Italians
00:26:59are very proud people. I think a lot of, they're also very respectful. Appearance is very important
00:27:05to them. They don't want to say anything wrong. They don't want to do anything wrong. My husband
00:27:09actually had no clue who I was. No clue. So he Googled me after seeing me for the first time.
00:27:17Heather Cooan How did you meet him?
00:27:18Jessica Flanigan He's a defense attorney. He's
00:27:20a criminal defense attorney. Heather Cooan
00:27:22My boyfriend works in law too. It's very sexy. Jessica Flanigan
00:27:25Well, you're just drawn to their intelligence, you know, how intelligent they are. And also
00:27:29how different, like we're kind of like the forbidden. Heather Cooan
00:27:32I love that it's, yeah, I love being with someone who has nothing to do with my industry,
00:27:37whatsoever. We have completely different careers. And I love the fact too, that he actually doesn't
00:27:41really give a shit what I do. He cares in the sense that he wants me to be happy, and he wants
00:27:46to be fulfilled, and he wants me to be successful. But he doesn't actually care that I do porn.
00:27:51Jessica Flanigan Right. Well, and I think too,
00:27:53from a business perspective too, he's there as a good sounding board for me. Obviously,
00:27:57I don't need to hash out all, I'm sure you do, all the details with him. But he always wants
00:28:01to make sure that I'm safe, that I'm not getting screwed over, that the people around me, I'm
00:28:06working with good ethical people. You know, it's funny too, because I think that sometimes in social
00:28:11circles, when I've brought him, I don't know, I brought him to Exotica. And Lisa Ann was hilarious.
00:28:18She's like, okay, Alberto, I'm preparing you. It's like a porno garage sale.
00:28:21Heather Cooan It's so true.
00:28:23Jessica Flanigan So he was like, what is garage sale? Like,
00:28:26you know, he's trying to first grasp what's a garage sale. Like the porno part didn't even phase
00:28:31him. He was like, what's a garage sale? Like, are we, does this show in a garage? Like, because
00:28:34I'm sure it was literal to him. English is not his first language. So we talk in English,
00:28:39we communicate in English, which now his English is perfect. But that night he was going to serve
00:28:45a client. And so that client said, hey, there's like an American porn star here featuring, you
00:28:50should go talk to her because you speak English. And he did, he came over and he said, ciao.
00:28:55Heather Cooan So he went to the club to go serve a client?
00:28:58Jessica Flanigan He went to the club, yes. And that client
00:28:59actually ended up actually being one of the best men at our wedding, you know, because he was like,
00:29:03I did something good, you know. But he came over to me and he said, ciao. And I was like, ciao,
00:29:11but he meant hi, and I meant bye. Because ciao is like hello and goodbye. Because I was like,
00:29:15no, no, no, beautiful Italian man, you are not working this American girl. I've been here three
00:29:19months. And I'm focused. I'm just going to focus on my, you know, love has a way of,
00:29:26I think also in this business too, I've been at the top of my career, you know, many times and,
00:29:31you know, some guy will creep in and I'm just like, no, no, no, no, no. Like, it's very difficult
00:29:36to balance a relationship. Heather Cooan
00:29:38Because you don't know like, who wants to be with you because like, you're Tara Patrick,
00:29:44or who wants to be with you because of who you are, as opposed to like, what you are. Like,
00:29:48I can imagine that's difficult to discern. Jessica Flanigan
00:29:50Well, that and the benefits, let's face it. I mean, even friendships, you know,
00:29:54you'll have people hang out with you because they think they're going to hook up with Tori Black,
00:29:57or they're going to, you know, they're going to go to an award show with you or, oh, Holly,
00:30:01can I come on set? No, this is a professional set. This is my job.
00:30:04Heather Cooan
00:30:04My boyfriends are not allowed to come on set. Jessica Flanigan
00:30:06You know, I mean, and what do they think is going to happen anyway? Like in mid scene,
00:30:09I'm going to turn around and go, you're the guy I need to fuck. Has that porno been made?
00:30:16Heather Cooan
00:30:17We all have orgies afterwards. Everybody in the crew after a 15 hour day,
00:30:22we're exhausted. And then we just all jump into bed together.
00:30:25Jessica Flanigan
00:30:26Yeah. So you're like, what do you think is going to happen? But that's just kind of like we talked
00:30:30about going back to earlier about, you know, there's a stigma, right? But then there's also
00:30:33the reverse where people are just too excited to be associated with you or too excited to know you.
00:30:38So it's, I think that in all facets of the industry, it's kind of a lot of times like,
00:30:43what can you do for me? It's a business of opportunity.
00:30:46Heather Cooan
00:30:46Yes. Yeah. So you met him. He said, ciao. And you said, ciao. Bye, ciao.
00:30:52Jessica Flanigan
00:30:53But he found the next three clubs I was featuring at and he sent roses. And then he sent wine.
00:31:00Heather Cooan
00:31:00What? Okay. Were you a little bit like weird about that at first?
00:31:03Jessica Flanigan
00:31:03I was, yeah.
00:31:03Heather Cooan
00:31:04Because if a guy like was sending me roses, I didn't know. I'd be like, this guy is such a creep.
00:31:08Jessica Flanigan
00:31:08Well, and he wrote that on the card. He wrote the nice stalker. So I was like, oh, here we go.
