• 9 months ago
Bianca Del Rio is a comedy queen known for her unfiltered opinions, and she definitely didn’t hold back during this round of Expensive Taste Test. Watch as she decides which sewing kit costs more (pro tip when purchasing: you’ll never need the knitting needles) and drags the kitten heels we gave her to choose from. Apologies in advance if you own a pair.

#BiancaDel Rio # ExpensiveTasteTest #Cosmopolitan

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https://www.thebiancadelrio.com/dead-inside-tour

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Transcript
00:00 And this, what is the point of this tiny little heel?
00:02 This is like an orthopedic drag shoe.
00:05 I'm Bianca Del Rio,
00:06 and I'm playing Expensive Taste Test with Cosmo.
00:08 I think I have expensive taste,
00:11 but by looking at me, you can tell that I'm cheap,
00:15 if that makes any sense.
00:16 (upbeat music)
00:18 We've got some earrings here.
00:22 I know a lot about jewelry.
00:24 Now, my first instinct is to look at these,
00:27 'cause I like these, and they are flashier,
00:30 so I go, okay, this is gonna probably be
00:32 the more expensive pair,
00:34 but you wouldn't do that to me, would you?
00:36 No, I think, mm, but these aren't green on the back.
00:40 A big pet peeve of mine.
00:41 (groans)
00:43 The clasp on these look a little fancier.
00:46 This one, not so much.
00:47 This is a lot like me, pretty from the front,
00:49 not so attractive from the back.
00:50 These have some heft to it.
00:51 These seem more like a luxury item.
00:54 I think, in my humble opinion,
00:56 that these are the more expensive earrings.
01:00 Am I right?
01:01 (cash register dings)
01:03 (laughs)
01:05 Expensive taste.
01:07 Bring on the next one.
01:08 (upbeat music)
01:10 I'm now given two handheld fans, am I correct?
01:17 On first feel, this over here
01:19 appears to be a little heavier.
01:22 Are there batteries in this,
01:23 or is this some type of contraption?
01:25 All right, so this charges, but the heft on this,
01:28 it seems nice, it seems like it'd be more expensive
01:30 'cause it's heavy,
01:32 but then you gotta lug it around all day.
01:34 Let's see how it blows.
01:35 Oh, there it comes.
01:37 All right.
01:38 All right, it's a nice breeze.
01:40 So far, this seems like an expensive item
01:42 that you wouldn't wanna buy for yourself,
01:44 but that weird gift you get at Christmas
01:46 that somebody picked up at the mall.
01:49 Okay, set our aside.
01:50 This one here, light, compact,
01:53 perfect for a gay man.
01:54 Hey girl, hey girl.
01:56 You can still hold your drink,
01:58 still keeps you cool, but it is lighter.
02:00 This seems more like a drugstore.
02:03 This more seems like a New Jersey mall.
02:06 I would say the one on my right hand
02:08 is the more expensive blower.
02:10 (cash register dings)
02:12 Ah!
02:13 Yes!
02:15 Yes!
02:17 God, to get blown properly on camera.
02:20 (upbeat music)
02:23 Next, we have travel sewing kits.
02:28 I am pretty aware of the sewing serial,
02:30 so I'm pretty good with this.
02:31 So let me look at this one here.
02:33 Okay, these are cottony threads,
02:37 which is not gonna really work well in a pinch.
02:40 You wanna have something with a little rayon in it
02:43 so it actually pulls in and out.
02:44 This gets all gunked up.
02:46 You can always tell by the scissors.
02:49 Okay, the scissors do have some heft to it, okay?
02:52 Scissors are not bad.
02:54 This right here, this is the cheapest thing
02:57 you're ever gonna buy.
02:57 So you wanna avoid these.
02:59 These fix nothing!
03:01 Okay, so so far this is the cheap one.
03:03 Who the hell actually starts knitting on a trip?
03:06 Like all of a sudden,
03:07 "I gotta re-crochet that blouse."
03:09 No, don't get it.
03:10 Let me see, how do we like this?
03:12 You want this standing up?
03:13 Let's see this one.
03:15 Okay, now this is arranged better than this one.
03:19 This one has obviously got some heft to it,
03:21 but at this point, since I seem to be so smart,
03:24 these are probably the same price
03:26 and you're just (beep) with me.
