A group of old friends reunited at a funeral make a drunken pact. Rather than let each other suffer a slow and painful d | dHNfc0xPbHp3LURia0U
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00:00 I want everyone to come to my funeral dressed in a toga.
00:04 [LAUGHS]
00:05 I would want a cardboard coffin.
00:07 The best thing that I would like on my grave, son,
00:10 is do not disturb.
00:11 On the way out, I think staying alive by the Bee Gees.
00:14 That would set them on their way, wouldn't it?
00:15 I know mine's going to be great.
00:17 [MUSIC - THE BEE GEES, "TRUE LOVE"]
00:18 (SINGING) True love is what I feel for you.
00:20 True love.
00:21 Old friends reunite at a friend's funeral
00:24 where they agree on a drunken pact.
00:26 We all need to promise if any of us need it, we'll step up.
00:31 Help each other across the threshold.
00:34 If you had your set of own rules, what would they be and why?
00:38 Whenever I'm at a funeral, I always think,
00:40 what about my funeral?
00:41 What's that going to be like?
00:42 A thing about funerals is that actors
00:46 are really good at doing funerals.
00:49 So you've got the skill set.
00:51 People aren't frightened of feelings
00:54 because they've had to explore them a lot.
00:56 They're not embarrassed.
00:57 They go with heightened emotion.
00:59 Very good at reading eulogies, can speak well,
01:03 tell lots of jokes, really important.
01:06 Actors put on a really good show.
01:08 I would want a cardboard coffin because why waste
01:13 all that wood and brass and everything
01:15 when it just goes up in smoke?
01:17 I think the best thing that I would like on my grave
01:20 stone is do not disturb, or is anyone there?
01:25 If I should die of natural causes
01:26 and my body is healthy from all the meditation and prayers
01:30 that I've done, then to bury me in the earth under a tree
01:35 so that the vibrations will feed the earth and the tree
01:39 and I would be there forever.
01:41 I'd get my son to draw all his cartoons
01:43 that he can draw all over it, which he'd hate,
01:46 but he'd have to do it, wouldn't he?
01:47 That's all.
01:48 If I should die in a tragic kind of way
01:51 from some crazy man-made disease, burn my ass.
01:56 And then I start getting sort of naughty ideas.
01:59 Like when everyone's coming in to the church,
02:02 I'd like to be one of Chopin's nocturnes, really sad,
02:07 so that the sentimental can cry and the bored can sleep.
02:12 Him, I think it would have to be Comrande, which is a Welsh.
02:15 You hear it at rugby a lot.
02:16 It's very beautiful.
02:17 I've been on this earth for a long time,
02:20 and I have a very eclectic collection of music in my head.
02:25 I would just be satisfied.
02:27 Actually, I would never be satisfied, because I'd be dead
02:30 and I wouldn't know.
02:31 On the way out, I think Staying Alive by the Bee Gees.
02:34 There's a wonderful version of Staying Alive
02:37 by Joe Stafford's Alter Ego, and it's completely out of tune.
02:41 I'd like that one.
02:42 Yeah, that'll learn them.
02:44 And then there's my family, who would definitely
02:47 do the best music, the best jokes, at my expense,
02:53 and the best food.
02:54 I want everyone to come to my funeral dressed in a toga.
02:58 [LAUGHTER]
03:01 I want men to wear kente cloths.
03:03 Music, I want bells on their feet and flutes.
03:06 I figure like this, once I'm gone, it's up to you guys.
03:12 I'm always happy to talk about it and laugh about it,
03:16 but it's probably because I dread it,
03:19 because I don't want to leave the party.
03:20 I love it.
03:21 I love life.
03:22 The worst thing, not only are you dead,
03:25 but you can't be there.
03:26 And I'm really upset about that, because I
03:29 know mine's going to be great.
03:31 No one gets out of here alive.
03:33 Those who have gone on haven't come back.
03:37 There must be something good out there.
03:39 See you at the next funeral, unless it's yours.
03:42 Or yours.
03:43 What are friends for?
03:44 Stream "True Love" now on Channel 4.
03:49 [MUSIC PLAYING]
03:52 [MUSIC ENDS]
03:55 [AUDIO OUT]
03:59 [AUDIO OUT]
04:02 [AUDIO OUT]
04:05 [BLANK_AUDIO]