WHAT IS THE MEANING OF YOUR LIFE?

Name: WHAT IS THE MEANING OF YOUR LIFE?
Uploaded: 2024-01-08T19:43:13+00:00
Duration: 56 min 8 s
Channel: Stefan Molyneux

00:00 Alrighty, it's me.

00:03 Questions from freedomain.locals.com.

00:04 Hope you guys are doing well.

00:06 Great community to join.

00:07 I strongly suggest, urge and ask you to join and support at freedomain.locals.com.

00:14 Alright, somebody writes, I'm someone who is struggling to stay motivated in my business.

00:21 I own a small contracting business where I do estimates, provide services based on a

00:25 monthly subscription and also provide installations.

00:28 The work is very rewarding but on some days I struggle to even get out of bed.

00:34 I'm having the freeze response when I overbook or just have health issues.

00:38 In my past I suffered from overworking and drinking after work although I don't do that

00:43 anymore.

00:44 I still feel overworked.

00:46 I've also never taken a real two week vacation in my adult life.

00:49 How do you balance work life and stress in a healthy way?

00:52 Especially if you're the business owner.

00:54 Right.

00:55 Right, right.

00:57 This is a very philosophical question.

00:59 I mean they generally tend to be but this one in particular is very very philosophical

01:04 because this one is about what is the meaning and purpose and value of your life.

01:13 What is the meaning and purpose and value of your life?

01:18 Are you there to serve people?

01:21 Are you there at the back end call of others?

01:26 Are you like the tail of a kite being whipped around in a high storm?

01:30 Are you in a sense a kind of slave or serf?

01:34 Now this all sounds condemnatory.

01:36 I don't mean it that way at all.

01:38 Remember most of humanity evolved to be slaves and serfs.

01:42 It's hardwired into us.

01:44 It's a part of our DNA.

01:46 We have to be able to go either full master or full slave because as you know prior to

01:53 the Industrial Revolution the majority of human beings were farm implements, were slaves,

01:59 were soldiers, were serfs, were prostitutes, were concubines, were forced wives and mothers.

02:08 So to be a slave is to be defined by the needs and preferences and threats and bribes of

02:17 others.

02:19 What do you live for?

02:21 What does a slave live for?

02:24 A slave lives for the reality of work, the reproduction of enslavement and the vague

02:30 hope of freedom usually after death.

02:34 So when I say slave of course it sounds negative, "Oh you're a slave" but we have that tendency

02:41 and that's baked into a lot of people's parenting.

02:43 It's baked into a lot of people's parenting, how they parent, how they are parented, how

02:47 they relate to others and of course you know the entire school system is designed to push

02:51 out meek, broken, submissive and panicked workers and soldiers.

02:58 Now we have less need for soldiers so we throw them into the endless fires of the ideological

03:02 wars instead.

03:04 So what is the meaning and purpose of your life?

03:08 And this is the kind of thing like to have a meaning and purpose of your life is to be

03:13 the ultimate aristocrat.

03:14 Right?

03:15 Do you understand?

03:17 To have meaning and purpose.

03:19 Think of Marcus Aurelius or Seneca or think of the ancient historians Hippocrates and

03:26 think of all the people throughout history.

03:30 How many of them got to define their own meaning and purpose?

03:36 And I don't mean subjectively, I mean at all.

03:40 How many people throughout the course of human history got to define their own meaning and

03:47 their own purpose?

03:48 I mean almost none.

03:51 If you were born a king or a queen you sure as heck didn't get to define your own meaning

03:56 and purpose.

03:57 Right?

03:58 To be a slave which is again hard-baked, hard-wired into us for evolutionary and survival purposes

04:07 like 90% of populations in many areas were slaves.

04:11 A slave lives in fear and for scraps.

04:15 Right?

04:16 The slave lives in fear of being beaten and in the hopes that perhaps a small crumb of

04:22 cheesecake might be left on the plate he's taking out to the kitchen.

04:25 I mean when I worked in a restaurant and I was hungry, well we don't have to get into

04:29 all of the details.

04:31 So what are you living for?

04:33 Now in this conversation we aim to have a definition of life and purpose that is not

04:40 reactive.

04:41 It's not reactive.

04:45 You are not here to simply respond to the needs and preferences and goals and desires

04:52 and aggressions and bribes and punishments of others.

04:55 "Oh I could get that promotion!

04:57 I'm going to do X, Y, and Z.

04:59 Oh I don't want to get fired.

05:00 I got to do X, Y, and Z."

05:02 Define your own that comes from outside.

05:04 "Oh I want to buy a new Xbox so I got to save my money."

05:08 And that's your preference but it's something that comes from outside.

05:10 It's material and there's nothing wrong with material.

05:13 Of course, right?

05:14 We need food, we need water, we need entertainment but all of that is hamster in a wheel, stimulus

05:18 response stuff.

05:20 The purpose of philosophy is to say "Whoa!

05:22 Slow the F down.

05:26 Slow down.

05:27 Let's take a big look at our life.

05:30 Let's figure out what are we going to be defined by, what legacy do we want, what purpose is

05:38 the most noble for our souls."

05:42 I mean I ask myself this of course on a fairly regular basis.

05:45 How much of my life am I living in reaction?

05:49 I mean some of this happens.

05:51 I was going to go for a walk and talk today in the woods but it was snowing pretty heavily

05:56 and I was concerned that snow would land and seep onto the microphones and wreck them or

06:01 garble them or something like that so I ended up going to do a chapter of Peaceful Parenting

06:08 which of course I had promised to do at least two chapters as a whole before Christmas.

06:13 So it's a little Christmas present, some really great stuff and I did that as a video.

06:18 So some of that's reactive and I have a little bit of time now.

06:22 My family is out Christmas shopping and I'll meet them for dinner later.

06:26 I have a little bit of time now and I had an option to do anything.

06:32 I could go exercise except I've been exercising pretty hard lately and I think a day off is

06:36 probably for the best.

