Catégorie
📚
ÉducationTranscription
00:00 To those of you that are parents, what I know about you
00:04 is that you wanna give your children the very best.
00:07 Is that true?
00:08 Raise your hands if it's true.
00:09 Online, you can type in the comment section,
00:11 I wanna give my kids the very best.
00:14 We wanna give our kids the best,
00:16 and in fact, Scripture even tells us that we want to.
00:19 When Jesus said this in Matthew 7 and 11,
00:21 he said, "You, if you're sinful people,"
00:25 even those of us, we've all fallen short, we've all sinned,
00:28 and yet, we know how to give good gifts to our children,
00:33 so how much more will our Heavenly Father
00:37 give good gifts to those who ask Him?
00:40 We all wanna give the very best to our kids,
00:44 we have really, really good intentions,
00:47 and then we get tired.
00:48 How many of you know what I'm talking about?
00:51 It's really, really difficult,
00:53 parenting has always been difficult,
00:56 and in today's culture, it's increasingly difficult,
01:00 and so we try to do the right things,
01:02 and then we get worn out.
01:03 It's even in the smallest things, for example,
01:05 when you have multiple kids,
01:06 it's amazing how you lower your standards over time.
01:09 Like when we had our first child,
01:11 and we gave Katie a pacifier,
01:13 if the pacifier ever fell on the ground,
01:15 we would boil that thing, sterilize it,
01:18 before giving it back to her.
01:19 Then Mandy came along, and we would just run it
01:21 under the faucet, and plop it back in her mouth,
01:24 and then when Anna came along,
01:25 I would just put it in my mouth,
01:27 and then put it back into hers.
01:29 Then Sam came along, and we would just let the dog
01:32 lick it clean, who knows what I'm talking about,
01:35 and then put it back in their mouth.
01:37 We got to our fifth kid,
01:39 you wonder what we did with the fifth kid,
01:40 whenever he would drop the pacifier,
01:42 we'd say like, "Too bad, Steven, you're on your own.
01:45 "Cry yourself to sleep, or get your own pacifier.
01:48 "Find your own."
01:49 And so he did, 'cause we wouldn't give it to him.
01:51 This was Steven, who created his own pacifier,
01:54 and this was Steven with the pacifier
01:56 with his breakfast on his head.
01:57 (audience laughing)
01:59 Why did he do that, I don't know,
02:00 we didn't even give him a plate,
02:01 because he was the fifth kid in the family.
02:05 But we love to give our best to our children,
02:09 because we really want them to be happy.
02:12 So we put them in the best schools we can,
02:15 we get them the coolest shoes that we can afford,
02:17 we get them the trendy jeans if we can afford them,
02:20 so they're gonna fit in, we'll get them the latest phone.
02:23 We wanna give our kids the very best.
02:26 But what if what we give them actually hurts them?
02:32 So often, with our best intentions,
02:37 we wanna try to help them be happy.
02:40 So much so that we may even worship
02:43 at the altar of happiness.
02:45 And I would suggest to you
02:48 that when it comes to our children,
02:50 we need to worry less about today's happiness
02:54 and more about tomorrow's readiness.
02:57 We need to do more to prepare them
02:59 (audience applauding)
03:01 to be faithful to God in a very complicated world.
03:06 And so what I wanna do is I wanna show you
03:08 three different times and ways
03:11 that with good intentions,
03:12 our giving might actually hurt them.
03:15 I'll give you three different examples.
03:17 The first way that giving hurts, number one,
03:20 is when we give them things they didn't earn.
03:23 We do this early on.
03:25 It generally happens, we break down,
03:27 maybe for the first time in a grocery store,
03:29 when our kid is throwing a fit
03:31 and everybody is judging our bad parenting.
03:33 Have you ever been there?
03:35 They want the toy or they want the lollipop,
03:37 and so finally we surrender and say,
03:40 "Here's the toy, here's the lollipop,"
03:42 and we give them what they want.
03:43 And then society reinforces the entitled mindset
03:47 with everything from like participation awards.
03:50 And I hate to be the old guy with the bad attitude,
03:55 but I am the old guy with the attitude
03:59 when it comes to participation awards,
04:02 because when you give a kid a trophy for just showing up,
04:06 it creates a very entitled mindset.
