• 9 months ago
The Wonton Don | Barstool Chicago
Transcript
00:00 [YELLING]
00:03 [EXPLOSION]
00:05 [MUSIC PLAYING]
00:08 Last practice before game day.
00:13 How are you feeling, Billy?
00:14 Good.
00:14 Hopefully, we can just sharpen and tighten up
00:17 some of the last things.
00:19 The turnout does not look great.
00:20 Yeah.
00:21 I mean, I'm just worried maybe people
00:23 didn't show up because they think Billy's a frog.
00:25 [BLEEP]
00:26 What did you do to the folks?
00:28 That was Billy.
00:28 You have to talk to Billy about that.
00:30 It's a bad joke.
00:31 He used to have a lot of pet frogs.
00:33 My boss would go, oh, you're [BLEEP] the frogs.
00:37 And he made a bad joke.
00:38 And now everyone's like, don't go near the frogs.
00:41 Billy [BLEEP] frogs.
00:42 Billy has never had [BLEEP] with a frog.
00:44 Never had [BLEEP] with a frog.
00:45 Never had [BLEEP] with a frog.
00:47 You're going to get me arrested.
00:48 Yeah, no, I'll stop.
00:50 Here we go.
00:50 So thank you guys all for showing up.
00:52 I know this practice wasn't originally planned.
00:54 But if we are going to beat Kenya, we need the extra work.
00:57 And today's going to be very easy, no hitting.
01:00 We're now doing all mental reps.
01:02 We're going to be the best offense in Africa.
01:05 I promise you that.
01:08 We put in yesterday quarterback power.
01:11 And I put in a new play that's called Nyaj.
01:15 Is that an appropriate name?
01:18 Wait, wait, wait.
01:18 What's the name, coach?
01:19 Nyaj.
01:20 Nyaj.
01:20 Nyaj.
01:21 Nyaj.
01:21 Nyaj.
01:22 Nyaj.
01:22 [LAUGHTER]
01:24 Nyaj.
01:25 Nyaj.
01:25 I think we are good.
01:26 What does that mean?
01:28 Ass.
01:29 Ass.
01:30 OK, I think that's fine.
01:31 Everybody likes a big Nyaj.
01:34 It's his favorite food.
01:36 Ah, I don't like to eat Nyaj.
01:38 I do not eat Nyaj.
01:41 OK, I like to admire them.
01:43 Let's get focused.
01:43 Let's get focused.
01:44 Sorry.
01:45 So Nyaj, first wide out runs a hitch.
01:48 Second runs a flag.
01:50 The tight end runs an over route.
01:52 Also, we're going to have in our defense--
01:54 I know a lot of the defense isn't here--
01:56 we're going to have a blitz call.
01:57 And we'll call that AK, AK-47.
02:01 Everyone's got AK-47s around here except me.
02:04 That's a good thing.
02:05 You may hear me calling from the sideline, AK-47, AK-47.
02:08 That's the two inside linebackers blitzing.
02:11 Billy just named a play AK-47.
02:13 There's actually a high risk for a terror attack
02:17 over the next few days.
02:19 The government has confirmed that I
02:20 think like six or seven rebels made it across the border.
02:23 I just don't think it's a good idea for us
02:26 to be screaming AK-47 at a crowded event.
02:29 We're going to just walk through dive left out of Rhino.
02:32 Down.
02:34 Set.
02:35 Hut.
02:37 No, no, no.
02:37 Did you say stretch or dive?
02:40 I said stretch.
02:40 It was dive.
02:41 Strong left, Nyaj right on one.
02:43 So do it.
02:44 Just I want to hear you do it.
02:45 Strong right.
02:46 Strong left.
02:47 Strong left.
02:48 Strong left.
02:48 Right.
02:49 No, no, strong left.
02:51 No, it's just strong left, Nyaj.
02:53 Strong left, Nyaj.
02:54 Strong left, Nyaj.
02:56 Right.
02:56 Hut.
02:57 Practice got off to a slow start.
02:59 George, we just worked on this.
03:00 You're supposed to run left.
