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00:00 Let me ask you a question.
00:01 When you lie,
00:04 who do you think you lie to the most?
00:10 Can we just go ahead and start the year
00:13 and get ridiculously honest?
00:15 How many of you lie?
00:16 Raise your hands.
00:17 Go ahead and leave them up, leave them up,
00:18 go ahead and leave them up.
00:19 Look to the person who's not raising her hand right now
00:21 and just call them a liar, right?
00:22 Just call them a liar.
00:24 Yeah, we all lie.
00:26 When you lie, who do you lie to the most?
00:31 How many of you would be honest and say
00:33 that you've lied to your boss before?
00:35 Anybody ever lied to your boss?
00:36 Okay, I'm looking for my staff right now.
00:38 I'm looking for my staff.
00:40 You know, it's a beautiful day out.
00:42 No, I'm not feeling well.
00:44 You know, I gotta stay home.
00:46 I got a headache.
00:47 It's a beautiful day.
00:48 You lied to your boss.
00:49 How many of you have ever lied to your kids?
00:52 Anybody lie to your kids?
00:53 Boy, I do.
00:54 They ask me, "Can we do this?"
00:56 And I'm like, "Oh, we'll think about it.
00:58 "I'll think about it."
00:59 Ain't no way we're doing that.
01:00 I'm just stalling.
01:02 How many of you ever lied to your parents?
01:06 I'm looking at my kids right now
01:08 and their hands just went up, right?
01:10 It wasn't me, it wasn't me, I promise.
01:12 How many of you have ever lied to your friends?
01:13 Raise your hands, raise your hands, yeah.
01:15 Like, "Yeah, I wish I could help you move on Saturday,
01:19 "but I got a lot going that day."
01:22 Anybody ever lie kind of on social media?
01:26 You post something that's not exactly true?
01:28 Like, "My life is blessed and perfect and happy,
01:31 "and it's amazing, and it really sucks.
01:33 "I'm depressed and I wanna die right now."
01:35 Anybody ever do that?
01:37 It's interesting when you think about the lies that we tell.
01:42 Who do you think you lied to the most?
01:45 It may surprise you, but the research is conclusive.
01:51 The person you lie to the most is you.
01:55 The person that you lie to the most is actually you.
02:01 In fact, experts say that we will lie dozens
02:05 to literally hundreds of times
02:09 every single day to ourselves.
02:14 We'll tell ourselves, "I'll do it tomorrow,"
02:17 when you know you won't.
02:20 We tell ourselves, "I can stop at any time,"
02:23 when you really can't.
02:25 We tell ourselves, "I'm fine, I'm fine, I'm fine,"
02:28 when you're not fine at all.
02:30 You tell yourself, "I don't care at all what they think,"
02:35 but you really do.
02:37 And we tell ourselves, "It's not really that big of a deal,"
02:41 when it's really a big deal.
02:43 Studies show that the one that you lie to the most
02:48 is actually yourself.
02:51 In fact, Jeremiah 17, nine tells us something
02:54 very important to understand,
02:55 that the human heart is the most deceitful of all things
03:00 and desperately wicked.
03:04 Who really knows how bad it is?
03:07 The unredeemed heart has the capacity
03:12 to not only lie to others,
03:15 but to completely deceive yourself.
03:18 And that is one of the major reasons
03:22 why most of the New Year's resolutions that you have
03:26 and you're so excited about right now
03:29 are likely going to fail.
03:31 And the reason is, with very good intention,
03:35 you're focusing on some external behavior,
03:39 you're focusing on something that you do on the outside.
03:43 You wanna, whatever it is, you wanna get more organized,
03:46 or you wanna get up earlier,
03:48 or you wanna stop being on social media so much,
03:51 or you want to stop looking at things you shouldn't look at,
03:53 you wanna eat better, you wanna save more money,
03:55 whatever it is, you wanna stop yelling at your spouse.
03:58 The problem is, you're simply focused on external behaviors,
04:03 but where are behaviors actually born?
04:06 Our behaviors are born in our hearts.
04:11 So as I've always said, if you wanna change your life,
04:14 change your habits, but if you wanna change your habits,
04:19 let God change your heart.
04:25 This year, we're not starting on the outside,
04:28 we're starting on the inside,
04:30 and we're gonna ask God to change our hearts.
04:33 Today, we're beginning a new message series,
04:35 I'm calling it Habits of a Healthy Heart,
04:38 and I wanna show you where we're gonna go
04:39 over the next few weeks.