00:31:13But you know, what I found that was different, and I think that this is just a life lesson that
00:31:19we eventually start to learn, is that it's all about action, not intentions. So when a man proves
00:31:27to you with his actions that he's interested in you, I'm not talking about little texts like,
00:31:31hey, I might show up at two in the morning. When he physically comes to pick you up,
00:31:36brings you flowers, picks up the phone and calls you, this is a clear indication
00:31:40that someone is serious about getting to know you. And he was. I mean, he took me to
00:31:46you know, beautiful dinners. And you know, it was just, he knew I was new.
00:31:51Heather Cooan
00:31:51He romanced you.
00:31:52Jessica Flanigan
00:31:52Well, and he romanced me, but he also knew that I'm coming from an entirely different continent,
00:31:57culture. I'm here in another country. I don't know anyone. He took the time to make me comfortable.
00:32:03That was like, first and foremost, like, I'm sure he had like pile driver in his head.
00:32:06Heather Cooan
00:32:07Yeah.
00:32:07Jessica Flanigan
00:32:07But you know, he's a man. And also, you know, there was interest there,
00:32:11but he took the time to make me comfortable and understand that, you know, he wanted,
00:32:17he was proud of his country, and he was proud of his, you know, city, and he really wanted
00:32:20me to be comfortable. And he was just very, very good about following through with that.
00:32:28So it took about, took almost four months. And then finally, I said, okay, I'm ready. And yeah,
00:32:33our first, I think our first like big date out of town was we went to Massive Attack.
00:32:37Heather Cooan
00:32:37We both love Massive Attack in Milan.
00:32:39Jessica Flanigan
00:32:40Massive Attack is amazing.
00:32:41Heather Cooan
00:32:41I love them. Well, and back to, you know, what we talked about with Italy,
00:32:44like we would go to Tuscany. I mean, I'm sorry, like, I will say like, I mean,
00:32:49he took me to Cortina, he took me to the Dolomites. I mean, it was like,
00:32:52there's no place you could go in Italy and not fall in love.
00:32:56Jessica Flanigan
00:32:56Yeah, it's an incredible country.
00:32:57Heather Cooan
00:32:58I mean, I feel like if he would have met me over here, like I'm trying to think of
00:33:01the equivalent of where I could have taken him to.
00:33:03Jessica Flanigan
00:33:03Santa Barbara.
00:33:04Heather Cooan
00:33:04Yeah.
00:33:05Jessica Flanigan
00:33:05Which, by the way, I love.
00:33:06Heather Cooan
00:33:06Yeah, exactly.
00:33:07Jessica Flanigan
00:33:07But it's not, it's not, you know, it's not Capri.
00:33:11Heather Cooan
00:33:11It's not Capri.
00:33:12Jessica Flanigan
00:33:13Catalina Island is not Capri.
00:33:14Heather Cooan
00:33:15Well, yeah, exactly. No, he likes it here. He's been to the US with me about six,
00:33:20seven times now. He's met my family. He loves it. You know, love just, it is, he's,
00:33:26he has told me, you know, that was kind of my first, that was the big conversation we had that
00:33:32we had to get out of the way was I said to him, you know, I, he wasn't ashamed to walk down the
00:33:36street with me. I mean, he would hear it. You know, he's a lawyer. He's a very high profile
00:33:40lawyer in his city. He's a defense attorney. And he, you know, he had a few other lawyers,
00:33:45and he had a few people say, you know, what are you doing with her? Like, she's a porn star. And
00:33:49he was like, he didn't even address it because he said, these are not people, anyone who loves you
00:33:55and respects you, everyone else, like even my close friends, you know, I mean, you accept,
00:34:03you, you, you get to know someone before you judge them on their character. You know, what
00:34:07the character that they present to you and who they are, that's what you have to go by,
00:34:11not by their title or...
00:34:13Right, right. Yeah. I think it takes, and I think it takes a special kind of man to be able to,
00:34:18you know, not let that intimidate them, not let them, you know, like kind of be worried about
00:34:23what other people are thinking.
00:34:25Well, if they defend the worst of the worst, like he, I mean, he, he laughed because he was like,
00:34:29I mean, he was like, she's not, what has she done wrong? Like, he's like, I absolve criminals
00:34:35from, she's done nothing criminal. Like, you know what I mean? Like, and I...
00:34:39A lot of people are happy.
00:34:40Exactly, exactly. And no, he said that, you know, I, I think he's incredibly brave. You know,
00:34:48Italy is also a very religious country. There's that side too. So, no, he, I think though,
00:34:54I think there's a part of him too, that just really gets a kick out of it. That so many people
00:34:58are like, whoa, about it. So, you know.
00:35:02That's awesome.
00:35:03So, let's revert, let's rewind a little bit because people are always curious about
00:35:08this question. How did you get into the industry? Like, how did that whole thing start?
00:35:14How do you end up on the dark side? No, I'm just kidding.
00:35:17It's from cookies. You have cookies come to the dark side.
00:35:21It probably was. Yuri, she probably did have cookies. Your mom. No, you know, I
00:35:27I, gosh, going back to, so it was 1999. And I had done some bondage photography. I had done,
00:35:37I think the Gong Show. Like, I had just kind of done like a few cute little...
00:35:40Was it Ken Marcus that you had done bondage for? Or was it somebody else?
00:35:44That was a few years later. So, I think the first photographer, Ed Fox.
00:35:48Oh, okay. That's a bunch from the past.
00:35:51Yeah, right? I'm going to take you way back.