06:37 I could go for the walk and talk but it's kind of gray and dark out and I wasn't sure

06:42 whether the light would be any good or I'm just like a monochromatic half shadow among

06:47 the tree branches.

06:49 I could put my feet up and read, reading an interesting book on the Salem witch trials

06:55 but I wanted to do this because other than love of family and friends nothing brings

07:03 me to life like philosophy.

07:06 Nothing means as much to me, I hope of course to the world and in this case to you.

07:13 So you're living in stress slave reactive mode.

07:17 Now why are you doing that?

07:18 I'm sure it's through no personal fault of your own.

07:21 It's just how you were raised.

07:24 It's how I was raised.

07:26 I have an aristocratic nature, was born into the most pathetically humble of circumstances.

07:32 It feels like since Oliver Twist.

07:35 So when I was a kid, for most of us and certainly for me, everything was just reactive.

07:42 I had school assignments, I had a boarding school I had to go to, I was yeeted all over

07:46 the place visiting places, parents and so on.

07:51 I had to react to my mother's violence and plan for that and attempt to assuage that.

07:58 It was just reactive.

08:00 You have this conveyor belt of things that are coming your way and that's always going

08:05 to be the case in life to some degree but there's this conveyor belt of things coming

08:09 your way which you manage and deal with and do.

08:12 But our lives become satisfying rather than fear, management and desire pursuit.

08:20 "I'm afraid I'm going to be alone.

08:22 Oh I got to go somewhere now.

08:23 Oh I really like that girl.

08:24 I'm going to ask her out."

08:26 And again that's stimulus outside.

08:29 But how much of your life is chosen according to virtue?

08:37 How much of your life is chosen according to you?

08:42 I was thinking about dodgeball.

08:45 We called it murder ball but I guess that was too honest.

08:48 Dodgeball right?

08:49 So dodgeball, some kid and I remember playing when I was in grade 8 and grade 9 when some

08:56 kids didn't seem to have hit puberty at all and other kids could pick up basketballs with

09:01 one hand and needed to shave the backs of their fingers.

09:04 And I remember there was this one giant kid picked up the ball and whenever that kid had

09:08 the ball man you'd hide behind a girl guide in order to avoid it because he was just psycho,

09:13 huge, strong.

09:14 He was basically Civil War cannon fire.

09:17 It wasn't even a game anymore.

09:18 It was just survival.

09:20 So when that big, I can't even call him a kid, when that testosterone monster got the

09:27 ball everybody fled except a couple of the stoner kids who didn't really seem to process

09:34 much about what was going on.

09:36 But yeah, everyone fled.

09:39 So that's reactive right?

09:40 You're not sitting there thinking about meaning or depth or purpose or passion or a legacy

09:45 or anything like that.

09:46 You're just like I hope I don't end up in the nurse's office or the hospital from that

09:50 ball taken off my nads right?

09:53 So that's reactive.

09:55 And you know it's worth looking over the course of your life and say okay, whoever encouraged

09:59 you to pursue that which was most deep, important, powerful and meaningful for you.

10:05 Whoever did that.

10:06 Whoever said well what do you want to do?

10:09 What's most important, deep, powerful and meaningful for you?

10:11 What do you think would give you the greatest life satisfaction?

10:14 What would give you the greatest self-respect?

10:16 I mean most times what we do as kids is we're just like pinballs bouncing from one need

10:22 to punishment to hope to assignment to homework to threat to like boom boom boom right?

10:28 And then the hormones kick in and we're just booted all around by nature right?

10:34 It's pretty horrible.

10:36 And it was absolutely needed for us to survive as a whole as slaves.

10:42 You've got to take that deep breath you know life is hurly-burly right?

10:46 Hurly-burly.

10:47 It's a play, a line from a Queen song.

10:49 It's in Shakespeare, from Shakespeare I think.

10:51 The hurly-burly.

10:52 It's chaos and reaction and I think all these people lining up to buy some new phone and

10:59 the new phone's coming out and line up all night.

11:01 It's a new phone, it's reactive.

11:03 And again there's always going to be some of that but you got to try and find a space

11:07 and say okay what's it for?

11:10 What's my life for?

11:12 Is it for others?

11:13 Is it for minimizing pain and pursuing pleasure?

11:18 Is it for virtue?

11:21 Or is it for productivity?

11:24 Am I a moneymaker or a meaning maker?

11:28 And again nothing wrong with money and this is... that's going to happen anyway.

11:33 You know people who tell you to change your breathing like the Wim Hof stuff.

11:36 People who tell you to change your breathing already acknowledge that you breathe anyway

11:40 right?

11:41 They don't need to keep... you need to change your breathing.

11:42 Now of course I understand that you still breathe so when I breathe anyway so when I

11:45 say you know well this am I a moneymaker or a meaning maker?

11:49 The whole point is not then to abandon any kind of moneymaking because you need to live

11:52 right?

11:53 To consume we need to produce but we pursue this animal level of stimulus response and

12:01 punishment avoidance and pleasure pursuing and so on and we lose track of our meaning

12:07 our purpose.

12:08 Oh you know most times of course we're never even really allowed to develop it right?

12:12 So let's... the reason I'm saying all of this, struggling to stay motivated in my business.

12:16 Okay what's your motivation for your business?

12:19 What's your motivation for your business?

12:22 And growing out of childhood means very fundamentally defining your life on your own terms.

12:31 Not subjectively.

12:32 You can't just make things up.

12:34 I can't say well I'm going to set fire to fences and call it morality right?

12:39 I can't just make things up.

12:41 But it is about not reacting only.

12:45 Again there'll be some reacting.

12:47 There'll be some reacting for sure but as little as possible.

12:52 How much of my life is defined by what I want and choose and prefer and have defined for

12:59 myself?

13:00 Now the stimulus response means that yes there's going to be a bunch of stuff out there that

13:05 is going to be tempting for you to be distracted by, to be absolved by, to be absorbed by.

13:11 Going beyond the pleasure pain principle to the philosophy principle is essential for

13:18 life satisfaction.

13:20 For us to be men and women we have to do that which only men and women can do.