03:02 Due to some miscommunication between Billy and our QB,
03:04 George.
03:05 So right now I want you to run strong left in Tebe.
03:08 Remember.
03:09 Strong left.
03:11 Strong left.
03:11 Ready.
03:12 Time out.
03:13 Time out.
03:13 He said Kampala.
03:14 He said Kampala.
03:15 Tebe.
03:16 Tebe.
03:17 Hut.
03:18 [INAUDIBLE]
03:21 Why didn't you guys run in Tebe?
03:22 I need you to run strong left in Tebe.
03:27 Like, let's do it.
03:28 Come on.
03:29 Hut.
03:29 [INAUDIBLE]
03:32 Leo, Leo.
03:33 Oh, yes.
03:34 Touchdown.
03:36 Way to hold onto that.
03:37 But once we got the cobwebs out, our offense was looking slick.
03:40 That's how we're going to win this game.
03:42 And Billy was in high spirits.
03:44 Get that gritty on tape.
03:46 Or at least he was until I tried calling a play.
03:49 Run a strong right in Tebe.
03:51 Wait, wait, no, you can't call that.
03:53 Time out.
03:53 Time out.
03:54 Time out.
03:54 Wait, wait, come on.
03:55 Bro, it's already so complicated.
03:56 We have Rhino personnel in here.
03:58 Thought I could call one play, Billy.
03:59 Thought I could call one play.
04:01 Donnie, you literally fucked it up so badly.
04:03 I didn't know--
04:04 Tebe's already hard.
04:05 I didn't know we were doing Rhino.
04:06 I thought Tebe was the simplest pass play we had.
04:11 Oh, fucking A.
04:13 This is our last hour to really get some quality work done.
04:17 And then we can take our rest day, relax.
04:19 Thank you guys so much for coming out for the extra day.
04:21 You will remember, when we beat Kenya, you'll be thinking,
04:25 thank God we practiced on Friday and came out,
04:27 because we are going to kick their fucking ass, guys.
04:31 I'm telling you, you guys are going to go hard.
04:33 You're well prepared.
04:34 Like, let's go out there, put something together,
04:37 give me one solid hour, and let's fucking get after it.
04:42 If you can get four yards to carry,
04:45 you just run the ball the whole game.
04:46 Hut!
04:47 Oh!
04:53 Yeah!
04:54 Hut!
04:55 Cover your mouth!
04:56 Cover your mouth!
04:57 [INAUDIBLE]
04:58 [CHEERING]
05:01 In our last hour of practice, we were no longer
05:05 playing like a team, but a family.
05:09 We got it!
05:10 We got it!
05:10 We got it, baby!
05:11 And I had a feeling our Philly special, AKA, we got it,
05:15 AKA, we Gonda--
05:17 Push!
05:18 Push!
05:19 Yes!
05:20 --would be unstoppable.
05:22 What we want to do is we want to fuck up this guy.
05:25 All the power of all of you guys are going
05:27 to be pushing whoever's here, and they won't be
05:30 able to withstand your whole power.
05:32 Touchdown!
05:33 Hut!
05:34 Hut!
05:35 [CHEERING]
05:38 Perfect.
05:43 Come on, you're such a--
05:44 Perfect.
05:45 I think they're going to call practice.
05:47 All right, guys, gather around.
05:48 First off, take a knee.
05:49 Take a knee.
05:50 I would like to thank you guys for having Donnie and I.
05:54 Playing with you and coaching you guys
05:56 has been some of the most fun I've had in a long time
05:59 since I played football.
06:01 I love--
06:01 Same here.
06:02 I love this sport.
06:03 I love this sport more than anything,
06:06 playing this sport, coaching this sport, being around it.
06:08 So this has been the most fun I've
06:10 had since I played myself.
06:12 And we really appreciate all you guys coming out,
06:14 because I know a lot of you have another job.
06:17 Some of you have families.
06:18 You know, you don't have to be here,
06:20 but you're here for your brothers,
06:22 and that's what's important.
06:23 For the love of the sport and your country.
06:27 So you guys have prepared well.