00:35:55How far do you want to go?
00:35:57Eric Kroll, I believe. Yeah. So, I had worked with some early photographers just doing
00:36:03some bondage. And then I went to Jim South.
00:36:07Because were you doing fashion modeling first?
00:36:09I was. That was when I was about 15, 16. So, I started in fashion.
00:36:14So, you'd started modeling. And then when you were 18, you're like,
00:36:17I'm going to maybe do some nudes, like kick it up a notch.
00:36:19Yeah, kick it up a notch. And then I'll never forget, I was being Polaroided.
00:36:26At Jim South. Oh, man. So, for those of you who don't know, Jim South was the OG agent. He also
00:36:32repped Jenna Jameson. He was the only game in town. It's crazy how many different agents there
00:36:38are now. But back in the day, he was literally the only guy. And you would go in and he would
00:36:45take Polaroids of girls, because before digital, and you would go into the office and you would
00:36:50just go through these books, like these photo albums of Polaroids of these girls and decide
00:36:55who you wanted to book. And it's so funny. He's actually still in business.
00:37:00Really?
00:37:00Yeah, but he doesn't-
00:37:01And his son too, because I think I remember his son was also-
00:37:04Yeah, I don't know if his son's running things now.
00:37:06He might have been who Polaroided me. I don't remember.
00:37:09Yeah. But he definitely doesn't pull the caliber of girls that he used to. We'll put it that way.
00:37:15But he was such a... So, it's funny. He was good to me. He was very good to me.
00:37:21He was a nice guy. Jim South, I have no problems with that guy. He was always
00:37:25a good dude.
00:37:26I want to say he was sitting with T.T. Boy in his office and they were discussing something.
00:37:32No, I remember. I'm sorry. So, yeah, it was Junior. He was there as well, but there was
00:37:37another girl working the desk who she took me and she walked me past everyone, I remember,
00:37:42because there were people sitting on couches, there were people drinking. I mean, it was like
00:37:45a little bit... I mean, like you said, he was the only one in town. So, everyone was kind of meeting
00:37:49there and picking up their checks probably. So, she takes me into this room and she says,
00:37:54okay, look, I'm just going to take you to Suze Randall. And I was like, okay, who's that?
00:38:01I'm thinking, what am I getting into? And she says, because I think I'm pretty sure she could
00:38:06get you into Penthouse. And so, I thought, Penthouse, okay, well... And I remembered now
00:38:12seeing Suze Randall. I remember always seeing her name on all these penthouses and beautiful
00:38:19magazines and hustlers. And so, I thought that might be good for me to start doing nude
00:38:24magazines. I hadn't even heard of adult movies yet. So, when I walk out, that was my first path
00:38:30crossing was T.T. Boy. And they asked me if I was ready to shoot. And then I just remember her
00:38:36going, no, no, no, no, no. She took me away from the wolves at that moment. So, yeah, T.T. was like,
00:38:42well, wait a minute. I was going to book her first. And she was like, no, no, no, no, Suze
00:38:45is going to book her first. So, I just remember, break her in easy. Ironically, I worked with him.
00:38:51I had three great scenes with him. We had great chemistry. People always ask me,
00:38:56because I shot Gonzo first. But yeah, I remember. And then I went to get, I think it was over in
00:39:02Santa Monica. I went to her studio and she did Polaroids with me.
00:39:06Yes, that was back in the day. We had that place.
00:39:08Yeah. And I did my first shoot for her. It was Club International. And then the following week
00:39:15was Penthouse. And yeah, I think I spent about a year and a half just shooting for Suze.
00:39:19Yeah.
00:39:20We did some incredible work together. And like I said, looking back, I mean,
00:39:24there is nothing that I'm not happy with. I love all of the work I did. I never did anything that
00:39:31I didn't like to do. I wasn't really into extreme acts. I knew I wasn't going to go that way.
00:39:37I would get a call, hey, Tara, it's Jim. Someone wants to book you on, are you free Tuesday?
00:39:43I mean, I think I shot once a week. It was just really easy back then. I could just shoot one
00:39:47scene. And he was like, just make sure you got your test with you. It was just really easy. But
00:39:54he really was helpful to me. I remember we sat one afternoon, we had lunch. He would go to the
00:39:59same place for lunch. And I was kind of already a step ahead. I had a very good friend back then
00:40:05who mentored me and she got me into like banking and finance and trademarking. And that kind of
00:40:10saved me in the beginning of my career because early on, I made sure that I had all of that
00:40:17straight.
00:40:17Yeah, you were fiscally responsible because I mean, you see so many girls that come in and
00:40:21they go from making nothing to making all of a sudden all this money. And they think that the
00:40:25money is just going to keep coming in. And then they just blow it on purses and shoes and cars
00:40:31they can't afford. And then it dries up and then they're like, oh, shit, now what do I do?
00:40:35Exactly.
00:40:36Because they haven't honed any other life skills either.
00:40:39Well, that's the thing that I always try to say. I mean, people always want you to give them
00:40:44advice. And I've always said you're making more money in your life right now than your parents
00:40:51or any... You would have to have a degree. I mean, you'd have to have a law degree, you'd have to
00:40:56have some kind of medical degree, I mean, to make this kind of money. And they can't wrap their head
00:41:01around that because porn has just kind of become this portal for easy money. And then girls think,
00:41:09well, I might not want to shoot next week, so I'm going to get into Fyndom and then I'm going to
00:41:13make a ton of money from that. And it's like, well, now there's 10,000 other girls that are
00:41:16in Fyndom this week. So they don't understand why they're just not able to make all this money.
