• last year
In Samantha Sanders’s documentary short, a group of women find pandemic solace, in a death-defying ritual.
Transcript
00:00 [ Music ]
00:06 [ Background Sounds ]
00:33 [ Background Sounds ]
00:49 >> That is unreal.
00:51 >> I know, isn't it beautiful?
00:53 [ Background Sounds ]
00:55 >> Hey, Deirdre.
00:57 >> Morning.
00:59 >> Careful, it's super slick.
01:00 >> Oh my God, look at the lake.
01:02 >> Isn't it gorgeous?
01:03 [ Background Sounds ]
01:24 >> It's raining ice.
01:27 [ Music ]
01:37 [ Background Sounds ]
02:02 >> The cool thing about swimming at sunrise is every day is different.
02:06 [ Background Sounds ]
02:09 >> Some days you get to see the sun just starting to rise and it looks like liquid fire.
02:16 [ Background Sounds ]
02:22 >> And then other days it's all overcast.
02:25 [ Background Sounds ]
02:29 >> Some days the waves are enormous and you think, should I get in today?
02:35 [ Background Sounds ]
02:40 >> But every day it's exhilarating and it's fun.
02:44 [ Background Sounds ]
03:02 >> You get in the water and it envelops you and you move through it.
03:06 It's otherworldly.
03:08 And when you swim far in the open water, it's moving meditation.
03:15 [ Background Sounds ]
03:18 >> You're also every day learning something different.
03:21 [ Background Sounds ]
03:24 >> About the way that the water moves, about the way that your body feels when the water moves this way.
03:30 >> You know, when the waves are bigger, I get a little seasick if I stop to look at the sun.
03:34 So, you know, it's a daily education.
03:37 [ Background Sounds ]
03:40 >> I was treated for cancer back in 2011 and I remember going into the water when I was finally cleared after the surgery and the radiation and the chemo.
03:51 [ Music ]
03:53 >> And it just felt incredible.
03:55 [ Music ]
03:58 >> It was this feeling of just being not broken anymore.
04:02 [ Music ]
04:09 >> I feel just very in tune with my body.
04:12 [ Music ]
04:14 >> All I'm really thinking about is am I kicking?
04:17 Am I stroking?
04:19 I'm breathing.
04:23 [ Music ]
04:45 >> When the pandemic hit, initially I was in denial about it.
04:50 Then it got serious very, very quickly.
04:53 [ Background Sounds ]
05:04 >> I don't know that I ever would have been prepared for how affected I became this year.
05:12 I just went into an extremely deep depression.
05:18 [ Background Sounds ]
05:23 >> Just getting up every morning and going to the water was an attempt to sort of have a little moment each day that I was getting up and out.
05:32 It was a reason to keep waking up every morning and getting out of bed.
05:38 [ Background Sounds ]
05:46 >> When I started swimming in the lake, I liked actually being by myself.
05:50 [ Background Sounds ]
05:53 >> But maybe midsummer, Deirdre, Helen, and I began to like say hello in the mornings.
06:00 And even though we weren't swimming together, there was always an acknowledgment of being there together.
06:07 [ Background Sounds ]
06:11 >> I think there was comfort in not feeling as isolated as we all were feeling in our own homes.
06:19 [ Background Sounds ]
06:25 >> I think that was the impetus also to just continue on through the winter.
06:32 [ Background Sounds ]
06:39 >> I've always seen the world as the glass half full.
06:42 I'm a lucky person in that way.
06:45 But from the onset of the pandemic, when we first started hearing about it in January, I was very concerned.
06:54 [ Background Sounds ]
07:01 >> My husband, John, woke up April 1st. He couldn't breathe.
07:07 And April 4th, 2020, John died from coronavirus.
07:13 [ Background Sounds ]
07:16 >> The children and I couldn't get together. We couldn't have any kind of ceremony.
07:21 We couldn't do anything that would feel normal when somebody dies.
07:28 [ Music ]
07:55 >> She was trying her best to make sense of a situation that was beyond reckoning.