13:29 Otherwise we're not men or women.

13:31 We're not human beings.

13:33 And what is it that only we can do that no other creature or thing can do?

13:38 Well define abstract meaning values virtues and purpose.

13:42 Go against the pleasure pain principle towards the meaning virtue principles.

13:49 So and read this again with that background hopefully this is helpful.

13:53 You say I'm someone who is struggling to stay motivated in my business.

13:57 I own a small contracting business where I do estimates provide services based on a monthly

14:02 subscription and also provide installations.

14:05 The work is very rewarding but some days I struggle to even get out of bed.

14:10 My guess is I don't know obviously but my guess would be the days that you struggle

14:13 to get out of bed are the days when the pleasure pain principle is not enough to motivate you.

14:23 You know maybe you've made some money for the month and you don't actually absolutely

14:26 have to.

14:28 Maybe there's no one yelling at you that you've got got to get things done or they're going

14:31 to sue or you know whatever might be happening.

14:33 Because the pleasure pain principle is start stop right.

14:41 Meaning is continuous but pleasure pain is kind of like food right it's start stop you

14:46 don't eat all day.

14:47 You eat you're full hopefully you stop eating you get hungry eat some more.

14:52 You don't sleep all day you get tired go to bed you sleep you wake up and go on with your

14:56 day start your day.

14:59 So when you look at things that are real roller coaster up and down up and down I want I don't

15:04 want I like I don't like.

15:06 This could be work ambition relationships a desire for like maybe you're learning the

15:12 piano and it just kind of comes and goes starts and stops.

15:15 Well that's because you're operating on the pleasure pain principle and the pleasure pain

15:18 principle is self-limiting right.

15:22 You have a headache you take aspirin headache goes away you're done right.

15:29 You don't keep taking aspirin at least not for the headache right.

15:33 So if you have this up and down stuff the pleasure pain principle the slave principle

15:40 what does a slave do when he's not ordered to get out of bed?

15:45 He stays in bed.

15:47 Think of the beginning of one day in the life of Ivan Denisovich by a Solzhenitsyn right.

15:52 He just he spends the whole morning desperately trying to get out of having to go on his work

15:59 detail.

16:00 So he says I'm having the freeze response when I overbook or just have health issues.

16:05 Now of course my sympathy for the health issues maybe they're related to stress I don't know

16:08 of course I'm no doctor.

16:10 So when you overbook so why do you overbook?

16:13 You overbook because you feel great anxiety in saying no.

16:18 Now you understand that the slave mentality which again we all have the slave mentality

16:25 will give you great fear at saying no.

16:29 Your master orders you to go and gather wood in the forest if you say no I don't really

16:33 feel like it you're going to get beaten.

16:36 So you overbook because it's hard to say no and you also have a scarcity mindset.

16:42 And again scarcity mindset is great you know you need food for the winter you got to store

16:46 it up in the summer and fall.

16:49 But the scarcity mindset is well I can't say no to anything because maybe I'll never work

16:53 again and recognizing that you'll be fine in the future okay to say no and that you

17:02 have to evaluate and not just react.

17:04 So a lot of small business owners and I've been there right if somebody says I want to

17:10 hire you for something or to pay you for something you say yes you don't say no because what

17:17 is your purpose?

17:18 Well your purpose is to serve people make money allay anxiety and so on right.

17:25 Says in my past I suffered from overworking and drinking after work although I don't do

17:28 that anymore I still feel overworked.

17:31 Well you are overworked and slaves are overworked right.

17:34 That's the buy and burn mentality they have for software engineers.

17:37 Slaves are overworked of course.

17:40 What is it for?

17:42 Why are you doing it?

17:45 I mean obviously the ideal is to get to a place where you don't have to work and do

17:49 what you love and it's obviously fine to make those sacrifices in order to get in that direction

17:54 or go in that way.

17:56 What's your business for?

17:58 If you enjoy helping people out with their installations if you enjoy giving people heat

18:03 in the winter and cool in the summer and whatever it is that you're doing contracting if you

18:07 find that meaningful and valuable and helpful good then guard it.

18:12 When you like something when you love something you absolutely must guard your pleasure in

18:17 doing that thing.

18:19 You absolutely must guard your pleasure in doing that thing which means don't overwork.

18:25 If I said my gosh I have to do 16 hours of philosophy a day I have a limited time on

18:31 this planet I have a good brain for this it's desperately needed by society I have to do

18:36 16 hours 18 hours 20 hours of philosophy every day how quickly would it how quickly would

18:42 I get burned out?

18:45 I mean it's an overused analogy but it's worth remembering right this is a marathon not a

18:50 sprint and you have to pace yourself because you probably won't be long for your career

18:58 or the world or health I mean stress is really really tough on health.

19:02 You got to pace yourself.

19:08 Not doing is doing more not doing is doing more because if you try and do everything

19:15 all at once just think about I mean here's a silly example right so let's say you're

19:20 starting a workout program right and you say well I'm gonna start and I'm gonna do you

19:25 know however many reps you know 20 reps or whatever and then you say well you know over

19:30 the course of a month that's like 200 reps so I'll just do 200 reps when I start now

19:36 of course you'll work to failure you'll work past failure you'll work to injury right doing

19:42 less is doing longer if you try and do everything all at once you'll burn out you'll injure

19:46 yourself you'll get sick and you do it less I will get more philosophy done by doing less

19:52 philosophy every day right rest days off days recharge days if you're training for a marathon

20:01 you don't just wake up sprint all day and then collapse because you're just injure yourself

20:07 so you don't I mean maybe for half the day you'll run more but then you won't run for

20:12 two weeks because you pulled all your muscles but being able to say no is really tough because

20:17 we grow up in an environment where we can't say no I mean the government spends our money

20:23 on our behalf our children's money on their behalf teachers tell us what to do or punish

20:27 us bosses tell us what to do when we're young or punish us parents tell us what to do and

20:34 punish us right so we just react react react what are you doing it for and you don't have

20:40 an answer for that it sounds like because when you have an answer for that you have