00:41:23And like you said, I mean, I've always said having a $2,000 handbag, this is something,
00:41:29in my opinion, that I would buy once every five years. And that was after I'd socked away
00:41:35what I wanted to financially sock away so I could feel comfortable. They buy this stuff on every
00:41:40trip. I mean, I'm just like, I don't know how... I mean, I've gone on set and seen thousands of
00:41:47dollars just in purses and shoes and I thought, and you Ubered here? It's just bizarre to me,
00:41:52or they don't even have a place to live. So I just think that it's not even the adult industry,
00:41:57athletes, rappers, I mean, all facets of the entertainment industry, it's very hard to...
00:42:05A lot of managers don't teach that type of responsibility early on. It's like money,
00:42:10money, money, money. And I think it just kind of blows your head up and they don't really...
00:42:14Or you have the dreaded entourage. I see people with like 20, they can't function without a
00:42:19makeup artist or an assistant. And I'm like, this is not an assistant because they're not
00:42:24helping you. They're spending your money. Yeah. They're like, yeah, running and getting
00:42:28you Starbucks is not something that you necessarily need to have 24-7. Yeah.
00:42:33And there may be 19, 22. So I'm like, when you're 24, and then they think you're old at like 30.
00:42:41So I mean, yeah, I would really like to see... I always tell the girls, I mean,
00:42:46I get so many on DM too. I'm like, I'm happy to steer you in the right way. I would just to
00:42:51financially be more responsible or even like medical, like a lot of them are afraid to get
00:42:58medical insurance or buying a house or these are just life things you need to know. I'm like,
00:43:04Sister T will help you out. I mean, that's kind of where trying to wrap it up here is just like I
00:43:11said, these are things that I try to push on and impress on the new girls now, because I just want
00:43:17to see the girls doing better. Yeah. Because if you're careful about what you do with your money
00:43:23and how you manage it, you can set yourself up and do well. I mean, look at you. You're
00:43:27fucking living the dream in Italy. You're working for yourself and you're setting your own schedule
00:43:33and you're raising your daughter. Did having a kid really change your perspective on everything
00:43:40and how you wanted to live your life? Absolutely. Absolutely. But like I said,
00:43:45we were comfortable here and her father and I actually, funny enough, we had met when he molded
00:43:49my placebo flashlight. I remember because I was there and I remember when we were flying back
00:43:57and we were all on Southwest and you were in the boarding group before us.
00:44:01I was so proud. I was that cocky. I had A1. So I was super cocky. I was A1. I was making sure
00:44:07everyone knew that I was A1 and I was in front and you had your glasses on. You guys were like C54.
00:44:12I was so exhausted and I remember, so Tony and I were in line and we're going down the aisle and
00:44:21you're sitting there and there's an open seat next to you and you're like, hey, Holly, come sit next
00:44:24to me. I'm like, I'm going to go to the back and steal a whole row and lay down and go to sleep
00:44:28because I was so tired. I'm like, Tony, you should sit with Tara. You guys hang out and then he sat
00:44:32with you. So I sat on the end and the middle was free. So I moved in the middle so he could have
00:44:37the aisle and he was like, oh, cool. Thanks. Puts his bag there and falls asleep. I said, oh,
00:44:44no, I did not A1 board to sit in the middle to have you fall asleep on me, but no, he was really
00:44:50nice about it and yeah, we have now a daughter that's six, Sophia, and yeah, he was super
00:44:56supportive, like go to Italy and so rewinding and then going forward. So Suze started my career.
00:45:03I started with her and then you were like in the second half because everyone should know that you
00:45:08can keep a secret. You knew I was pregnant and I came to you and I said, okay, I'm going to shoot
00:45:14a ton of content. I'm going to shoot up my website and I want you to do it because I knew that you
00:45:18would know. We had to do certain angles and wear certain wardrobe. Oh, I remember that. I'm like,
00:45:23fuck, I got it. You were the only one that knew. Yeah. And you're not the first person who I've
00:45:27had to hide pregnant before, by the way. So we know that you can keep a secret.
00:45:33Yeah. Nobody knew you were the only one that knew. And then, yeah, so that was, and that's all,
00:45:41that phase of really, that phase of shooting really cemented for me that I would never go back.
00:45:48After my daughter being born, I was never going to go back and shoot hardcore, but a lot of the
00:45:52work that we created together made me realize I can still exist, shooting glamour and shooting
00:45:59nudity and shooting soft core. And that's kind of always been my style anyway. I've always tried
00:46:04to just kind of keep it, I loved shooting gonzo early on and that was fun for me, but I just never
00:46:10found myself being really extreme. And back to what you said, they know, fans know, they can tell,
00:46:15they know when you're uncomfortable or they know when you're doing something that you don't want
00:46:19to do. So yeah. God, it's so crazy. We've known each other for such a long time. It's so amazing.
00:46:27And you were my best friend, Charmaine Starr. We're still very close. You shot her as well.
00:46:33She was the first girl that I shot that wasn't somebody that I knew. So when I first started
00:46:40shooting for my mom, I know when I first started shooting for my mom, when I first started working
00:46:45for my parents, I was only doing office admin stuff and then I was assisting her. And then
00:46:50when my very first shoot that I did was Amy Sweet, who's still one of my best friends,
00:46:55actually. She lives close to me and yeah, she's still one of my best friends.