08:01 [ Music ]
08:08 >> Swimming is this marvelous antidote.
08:13 [ Music ]
08:20 >> Then November happened, and I didn't want to get out of the lake because it would mean that I would be isolated again.
08:27 [ Music ]
08:29 >> Jennifer and Helen were talking about how they thought that they could swim through the winter and what did I think.
08:38 [ Music ]
08:40 >> And so I just decided, well, I'll just keep going and see what I can bear.
08:47 [ Music ]
09:12 >> This feeling of getting into cold water is electrifying.
09:17 You are just briefly breathless.
09:22 >> And everything that is wrong or stressful just dissipates.
09:31 >> Wonderful.
09:33 >> My skin feels as though I'm turning bionic. I feel metallic.
09:41 [ Music ]
09:43 >> That's Deirdre's signature.
09:45 >> Yeah.
09:47 >> The exhilaration is just remarkable.
09:52 >> Gorgeous.
09:54 >> I feel like we've discovered the fountain of youth.
09:58 >> It's a balmy 40 degree.
10:01 >> We became very obsessive about how cold the water was getting.
10:07 >> You know, it's 50, then it's 40, then it's 40.2, then it's 39.
10:13 >> I had two thermometers that both busted this year in the cold water, so I didn't get another one.
10:20 We just figured that it's cold.
10:22 >> So then it's about, I can't wait to swim in the snow.
10:26 Then it was like, I can't wait to swim when there's ice.
10:29 And then we had no idea, ice, what did ice mean?
10:34 >> This winter it meant so many different kinds of ice, because, you know, there's the first ice that was like a very thin, thin layer of ice.
10:40 >> Almost like snowflakes on the water. Break them as I stroked, and then turn around and they would have reformed behind me.
10:49 >> Ice that was so sharp that you actually were getting cut, and you needed to be careful.
10:54 [ Sound of water rushing ]
10:59 >> And then, you know, we got real ice.
11:03 [ Sound of water rushing ]
11:09 [ Music ]
11:32 [ Sound of water rushing ]
11:42 >> We knew that this was not to be taken lightly, and we each step along the way reassessed whether this was something that we could safely do.
11:52 The shore is hell. Getting dressed is hell. The after drop is brutal.
12:01 [ Sound of water rushing ]
12:06 >> However, there's a massive rush of endorphins. You feel superhuman. It's an amazing feeling that lasts the entire day.
12:16 [ Sound of water rushing ]
12:22 >> The feeling of being fully, utterly alive and joyous, in contrast to 2020 and COVID, it was, well, well worth the effort.
12:35 [ Sound of water rushing ]
12:45 >> Right there. >> All right.
12:49 >> Yeah. There's another ledge right in front of you, and then there's a bigger ledge that I'm on.
12:54 >> Yeah. >> Woo!
12:57 [ Laughter ]
13:00 >> It's beautifully freezing.
13:03 >> Swimming with these women through the pandemic means the world to me.
13:08 >> Okay. >> Sit down. And then you're going to come right over here. There's a ledge.
13:13 >> It is like being embraced every single morning.
13:18 >> Okay. Wait a second. We should cut out. >> Should we do patty cake?
13:21 >> No. >> Good work. [ Laughter ]
13:24 >> We were like three strangers that came together, and we forged a friendship through this experience.
13:32 >> Oh, my gosh. Thank you for making the hole.
13:35 >> I'm hoping John's watching me and can see what a gift it is.
13:40 >> Now that I'm, like, purple, I'm getting out soon. [ Laughter ]
13:44 >> I'm getting out. >> Okay. Go ahead.
13:48 >> There is strength in being able to do something yourself by yourself.
13:52 But I think for me, it's created in my life a tendency to feel like I have to do things alone.
14:01 I think what this experience has done is, you know, showed me the importance of community and support.
14:15 There is power in being with people.
14:19 Swimming through the winter, it helped us get through. It helped us cope.
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