04:08 And I'll just say it,
04:10 nobody should ever be rewarded for showing up.
04:14 That's the baseline, that is the expectation.
04:17 And that's why as parents, we need to recognize
04:20 one of the best things we can do
04:22 is give our children the blessing of earning the blessings.
04:27 One of the best things we can do
04:30 is give our children the blessing of earning the blessings.
04:35 For example, if they wanna play video games,
04:38 we're gonna say, "We want you to play video games,
04:41 "and you can play video games after you do your chores."
04:45 Or you wanna get a car when you're 16,
04:47 "We want you to get a car,
04:49 "but we might say you pay for half of it,
04:52 "and if we can afford it, we'll match the other half."
04:55 Same with phones.
04:56 I had a friend of mine who did this with their children,
04:59 I thought it was very brilliant.
05:00 They said, "Okay, you want a new phone?
05:03 "You can borrow my phone."
05:04 And the kid's like, "No, it's my phone."
05:06 And the dad said, "Did you pay for the phone?"
05:09 And the kid said, "No."
05:10 And the dad said, "Well, then it's my phone.
05:12 "I'll let you use my phone, but you're borrowing my phone,
05:16 "and therefore, if I want my phone back
05:18 "before you go to bed, I can get my phone back,
05:21 "because this isn't your phone, it's actually mine.
05:23 "If you wanna buy your own phone,
05:25 "then you can have your phone,
05:26 "but at this point, it's my phone."
05:28 And the kid's then gonna say, "That's not fair,
05:29 "you're so mean, and some of you kids
05:31 "are getting really mad at me right now
05:33 "because I'm giving your parents ideas
05:34 "that you're not gonna like."
05:36 And then you're gonna argue with them,
05:37 and to the parents, I just wanna kinda remind you
05:39 that your children are never your peers.
05:42 You are the parent, and they don't get an equal say
05:47 in every single decision.
05:50 We don't wanna create an entitled mindset.
05:53 We wanna create a good work ethic with a grateful mindset.
05:57 And so the first mistake that we often make
05:59 is we give them things that they didn't earn.
06:01 The second big mistake, and this is so common
06:03 in our culture today, is we give them praise
06:07 they don't deserve.
06:09 We love them so much, and we wanna build their self-worth,
06:13 so we tell them, "You're the smartest kid in the world,
06:18 "and you're the prettiest person,
06:20 "and you're the best of the best of the best."
06:23 The problem is, they're not the smartest,
06:26 they're not the prettiest, and they're not the best.
06:30 And studies are very, very conclusive
06:33 on how over-praising actually hurts our children.
06:36 And the challenge is that when praise is cheap,
06:40 it robs our children of confidence.
06:43 And over-praising actually creates anxiety,
06:47 which is a little bit what happened to me
06:49 when I was growing up.
06:50 People said, "You're special, and you're special,
06:52 "and you're smart, and you're the smartest."
06:54 And I thought to myself, "Okay, then to be loved,
06:57 "I've gotta be smart."
06:59 But when I look around, I don't feel smart.
07:02 And so therefore, if I'm not gonna be smart enough,
07:05 I'm not gonna be loved,
07:06 and it created this real internal tension,
07:10 and that's what we often do to our children,
07:12 robbing them of putting their faith in God
07:15 or having confidence in what God put in them.
07:19 And that's why, if you're taking notes,
07:20 you may wanna write this down.
07:21 It's better to praise the process
07:25 than to praise the person.
07:27 It's better to praise the process
07:29 of what they're putting into it
07:30 than to say, "You're the best,
07:32 "you're the most special."
07:33 So instead of saying, "You're the smartest kid
07:35 "because you made an A,"
07:36 we're gonna say, "Oh my gosh,
07:37 "you worked really hard on that paper.
07:39 "Congratulations, you honored God
07:42 "by bringing your best and earning an A."
07:46 Instead of saying, "You're the very best one out there,
07:49 "you're faithful, and you've got a good work ethic."
07:52 And you may say, "But isn't that
07:53 "kind of like works righteousness?"
07:55 No, no, no, no.
07:56 We love our children for who they are,
08:01 but when we praise them,
08:02 we actually praise them for what they are doing
08:06 that honors God.
08:07 And there's a big, big difference.