03:28 Let's check the scissors.
03:29 It's a smooth scissor.
03:31 Scissor, scissor, scissor, scissor.
03:33 All of a sudden I'm having a stroke.
03:35 Scissor!
03:36 Okay, it's a good scissor.
03:37 There's good scissors in both of them,
03:40 but for some reason I'm leaning towards this.
03:42 Not that it's bigger, that it's more expensive,
03:44 but I just feel like this might be the more expensive item.
03:49 (cash register dings)
03:52 Ah, three for three!
03:55 (laughs)
03:56 It's a telltale sign, those little shitty needles.
03:59 You don't wanna use those.
04:00 (upbeat music)
04:03 So next we have blush, which I know a little bit about.
04:10 Okay, just looking at it.
04:12 This here, nice heft to it.
04:16 Nice sleek black finish.
04:19 If it's a bitch to open, that means it's expensive.
04:22 It's a bitch, okay.
04:24 Nice little shimmery color, little pinky color.
04:27 This so far, I think is the heftier, more expensive item.
04:32 Now let's go to this one.
04:33 Very lightweight for a gal on the go.
04:36 Opens easy.
04:37 No glitter in it, no shimmer in it.
04:41 I'm gonna test them out on my wrist,
04:42 because everyone needs a properly rouged wrist.
04:46 Uh-huh, look how feminine my wrist looks.
04:48 As a gay man, my wrist is already feminine.
04:50 (crew laughs)
04:51 I mean, that goes on nicely.
04:52 Not much pigment, so once again,
04:54 I think this is the cheapy.
04:56 But let's test the pigment.
04:58 You'd think with these man hands,
05:00 I could open this a lot faster.
05:02 All right.
05:03 Oh, I see the shimmer.
05:06 I do see the shimmer.
05:08 I think the more expensive item is this one on my right.
05:13 (bell dings)
05:15 Look at this!
05:16 Look at that!
05:18 You said I wasn't gonna win.
05:19 (upbeat music)
05:21 Next, we have a Drag Queen faux paw kitten heels.
05:29 No drag queen should be wearing this shoe ever.
05:33 First of all, this thing back, not pretty for a man foot.
05:37 And this, what is the point of this tiny little heel?
05:40 This is like an orthopedic drag shoe.
05:42 I wouldn't recommend it,
05:44 but I will still continue with my job
05:46 of trying to decide which is expensive and which is cheap.
05:50 All right, I'm gonna look at this pair first.
05:52 I usually go to the right, but I'm gonna go to the left.
05:54 I'm gonna look at this lovely shade of taupe,
05:58 a nice patent leather, possibly faux.
06:02 I'm looking at it closely.
06:03 There is craftsmanship in the heel.
06:06 It's not my taste in shoe, but it could be expensive.
06:10 Let's check these over here.
06:13 Oh, there's some heft to these.
06:16 Not my style.
06:17 The only redeeming thing about the shoe
06:19 is that it's a slight mirror,
06:20 so I can see myself in it,
06:21 which would probably be very helpful
06:22 for those ladies who are in a long line in a bathroom.
06:25 I don't know.
06:26 Little buckle in the front detail
06:29 seems to be more expensive, maybe.
06:32 Or they're trying to be expensive,
06:33 'cause that's also another trick they do with shoes.
06:35 They add more shit to make it look fancy.
06:38 These are the least expensive,
06:40 and these are the more expensive.
06:42 I am going to, what do I win anyway?
06:47 Do I win anything for this?
06:48 I become a Cosmo girl, right?
06:49 I get to be on the cover, right?
06:51 That's, yeah, yeah, I thought that's what it was.
06:52 Negotiate!
06:53 I will drink anything, all right?
07:01 And usually if it burns more, it's cheaper.
07:04 That's what I find to be true.
07:06 Should I sample the one on the right first?
07:07 I'm going to.
07:08 Oh, it's not even chilled.
07:10 Oh, this is really gonna put hair on my chest.
07:12 Okay, sample one.
07:14 Hmm.
07:19 Okay.
07:20 Not bad.
07:22 Smooth.
07:23 Smooth.
07:24 Now, I don't normally drink vodka by itself,
07:26 but today I made an exception.