06:29 You guys studied the plays before the game on Sunday.
06:34 The hard part is over.
06:36 This is the hard part.
06:38 The game is easy.
06:39 The game is easy because you did all the work now.
06:42 And because of that, we are going to kick Kenya's
06:45 fucking ass back to Kenya.
06:48 What's the name of the Kenyan team?
06:50 White Rhinos.
06:51 The White Rhinos.
06:52 OK.
06:52 Well, last time I checked, White Rhinos were endangered.
06:55 Yeah.
06:56 After Sunday, they're going to be extinct.
06:59 Let's go.
07:00 [CHEERING]
07:03 We are generals.
07:04 We shoot rhinos.
07:06 Bang, bang.
07:07 Never shoot an actual rhino, though.
07:09 OK?
07:10 They are critically endangered.
07:12 We're going to kick their niche.
07:13 And guess what?
07:14 It's all because of the preparation you guys
07:16 did these past couple days.
07:18 From the first day I got here, the first second I was here,
07:21 you guys have learned so much.
07:22 You've been great students of the game.
07:25 And you can't ask for something better as a coach.
07:28 Rest up, boys.
07:29 Study the playbook.
07:30 We're going to become the best offense in Africa
07:32 with the best defense in Africa.
07:34 And we're going to beat the fuck out of Kenya.
07:37 Last thing, football is not a game.
07:39 We have fun.
07:40 This is fun practice, the game.
07:42 When you show up on Sunday, it is war.
07:46 You can die.
07:47 No, let's not.
07:49 Let's not get them too scared.
07:50 You can die playing football.
07:52 That means you can't show up thinking it's a game.
07:56 It's not a fucking game.
07:57 You've got to come with the right mentality,
07:59 ready to go to fucking war.
08:01 Because if you don't have that mentality
08:03 that you're going to fuck them up,
08:05 they're going to fuck you up.
08:07 And you're going to get seriously injured.
08:08 You've got to come out focused, adrenaline-strong, rest.
08:14 No going out looking for nage the night before.
08:17 No nage in general.
08:18 If you have a wife, girlfriend, shoot.
08:21 No niash.
08:22 No nash all week.
08:23 There was supposed to be no nash all week.
08:25 Today they can have a little nash.
08:27 No nash.
08:28 No nash.
08:29 Ashpi, no nash.
08:31 If you have a wife, sleep in a different room.
08:32 No nash.
08:33 Sunday night is nash night.
08:35 Sunday night is nash night.
08:36 Canyon nash.
08:38 Hydrate.
08:39 Drink a lot of electrolytes, potassium.
08:41 Bananas have a lot of potassium.
08:43 We don't want to cramp up on game day
08:46 and drink a lot of water because, you know,
08:48 playing a full football game compares nothing to this.
08:51 It's going to be a very fun time.
08:54 When you go out there and you hit a guy so damn hard
08:58 that they get their air knocked out of them,
09:00 you're standing over them after jacking them the fuck up,
09:04 there's no better feeling in life.
09:07 Just desecrating him and making him quit,
09:10 not just destroying his body, but his own will to play the game.
09:14 There's no better feeling.
09:15 That first hit of the game, that's going to get rid of all your nerves.
09:18 So if you're a little nervous before the game,
09:20 when you get that first tackle or you lay someone out with a block,
09:24 all those butterflies are going to fly out of your stomach.
09:27 We're not going to let them come in here and beat Uganda in Uganda.
09:32 I will not let that happen.
09:33 So let's bring it in for one final time.
09:35 Uganda.
09:37 Ready, ready.
09:38 One, two, three.
09:39 -Giant!
09:40 After practice, a player named Ghost asked to talk to me.
09:45 What's up?
09:46 You know, when they were advertising this thing here,
09:48 they posted a photo of somebody in a helmet.
09:51 -Yes.
09:52 -With a W on it.
09:53 And I've seen it before.
09:56 In Shanghai, in Shanghai, Florida.
09:58 Have you played in the CNFL?
10:00 As it turned out, he had played in the same Chinese football league as I had.