08:08 We don't wanna give them the wrong things.
08:10 And the challenge is, we often do,
08:12 we give them things they didn't earn,
08:14 we give them praise that they don't deserve,
08:17 and the third challenge, and we all do this,
08:19 is we give them freedoms they can't handle.
08:22 We give them freedoms they can't handle.
08:24 It's crazy how sometimes we're like
08:27 massively overly protective in some ways,
08:31 and then we're foolishly naive in others, right?
08:35 We'll say to your 12-year-old,
08:36 "You can't cross the street by yourself,"
08:40 and we're overly protective.
08:41 And then we naively give them full access to a cell phone.
08:45 We give a middle schooler this device and say, "Good luck.
08:51 "Hope you don't get addicted to porn.
08:55 "Hope no one sex you on Snapchat.
08:57 "Hope you don't battle with FOMO
09:02 "and feelings of ongoing isolation and depression
09:05 "and anxiety as you scroll mindlessly through TikTok."
09:10 We give them too many freedoms
09:13 in ways that they're really not prepared for.
09:15 So what do we do?
09:16 Well, as kind of a side note, reflecting on last week,
09:19 our goal, because our children are dependent on us,
09:23 when they're babies, that they need us for everything.
09:25 Our goal is to gradually transfer dependence
09:29 from us onto God.
09:32 We're helping them to learn to trust in God,
09:35 less in us and more in God, less in us and more in God.
09:38 And then as they become more trustworthy
09:42 and as they become more responsible,
09:46 then we give them more freedom
09:49 because they've been growing into it.
09:51 The challenge is culture kind of programs us
09:54 to mindlessly parent.
09:57 We create entitlement by giving them things
09:59 they didn't earn.
10:00 We create insecurity by giving them praise
10:03 that they don't deserve.
10:04 And we create kids caught in bondage and sin
10:07 because we give them freedoms that they can't handle.
10:10 So what do we do?
10:13 If we want our children to truly love God,
10:18 what are the gifts that we can give them
10:21 to help them become fully devoted followers of Christ?
10:25 Well, what I wanna do is I wanna look again at the Shema.
10:27 We talked about the Shema last week.
10:30 We're gonna look at the most recited
10:32 and most essential prayer prayed in Judaism.
10:36 And we're gonna look at the Old Testament
10:37 and let this speak to us in our New Testament lives
10:40 in Deuteronomy chapter six, starting in verse four.
10:44 And scripture tells us this,
10:45 "Hero Israel, the Lord our God, the Lord, is one."
10:50 Is one.
10:51 What are we to do in our families?
10:55 What are we to do as parents?
10:57 What are we to encourage our children to do?
11:00 To love the Lord your God with all your heart
11:05 and with all your soul and with all your strength.
11:09 These commandments that I give you today
11:11 are to be on your heart, scripture says.
11:15 Impress them on your children.
11:18 Talk about them when you sit at home
11:20 and when you walk along the road,
11:22 when you lie down and when you get up.
11:25 Tie them as symbols on your hands
11:27 and bind them on your foreheads.
11:29 Write them on the doorframes of your houses
11:32 and on your gates.
11:35 Love the Lord your God with all your heart,
11:38 mind, soul, and strength.
11:39 What are the gifts that we can give our children
11:42 to help them love God?
11:44 Let me tell you about three gifts to give your children.
11:47 We're gonna talk about them today through God's word.
11:49 Number one, we're gonna give them a community worth having.
11:53 Number two, we're gonna give them
11:55 a standard worth achieving.
11:57 And number three, we're going to give them
11:59 a faith worth sharing.
12:02 Let's all say it aloud, all of our Life.Church locations,
12:05 what are we to give them?
12:05 We're gonna give them a community worth having,
12:09 a standard worth achieving, and a faith worth sharing.
12:14 Let's start at the first ones.
12:16 As parents and as a church,
12:19 we wanna give the emerging generation,
12:21 and we all do this together, not just mom and dad,
12:24 this is what we do as the body of Christ,
12:27 is we give them a community worth having.
12:31 Deuteronomy 6, four says,
12:33 "Here," not person, not individual,
12:36 "Here, O Israel,"
12:40 God is speaking to the community of his people,
12:43 "Love the Lord our God, the Lord is one."
