My Tinder Date Blocked Me After Seeing My Skin | SHAKE MY BEAUTY
DAISY does not remember life without the "severe eczema" she experienced growing up and was prescribed steroids as treatment for "as long as [she] can remember" - until the steroids stopped working when she was 25 years old. When truly filmed with Daisy just over a year ago, she was almost a year into what she suspected at the time was Topical Steroid Withdrawal (TSW), as she attempted to go natural and let her skin heal itself. She now has an official TSW diagnosis - and she explained to truly how the withdrawal from her treatment has affected her: "The way steroids work is you put them on and the redness goes away, but when you stop using them, it comes back with a force. I was red raw." She now describes her skin as "unpredictable" and has to adapt her daily skincare to whatever symptoms she experiences day-to-day. Daisy's symptoms have often drawn the attention of others - and she says she is "used to" people making comments about her skin in public. This carried over into her dating life when she joined dating apps - with one person on Tinder pressing Daisy to give him her Instagram. When she eventually did, she noticed "30 seconds later" that she had been "unmatched." With some "terrible" dates under her belt, Daisy matched with Alexander and suddenly everything changed. Alexander remembers how, after their first date, Daisy had a flare up and was "trying to not meet up" and offer him "an out" - but Alexander did not allow Daisy to push him away and was soon "running baths, making teas, going to the shop five times a day for bath salts" for her. Daisy's relationship has made her life "almost normal" and although she still faces "struggle and pain" on a daily basis, Daisy now feels that her skin is "the least interesting thing" about her and she has learned to embrace her newfound body positivity: "Body acceptance for me is about just being happy... And not worrying about what other people think. If you're happy with yourself there should be no problem."
Follow Daisy on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/daisymalin_skin
Follow Daisy on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@daisymalin
Follow Daisy on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/daisymalin_skin
Follow Daisy on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@daisymalin
Transcript
00:00 Tropical steroid withdrawal is a skin condition.
00:03 I can look red raw, my skin can ooze, flake.
00:07 My Tinder date blocked me after seeing my Instagram.
00:11 I realised if I want a date, I have to be the right person
00:14 and it has to kind of work.
00:15 My relationship with Alexander has massively improved my life.
00:19 I just wanted to support you.
00:22 You are really great.
00:25 No, you know you're really great.
00:26 I love you.
00:28 [Suspenseful music]
00:33 My skin is currently pretty unpredictable.
00:36 A lot of the time I can look red raw, my skin can ooze, flake.
00:41 Get very hot, I get nerve pain, which makes me scratch.
00:45 Yeah, the list is quite long.
00:46 Last time since I saw you,
00:48 we spoke about it as I had severe eczema.
00:51 My body would just ooze and leak.
00:53 It was like burning, itching, swelling, flaking
00:57 and consistent flaking.
01:00 I've now gone back to a doctor
01:01 and I have the official diagnosis
01:04 of topical steroid withdrawal,
01:06 which is a skin condition caused by long-term use
01:10 of steroids or other similar medications.
01:13 I'd always, always, always used steroids
01:18 for as long as I can remember.
01:21 At about the age of 25, my skin, the steroids stopped working.
01:25 The way steroids work is you put them on
01:27 and then all the redness goes away, the inflammation,
01:29 but when you stop using them, it comes back like a force.
01:33 It was like red raw.
01:34 In February, I'll be three years in.
01:38 So that's three years, no medication.
01:41 This is just general moisturizer
01:43 with also hyaluronic acid in it.
01:45 And usually I won't kind of like properly rub it in.
01:49 I'll kind of like leave it to just sink in.
01:52 And then I'll usually go over with the probiotic mist.
01:55 My skincare routine is changing
01:57 to whatever my skin's like at the time.
02:00 So if I have like oozy, wet skin that's really red,
02:03 I will salt bath and then limit the amount of products.
02:08 I have bad days and I'm like,
02:13 I can feel people looking at me.
02:15 I feel people's eyes on me.
02:17 I had a man in a pub one time tell me
02:19 I'd be pretty if I wasn't so red.
02:21 The other day on a train, a woman asked me
02:23 if I've been beaten up by someone
02:25 because of the mark from my face.
02:27 Like, I'm kind of just used to it.
02:30 I used to really love makeup.
02:32 But then after a while,
02:33 like my skin couldn't tolerate a lot of stuff.
02:36 I really didn't leave the house that much.
02:38 I was very conscious of how I looked, how red I was.
02:43 I was missing out on like so much life
02:45 that I would just sit in all day and I was really depressed.
02:49 And I found that the more I started sharing,
02:51 like the more people were nicer online
02:53 and it was like I found like a group of support.
02:58 This video is majority gonna be about eczema and my past.
03:02 I started posting online
03:04 because I was at university up in Scotland
03:07 and really I just wanted to beat people to the punch.