04:40 We're gonna look at five different habits of the heart.
04:43 Today, we're gonna look at the habit of self-examination,
04:48 to give a very true, very sincere, very honest look
04:53 at our own lives and give God permission
04:55 to work in our lives.
04:56 Next week, we're gonna look at the habit of simplicity.
05:00 Almost all of us are looking for more, more, more, more,
05:02 more, when actually less is often more.
05:04 The third week, we're gonna look at the habit of solitude,
05:07 of slowing our lives down to be quiet before God,
05:11 to genuinely seek Him in His Word
05:14 and to hear His voice that will direct our steps.
05:17 Then we're gonna look at the habit of sorrow.
05:20 You say, "But I don't want to be sorrowful."
05:24 We actually are gonna discover in Scripture
05:25 that the habit of sorrow is very powerful,
05:28 worldly sorrow that leads to death, and we don't want that.
05:31 But there is such a thing as godly sorrow
05:34 that brings us to repentance
05:36 and leads us to salvation and to life.
05:39 And the final week, we're gonna look at the habit
05:41 of slowing, I may skip that week
05:43 or actually delegate it to someone else,
05:45 but in a world where we're actually very, very fast-paced
05:48 all the time, we're gonna learn to take a day off
05:52 to honor God with the Sabbath, to slow our lives down
05:55 in a way that would truly be God honoring.
05:58 Today, what I wanna do as we launch into a new year
06:01 is I wanna talk about the habit of self-examination.
06:05 And God's Word tells us this in Psalm 139.
06:09 It was David who prayed this prayer.
06:11 He said, "Search me."
06:13 Somebody say, "Search me."
06:15 He said, "Search me, God, and know my heart,"
06:20 because my heart is actually very deceitful.
06:22 It's deceitful above all things.
06:24 He said, "Test me and know my anxious thoughts.
06:29 "God, see if there is any offensive way in me
06:35 "and lead me in the way everlasting."
06:39 What I'd love today at all of our churches,
06:42 if you wouldn't mind just saying this aloud,
06:44 kind of quietly, almost as a prayer,
06:46 where you sit today online, you can do the same thing.
06:48 Just say it aloud.
06:50 "Search me, God, and know my heart.
06:55 "Test me and know my anxious thoughts.
06:59 "See if there is any offensive way in me
07:03 "and lead me in the way everlasting.
07:07 "Search me, God, and know my heart.
07:10 "Test me.
07:12 "See if there's any offensive way in me."
07:15 This was a prayer of David.
07:18 And why do you think David prayed this prayer?
07:22 If you watch his life, you'll discover that over time,
07:26 David started to understand the same thing
07:29 that I hope that you'll understand.
07:31 He started to understand his propensity to lie to himself.
07:36 He was the master, just as all of us are,
07:40 the master of self-deception.
07:42 And he started to discover this later on in his life
07:45 after what happened in 2 Samuel 11, one.
07:48 Let me show you what this pivotal moment is like.
07:51 Scripture says, "In the spring of the year
07:53 "when kings normally go out to war,"
07:55 so he was the king, he should have been at war,
07:58 but he wasn't at war.
07:59 "David instead sent Joab and the Israelite army
08:03 "to fight the Amorites.
08:04 "However," what did David do?
08:06 He wasn't at war, what did he do?
08:08 David stayed behind in Jerusalem.
08:11 What was going on in his own mind?
08:14 He was actually deceiving himself.
08:16 We don't know exactly what he thought,
08:18 but I'm gonna kind of just read into it a little bit.
08:20 He probably thought, okay, this is the time
08:22 when kings go off to war, but I've been at war quite a bit.
08:27 I've been fighting, everybody knows I'm kind of a war hero.
08:30 I am the king, it's dangerous when I go out.
08:33 I've fought enough, I actually deserve a break.
08:36 It's probably better if I sit this one out,
08:38 take care of myself and keep myself safe.
08:41 After all, I am the king and I have proved my worthiness
08:44 on the battlefield, and so he's probably telling him
08:46 something like this.
08:47 And then at some point, he thinks, hey, I wanna relax,
08:49 so maybe I'm gonna go have a little drink
08:51 on the roof of my house and watch the sun set.
08:54 And when he does, he looks across
08:56 and he sees a woman taking a bath.
08:58 And he looks at her, the Hebrew word that is used
09:01 is the word ra-ah, which is pronounced this way.
09:04 Ra-ah.