10:04 I actually started playing football in China in 2015 for the Chengdu Mustangs.
10:10 I had traveled to China.
10:11 My mom invited me to go live with her.
10:13 So God gave me the opportunity to play and I played.
10:17 I didn't know what football ever seen.
10:18 Awesome.
10:19 It also turned out he was our team captain.
10:21 This team has a captain.
10:23 He goes by the codename Ghost.
10:26 I ended up as captain because the coach kind of realized that
10:30 I had the things that were required to be a leader.
10:33 But hadn't been allowed to practice with the team
10:35 ever since he had publicly voiced some concerns about the Ugandan Football Federation.
10:39 This is not being run the right way.
10:42 You know?
10:43 Yeah.
10:44 They claim to have support from different organizations.
10:48 The American Embassy, they give them the funds and everything.
10:51 But where does it all go?
10:53 We don't see none of that.
10:54 So me as captain, I had to say something.
10:56 And Ghost was not the only one with complaints.
10:59 If there's funding or if there's any money coming through,
11:01 it should really be reached to the ground.
11:03 Because most of our leaders, honestly, they wouldn't be there for us.
11:09 As outsiders, we didn't want to get involved in African football politics.
11:13 I get it. You're a man of integrity.
11:16 And you want to take your stand.
11:18 But you've got to decide whether you want to play or you want to keep...
11:21 You know, fighting.
11:22 Yeah.
11:23 But definitely needed as many experienced players on the field come game day.
11:27 So agreed to do whatever we could to get him greenlit to rejoin the squad.
11:31 If you're looking out for me, then I appreciate it.
11:33 Meanwhile, Ghost agreed to do whatever he could to keep the team motivated
11:37 and focused on the task at hand.
11:39 When we were down, taking a knee,
11:41 somebody talked about going into the game with a mindset
11:45 to fuck up somebody else.
11:47 Right?
11:48 Now how are we going to do that?
11:49 We're not going to go and wake up talking to ourselves that we're going to do it.
11:53 No, we don't talk to ourselves.
11:55 We are ourselves.
11:57 You don't need to talk to yourself to know something.
11:59 You just got to know who you are.
12:01 You understand?
12:02 So when you go, you got to know exactly what you're doing.
12:05 When you're in the bathroom, what are you going to do in the bathroom?
12:08 Eat? No.
12:09 You're going to clean your balls.
12:11 If you're in the football field, you're going to play American football.
12:14 What you need to do is work better.
12:17 Okay?
12:19 How do we work better?
12:20 We use our hearts and our brains.
12:23 This is to know exactly what you're doing, when to do it, and how to do it.
12:27 Football is controlled aggression, and it's what y'all need to do.
12:31 I was not in camp because of some issues, but I don't care.
12:36 I was here anyway because I need to look over my team.
12:39 Just in case that I do not play on Sunday,
12:41 I overheard some boys saying they're going to quit, they're going to sit out.
12:44 Don't do that.
12:45 Please, play.
12:46 They came here to share their expertise and their experience for you guys to learn.
12:51 So don't waste it.
12:52 It's not in vain.
12:54 Okay?
12:55 So play. It doesn't matter if I'm there or not.
12:57 Play. Play your asses off.
12:59 I saw you guys on the line, some of y'all doing this.
13:02 This is not the stance.
13:04 This is the goddamn stance.
13:06 Because you're going to get up with explosion and hit somebody's ass.
13:09 You're not going to hit them like this.
13:11 How the fuck are you going to move like that?
13:13 Huh?
13:14 Kenya's going to be here.
13:15 We got to show who we are.
13:18 Do you understand?
13:20 No, I didn't hear that shit.
13:21 Do you understand?
13:22 Yes.
13:23 Generals, what is our profession?
13:25 Woo! Woo! Woo!
13:27 That's it. Good job.
13:29 I'll see you guys on Sunday.
13:32 See y'all.
13:33 My nigga is on YouTube.
13:43 Camp was officially over.
13:45 And tomorrow was our first day off all trip.
13:47 So I decided to take the crew to see the source of the Nile.