12:48 An Old Testament Jewish family
12:51 often viewed themselves very different
12:52 than a modern day family would view themselves.
12:55 To an Old Testament Jew,
12:57 the family was way more than the immediate family,
13:00 like us four no more.
13:02 The Jewish family community,
13:05 it consisted of the parents, the children,
13:08 the children's spouses, the grandkids,
13:11 the cousins, the nieces, the nephews,
13:13 even the workers that worked in the family business.
13:18 The family community would have consisted
13:21 of up to as many as 80 people.
13:24 This was a community worth having.
13:27 If you ask me, Craig, or you ask Amy,
13:32 what one thing did you all do as parents
13:35 to help set your children up for lasting spiritual success?
13:39 We both would answer that we worked to help them create,
13:44 to build, and to be a part of
13:47 an intentional Christ-centered community.
13:51 If there is one thing that we did above anything else
13:54 that helped our children thrive spiritually,
13:57 it was to get them involved, to plant their roots deep
14:00 in a very intentional Christ-centered community
14:04 of like-minded friends.
14:07 In fact, it was so important to us
14:08 that we chose our life group
14:11 not based on who the parents were,
14:14 as much on based on what the families valued.
14:17 It wasn't just like, who do we like,
14:20 but it's who do we want our children to be like,
14:23 and created a community and joined a community
14:26 intentionally based on helping them
14:29 have roots planted deeply in Christ.
14:32 Remember the principle from last week we talked about,
14:35 that who and what you expose your children to
14:39 will shape who they become and what they believe.
14:44 It's ridiculously important who we expose them to,
14:48 what we expose them to.
14:50 It shapes their beliefs and it shapes their attitudes.
14:54 Most of us as parents, our philosophy is this,
14:57 have fun at school.
14:58 Good luck.
15:01 See ya.
15:05 And we just send them out.
15:07 One of the best things we can do
15:09 is intentionally help them find, build, create
15:13 a Christ-centered community.
15:16 And we know this is so important
15:18 because whatever you did growing up,
15:21 whether good or bad, you rarely did it alone.
15:24 If you did something good,
15:28 you probably did it with a good friend.
15:31 If you did something stupid,
15:34 you probably did it with a stupid friend.
15:37 Raise your hand if you ever had a stupid friend.
15:40 Don't point at them right now.
15:40 That's really, really rude.
15:42 Raise your hand if you ever were the stupid friend.
15:44 I was the stupid friend, right?
15:45 When I went to college,
15:47 I got mixed up with the wrong friends
15:50 and I actually became a wrong friend
15:52 and a bad influence to other people.
15:54 And what did I do with the wrong friends?
15:57 Let me tell you what I didn't do.
15:58 I didn't treat girls with integrity with the wrong friends.
16:02 I didn't love God with all my heart with the wrong friends.
16:06 I didn't have an other-centered, generous kingdom mindset
16:09 with the wrong friends.
16:11 Here's what I did with the wrong friends.
16:12 I drove very, very drunk with the wrong friends.
16:16 I got in fights with the wrong friends.
16:20 I actually got arrested with the wrong friends.
16:23 Put that on your I'm a preacher resume.
16:25 I got arrested.
16:27 And this is something that is grounded in spiritual truth.
16:30 Proverbs 13, 20 tells us, "Walk with the wise."
16:35 And what happens?
16:36 What do you, what happens?
16:36 Say it aloud.
16:37 You become wise.
16:38 Associate with dummies and what happens?
16:41 You get in trouble.
16:42 But you're gonna say,
16:43 "But I'm just a mama and I'm just a dad.
16:47 "And I've got no control over who my kids are friends with.
16:52 "I'm totally helpless.
16:54 "They just go out into the world
16:56 "and I can't do anything about it."
16:59 True, they have a lot of freedom.
17:01 But you have to remember,
17:04 even though you can't pick your children's friends,
17:08 you can influence the environments you put them in.
17:12 You can't always pick who they're gonna choose.
17:16 (congregation applauding)
17:18 But especially in the earlier years,
17:20 you have a great deal of say at where they go
17:25 and the types of environments they're gonna associate in.
17:29 And so let me just remind you, parents,
17:31 if you really want your children to be spiritually grounded,
17:33 let me just remind you, ready for this?