00:46:59So we were pet of the year the same year. She was in my year as well, Amy Sweet.
00:47:02Yeah. So I shot her and then Alexis Winston, who was also a friend, like the three of us
00:47:09were good friends. And so I shot, because my parents were running their websites at the time.
00:47:13So I first started shooting them and that was kind of easy for me because they were girls that I knew,
00:47:18we were friends, because I was totally nervous. I could not give any direction. I couldn't ask you
00:47:24to undress. I couldn't ask you to spread your legs. None of that. I was just terrified. I was
00:47:29just like, click, click, click, click. And they knew what they were doing.
00:47:33Well, they were patient. They knew how to get in the poses.
00:47:35Yeah, exactly. And like I said, we were friends, so it was comfortable. So finally,
00:47:39when I think my mom thought I was ready, because she really kind of hand fed me certain things as
00:47:45I progressed and became better. She'd let me move up a step or shoot on location. You know what I
00:47:51mean? But she was very controlled over what I did in the beginning. And so she was like,
00:47:55there's this great model, Charmaine Starr, and club wants a centerfold on her, and I'm going to
00:48:01let you shoot her. And I was terrified because I didn't know her. It was my first time shooting
00:48:06somebody that I didn't know. You don't know her personality, what she's going to be like.
00:48:10Yeah. And I didn't have the confidence yet. And she was awesome, obviously, and she was easy.
00:48:18My mom hand fed me models that knew what they were doing.
00:48:21Sure.
00:48:21So that I didn't really have to give them direction.
00:48:23You didn't get the flat footed.
00:48:27You might have thrown down the camera.
00:48:28Exactly.
00:48:28Not have gone this far.
00:48:29Exactly. They knew what they were doing. And she gave me her assistance and her stylist. So
00:48:34basically, it was super easy for me in the beginning. And then as I learned, now I can
00:48:39shoot. I shoot brand new girls who don't know what they're doing all the time. And that's kind of
00:48:43my specialty, is working with new girls.
00:48:46Which is such an honor, I think, for them too. And I know,
00:48:52I love shooting with a woman. For me, like I said, you'll know when the corner of my
00:48:56eyelash is popping off. There's just certain details. I feel like that. And there's a huge
00:49:01comfort level aside from you. I work with Lisa Boyle a lot.
00:49:04She's awesome. She shot me, actually.
00:49:06I know. I saw that. And it's kind of like we said, there's just, I think, some kind of
00:49:12commodity that's there. There's just some type of feeling. And I think having been a model,
00:49:17that's why even when I was trying to direct girls too, I know those positions suck. And I know some
00:49:22of them hurt. And like you said, there's just a certain way that you can have...
00:49:29Yeah. I think that you can empathize with them. And also too, as a woman, you know
00:49:33how uncomfortable it can be to expose yourself to a bunch of strangers.
00:49:36Yeah. Things you have to hide. Like you said, you just knew the angles to...
00:49:41Yeah. And as a woman, I get it that you've got a part of your body that maybe you're a little bit
00:49:48nervous about.
00:49:48You don't like the folds or...
00:49:49Yeah, exactly. So just because I have the same thing, I can kind of relate. And I don't know,
00:49:55sometimes I feel like men, all they see is the vagina and the boobs, and they forget all the
00:50:00rest of it.
00:50:01Right. They just have, they know what they need to shoot. And so they get that first. It's like
00:50:05meat and potatoes. So they kind of, yeah.
00:50:08But it's like, and then on some levels, sometimes guys are better at certain things than I am.
00:50:13I remember I shot for browsers a couple of times, but I just, I wasn't the right fit for them. I
00:50:19wasn't getting those super wide angle shots of making the ass look huge and the vagina looking
00:50:24big. You know what I mean? They have a very specific thing that they want, and I just wasn't
00:50:28getting what they needed. So it wasn't the right fit. So I'm not right for every brand.
00:50:33Sure, sure.
00:50:34Like I work for, I'm good for like twisties. Obviously when I was working for Playboy,
00:50:39I was good for Playboy.
00:50:40The glamour.
00:50:41Yeah. But like, if you try to get me to shoot hardcore gonzo, it's just not,
00:50:46I'm just not, it's not going to work.
00:50:47It's not me. Yeah, no. And that's something like going, when I look at content now,
00:50:53it's funny because like I said, I direct a lot of my stuff towards like glamour or certain
00:50:56fetishy things I like. I'm not understanding. I remember when fake boobs were so taboo.
00:51:02Now it's like, I see butts coming around to the front. I don't understand this. Like I've
00:51:07always said I'm coming, not going. Like I'm like all in the front. Like I can't make it clap.
00:51:13I can't do any of that. My back would probably, it would go out. I just,
00:51:17I probably, not even probably, it would go out. Like if I, I mean, I love Tori Black.
00:51:21She's like an incredible twerker dancer. You know, she probably does the triple anal back
00:51:25flick and flip and then twerks. But I can't do that. And now I see these butts. It's like their
00:51:31butt comes around to the front. It's like the most bizarre thing I've ever seen. I'm not judging
00:51:36and I'm not being hostile. It's just, yeah, it's a very different trend. Like you're saying all
00:51:42these trends that are popping up now. Yeah. It's really interesting. Like big butts were never
00:51:46really a big thing before. And now it's like- No. It was about the boobs.