20:45 a consistency never taken a real two-week vacation in my adult life right because slaves

20:51 don't take vacations right if you look at everything you're doing everything you're

20:54 doing is entirely congruent with the mentality of a slave and please please again I want

21:00 to reiterate this I'm not calling you a slave I'm not insulting you we all have this mindset

21:04 it was essential for our survival so what are you doing it all for well I got to make

21:10 money there's lots of ways to make money and if you really want to make money burning yourself

21:14 out is not the right way to do it right like if if I want to train for a marathon and what

21:20 I do is I just I run for I don't know 16 hours straight or something and say well I really

21:25 want to train for the marathon people would say well that's not how you train for a marathon

21:29 that's just how you injure yourself so you're not training for a marathon you're just injuring

21:32 yourself you say well I got to work to make money well burning yourself out ain't gonna

21:35 make you much money right you're gonna burn out you're gonna pull a muscle you're gonna

21:39 get really depressed you're gonna get sick right now a slave doesn't get to choose his

21:46 own rest a slave rests in scraps and bits wherever he can right and you have a slave

21:54 driver in your head as we all do as we all do and if you want to call in about that call

22:01 in at freedomain.com but that slave mentality is really important to get up and define what

22:08 your life is about what the purpose of your life is what the value of your life is what

22:12 you can choose without the ability to say no you have zero functional free will I mean

22:20 you live in the richest society the world has ever seen you get to define your own business

22:27 your own job and you can't even take a vacation you know in the Middle Ages the serfs in Spain

22:34 had five months of holidays a year and you can't take a two-week vacation while being

22:39 infinitely richer than they could ever dream of being able to say no establishes you as

22:46 an independent soul with free will and the feeling of course that if we are not present

22:53 we will be forgotten if we're not in people's faces they will just forget about us and you

22:58 can think of tons of people who've taken long breaks from their careers and come back roaring

23:01 and they've been fine right so how do you balance work life and stress in a healthy

23:07 way you have to figure out what it's all for what are you working for what is your job

23:13 for what is your life for what is your day for my day today was to hang out with my family

23:18 do a peaceful parenting reading chat with some listeners publish it all I took a little

23:25 rest so it's kind of tired the peaceful parenting book is tough it's tough man it's tough to

23:31 muscle and wrestle through it really is and have a little bit of time before I go meet

23:36 my family for dinner so I'm doing some of this it's all a choice there are staff yes

23:40 but you know you work from home and blah blah blah I think I get that I get that but part

23:45 of the reason why I get to do this is because I defined my life as being this as wanting

23:52 this as pursuing this didn't just react right okay I mean sorry just if you still wanted

23:58 me to do politics right I say no to politics I didn't want to do politics anymore and I

24:03 know a lot of you want me to keep doing politics or want me to go back on Twitter X or whatever

24:07 I get all of that but I mean I'm free to say no and it's a healthy thing isn't it if I

24:12 don't want to do it and I have I think some good reasons for not wanting to do it or not

24:17 feeling like it's the right thing to do so I can I can say no and if I let people pressure

24:23 me to do it I'd be surrendering my free will and modeling dysfunctional behavior for others

24:28 right so not a good thing all right next question have you thought about compiling all your

24:33 podcasts and books into a hard drive and selling that to the viewers for 50 to 100 bucks so

24:37 that if the internet goes down or whatever whatever your work will be stored in different

24:41 sites of the world I have thought of that kind of stuff and we have done that kind of

24:48 stuff in the past I had a whole merch shop many many years ago but the sales really weren't

24:53 worth it and so I protect let me tell you something it's a little secret here right

25:00 it's important if you're a business owner too I really really work to protect my love

25:05 of the audience because I do love you guys you guys have given me the greatest life ever

25:10 and I really really thank you for it so I try not to do stuff that's going to give me

25:13 a negative view of the audience and I sort of remember way back in the day there were

25:17 I don't know a lot of people saying hey man get merch get merch do merch do merch I'd

25:21 love to buy it and then I spent a lot of time and energy creating a merch shop and then

25:26 like nobody bought and that was just annoying right so I try to avoid things which are going

25:31 to give me a negative view of the audience when they're not particularly necessary all

25:35 right what are cold feet why do some people want to move across the continent or across

25:42 the world no matter how many times they do it what is the addiction to travel okay so

25:47 let's do these one at a time cold feet so cold feet is your body screaming at you to

25:52 not do something right so you you know this standard story right it's a standard story

25:57 that a woman is is is getting married or a man is getting married and they get really

26:02 nervous they can't sleep and they're scared to do it right and their friend says oh no

26:07 you do you're just getting cold feet you're just nervous about change you know it goes

26:10 everybody does it happens to everyone don't don't worry about it it's fine you'll be okay

26:15 and they just talk them into into doing it right but it's I mean I remember when I was

26:23 getting married I looked forward to the marriage I loved the day after marriage I loved getting

26:30 married I loved everything about it I loved and I remember we went on our honeymoon and

26:37 the place we went was pretty brutally cold we were looking at bailing and flying somewhere

26:41 else and all of that but I remember we had as part of our package we had dinner on the

26:47 beach and it was really windy and cold the sand was blowing in their faces and I have

26:52 a picture of my wife just laughing when all of this these sorts of catastrophes were going

26:57 on we were just happy to be with each other so and I've never had even the briefest of

27:04 moments doubt about the happiness and value and virtue of the marriage like not even a

27:12 smidge of a moment ever since now I'm not saying this to brag I'm just saying that you

27:16 know whereas I did feel nervous about the woman I was gonna marry but then didn't marry

27:20 that seemed like that was pretty nervous about that and rightly so so I think that cold feet

27:25 is your gut right because sometimes it feels in life this is sort of hearkening back to

27:31 the first guy's question doesn't it sometimes feel in life like you're just on this kind

27:35 of conveyor belt I said remember feeling that when I was younger you're just kind of on

27:38 this conveyor belt you know you go from class to class to bell rings go to another class

27:42 go hang with your friends go home do some homework go to job you just on this conveyor