03:10 I remember thinking for my own sanity,
03:12 I'm gonna like share it now.
03:14 So when people see me,
03:15 they're not like, what's wrong with her?
03:18 Since I started sharing my journey,
03:19 I have got amazing messages constantly.
03:22 Thank you so much for sharing your journey.
03:24 It helps me so much.
03:25 I wasn't gonna have a wedding or a ceremony
03:27 because I felt like I didn't deserve it.
03:30 But then I found your page and it's because of you
03:33 that I had the confidence to follow through
03:34 with my wedding day.
03:36 And then she sent pictures of her wedding.
03:38 I'm just like amazed
03:40 that I can make this much of a difference to someone.
03:43 My confidence has definitely improved.
03:46 I think it's also having support of a good partner
03:49 and having like the support around you.
03:51 So we met on Tinder about...
03:55 - Almost a year ago.
03:56 - Almost a year.
03:57 I think a lot of my pictures were old pictures.
04:01 No.
04:01 - They weren't like necessarily old,
04:02 but they were like good skin day.
04:05 - Good skin day, maybe flared her makeup on, obviously.
04:08 Like it wasn't something I was hiding.
04:10 But then when you think about it like that,
04:11 it does kind of sound like I was being slightly dishonest.
04:15 - You'd had a pretty bad experience
04:18 with people being less than kind on dating apps
04:21 when they learned of your skin condition.
04:24 So I can understand you doing that.
04:27 - My dating experience since I got sick
04:29 have been pretty bad.
04:31 I went on probably about four or five dates
04:34 before I met Alexander.
04:35 And they were all pretty terrible.
04:38 I was like speaking to someone on Tinder
04:40 and they kept going,
04:41 what's your Instagram?
04:42 What's your Instagram?
04:43 And I'm thinking, oh no.
04:44 Like, I just remember being like,
04:47 oh, you know, like I'm going through something
04:50 at the moment, so maybe I'll show you when we meet.
04:53 And he was like, don't be silly, like show me.
04:56 So I think I sent him my Instagram
04:58 and I think about 30 seconds later I was on Match.
05:02 So I just started stopped doing things for other people
05:04 and realized that if I want a date,
05:06 I have to be the right person
05:07 and it has to kind of work.
05:09 - After our first date, you had a flare up
05:11 and you were trying to knock me up with me.
05:14 You were trying to kind of give me an out.
05:18 And I said to you, like, I made it very clear
05:21 that I wanted to see you again.
05:23 - My relationship with Alexander
05:24 has massively improved my life.
05:27 I don't think I realized like how nice
05:30 and considerate people were
05:33 because I'd done this on my own for so long.
05:35 Waking up at like 6am because I can't sleep,
05:39 I would get up already be a bath run
05:42 and a cup of tea by the bath.
05:44 If I needed something,
05:45 he'll go out any hour of the day to get it.
05:48 - When we first met, you were running baths, making teas.
05:52 - Yeah.
05:53 - Going to the shop five times a day for bath salts
05:57 and things for me.
05:59 - Yeah.
06:01 - Why did you decide to be so nice?
06:03 - When you're truly in love with someone,
06:05 you're willing to do whatever it takes to help them
06:10 and to make their life as good as it can be.
06:13 So that's why very immediately,
06:16 I just wanted to support you.
06:19 - I give the man credit.
06:20 The man does everything.
06:21 Like he's definitely,
06:24 it's yeah, it's changed my life,
06:25 made my life so much easier and almost normal,
06:29 which it definitely wasn't before.
06:31 - I see how hard life gets for you.
06:35 Nobody else does as much as you are able to share
06:39 as much as you can on Instagram.
06:41 I don't think you can really distill what you go through.
06:44 So I am very, very proud of the fact that
06:49 in spite of all of the struggle and pain
06:51 that you're in daily,
06:52 that you do still manage to put yourself out there
06:56 and put other people before yourself,
06:58 which is pretty remarkable
07:00 when your immediate needs are so severe.
07:03 - You're really great.
07:04 No, you know you're really great.
07:07 I love you.
07:12 - Having a skin condition has taught me
07:14 that my skin is the least interesting thing about me.
07:18 I won't let my skin stop me from living my best life.
07:21 If you are struggling with your skin,
07:23 I would say tomorrow is a new day
07:26 and don't worry about anyone else.
07:29 Body positivity or body acceptance for me
07:32 is just being happy and content with yourself
07:35 and loving yourself
07:36 and not worrying about what other people think.
07:38 If you're happy with yourself,
07:40 there should be no problems.
07:42 (air whooshing)
07:45 (gentle music)
07:48 (gentle music)
07:50 (gentle music)
07:53 (gentle music)
07:56 (gentle music)
07:58 [BLANK_AUDIO]