00:51:49Yeah. And now it's like about the butt. So it's really interesting.
00:51:51They're like, you have boobs. Get the fuck out of here. You know? It's like,
00:51:54you know, can you make those clap? You know? Yeah. It's just crazy.
00:51:58Yeah.
00:51:59The trends, all the different stuff. But you know, it's what I love about the adult industry the most,
00:52:03like I've said, is any type, there's so many beautiful women in this industry from A to Z.
00:52:10I mean, it's been very accepting, you know, of all types of women. Whereas like when you start
00:52:16in fashion or some of like the glamour magazines, I remember Perfect Ten, you know, there were so
00:52:21many magazines they wouldn't take me because it's like, you're too tall, you're too short,
00:52:25you're too, you're not thin enough. Yeah. They like really skinny girls.
00:52:28Yeah. There was just certain. So you felt bad. I mean, it does something to your self-esteem,
00:52:33you know, when you don't look a certain way. And so porn has been
00:52:37really open about, come on in, make a clap, make it rain, make it bounce.
00:52:41Because there's going to be somebody, like whatever you are, they're going to be into that,
00:52:45you know? And especially when the internet came along and really opened up all those channels,
00:52:49and now people could seek out their specific fetishes, you know? And I had Carla Lane on
00:52:55a while ago, and she's great. She's a plus size performer. And she actually, it's funny,
00:53:01she's like almost not fat enough. Like she was saying that, you know, that she's almost like
00:53:06in the middle, like, you know, there's girls who are like bigger than her, who kind of like
00:53:10dominate that market. And, you know, so, but it's like, everybody has something that they're into.
00:53:16And she has her fans who love her for how she looks, love her body size, and she's proud of it.
00:53:21And she like feels sexy and beautiful. And like, I mean, that to me is amazing,
00:53:25you know? And that is something that the mainstream industry hasn't really embraced yet.
00:53:29I feel like porn is really kind of ahead of the mainstream industry in that genre. I mean,
00:53:35you're seeing it change a little bit, but-
00:53:36Beth Dombkowski But it's so small. It's so minute. Like,
00:53:39they'll get a girl that's, oh, wow, 130 instead of 115, right? That's a big stretch.
00:53:44I know what you're saying. And that's something that I've always tried to push. I just performed
00:53:48in Greenville in South Carolina this past weekend. And there were so many couples and so
00:53:53many women in the strip clubs. And it's back to that stigma. Like, you know, people love porn.
00:53:59People, there aren't, people aren't as prude, I think, as, I mean, I've had so many guys say,
00:54:04I don't know if I should be here at Exotica. You know, my boss, what if he's here? I'm like,
00:54:08he's here and you're here. So that guy's probably my bond over that. That means it's okay,
00:54:13because you're both here. So, I mean, it's 2018. Why can't you just be man enough to accept that,
00:54:19you know, you like, you're here to see your favorite actresses? You know, I just think that
00:54:23that's kind of, it's nice. It's nice that there's something for everyone. I really think that.
00:54:29People used to think that porn was just blonde and big boobs and like, it was just kind of one way.
00:54:35And it's not. I mean, there's really every body type, every fetish type, you know, and it's even
00:54:42becoming more, I mean, I feel, I have to like reference the Urban Dictionary to figure out
00:54:47what some of these terms are. I'm like, felching. Okay. Like, you know, I mean, I don't know.
00:54:51There's so much.
00:54:52Wait, what is felching?
00:54:53So I guess it's when you come in the ass and then you put in a straw to sip it out.
00:55:00I know.
00:55:01Well, you know what, you, you know, so funny enough, I didn't know what swirly porn was.
00:55:06I saw that on your Twitter one day and I was like reading your tweets and Googling at the
00:55:10same time and I was like, oh, like that. So you've grossed me out.
00:55:13Yeah. Yeah. I know. Right.
00:55:14But what is this?
00:55:16But for those of you who don't know, swirly porn is when you're fucking a girl from behind
00:55:20over a toilet and then you dunk her head in the toilet and then you flush it.
00:55:23I mean.
00:55:25It's so fucked up.
00:55:26Yeah.
00:55:27It's so fucked up.
00:55:29And you know who was doing some of those was Rocco.
00:55:32Yeah. He is definitely.
00:55:33He got sick. He went kind of hardcore.
00:55:36For a while. Probably still.
00:55:37Yeah.
00:55:38No, he's, I accepted an award on stage about a year ago in Florence and I remember before
00:55:45he gave me my award, Tara, why we no fuck together? And I was like, okay, so do I get
00:55:51to make a speech or do I have to, is that my speech and I have to answer you? Yeah.
00:55:54We never worked together. A lot of fans always asked for that. They said, why didn't she work
00:55:59with Rocco? You know, I mean, there's just, yeah, I would have loved to have, I would have
00:56:05loved to have worked with Tori.
00:56:07Tori Black.
00:56:08She was, I like her a lot and I like Vicky Chase a lot too.
00:56:13Yes. Both like really smart girls.
00:56:16Beautiful. They're incredible performers and I just really love their persona,
00:56:22both of their personalities. I like Missy Martinez a lot too.
00:56:25Oh, she's hilarious.
00:56:26She makes me laugh. You know, she's hot and funny. So I really like her a lot.