27:45 belt like a train track right just moving along maybe there's a couple of switches you

27:50 go left or right but you're kind of on this conveyor belt and people I think sometimes

27:55 that conveyor belt is includes like well I met this girl and we've been dating for a

27:59 certain amount of time I guess we got to get married she seemed to want to get married

28:02 so let's get married you're just on this conveyor belt and then yeah she wants some kids and

28:06 wow she wants to buy a big house or what just this conveyor belt and I don't maybe the conveyor

28:13 belt to the train tracks is the wrong analogy it's kind of like a meat carcass on a sky

28:18 hook just going along a monorail thing right just back and forth over and over right so

28:24 cold feet is we're not choosing it we're not choosing it it's just happening to us it's

28:30 just the next thing right so I think cold feet is is something which you haven't fully

28:35 chosen fully willed but it's just kind of happening to you you are resisting that because

28:39 it kind of cements you into less and less and less free will every time you refuse to

28:42 choose your choices diminish right so cold feet is stay away from the train track why

28:48 do some people want to move across the content or across the world no matter how many times

28:51 they do it what is this addiction to travel to the enjoyment of surrounding oneself as

28:56 strangers and fleeing desperately even when it's very financially irresponsible from the

29:00 familiar its effects are always feeling back at square one and being at the bottom of the

29:05 social hierarchy they reject commitment in business romance and pastime so I mean to

29:12 get at the most basic level people move because like it move historically have we evolved

29:18 we move because we're in pursuit of something or being chased by something a lot of times

29:23 when people move they are both in pursuit of something and being chased by something

29:28 the in pursuit of something is in pursuit of adventure ego gratification the casual

29:35 sex cool people cool adventures now in particular of course with rise of social media travel

29:40 has become something where it's a huge clout right it's a massive clout for people to travel

29:47 and say to everyone look how cool I'm at this waterfall in Bali and so I met this beautiful

29:51 guy and you know had an affair with my kayak instructor in Indonesia whatever it is right

29:56 and so there's this envy and and it's I mean it's fundamentally satanic right I mean because

30:00 it is saying that you can live a life of the consumption of sensation without any purpose

30:06 or build or generosity or life creating or life bringing or life giving or child raising

30:12 or devotion or sacrifice or charity or anything like that you just live a life like pac-man

30:18 just chewing on the glowing dots of stimuli like a mic on my mic on my mic on my mic

30:23 it's living at the level of an amoeba food good rock bad pursue food withdraw from rock

30:32 right stimulus response back to the pleasure pain principle so they're in pursuit of stimuli

30:40 because they're being hunted by emptiness if you live for the outside in your inside

30:46 empties out if you live for sensation your soul implodes if you live to tickle your nerve

30:55 endings your humanity disintegrates if you polish only the outside you rot forever on

31:01 the inside we can continue these analogies but I think you get the general purpose so

31:06 what happens is this is a vicious cycle that happens you pursue external stimuli at the

31:11 expense of internal virtue and your conscience rails against you which means introspection

31:19 being at peace with yourself defining meaning pursuing virtue it becomes more and more painful

31:25 in the same way that the longer you spend overeating and not exercising and the worse

31:32 your health becomes the more difficult it is to recognize that deal with that cut back

31:38 on your food start to exercise because you know when you've gone a thousand miles in

31:43 the wrong direction turning around is pretty hard right if you've been waiting for a bus

31:47 for five minutes you decide to walk that's okay if you've been waiting for the bus for

31:51 two hours and you could have walked there in half an hour you feel like an idiot you

31:55 feel bad right so people maybe they have a bad conscience or maybe they're lured in by

32:00 the satanic tickle your dopamine and that's the best life you can get right that's sort

32:06 of sex in the city stuff right we're going to parties we're sleeping with guys we're

32:11 drinking you know all this kind of stuff right there's no virtue there's no charity there's

32:16 no kindness there's no curiosity there's no children I mean the whole it's a it's a dead

32:22 universe of decaying middle-aged corpses with no families no I don't think I've even I don't

32:28 think I ever saw one child in any of those shows they don't exist the consumption of

32:33 stimuli like an amoeba is the highest calling of the soulless so they are in pursuit of

32:42 stimuli and they're being hunted by emptiness the lack of meaning living like less than

32:47 an animal I mean it's an insult to animals to say human beings are living like animals

32:52 because animals don't have the capacity to live like human beings all you're doing is

32:55 living like the opposite of a human being whatever that is right I guess that would

32:59 be the satanic definition or aspect so and again travels fun I've done my travel but

33:05 not at the expense of virtue all right what else do we have here and thanks again for

33:11 these just wonderful I was just thinking the other day like when was the last time I just

33:14 came up with something on my own it didn't just bounce off questions talk about reacting

33:18 I'm like oh yeah the whole piece of parenting book all right so ah in your talk with Dr.

33:23 Pesta let's do one more yeah you do one more in your talk with Dr. Pesta y'all y'all discussed

33:28 sacrifice in the context of the Bible this week in a Q&A you also discussed the topic

33:32 I've always seen these biblical and social concepts of sacrifice as morally incorrect

33:37 and that I don't think humans are or should be sacrificial animals I see the rant notion

33:42 that something is not a sacrifice unless you give up something you value for something

33:45 you value less as a more accurate human concept it requires you to first have to find your

33:50 values then rank them then choose with free will it seems more appropriate to describe

33:56 what parents do for their children they value continuing their genetic life more than the

34:01 other stuff they could buy or time on other pursuit yet it isn't altruistic or loss or

34:07 negative of for themselves even the example of Mother Teresa or similar elk could also

34:14 be explained this way is the act to increase their values by actions that seem altruistic

34:20 but instead are not as they are choosing the reward of those actions accolade sense of

34:25 accomplishment emotional reward of helping etc over time money or other alternatives

34:28 they could have chosen but value less I'd be interested in hearing how specifically

34:32 you define sacrifice and relate it to both the concepts of the Bible and that which Rantz