09:05 That's how he looked at her,
09:11 because what it means is to look and to keep looking.
09:14 So he saw this woman taking a bath and he ra-ah-ed her.
09:17 He looked at her, he stared at her.
09:19 And he probably thought to himself, hey, I'm not doing
09:22 anything, I'm just kind of looking,
09:23 it's not that really big of a deal.
09:24 And then somewhere in his mind, he deceived himself again
09:27 and said, hey, you know, I have been going kind of hard
09:30 and some companionship would be good.
09:31 So he sent one of his men to go and bring her to his place.
09:35 And she comes to the palace and he probably thinks
09:37 we're just gonna spend some time together.
09:39 We're just gonna talk about her life and the kingdom
09:41 and what it's like to be the king.
09:43 And one thing led to another, who knows,
09:45 maybe he brushed up against her, maybe he said,
09:48 hey, can I give you a back rub, whatever it is.
09:50 One step after another, he rationalized his sinfulness
09:54 and he ended up having sex with her.
09:58 If you know the story, she ends up being pregnant
10:01 and he finds himself in a really, really bad place.
10:04 What am I gonna do now?
10:05 And so in his mind, he's thinking, well,
10:07 I gotta cover this up and so I'm gonna call her husband,
10:11 Uriah, home and I'm gonna give him a chance
10:14 to be with his wife so then he'll think the baby's his.
10:18 And Uriah comes home, but he's too loyal of a soldier
10:23 so he says, I'm not gonna be with my wife,
10:25 I'm gonna stay with my men and so that doesn't work.
10:28 So David's like, well, I've gotta protect my name
10:31 and I've gotta protect the kingdom,
10:32 whatever he's thinking, he's telling himself
10:33 and I've gotta protect the name of God
10:35 and so he says to his wife, put Uriah, her husband,
10:38 out on the front lines and sure enough,
10:40 Uriah loses his life.
10:43 Looking back, step by step by step,
10:47 he would have rationalized his own sin
10:50 and the whole time thinking what he was doing
10:53 wasn't a big deal, but what exactly did he do?
10:56 He abused his power, he violated an innocent woman, Bathsheba,
11:02 he committed the sin of adultery,
11:05 he wrecked an entire family,
11:08 he essentially murdered Uriah,
11:11 then when the baby was born,
11:13 the consequences evidently led the baby to get sick and die
11:16 and step by step by step, sin by sin by sin,
11:21 he didn't recognize his own sin
11:24 because of the heart is deceitful above all things
11:27 and we are the master of self-deception.
11:30 Psychologists call that a cognitive bias.
11:35 The Bible calls it flattering yourself
11:38 or deceiving yourself
11:40 or the Bible calls it having a deluded heart.
11:43 In fact, Psalm 36, two says this,
11:46 the Bible says in their own eyes,
11:49 they flatter themselves too much
11:53 to detect or hate their own sin.
11:57 I'm not that bad, I'm not doing anything wrong
12:00 and we flatter ourselves and deceive ourselves
12:04 and that's why it's important to adopt
12:07 the habit of self-examination.
12:10 I researched this and spent a lot of time
12:12 in the last few weeks
12:13 and I discovered that our self-deception
12:17 tends to manifest itself in five major ways.
12:21 You may see yourself somewhere
12:23 in these different categories, I'll show you them.
12:26 The first one is what experts call addiction to distraction.
12:31 Because we're doing something wrong,
12:35 we find ourselves unintentionally distracting ourselves
12:40 by anything that keeps us from facing the truth
12:43 about ourselves.
12:45 It might be an addiction to pornography,
12:48 it might be an addiction to social media,
12:50 it might be an addiction to the news,
12:53 it might be an addiction to talking bad about other people,
12:56 it might be an addiction to alcohol
12:58 or some other form of drug.
13:00 It's an addiction that distracts us
13:03 from facing the truth about ourselves.
13:07 The second way it manifests is in a manic cheeriness.
13:11 This is a person that's not really happy
13:13 but pretends like they're happy all the time.
13:16 I'd call it the Lego syndrome, right?
13:18 Everything is awesome.
13:20 Okay, you gotta have kids to understand that reference.
13:24 But it's like you just go around smiling
13:28 and acting like everything's great
13:29 and showing this great life on social media
13:32 when the truth of the matter is, in honest moments,
13:34 you're actually down or maybe depressed or discouraged
13:37 or maybe even worse, having thoughts of ending your life
13:40 and yet you don't show it, you show this manic cheeriness,
13:44 even trying to deceive yourself.