17:34 This is one of the greatest things.
17:35 You may wanna write this down
17:36 because some of you don't know this.
17:38 But LifeKids meets every week.
17:41 Every single week.
17:44 Like it's always there
17:46 with other people with a heart
17:51 to help your children be fully devoted to Jesus.
17:54 And also Switch, it meets on Wednesdays.
17:58 (congregation applauding)
17:59 And you have some degree of control
18:03 if you want to have your child
18:05 be around other like-minded, faith-filled teenagers
18:10 or just give it the luck of the draw
18:11 and send them out wherever.
18:13 When summer comes around, you still have some influence.
18:16 And so if you can afford it,
18:18 you may send your children to a Christ-centered camp.
18:21 Or you may say, "Hey, this summer,
18:22 "how about going on a mission trip to serve the poor?"
18:26 Or you might say to your high school,
18:27 "Hey, what about being an intern at the church?"
18:30 You can't control who they choose,
18:33 but you have some degree of influence
18:36 who they're going to be around.
18:38 And I give an example that was a pivotal time
18:41 in one of my son's life.
18:43 Both of my boys were exceptional soccer players.
18:46 And one of them was on
18:48 one of the higher level competitive teams.
18:51 The problem with that team is many of the other players
18:54 were heading in a very, very wrong direction.
18:57 And as a good player who wanted to fit in,
19:00 my son found himself vulnerable
19:02 to the direction of some of the other kids.
19:04 And so we looked at it, best team and bad influences.
19:09 What are we gonna do?
19:10 Because we love our kid, we want to be great at soccer.
19:12 He loves soccer, we want him to be great.
19:15 And we had a serious family discussion
19:17 and came to the very difficult decision
19:20 to move him off of the good team onto a lesser team
19:24 that was filled with great God honoring athletes.
19:29 Was that easy?
19:30 It was incredibly difficult.
19:32 And I'm an athlete, but remember this,
19:34 as much as I love sports,
19:37 I would rather have my son great at honoring God
19:40 than great at playing soccer.
19:41 (congregation cheering)
19:43 At some point, at some point,
19:47 if you don't make a difficult decision like that,
19:51 you may years later wonder
19:53 how things could have been different
19:55 because who they're with shapes who they become.
20:00 And so we want to work really hard
20:01 to give them every opportunity
20:03 to be in a spiritual community.
20:05 And this is why it matters so much.
20:07 There's a Ecclesiastes that said
20:08 that two are better than one.
20:10 Two are better than one.
20:12 Two people standing for Jesus are better than one.
20:14 If one falls down, the good friend can pick him up.
20:17 If one is vulnerable, the other one can have their back.
20:20 And so that's why when your kids
20:21 are in a spiritual community,
20:24 it's not just like, oh, you're so weird.
20:26 You don't drink?
20:27 Like, no, I don't drink, but we don't drink either.
20:30 I've got other friends that are kind of weird like that too.
20:32 Like, oh, wait a minute, you're saving yourself for marriage?
20:36 No, it's not just me, but there are others of us
20:39 that are saving ourselves for marriage.
20:41 And so what happens is it's not your child
20:43 out there all alone,
20:45 trying to fight off all the temptation.
20:47 They're not serving Jesus by themselves.
20:50 They're in a community of other people serving Jesus.
20:53 And suddenly it's not just your faith they have.
20:56 It's not just their faith,
20:58 but it's our faith of people that are around us.
21:02 (congregation applauding)
21:04 And that's why we wanna give them
21:05 a spiritual community worth having.
21:07 The second thing we wanna give them
21:09 is a standard worth achieving.
21:12 A standard worth achieving.
21:14 What is the goal?
21:15 When it comes to parenting,
21:20 what do we want for our children?
21:21 We want them to love the Lord
21:24 with all their heart, soul, and strength.
21:30 Not just part of their heart,
21:33 not just when it's convenient,
21:36 not when no one's making fun of them,
21:39 not when they're a youth group,
21:41 but not with their other groups of friends.
21:44 With all their hearts, all the time.
21:46 How are we gonna help them do that?
21:49 It's not by lowering the standards.
21:51 An Old Testament Jewish family,
21:54 whenever a child would turn 12,
21:56 do you know what that child would have done
21:57 by the time they're 12?