34:36 describes not so what to call the latter Rantz concept a big topic I think Christopher Hitchens

34:42 did a pretty powerful takedown of Mother Teresa and Mother Teresa would have been infinitely

34:46 more helpful to the poor if she had proposed free market economics rather than done all

34:52 of this income redistribution stuff that she was doing but even Mother Teresa said that

34:57 she does it for the Jesus in the poor not for the poor themselves right she sees Jesus

35:00 in the poor and she's doing it for Jesus so she's looking to pursue virtue and she's looking

35:05 to get to heaven fulfill Jesus's commandments and so on so it's not it's not selfless the

35:13 problem I have the sacrifice of a higher value for a lower or non value I think is the technical

35:19 term that Rand used and obviously the objectivists still use but that's kind of incomprehensible

35:27 why would you sacrifice a higher value for a lower or non value that would be incomprehensible

35:35 right so let's say there's a beautiful smart funny accomplished virtuous woman and next

35:44 to her is some monstrous tattooed blue haired psycho and you could ask both girls out they

35:53 both smiling at you and you pass by the beautiful accomplished intelligent woman and go for

35:59 the obviously dysfunctional and messed up woman right like why would you do that so

36:05 you're sacrificing a higher value of beauty intelligence wit and all that for a lower

36:09 value ugliness malevolence whatever is going on for this other woman right or somebody

36:16 offers you the job of your dreams for a million dollars a year somebody offers you the job

36:23 of your dreams for a million dollars a year and somebody else wants you to be a dishwasher

36:28 for ten dollars an hour dishwasher is the worst job I think I ever had it was just absolutely

36:35 horrible and one of the few jobs I think I lasted two or three days anyway so why would

36:41 somebody give up the job of his dreams for a million dollars a year and instead become

36:46 a dishwasher for ten dollars an hour well that would be sacrificing a higher value dream

36:50 job and good money for a lower value terrible job bad money so why would somebody do that

36:56 well the general answer as to why somebody would go past a beautiful woman to go for

37:01 the ugly woman I mean spiritually and why somebody would avoid their dream job and do

37:06 a terrible job is because they hate themselves and they believe that they need to punish themselves

37:13 or that they're bad and therefore they shouldn't have anything good in their life like you

37:17 like whatever masochism but then masochism is not putting a lower value right they're

37:23 choosing masochism which is a higher value than the great job of the beautiful woman

37:29 so the masochism so that nobody chooses a lower value right nobody chooses a lower value

37:37 everything that people choose is a reflection of what they value so if a woman has a baby

37:44 and wants to stay home with her baby but then all of her friends and relatives are all saying

37:49 oh being a stay-at-home mom is retarded and you've got to be a professional woman and

37:52 you've got to go make some money and daycare is great like and and like it's lame and you

37:58 just be a breeding cow and a broodmare like whatever vicious nihilistic antinatalist crap

38:04 that they would spew okay so let's say she then dumps her baby in daycare and goes back

38:09 to work is she choosing a lower value no she's choosing the higher value of conformity to

38:15 the insistence of everyone around her over what she deep down maybe wants to do and what

38:20 would be best for her baby so she's not choosing a lower value now we can of course say she's

38:26 choosing wrong but for her conformity with other people's pressure is a higher value

38:32 right do we do we follow I mean sorry I don't mean to be overly obvious you all are the

38:36 smartest crew in the known universe so we follow empirically whatever someone chooses

38:44 is their highest value so if somebody dates a physically beautiful but spiritually ugly

38:50 woman over a physically plain but spiritually beautiful woman then clearly he values physical

38:57 beauty over spiritual beauty he values the flesh over the virtues right now he may come

39:03 and probably will come to regret that choice but that's empirically what he values whatever

39:08 people do is empirically what they choose to do assuming they're not in a state of coercion

39:15 so when Rand says sacrificing a higher value to a lower or non value it's a little hard

39:20 to know what that means and I have to be I do have to be like for so many reasons I think

39:25 it's correct but there's also consequentialist reasons as well I absolutely forever and a

39:30 day from here to 20 minutes after I die will resist as strenuously as humanly possible

39:38 the idea that people have intentions that they prefer other than their actions I didn't

39:44 mean to that wasn't my intention well intentions are ghosts that can be used to explain anything

39:52 I remember when I was a kid I read a story that was a poem about and if anybody knows

39:57 it you can let me know but it's about a kid with an invisible friend right and the kid

40:02 says well I'll I'll need two chocolate bars because my invisible friend wants one too

40:06 I probably will end up having to eat it because his teeth are kind of new you got an invisible

40:11 friend I mean if your kid you're out of the room a vase gets smashed on the ground you

40:19 come back in your kid standing there with his hand outstretched and he says my invisible

40:22 friend did it would you believe him you'd say no listen it's not the end of the world

40:25 that you smash the vase but I really don't like that you're saying some invisible friend

40:28 did it and if we don't allow kids to have ghosts like intangible unprovable invisible

40:35 friends why would we allow adults the excuse of intentions I didn't mean to I didn't mean

40:43 to turn you on I didn't mean to whatever people choose is what they prefer and the only empirical

40:51 evidence we have is their action is their action now if you get into a fistfight with

41:01 someone and you punch them and they die you say well I didn't mean to kill him but everybody

41:07 knows that if you get involved in physical violence there's almost always a chance of

41:13 grievous injury or death I mean if I not me if someone plays Russian roulette right one

41:20 in six chance to be in the chamber right well I didn't mean to kill myself I didn't mean

41:23 to shoot right well but you're playing Russian roulette right so that's that's baked in right

41:28 I mean every gambler who goes to the casino can come out and say well I didn't mean to

41:31 lose the money is like you know but you went and gambled so that's built in so people who

41:38 risk bad outcomes and then say I didn't mean to have bad outcomes well if you didn't want

41:43 to lose the money you wouldn't have gambled the fact that you gambled knowing that you

41:47 could lose the money I don't care what you're what you meant to do is it's such a strong

41:53 defense for evil doers as well as well I didn't mean to my parents who abuse their children