13:46 Another way we'll see it is in judgmentalism.
13:50 We have something wrong with us
13:53 but we point out the faults in other people.
13:56 We point out the speck in their eye
13:59 when we have a log in our own eye.
14:02 And what we do is we oftentimes will judge others
14:05 very, very harshly about the own sin in their life
14:10 when the reality is we're vulnerable
14:12 to that very sin in our life.
14:14 We judge in others the very thing
14:17 that we dislike in ourselves.
14:19 The next thing we're gonna find
14:21 is that we can be very, very defensive.
14:23 We're offended if anyone makes any indication
14:28 or suggestion that we might be wrong,
14:31 that we're vulnerable, that we're doing something unwise,
14:34 that we're doing something sinful.
14:36 Any suggestion that we have a problem,
14:39 we're defensive against them.
14:40 We may deflect it, we may say that they have the problem,
14:44 it's not our fault, we don't have a problem,
14:46 it's someone else's fault or I'm a victim or whatever it is,
14:49 is we're completely defensive about any suggestion.
14:52 And the final one is sometimes we just become cynical.
14:56 We surrender to cynicism.
14:58 And we think that everything is bad in life
15:01 and everyone else is the problem and everyone is wrong
15:05 and we deceive ourselves
15:07 because we don't wanna face the truth about ourselves.
15:12 And that is the very thing that David did.
15:16 He deceived himself and his life fell apart.
15:20 What happened when he said, "I'm not doing anything wrong.
15:24 "Everything's okay, I can get away with this.
15:28 "It's not that big of a deal."
15:29 And then sin by sin by sin,
15:31 he found himself in a very, very, very dangerous place.
15:36 Well, the Lord sent a prophet.
15:40 And the prophet Nathan sat down with David
15:43 and had a little conversation.
15:46 And to help David see his own sinfulness,
15:49 Nathan the prophet told him the story.
15:52 And the prophet said,
15:53 "David, let me tell you a little story about two guys.
15:56 "One guy is really, really rich
15:59 "and the other guy was really, really poor.
16:02 "And the rich guy had unlimited number of sheep and cattle.
16:06 "He was rich and the poor guy had only one little lamb.
16:11 "And his whole family was close to the lamb.
16:13 "The lamb was like a little pet.
16:14 "And one day the poor guy with his little lamb
16:17 "ended up at the rich guy's house
16:18 "and it was time for dinner.
16:20 "And the rich guy went to get a lamb.
16:23 "And instead of taking one of his thousands of lambs,
16:27 "he took the one lamb of the poor guy,
16:31 "sacrificed that lamb
16:33 "and fed the poor guy's lamb to him for dinner."
16:37 And David heard that story and said,
16:39 "That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
16:43 "That guy should be punished.
16:45 "He should be put to death."
16:47 And Nathan looked at David in Hebrew and said this,
16:52 (speaking in foreign language)
16:57 (speaking in foreign language)
16:58 means you're the man.
17:00 You're the one who did that.
17:04 You're the one that was judging someone else in this story
17:09 when you're guilty of the very same thing.
17:11 You're the one that's been defensive and pushed back
17:16 and made excuses and rationalized.
17:19 And you've done the very same thing.
17:23 The habit of self-examination.
17:30 Not easy to do.
17:33 Search me, God.
17:36 Search my heart.
17:39 Show me, is there any offensive way, anything sinful,
17:43 anything in my life that I don't see
17:45 that you see that you want to change?
17:49 And I would ask you, if you would stop for a moment
17:51 and let God search you, what problem are you denying?
17:55 What sin are you rationalizing?
18:00 What issue are you hiding?
18:04 Welcome to church early in the year
18:09 where we're gonna get after it, just so you know.
18:12 If I hadn't stepped on your toes yet, just hang in there.
18:14 We're gonna get everybody today.
18:15 That's my goal, everybody, including myself.
18:17 (congregation laughing)
18:21 Where does God want to work?
18:22 Is it a secret addiction?
18:25 You're addicted to porn or masturbation.
18:31 Is it alcohol or drugs?
18:36 Is it that you lose your temper over and over and over again
18:41 and you think, hey, I wouldn't do it if you didn't do that.
18:43 It's not my fault, you make me do it.
18:47 Are you flirting with an affair?
18:49 Or are you in a full-blown affair?
18:54 Are you addicted to overeating
18:58 and make jokes about, ah, it's just the way I am?