00:56:30Yeah. I love Missy. I love Missy's like self-deprecating sense of humor. I had
00:56:33her on the podcast as well and I've also had Tori Black on. I haven't had Vicky
00:56:37Chase on yet, but I'm sure I will. But yeah, it's always really nice and that's what I love
00:56:41about this podcast is I get, I mean, I know you, you know, we've spent so much time together, but
00:56:46it's nice for me to sit down with these girls that, you know, I've spent 10 hours a day on
00:56:49set with them, but I don't really know them.
00:56:51You don't get a chance to talk.
00:56:52Yeah. And like really, it's always, I always walk away really impressed and inspired and,
00:56:58you know, feeling like, wow, these are so much more than what I thought they were,
00:57:03you know, and that's kind of like what I love about this show is like, I really want to show
00:57:07everybody that these girls are not just like porn stars. They're not just sex objects.
00:57:10They're human beings. They have their stories, they have their dreams, they have their fears.
00:57:15And, you know, it's, it's been really, it's been a really incredible journey actually.
00:57:18That we're not one dimensional, you know, it's, it's very interesting. I think that,
00:57:23you know, a lot of, I love still doing the Exotica show, Pornhub Garage,
00:57:28I've been there from the beginning. It has given me an opportunity to not just stay current,
00:57:38you know, because, you know, listen, guys, Google every day, my stuff,
00:57:41meaning my body of content, my work, I mean, TaraPatrick.com, I'll keep it up. I don't know,
00:57:47you know, for a while now, but you know, guys find you, I mean, and they get younger and younger,
00:57:52but my stuff isn't on, my, my stuff isn't like number one on all of the, because it's been a
00:57:57while since I've shot content, but being out in the public and being able to meet my fans and
00:58:01let them see me and then new fans go. So it just keeps perpetuating all of my, all of my stuff.
00:58:06Keeps you relevant.
00:58:07Yeah, exactly. And they get to know you. And even if they talk to you for five minutes,
00:58:11five seconds, making that impression is really important to me because they see who you are
00:58:17behind your DVD, Kate. Well, that's so, like, what are we putting out now behind your,
00:58:22behind the screen, you know, when they Google you, like, they're like, oh, DVDs, you know, well,
00:58:27you know, funny enough, and I was not around in this time. I started in 1999. So, and I didn't
00:58:33even shoot hardcore till 2000. So sometimes I'll get guys that'll go, well, in 19, you know, in the
00:58:3890s, I'm like, that wasn't me, you know, but I had one guy come to a club with some VHS of Asia
00:58:44Carrera. And I was like, okay, like, you know, I'm just gonna cut him a break and, like, give
00:58:50him a signed autograph. But he was like, well, can you sign these? I'm like, first of all, that's not
00:58:53me. And second of all, I will buy you a DVD player. If you buy some of my DVDs, like, you can't bring
00:58:59roll up with VHS in here. That is crazy. I had a guy insist I was Asa Akira. Oh, I mean, bringing
00:59:06me her pictures. That's gotta be so infuriating. You're like, hello, not all Asian people look the
00:59:11same. I mean, yeah. You're not even full Asian. That's what I'm saying. Well, and also, I think
00:59:15there's like a tattoo, a height difference, hair color. You don't look anything like Asa. Thank
00:59:20you. But she was like, oh, really now? Oh, so, you know, I'm like, so now she's gonna go put
00:59:25on a red wig. No, but I mean, I'm like, it's like two heads, one brain. I don't get it. Like,
00:59:31I don't know if they just don't, you know, think, but. So were you saying earlier that you're
00:59:36working as a chemist in Italy now? Yeah, that's what, so I want to go in, so I don't read and
00:59:41are, I can't read and write and speak Italian well enough yet. But I would, that's my ultimate
00:59:47goal. I'd like to work in a pharmacy and I'd like to make, yeah, creams. And so it's funny when you
00:59:52were talking about Aria, like studying bugs, but she still wants to be around wine. I mean, I don't
00:59:57know if I'd ever full blown go into medicine, but I would like to, yeah. I mean, there's,
01:00:03the beauty market's always interested in, interested me and my mom's like, make cream,
01:00:08make me look young again, you know? So yeah, I mean, it's just, it's kind of a transition that
01:00:12I feel like it's been in the process for about three years now. Have you thought about starting
01:00:17like a makeup line or like a, like a skincare line? I mean, skincare, not makeup. You look
01:00:21fucking amazing. Like seriously, you don't have any wrinkles. Like, it's like really unfair.
01:00:26These creams I'm making. Yeah. I'll tell you that coconut and hyaluronic acid are
01:00:33some of the main ingredients. So I can make you something too.
01:00:36Really?
01:00:36Yeah. Yeah. But this is where I want to go. And I think that it's a natural
01:00:41transition for me and I enjoy the work right now. I have a little ways of studying to go.
01:00:48Chemistry is not easy and yeah. So, but yeah, that's definitely the direction that I'm headed.
01:00:54So yeah.
01:00:56I feel like I'm in the right place. Switzerland, Italy, like there's a huge open market for me.
01:01:02It would be a lot more complicated here. So, you know, complicated, just the legalities of it and
01:01:09going back to school. So yeah. And I think that also, that's one thing I have noticed over there
01:01:16too, is that, you know, the way I'm, you know, just food, the different food I'm eating, you know,
01:01:22I mean, I eat a carrot and it tastes like a carrot. I mean, it's just.