41:57 well I did the best I could I didn't mean to upset you people who say obviously insulting

42:01 things and then say well I'm sorry that you got so upset I didn't mean to upset you it's

42:05 like I don't I don't care what you said I don't care what you did I only care what you

42:09 said I don't care your meaning I only care what you did I'm an empiricist I mean it sounds

42:14 tautological whatever people do they mean to do sounds tautological but it's very powerful

42:21 because it allows you to bypass the infinite well of bullshit that people erect over the

42:26 empiricism of their own actions well I did this but I didn't mean to I didn't mean to

42:32 hurt you I didn't mean to cheat I didn't mean to upset you I didn't mean to abuse you I

42:36 didn't mean it's absolute my invisible friend pushed over the lamp so whatever people choose

42:45 to do is their highest value now we can say that this is an unwise that it's not a true

42:52 highest value right so the mom who dumps her kid in daycare and goes back to work we can

42:59 say that that's not really acting in a rational objective good for your child highest value

43:05 now she would say well I want to do what's best for my kid right I mean parents say that

43:10 I just did this whole chapter in peaceful parenting so I say I want to do what's best

43:13 for my kid right so then it's just a matter of saying well objectively staying home with

43:19 your kid is best for your kid right now then when she's confronted with that she can either

43:23 say well we have to balance these things my needs are important too okay so well then

43:27 you don't want to do what's best for your kid you want to you have your needs you don't

43:30 want to so you had a child and you'd rather work than spend time with your child right

43:35 and would you accept that if your husband says let's have a monogamous marriage and

43:40 then he decides to go and sleep around he says well you know but I have my needs too

43:45 got to balance my needs with my wife's needs it's like no no no that wasn't the deal and

43:48 having a child of course is a pretty explicit well it's an implicit deal for sure right

43:54 and do what's best for the kid so we can say that people don't have the right priorities

44:02 a woman who travels and cashes in on her sex appeal and her attractiveness to get money

44:08 for men to travel around and so on we can say okay well yeah I get it man the first

44:14 you know the first 10 years of your adulthood you know I don't know 19 to 29 or 20 to 30

44:19 or 18 to 28 the first 10 years maybe even 15 years probably not 15 but the first 10

44:24 years is going to be super fun right that's going to be a blast you're going to travel

44:31 and see the world and have sex and get drunk and not have to worry about bills or right

44:37 so all the people grinding through I don't know getting educated building businesses

44:41 all the people grinding through all that stuff are looking at the person roaming around and

44:46 saying man you're having a blast you know like the guy who quits his job and lives on

44:51 credit sits by the pool and burps and watches YouTube or whatever looks like they're having

44:57 a fun of the guy who's getting up oh man I gotta get up and go to work it's cold out

45:01 and can't get the car started and this guy sitting by the pool and later in the day and

45:05 having a blast well it looks fun right yeah it all looks fun till it's not right it all

45:10 looks fun you know every now and then I'm at a restaurant and I remember this when I

45:15 was in the States some time ago I remember being a restaurant and I gotta watch what

45:23 I order right I gotta watch the calories I gotta I just gotta watch what I order so some

45:29 meat and and veggies and some water and I don't eat dessert really so every now and

45:37 then you know you go to the bakery or I remember this when I was in the States you'd see people

45:42 with these you know these giant surf and turf platters it takes four waiters like they're

45:46 carrying Milo Leonopoulos into an amphitheater the elephant back to this massive machine

45:53 the food comes with a shovel and a snorkel right and you look at you like oh man oh I

45:59 could eat that I mean I'd love once in my life to eat till I was full just never seems

46:03 to happen just I always have to will myself to stop eating because honestly could just

46:07 eat forever so it might be I do have worms on it no I didn't add a colonoscopy I'm fine

46:14 so you'd see all these people oh man I'd love to have that meal but that meal is 2,000 calories

46:19 and I can't have that meal it's bad for me bad for my digestion bad for my sleep bad

46:24 for my health bad for my weight so yeah it's I'd love to sit at that table and face-blot

46:30 in that food and then they you know they order desserts and all that that'd be nice so they

46:39 value the sensuality in the moment I value the health in the future now of course if

46:46 it's their last meal right right you know that old joke the woman on death row it's

46:52 your last meal what do you want to eat I don't know what do you want to eat so maybe it's

46:59 their last meal maybe they've got some terminal diagnosis they're gonna be dead in three months

47:05 and they don't care like I don't know I mean obviously it's not the case right but but

47:08 you know you could imagine a scenario where you wouldn't care about what you ate right

47:12 like they put the swab on that in fatal injection on death row we want to get an infection now

47:19 it's about to die so we can say look your values are not rational they're not correct

47:24 they're not good okay so we're telling them that they should reprioritize their values

47:30 so that more sensible and long-lasting and productive values end up at the top that's

47:34 great you know that makes makes good sense to me makes good sense to me but they are

47:41 still choosing their highest values they value food over health they value taste over health

47:50 now we can say they should change the value like the smoker right I wish I'd never smoked

47:55 yeah like I can certainly understand that but if you you know smoke a pack a day for

47:59 30 years say well my intention was never to get sick I never wanted lymphosema or or lung

48:04 cancer or anything like that it's like I don't know it means nothing to me like that avocado

48:11 fellow that something avocado went from being a skinny guy on YouTube to a very obese guy

48:18 and he's got these videos of him eating these like 10,000 calorie meals and so when people

48:22 say well I ate 10,000 calorie meals I never intended to get fat I'm sorry don't be the

48:29 laugh because it's deadly serious that guy's made a lot of money out of destroying his

48:33 health but I don't I don't care about the intention I don't care about what people say

48:40 they want I only care about what they do and this comes from obviously practical life experience

48:47 having a whole bunch of people say a whole bunch of nonsense about their intentions but

48:50 it also comes from a being in business running a business right running a business and oh

48:56 a big in school you can't if you miss an essay like you don't hand your essay in on time

49:01 you can't go to the teacher at least maybe you can now you couldn't when I was in school