07:28 That's a lie, I drink all the time.
07:29 Oh God, inside.
07:30 I mean, are my insides are burning?
07:32 Is your shirts only vodka?
07:33 I don't trust you with that smirk.
07:35 All right, let me try the second one.
07:37 Hmm.
07:42 Not as smooth.
07:43 Not as smooth, a rough year for that potato.
07:45 Mm-mm, mm-mm.
07:47 All right, I would say, in my humble alcoholic opinion,
07:52 this is the more expensive one.
07:55 Boop, right there.
07:56 Ah!
08:00 I'm a drunk and a good chopper.
08:02 Yes, yes!
08:04 I have never won anything in my life,
08:05 except Drag Race.
08:06 I haven't won anything else in my life.
08:07 This is amazing.
08:08 Well, as I look at them,
08:15 these seem a little crusty.
08:19 Let me taste it, let's test.
08:21 Okay, I can feel the salt.
08:23 You really want me to bloat today, don't you?
08:25 Here, have some vodka, Bianca.
08:26 Eat a chip.
08:27 All right.
08:31 Mm, a lot of flavor here.
08:34 Not a bad crunch.
08:36 I mean, now, I am a chip expert,
08:39 where I can always know at a restaurant
08:41 if they've just re-heated the chips or if they're fresh.
08:44 These seem like they've been in a bag for a while.
08:46 You know, let me try these.
08:48 These are a little more golden.
08:50 They appear to be a little more authentic.
08:53 Not as salty.
08:54 Let's do the test.
08:56 Get that gold mine in here.
09:01 (chips crunching)
09:04 Mm, mm.
09:04 Okay.
09:07 Just by taste, heft, salt content,
09:12 that these are the more expensive chips?
09:17 (bell dings)
09:19 This is it, this is it.
09:21 I am gonna own Cosmo.
09:22 I am now getting the center spread and cover.
09:25 Yes!
09:27 You know what's sad?
09:28 Is that a 48-year-old drag queen
09:29 is taking pride in the fact that I know
09:31 the difference between cheap vodka and cheap chips.
09:33 This, I'm making my father proud today.
09:36 That's what I'm doing, if I knew who my father was.
09:39 (upbeat music)
09:42 Macaroons, now this is my favorite dessert.
09:47 And from the looks of it, these look raspberry, am I right?
09:49 Now these are a little heartier.
09:51 These are a little more bite-sized,
09:53 which makes me feel like this would be something
09:55 that you would see in some fancy French patisserie,
09:57 very small and concise, 'cause I'm French.
10:00 And this seems like an American type,
10:02 where they go, "Yeah, they look close enough."
10:04 So let's see.
10:05 I'm gonna have a taste.
10:07 Do you like my American accent?
10:10 I don't know.
10:11 Now, it feels a little gummy.
10:16 Doesn't feel as fresh.
10:19 Feels as though it's been sitting
10:22 in a container for a hot minute.
10:24 Let me try this one.
10:27 Oh, oh, oh, mm-mm, mm-mm.
10:31 Now this, mm-hmm, and maybe it's just the vodka talking,
10:35 but this flavors 100%.
10:39 Freshness, enjoyable, tasty, good.
10:43 This is, mm-hmm, yeah.
10:46 I would say that these right here
10:49 are the more expensive macaroons.
10:54 (bell dings)
10:56 (buzzer buzzes)
10:57 (yells)
10:59 Stop!
11:03 (yells)
11:06 Well, thank you for watching me play
11:08 Expensive Taste Test with Cosmo,
11:10 and sadly, we got one wrong.
11:12 If you enjoyed this episode,
11:13 you will enjoy my new show that I'm on tour with
11:16 called Dead Inside.
11:17 We hit over 60 cities in America and the USA
11:20 and the rest of the world to follow.
11:23 So come and see me!
11:25 (upbeat music)
11:27 (upbeat music)
11:30 (upbeat music)
11:32 (upbeat music)
11:35 (upbeat music)
11:37 (upbeat music)
11:40 (upbeat music)
11:43 (upbeat music)
11:45 (upbeat music)
11:48 (upbeat music)
11:50 (upbeat music)
11:53 [BLANK_AUDIO]

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