19:01 Are you addicted to overspending
19:04 and you pretend like it's not a problem?
19:07 Are you numbing yourself consistently with a drug
19:12 or just with TV or just strolling mindlessly
19:14 on social media?
19:16 Do you say you don't need help?
19:20 You really, really do.
19:24 Asking for help is never a sign of weakness.
19:29 It's always a sign of wisdom.
19:32 Are you at church on the very first weekend of the year?
19:38 Your body's present, but your heart's far from God.
19:42 Search me, God.
19:46 Know my heart.
19:48 See if there's any offensive way in me.
19:51 I wanna give you three warning signs to think about
19:57 as you adopt the habit of self-examination.
20:01 You're asking God to speak to you.
20:04 Let me give you three thoughts.
20:05 Number one is I wanna encourage you to watch
20:07 for what others have tried to tell you.
20:10 If someone else has tried to tell you,
20:13 hey, you might have a problem,
20:15 I always tell myself if more than two people that love me
20:19 tell me I have a problem, I better pay attention to that.
20:23 Maybe there are those that are telling you,
20:25 hey, maybe you're working too much.
20:28 You're not present.
20:31 Or you're always looking at your phone.
20:33 Or you're spending too much time on video games.
20:37 Maybe some people that love you say,
20:40 hey, you drink every single night.
20:43 And you say you don't have a problem,
20:44 but you can't seem to go without it.
20:47 Maybe there are people that love you that tell you
20:49 you're dressing immodestly.
20:52 And I know you say it's the styles,
20:54 and I know you say it's no big deal,
20:55 but people who love you say maybe that is an issue.
20:59 There are people that love you that may say
21:01 you never say no because you have a problem.
21:03 People pleasing.
21:05 When you ask God to search your heart,
21:09 watch for what others that love you
21:12 have tried to say to you.
21:14 The second thing is watch for what you rationalize.
21:19 Watch for whatever you try to explain away.
21:22 Watch for the time when you say it's no big deal,
21:24 and I can handle this, and I'm not hurting anyone,
21:28 and I don't have a problem with this.
21:30 Watch for what you rationalize,
21:32 'cause it'll sneak up on you.
21:33 Amy and I were talking about recently, years ago,
21:37 when we had a single adult life group in our home,
21:40 and we had them all gathered,
21:42 and we were talking about the value of relationships,
21:44 and how much they matter to us,
21:46 and how much we matter to each other.
21:48 And then time went on, and they just wouldn't leave.
21:52 We had a baby, and none of them had babies,
21:54 and they didn't know, and so I said,
21:56 "It's been great, and you all matter so much.
21:58 "We're gonna wrap things up, and it's been awesome."
22:00 And they didn't leave.
22:02 And so I went in the other room,
22:04 and I put on a robe when I came back,
22:06 and said, "It's been awesome, and we got the baby.
22:08 "We're gonna put the baby together."
22:09 And they just wouldn't leave.
22:11 And then I turned the heat up really high.
22:14 I'd been made ridiculously uncomfortable.
22:16 I'm in a robe, Amy's sitting there yawning,
22:18 we got a baby crying.
22:20 We all matter to us so much, but let's call it, it's good.
22:23 And they wouldn't leave.
22:24 And so I said, "Hey, Amy, let's go in the room
22:26 "and check on the baby."
22:27 Went in the room with the baby,
22:28 and I just said to her, "These people are ridiculous.
22:30 "They've got no brain.
22:31 "They don't take any cues.
22:32 "What's wrong with them?
22:33 "They're like socially, they're idiots.
22:35 "They're completely idiots."
22:36 And right as I'm saying that, I looked down,
22:37 and I saw the baby monitor in our bedroom.
22:40 (audience laughing)
22:43 Broadcasting into the living room,
22:46 where relationships matter, and you matter to God,
22:48 and you matter to me, your pastor.
22:50 (audience laughing)
22:53 That was our first church split,
22:59 and since then, we've been rebuilding.
23:01 (audience laughing)
23:04 But watch for those things
23:06 that you just try to explain away.
23:09 I wouldn't do what I'm doing
23:11 if you weren't doing what you're doing.
23:13 Search me, God.
23:15 Watch for what other people are trying to tell you.
23:17 Watch for what you rationalize.
23:19 And number three, watch for where you're most defensive.
23:22 Watch where you're most defensive.
23:25 Wherever you push back and say, "I don't have a problem."
23:27 Or maybe you get a little bit angry and say,
23:28 "Leave me alone, it's none of your business."