49:04 you couldn't go to your teacher and just say well I meant to hand in the paper my intention

49:09 was to hand in the paper like I don't do I see the paper in front of me no then I don't

49:12 care what your intention was when I was involved in sales calls for a multi-million dollar

49:16 software that I'd written if somebody says I intend to buy it doesn't matter I mean it

49:22 can be helpful in a little bit of planning it can also be supremely unhelpful because

49:27 if you think you have a commitment for a big sale you tend to relax a little bit and if

49:31 that big sale doesn't materialize then you're worse off right you know if you if you think

49:37 you have a date on Friday and your date doesn't show up you could have made another date or

49:41 done something else right so I can't pay my employees with people's intentions intentions

49:50 are absolutely irrelevant intentions are invisible friends so the higher value lower value thing

49:57 I only care what people do and what they do manifest their highest values now they may

50:02 claim other values they may claim that they regret those values but what they did at the

50:07 time like a guy who keeps smoking obviously clearly by definition without a doubt the

50:13 guy who keeps smoking prefers smoking to not smoking he prefers avoiding the discomfort

50:21 of nicotine withdrawal over future health or money that he's spending on smoking or

50:28 the sports he could have done if he wasn't a smoker whatever right and that's just empirical

50:31 fact that's the reality this is what he's done and intentions you see if we take away

50:39 the excuse of intentions we help people more than can almost possibly be measured if we

50:46 take away this ghost of intentions right if you if you had a goat in your backyard and

50:52 you genuinely believe like let's say you're a smoker and you genuinely believed that all

50:58 the damage from smoking went into the lungs of the goat and not you right would you be

51:05 more or less likely to keep smoking well of course you'd be much more likely to keep smoking

51:11 if you genuinely believe that all the damage from your cigarettes went into the lungs of

51:15 the goat and not you you just goat dies of lung cancer just buy another goat and all

51:20 this so if people have intentions as an excuse this intentions I don't mean to overuse the

51:27 term satanic but they have a satanic element to them in that they create the slippery slope

51:33 down to hell itself right so if people can just do bad things and then say well I didn't

51:38 mean to it wasn't my intention if we take away that excuse we're taking away the goat

51:46 so the guy has to quit smoking or at least he has a more he's more likely to quit smoking

51:50 if he knows that if he doesn't any longer have the fantasy that the goats taken all

51:54 the smoking damage right so with regards to higher lower values we can say to people your

52:01 values are not being served by your actions right so if a smoker says I want to be healthy

52:07 you say well smoking doesn't serve that right if you keep smoking and he says I want to

52:11 be healthy what we'll say no you don't right the two big defenses one is intentions the

52:17 other is I don't remember I don't recall I got no memory of anything at all right these

52:22 are the two big defenses intentions and forgetfulness and I mean you've heard this a million times

52:28 in my call-in shows I don't accept either of those defenses and that's why we are so

52:32 productive right just don't accept people's nonsense and you can get to the truth very

52:35 quickly all you have to do is not accept nonsense and you get to the truth in about 10 minutes

52:40 maybe not even less often so if people claim an intention that is opposite of their actions

52:52 the intention is the action everything else is nonsense and we shouldn't let people spout

52:58 the such nonsense both because we value the truth and empiricism is the truth and also

53:03 because we don't want to encourage or enable bad behavior under the cover of intentions

53:12 forgetfulness just by the way right now you can ask your parents something about the past

53:17 and they'll remember and then you ask them about abuse if they were abusive and they

53:21 don't remember then that's you know and I have so much evidence for this right I mean

53:27 really unique in this kind of way and that I've had well over a thousand conversations

53:31 with people about this sort of deep history and personal issues and way back to when they

53:36 were little little kids and every time they say I don't know and I say yes you do oh look

53:43 they know right so I know that that's the defense now of course if somebody doesn't

53:47 remember what happened when they were two right that's probably a pretty real thing

53:50 but when people claim they don't know something like let's say they've lived with their mother

53:56 or they've known their mother for like 35 years and they claim they don't know why she

53:59 does something it's like well yes you do yeah you do otherwise knowledge about people is

54:03 impossible because you can't figure anyone out after spending 35 years cheek by jowl

54:07 with them then no knowledge about human beings is possible and you can't ever have a relationship

54:11 with anyone because right can't figure out anything about anyone even if 35 years exposure

54:15 so so I maybe it sounds like a bit of a tangent to go on this intention tirade but nobody

54:22 sacrifices a higher value to a lower value and I would not accept that as an excuse from

54:29 someone because ignorance of the law is no excuse so if somebody says well I want to

54:36 be healthy and then they never study what it takes to be healthy if they say I want

54:42 to lose weight but they never study the human mechanics by which people lose weight then

54:46 they don't want to lose weight and I don't like to give people stand-ins for virtue I

54:52 don't like to give them substitutes for virtue intention is a substitute for virtue if you

54:56 act in ways that hurt people you say well like I never meant to hurt that person I didn't

55:01 mean to it wasn't my intention to hurt that person I don't care you hurt that person and

55:06 I'm not going to give you the stand-in for an excuse or a virtue called intention you

55:11 did hurt that hurt that person and the more you make excuses for it by claiming intention

55:15 the more likely you are to hurt that person again right I mean if I was play wrestling

55:20 with my daughter and I hurt her in some manner well of course I didn't mean to but I did

55:26 and that's what matters and I got to change my behavior to address and fix that right

55:32 so yeah the higher to lower value there is no sacrifice the only thing that ever gets

55:36 sacrificed is the truth people avoid the truth in order to maintain the illusion of their

55:40 own virtue and wisdom but that's because they prefer to do that so anyway I hope that helps

55:46 thank you everyone so much for listening for supporting free domain dot com slash donate

55:51 free domain dot com slash donate if you could help me out particularly for this gorgeous

55:56 lovely Christmas season I would very very much appreciate it and I hope you're all having

56:00 a wonderful wonderful holiday season and lots of love from up here I'll talk to you soon

WHAT IS THE MEANING OF YOUR LIFE?

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