13:50 Which Billy was not too excited about.
13:53 I'm being rational right now.
13:55 If a terrorist were to attack, it would be at the security.
13:58 Come on, dude.
14:00 Can you just take this seriously?
14:02 I am taking this very seriously.
14:04 So, a little back story.
14:07 We're exactly where the embassy told us not to be.
14:10 The largest music festival in East Africa is this weekend.
14:14 It's called Niaga Niaga Festival.
14:17 And the US embassy put out a warning saying that US citizens should not go.
14:22 Because some terrorists entered the country.
14:25 They said they're specifically targeting this concert.
14:30 Yeah, so no one has to go inside the music festival.
14:33 We are here to see the source of the Nile.
14:35 And then we're going to go tubing down the Nile.
14:37 We're going to do a little hippo mode in the Nile.
14:40 Let's go hippo mode in the Nile.
14:42 Let's not fuck around and get blown up.
14:44 I think you guys are saying the same thing.
14:46 But as it turned out, the only way to get to the source of the Nile was by entering the music festival.
14:52 Billy just got held up at the second checkpoint in this concert for having two paxes in.
15:03 And also wearing boots and pants that made him look like a military officer.
15:08 They thought the zin was cocaine and they thought I was in the military.
15:12 They thought I was Russian.
15:14 Oh God. You do look a little Russian.
15:17 And Russians always bring cocaine to music festivals.
15:20 Yeah, there's people walking around with guns.
15:22 Okay, that makes me feel better. I just wish they would give me one.
15:26 I mean, you made me pay some dude 50,000 Ugandan shillings so you could hold the gun for two minutes last night.
15:32 You didn't let me keep it.
15:34 Yeah, he's not going to let you keep a gun.
15:36 The terrorists will not win. That's why we're here.
15:40 But maybe the terrorists had one.
15:42 Because the festival vibes were not great.
15:46 Dude, fuck these terrorists.
15:54 They ruined the fucking festival for everybody.
15:57 If it wasn't for the US Embassy warning or the ADF actually trying to plot a bomb attack,
16:03 this place would be packed right now with foreign yash.
16:07 It's really sad.
16:08 It is sad.
16:10 Fuck you ADF. I'll fight you with my hands. Like a man.
16:16 What is that thing? Is this Fanta Chess?
16:20 Seeing we were already putting our lives at risk by being there, we decided to make the most of it.
16:25 [Music]
16:31 The boys are buzzing.
16:33 You're looking awesome.
16:35 Alright, so let's get some beers and then let's go see the source of the Nile.
16:39 [Music]
16:44 So right now, we are going to see the starting point of the White Nile.
16:48 And this is what I see.
16:50 It takes three months to reach Egypt. Three months to complete the journey to the Mediterranean Sea.
16:56 So this is the beginning point of that.
16:58 Oh wow.
16:59 The other side is right there.
17:01 Dude, it's the literal source of the Nile right there.
17:04 Source of the Nile, honestly very inspiring.
17:06 Many men died trying to locate that.
17:09 Shout out Stanley Livingston.
17:11 He never made it, I did.
17:13 Don't mean to flex on old explorers.
17:15 See all that water bubbling up?
17:17 30% of all of the Nile River water comes from that spot.
17:23 And now I'd have a chance to get even more intimate with this historic river.
17:27 About to go hippo mode at the source of the Nile.
17:30 Look at this little hippo mode spot though.
17:32 Welcome to the infinity pool.
17:34 This is my world, created by me.
17:37 You can swim, you can feel the Nile, you can take pictures around.
17:41 Take this one, take this one.
17:43 Gotta make sure I don't swallow any of this water.
17:45 Donny, make sure nothing squirts up your dick.
17:48 Yeah, I will.
17:49 Alright, source of the Nile hippo mode review.
17:56 Temp wise, this is the perfect temp.
17:58 It's not too warm, it's very refreshing when you've got the African sun beating down on you.
18:03 You know who's not afraid of the African sun? Billy.
18:05 He hasn't put on sunscreen once this entire trip.
18:08 I thought it was tougher than the African sun.