23:31 I always tell those that I love
23:34 that the more convinced you are
23:36 that you don't have a problem,
23:38 the more likely it is that you do.
23:40 The harder you push back,
23:44 when people who love you press in,
23:47 the more likely you really do have a problem.
23:49 And I have learned that through the school of hard knocks.
23:54 This is our 28-year anniversary of the church.
23:58 I've been in ministry for 33 years,
24:01 and literally, almost the whole time,
24:04 the people that love me the most have said,
24:07 "Greg, you work too much, you work too hard."
24:10 And almost the whole time, I've said,
24:13 "You guys just don't love Jesus like I do."
24:16 I know that's kind of arrogant,
24:17 but that's literally what I thought,
24:19 is that you don't understand, this is the call on my life.
24:22 And year after year, all the way back in my early 20s,
24:25 they put me in mandatory counseling for being a workaholic,
24:28 and I shook that off.
24:30 And in my 30s, and in my 40s, and in my 50s,
24:33 my body actually started to catch up with me.
24:36 And in 2019, my body started to break down.
24:40 I had a two-week period where I functioned fully
24:43 and had no memory of what took place in that time.
24:46 I was performing, going through the motions,
24:48 and yet I couldn't remember anything.
24:50 And so Amy helped me to get a very good counselor,
24:54 and we started working together.
24:56 And after months of working together,
24:58 his diagnosis and his suggestion
24:59 was incredibly offensive to me.
25:02 He said, "We're not gonna talk you into slowing down,
25:05 "so we have to distract you.
25:06 "And so what I want you to do
25:07 "is come up with a list of 30 things to do.
25:10 "We're gonna try five or six of them.
25:12 "We're gonna start with 30,
25:13 "and they have to be adrenaline-producing,
25:16 "they have to appear kind of dangerous,
25:18 "and they have to involve other men."
25:20 I mean, this is the dumbest thing I've ever heard.
25:22 So you'll be like, it's like race motorcycles,
25:25 or jump out of airplanes, or climb mountains, or whatever.
25:29 I was insulted, I was angry.
25:30 The last thing I needed to do
25:31 was throw axes and play laser tag with a bunch of men.
25:34 Stupid, right?
25:36 And so I pushed back, and he said,
25:39 I said, "This is dumb,
25:40 "I can't believe I'm paying you for this."
25:41 I was real honest, and we had that kind of relationship.
25:44 And he said, "You're kind of at the crossroads right now.
25:48 "And in the same way, I'm gonna say to some of you,
25:50 "you're at a crossroads right now.
25:52 "You let God do what he wants to do,
25:55 "or you stay in bondage."
25:57 And my counselor looked at me and said,
25:59 "One of three things.
25:59 "Number one is you can ignore your wife who loves you,
26:03 "your close friends who love you,
26:05 "and you can ignore my professional opinion,
26:07 "and you can stay the same
26:08 "until you do work yourself to death."
26:10 Like to death, like die because of it.
26:12 "Number two is you can fire me,
26:15 "get another counselor, go through months and months,
26:16 "and come up to the very same conclusion.
26:18 "Or number three, you can get over your pride,
26:21 "of which you've had for years,
26:22 "and you can listen, and you can get better."
26:25 Those are the options.
26:27 And when I say working too much,
26:29 everybody goes, "Yeah, yeah."
26:30 It's almost something like you applaud for.
26:32 It's idolatry is what it is.
26:33 It's idolatry.
26:35 It's not trusting God.
26:36 It's ignoring the more important priority.
26:37 It is a very, very real problem.
26:40 So I listened to his stupid diagnosis.
26:43 I tried two things.
26:44 One is jujitsu, where you actually roll
26:47 and fight men on the ground.
26:50 It looks very odd, strangely fun.
26:52 I don't know how that happened.
26:54 And the other thing I tried is I started taking,
26:56 took flying lessons,
26:57 ended up getting my private pilot's license,
26:59 and then somehow I ended up liking that
27:01 and got my instrument rating.
27:03 And what I know is that whenever someone
27:05 is pressing their forehead,
27:06 their arm into my forehead or choking me out,
27:09 or when I'm trying to land a plane at 300 feet
27:11 in the clouds, you know, when you can't see anything,
27:13 I don't think about work.
27:15 (audience laughing)
27:19 And I hate how good of advice that was,
27:26 because by disconnecting my mind,
27:29 I give myself a mental break,
27:31 and now I am a way better husband,
27:34 way more involved with the kids,
27:36 and even more effective and productive at church
27:39 by listening to wise advice.