01:01:26The food there is incredible. I remember like the tomatoes tasted like candy. That was like
01:01:30the one thing that I remembered. Like everything's so fresh there. Like you can't have a bad meal in
01:01:34Italy.
01:01:35No. And people keep asking me like, how are you not gaining all this weight eating? But I'm like,
01:01:39pasta is not the only thing we eat over there. Like we have so much fresh seafood and fresh
01:01:44fish that comes from the Adriatic.
01:01:45And it doesn't have all those like preservatives in it and all those hormones. And are you doing
01:01:50a lot of walking too?
01:01:51I do. I don't even have a car. Lisa was shocked. She's like, so we're, I'm like, I walk. We have
01:01:56a Vespa, you know, but I walk everywhere. I enjoy walking to my fish market, to the vegetable
01:02:02market, you know, life, the lifestyle over there is just different.
01:02:05You're making me want to move to Italy.
01:02:07All right. I'm moving to Italy. I'm out of here.
01:02:12It was just like, just sounds like such a like idyllic lifestyle. I'm just, sometimes I'm so
01:02:17over sitting on the 405, you know, for fucking five hours trying to get home and just like the
01:02:23insanity of the city.
01:02:24My husband could not believe, Alberto could not believe that. He's funny because when we first,
01:02:29when I first brought him to LA, I said, where do you want to go? Where do you want to stay?
01:02:33And I'm thinking he'll say Beverly Hills or he says Venice beach.
01:02:37I said, are you sure? Like that's a little downtown. And he was like, I love it, baby.
01:02:41I want to go to Venice beach. And so I'm laughing because, you know, now that I'm 30 minutes away
01:02:47from Venice and I live near the real Venice, it's like, instead of San Marco, it's St.
01:02:52Mark's over here.
01:02:53So he was just a little bit curious, I think, to see some of the cultural differences.
01:02:57And when I took him to the Palazzo in Vegas, I was so ashamed.
01:03:01You know, I mean, it's America. It's beautifully done, but obviously it's very different from
01:03:07over there. But he was just, he thought it was really funny. Like he was kind of like,
01:03:10oh, okay, this is your Venice, you know. So now I get it. Now I get the Venetian.
01:03:15Now I get what the lions mean. Now I get what everything is because I'm really over there.
01:03:19But they love, you know, in Italy, they love Americans. They love American culture. I meet
01:03:23so many girls that I dance with in the clubs or that I work with. And they're just like,
01:03:28one day I want to go to Los Angeles. And I'm like, okay, baby.
01:03:31It's funny. We're over here, like dying to get over there.
01:03:33Yeah. And they want to come here. It's always, you know, it's just, it's just,
01:03:38it's different. That's all it is. It's just something very different. I mean,
01:03:41girls over there are like, you know, what's Rodeo Drive like? And it's so cute, you know,
01:03:46because I'm like, well, we might sit in the one I want. I mean, yeah.
01:03:49Literally Rodeo Drive is all tourists.
01:03:52Like it's all tourists.
01:03:55Yeah. Shopping, taking all the, yeah, the pictures. They love all like the little shops,
01:04:00like sprinkle. They love all those little candy and cupcake shops that we have, you know. And
01:04:04it's beautiful over there, but it's different over here too, you know. The food is so hard,
01:04:08though. My husband, he tapped out about a week ago and he says, I'm going home. He wants like
01:04:12real bruschetta, real caprese. He wants like real Italian food. And real Italian food, as you know,
01:04:18is very different than what a lot of people think it is. So I'm not eating pasta every day. I mean,
01:04:23it's just very different. You know, people think you're going to get huge, but.
01:04:26Yeah. No, I remember when I went to Rome, I thought I was going to put on weight from all
01:04:30the pasta and all the wine and everything, but I didn't. I lost weight and also all the walking.
01:04:34Like I came back skinnier. It was really weird.
01:04:36Rome is a walking city. Rome, you walk everywhere to the Colosseum, to everywhere,
01:04:40but like you said, the food, I mean, the pasta that they make has three ingredients. I mean,
01:04:45it doesn't sit on a shelf for a month and have all this, you know, artificial stuff inside.
01:04:50Are you hungry yet?
01:04:51I am, actually.
01:04:54Yeah, but I do love it. I'm grateful that, you know, I'm able to be there and still come back
01:04:59here and yeah, you got to come visit me.
01:05:03Believe me, girl. I am so there. I am so there. Well, thank you so much for coming on. It's been
01:05:09so incredible to see you. Can you tell everybody where they can find you online?
01:05:14Yes. So I am at TaraPatrick.com and you will find links on there to my fleshlight,
01:05:21my new book that's coming out, Happy Ending.
01:05:23Just in time for Christmas.
01:05:25Just in time for Christmas. My webcam schedule, anything Tara Patrick is on TaraPatrick.com.
01:05:32And thank you.
01:05:32Perfect. And you can find me at Holly Randall on Twitter and Instagram. And we are actually,
01:05:39after this, going to do a little fan submitted Q&A, which will only be available on my Patreon.
01:05:44So if you want to see her answers to your questions, you can go to Patreon.com
01:05:50slash Holly Randall Unfiltered and also be eligible for all kinds of other cool prizes.
01:05:54I give away books, I give away signed prints, all kinds of stuff for you guys supporting my
01:05:59podcast, which I appreciate so much because I could not do this without you guys. Thank you
01:06:04so much and we will see you next week.