18:10 Take a look at this.
18:12 This is your ideal male physique.
18:14 I am scared of something swimming up my dick, and that's why I'm not jumping in the river.
18:19 Okay, now, I know there's rumors in the Amazon that there's a type of fish that can swim up your urethra and get stuck there.
18:27 I think that's just a myth, but there is some type of parasite that actually can swim up the pee hole.
18:33 But nah, they don't have that here.
18:35 Yeah, it's up.
18:37 They don't have a fish that swims up your dick?
18:39 No, it's a parasite.
18:41 There's a parasite that swims up your dick?
18:43 Just a parasite.
18:44 These Nile beers hit different at the source of the Nile.
18:47 Yes.
18:48 As long as I don't get a parasite, I'm going to rate this an 8.9.
18:53 8.9 out of 10.
18:55 That's very high on my hippo mode rating scale.
18:58 Yeah, man.
18:59 Because this is historic.
19:01 People searched.
19:02 I mean, you guys probably knew it was here all along, but there was a lot of Europeans trying to find this for hundreds of years.
19:09 A lot of white men died trying to find this.
19:12 Do you know Chagulani?
19:14 Yeah, but you know Chagulani?
19:15 Do you know Chagulani Bobwine?
19:17 Who is that?
19:19 The president of Uganda.
19:21 He is the president?
19:22 Yes, Chagulani Bobwine.
19:23 Oh, okay.
19:24 Yeah, yeah, man.
19:25 Do you guys like him?
19:26 Yeah.
19:27 I don't know him well.
19:28 But the swimmers are like this.
19:29 Oh, yeah.
19:30 Like this.
19:31 Yeah.
19:32 Yes.
19:33 Nah.
19:34 [laughter]
19:37 Oh, man.
19:38 I like how I can just sit here because this guy over there just made his own man-made pool.
19:42 Because you are the one who made this pool, this is for you, too.
19:46 Oh.
19:47 A hippo mode shirt.
19:48 Oh, thanks.
19:49 Yeah.
19:50 Because you and this guy is a pioneer of the hippo mode movement.
19:53 He only built this little hippo mode spot six months ago.
19:56 So, you know, if I had come to Uganda a year ago, I wouldn't have been able to swim at the source of the Nile.
20:02 But thanks to you, I could.
20:04 So I'm glad that you decided to come here.
20:07 You felt the Nile there.
20:09 I felt the Nile.
20:11 [music]
20:15 Listen, I know it's the day before game day.
20:18 And I'm sure people are saying, "Why aren't you at a film sesh?"
20:21 Well, we have no film.
20:23 We have no Kenyan film.
20:25 So we had a day off.
20:26 And I need to get my mind right.
20:28 And I get my mind right by going hippo mode at the source of the Nile.
20:33 We had to walk back to the festival on the way out.
20:36 And while the situation had not improved...
20:38 [music]
20:42 Some very interesting characters had started showing up.
20:45 Is this hot at all?
20:47 It's got to be a little hot, right?
20:48 It's got to be so hot.
20:50 Oof.
20:51 [music]
20:53 Help me understand what she's doing.
20:54 Um, I don't know.
20:56 I think it might be an anti-abortion thing or something like that.
20:59 Okay.
21:00 It's an anti-abortion demonstration.
21:02 [inaudible]
21:04 Miss Karen, help.
21:06 Okay, yeah.
21:07 Save the babies.
21:08 [music]
21:10 Where are you coming from?
21:11 I'm coming from Massachusetts.
21:12 Massachusetts.
21:13 This is your original home, by the way.
21:15 I know, I know.
21:16 We know that humanity began here.
21:19 Okay.
21:20 So it's very nice to come back here.
21:21 And check it out.
21:22 And check it out, yes.
21:23 Okay.
21:24 Mzungu.
21:25 2 o'clock.
21:27 Hey, how are you?
21:29 Oh, this is condom awareness.
21:31 Diego Niega is where there will be no clean sheets.
21:35 I think we just showed up too early.
21:38 The bottom line is that the terrorists did not win.