27:44 And there are some of you,
27:46 there have been people who love you,
27:47 who've been trying to get through to you for a long time,
27:49 and I want you to hear me clearly.
27:50 You cannot change what you won't confront.
27:55 It's the habit of self-examination.
27:58 And for some of you, honestly,
27:59 like, I just, like, this is the moment of truth.
28:02 It's a new year, God has your attention,
28:05 and you're gonna pray, "Search my heart, test me.
28:08 "See if there is any offensive way in me."
28:10 And I'm gonna ask you right now,
28:12 what is God showing you right now,
28:14 the very thing that you probably don't want to face?
28:17 What is He saying to you?
28:19 If you're afraid of what it is,
28:21 let me tell you right now, He already knows.
28:24 You should not be afraid of God.
28:25 You should be afraid of what your sin will cost you
28:28 if you don't get free from it.
28:29 What do you do?
28:32 Is you run to Him.
28:33 You confess your need of Him.
28:37 You run to the people that love you, your life group.
28:42 If you do not have a life group, how do you do it?
28:45 How do you face the spiritual opposition
28:50 and the temptation and all the distractions of the world
28:52 without an army of people standing by you,
28:54 praying for you in your life, loving you?
28:56 What do you do when you're caught?
28:59 There's two types of confession.
29:00 You confess your sins to God.
29:02 Confess your sins to God,
29:03 His faithful and just to forgive your sins
29:06 and cleanse you from all unrighteousness.
29:07 And you confess your sins to the people
29:09 in your spiritual community.
29:11 Confess your sins to one another
29:13 and pray for each other that you may be healed.
29:16 You confess to God for forgiveness.
29:18 You confess to people for healing, and you confess.
29:21 You confess because the heart is deceitful above all things.
29:26 And that's why David prayed this prayer.
29:29 He prayed, "Creating me, God, a pure heart.
29:33 I've been lying to myself.
29:35 I've been deceiving myself.
29:36 I've been pretending like I was seeking you when I wasn't.
29:39 I've been pretending like I was righteous
29:41 when I was sinning against you, God.
29:42 Creating me a pure heart.
29:44 Restore to me the joy of your salvation
29:48 and grant me a willing spirit to sustain me."
29:52 David sinned big time.
29:56 And yet he's still described as a man after God's own heart.
30:02 No matter what you're trapped in,
30:06 this could be a moment of freedom.
30:09 You confess to God and you confess to people.
30:15 What is God trying to say to you?
30:19 What does he want to do in you?
30:23 Don't resist it.
30:27 He loves you.
30:31 He wants freedom for you.
30:33 And so week number one,
30:36 the habit of self-examination.
30:40 To give God permission to show us
30:44 what we need to hear so we can do what we need to do.
30:47 This is our prayer.
30:51 At all of our churches, would you pray it with me?
30:53 Slowly from the heart with all honesty and integrity,
30:57 feel it as you pray it.
31:00 Search me, God,
31:04 and know my heart.
31:08 Test me and know my anxious thoughts.
31:12 Whatever is weighing on you, cast your anxiety on him
31:15 because he cares so much for you.
31:18 Pray it with me.
31:20 See if there is any offensive way in me, God,
31:25 and lead me in the way of everlasting.
31:29 Because if you want to change your life,
31:33 you change your habits.
31:34 But if you want to change your habits,
31:38 you let God change your heart.
31:41 (gentle music)
31:43 So Heavenly Father, do a work in us.
31:45 We submit and surrender our hearts to you
31:49 and give you permission, God.
31:52 Show us, speak to us, transform us.
32:00 Today as you're reflecting in prayer,
32:09 if you want to be open to what God would say to you,
32:12 would you just lift up your hand right now?
32:13 All of our churches, lift up your hand.
32:15 I hope that's everybody.
32:16 Online, you can just type in the comment section,
32:19 search my heart, oh God.
32:21 Just type it in there, search my heart, oh God.
32:24 Just pray that right where you are right now.
32:25 Just pray it, just say, pray, search my heart.
32:28 Search my heart.
32:30 God, show us if there's any offensive way in us.
32:33 And God, I pray as you have spoken to me
32:36 about my current issue, I confess before you
32:41 that I will confess it to my community.
32:43 I will turn from it and I will depend on you.
32:48 God, give us the courage to tell the truth to ourselves,
32:53 to let your truth, God, your holy truth set us free.
32:59 Jesus, you are the truth.
33:00 You are the way, the truth, and the life.
33:03 And when you know the truth, when you know Jesus,
33:05 the truth is a person.
33:06 When you know the truth, Jesus,
33:09 the truth, Jesus, will set you free.
33:13 As you keep praying today at all of our churches,
33:16 there are those of you, you may be like me,
33:18 you might've been around the church,
33:21 but if you are really honest,
33:23 you don't have a relationship with God.
33:24 Others of you, there's no question,
33:27 you don't have a relationship with God and you know it,
33:30 but something's happening right now,
33:31 you're being drawn to God.
33:32 What is that?
33:33 Let me just tell you right now.
33:34 That is God drawing you to himself.
33:37 This is the Holy Spirit loving you
33:40 and reaching out to you and drawing.
33:42 You may say, I don't even understand this.
33:44 Like, why am I being drawn?
33:46 It's because God loves you and cares for you
33:48 and it's him drawing you to him.
33:51 So what do you do?
33:52 You tell yourself the truth.
33:54 I've sinned, I've messed up, I've fallen short,
33:58 I've done things that are wrong.
33:59 Guess what?
34:00 Welcome to the party.
34:01 We all have, every single one of us.
34:02 The scripture says all of us have sinned.
34:04 That's where we start, that's why we feel guilty.
34:06 And then we just confess our need for Jesus.
34:08 When you call on Jesus, who is Jesus?
34:11 He is the sinless Son of God, perfect in every way.
34:16 He is the Lamb of God who was slain,
34:18 the innocent one who died in our place
34:21 and God raised him from the dead
34:23 so that anybody, and this includes you,
34:24 it doesn't matter what you've done,
34:26 anybody who calls on his name,
34:28 you would be forgiven and you would be made new.
34:31 Today at all of our churches, everybody online,
34:33 those who say, I don't know God personally,
34:36 I don't have a piece of my heart,
34:38 we're gonna step away from our sin,
34:40 we're gonna step toward the truth.
34:42 His name is Jesus.
34:43 When we surrender our lives to him,
34:45 he'll forgive all of our sins.
34:47 He will make you brand new.
34:49 Listen, some of you, today's,
34:50 here's what we're gonna do.
34:51 Eyes open right now, everybody up, eyes open.
34:53 Nobody hiding, tell the truth.
34:55 Those of you today that would say,
34:57 I don't know him, but I need him,
34:59 I'm turning from my sin, I'm calling on Jesus today.
35:02 I need Jesus as my savior.
35:04 With everybody looking around, we're not hiding anywhere.
35:06 Jesus said, if you confess before people,
35:08 I'll confess before my God in heaven.
35:09 If you don't, I won't.
35:11 So now in front of everybody, I need Jesus.
35:13 I need him as a savior.
35:14 Today, I give my life to him.
35:16 That's your prayer.
35:17 Lift your hands high right now,
35:18 all over the place and say, that's my prayer.
35:20 Praise God for you.
35:21 Praise God for you.
35:22 Others of you that say yes,
35:23 right back over there and for you as well,
35:25 right back there, lift them high.
35:26 Praise God for you.
35:28 We worship God for you.
35:29 Right back there, I need Jesus.
35:31 Welcome into the family today.
35:32 Others today, right back over here saying, yes, I surrender.
35:35 Come on, give him some praise today.
35:37 Give God glory for who he is and what he's doing online.
35:41 Type in the comment section for everybody to see,
35:44 I need Jesus.
35:45 Type that in and wherever you are, nobody prays alone.
35:48 Guess what?
35:49 We're not going through life alone.
35:50 You're not going through life alone.
35:52 Hey, this is your first life group.
35:54 Your next one gets smaller.
35:56 This week is smaller.
35:57 This is your first one.
35:58 Right now, everybody together, would you pray aloud?
36:00 Pray, Heavenly Father, forgive my sins.
36:04 Jesus, save me.
36:06 Make me new.
36:08 Fill me with your Spirit so I could know you and serve you.
36:13 My life is not my own.
36:16 I give it all to you.
36:18 Thank you for new life.
36:21 Now you have mine.
36:23 In Jesus' name I pray.
36:25 Can somebody tell God, thank you.
36:28 Give him some glory, give him some praise.
36:30 Did this message on healthy habits speak to you?
36:32 Well, we've got even more videos ready for you right now.
36:36 Click here to access more content on habits.
36:39 (upbeat music)