21:41 We still came.
21:42 People are still coming in.
21:44 They got so much security here, man.
21:46 Good luck, if you're a member of the ADF.
21:49 Good luck.
21:50 We were grateful to have survived the festival.
21:53 Just hoped we'd be able to say the same thing after our next activity.
21:57 Now, to wrap up the day, we're going to go tubing on the Nile.
22:00 We signed up for the Extreme course.
22:02 That guy's in a Joe Flacco jersey.
22:04 Excuse me, sir.
22:05 Do you think Joe Flacco is elite?
22:07 Sorry?
22:08 Do you think Joe Flacco is elite?
22:10 Joe Flacco?
22:11 Oh, yeah.
22:12 You think he's elite?
22:13 Yeah, exactly.
22:14 Yes.
22:15 Joe Flacco is elite.
22:16 That's the correct answer, sir.
22:17 Best answer.
22:18 All right.
22:19 I am pumped to go tubing.
22:20 Let's go.
22:21 I got a hippo motif.
22:22 You want to wear it to cover the chest?
22:23 Do you have another one?
22:24 Yeah.
22:25 Oh, I'll take it.
22:26 [Music]
22:28 Didn't have any sandals.
22:30 It's clean mud.
22:32 How do you know that?
22:33 I don't.
22:34 Are we going to be ready for the game tomorrow?
22:36 We're just fucked right now, dude.
22:38 I think maybe we're...
22:39 At least once we're on the river, it's going to be relaxing.
22:42 Although, we did sign up for the Extreme course.
22:44 Right off the bat, I could tell that signing up for an Extreme tube ride down the Nile was a questionable decision.
22:51 We got a game tomorrow, and we're just trekking through an African marsh.
22:55 You're about to hop on a tube, and it's like fucking 4.45 p.m.
22:58 This is not good.
23:00 But it was too late to turn back.
23:02 Listen, you only get one chance to wrap the Nile.
23:04 Yeah.
23:05 You got to seize it, even if it's a game day eve.
23:09 Cheers.
23:10 To the mighty Nile.
23:13 I need a nap.
23:15 I've been averaging like five hours of sleep each night, seven to ten beers a day.
23:24 And we got to play football tomorrow.
23:28 Yeah.
23:29 I'm ready to fucking die for Uganda.
23:32 The trip started off pretty relaxing.
23:34 Today's about getting our mind right.
23:36 If we spent all Saturday just stressing out about the game, we'd be burnt out come Sunday.
23:42 It's still relaxing tubing before the game.
23:46 That was fun.
23:49 That's the perfect level of excitement I need before the game.
23:52 I don't need anything more extreme.
23:54 Donnie, that was the easiest one.
23:56 Towards the end, things started getting hairy.
23:59 As the weather took a turn for the worse.
24:04 Oh, shit.
24:06 Oh, fuck.
24:09 That's terrifying.
24:11 Oh, fuck.
24:13 And the rapids up ahead looked menacing.
24:16 Take a rest day, they said.
24:18 Oh, fuck.
24:20 Alright, we're on a roll, boys.
24:22 Oh, shit.
24:26 Fuck.
24:27 Oh.
24:28 Oh, my God.
24:47 Oh, my God.
24:49 Oh, shit.
24:51 What the fuck?
24:53 Oh, my God.
24:55 That was a fucking ropeway.
24:57 Oh, my God.
24:59 Oh, God.
25:01 When I was fucking getting tossed around underwater, the one thing I could think of was like,
25:05 "Is Michael Angelo going to be okay?"
25:07 Dude, it came out of nowhere, kind of.
25:10 More concerned about the lightning than I am the rapids now.
25:17 Look at all those bugs.
25:19 Tubing down a waterfall in the midst of a lightning storm was indeed not the right choice before game day.
25:25 But there was nothing we could do about it now.
25:27 Alright, we got to get in the car.
25:29 Except for dry off, get some sleep, and wake up tomorrow ready to beat Kenya.
25:34 Tune in next week for the first ever "Part of My Cheese Steak" Africa Bowl.
25:41 [Music]

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