21:59 They would memorize the first five books of the Bible.
22:04 Genesis, Exodus, Leviticus, Numbers, and Deuteronomy.
22:12 They would memorize the first five books of the Bible.
22:17 And you're saying, "I can't even get my kid
22:21 "to make the bed."
22:22 And let me remind you,
22:26 if you don't expect much from your kids,
22:29 you won't get much.
22:31 If you think it's acceptable
22:33 to not even hit the baseline standard,
22:35 you're not gonna get the baseline standard.
22:38 But if you believe they are capable of more,
22:42 they will likely believe they are capable of more.
22:45 If you believe they could actually memorize
22:47 a book of the Bible,
22:49 they might not only make their bed,
22:52 but they might grow spiritually.
22:54 So how are we going to help them love the Lord,
22:56 the God with all their heart, mind, and soul is free?
22:58 It's probably not gonna come
22:59 by just making their TikTok videos, their devotions,
23:02 as they're watching somebody else on a 30-second clip.
23:04 We're gonna raise the standard
23:06 and say in our family, we're people of the Word.
23:08 So we're gonna do a YouVersion Bible plan
23:11 together as a family.
23:13 And once they do it with their family
23:15 and they're in a community,
23:16 they might start doing it with their friends.
23:19 And they're so grown with God,
23:20 they don't just have one plan,
23:22 but they've got like four or five, right?
23:24 Joy, 'cause Joy's got several groups of friends
23:26 you gotta do it with.
23:27 And they're growing in God's Word.
23:29 And then you might say,
23:30 we actually memorize God's Word.
23:32 We need to hide His Word in our hearts
23:36 so that we don't sin against Him.
23:39 Why did I say that?
23:40 Because that's actually His Word.
23:42 That when we know His Word, we become stronger.
23:45 The stronger we are in Christ,
23:47 the weaker the attacks from the evil one
23:50 will be against us with our spiritual armor.
23:54 We're gonna raise the standard.
23:55 My dad, before he was a committed Christian,
23:57 he'd say, "Grosh, don't get your girlfriend pregnant."
24:00 That's a standard, but we could raise it.
24:04 Instead of don't go hook up,
24:07 what we might say is,
24:09 let's honor God with sexual integrity.
24:12 Let's guard our eyes and guard our minds.
24:14 And let's treat the person we're dating
24:17 as if they're someone else's spouse,
24:19 because they probably will be.
24:21 And let's treat ourselves,
24:24 honor our bodies as if they belong to God,
24:26 because they do.
24:27 Instead of listening to whatever music is popular,
24:32 if it's got lyrics that take your mind
24:34 into a place that's unhealthy,
24:35 let's just be weird enough to replace it
24:38 with worship music that helps us connect with God.
24:41 Instead of just going to church every now and then,
24:44 let's see ourselves as the church.
24:47 Let's help our 13-year-old engage by serving every week.
24:51 It's gonna mess you up, 'cause if she's serving,
24:54 then you actually gotta be here more than once a month.
24:57 And if you wanna be a fully devoted follower of Christ,
24:59 you probably need to be in the house of God
25:01 more than once a month.
25:03 I'm just saying.
25:05 And so we're raising the standard.
25:09 Our goal isn't to raise the best player,
25:12 but maybe one of the strongest witnesses.
25:14 We don't want our kids just to fit in.
25:17 We actually may want them to stand out
25:20 for their faith in Jesus.
25:22 How are they gonna do it?
25:23 Not alone.
25:24 They have to have a community,
25:27 a strong spiritual community.
25:28 And we need to raise the standard and say,
25:30 you're actually capable of doing more.
25:34 You don't become a strong Christian or a minister
25:37 once you're 21.
25:38 You can be eight years old and be a witness right now.
25:41 We're gonna give them a community worth having.
25:43 We're gonna give them a standard worth achieving.
25:45 And number three, we're gonna give them a faith
25:47 worth sharing, a faith worth sharing.
25:50 When it comes to the truth of God, what do we do?
25:55 We have to have it in us, parents.
25:57 It starts with us.
25:58 And then we're gonna impress this truth on our children.
26:03 We're gonna talk about God's truths when you sit at home
26:06 and when you walk along the road and when you lie down
26:09 and when you get up.
26:11 We're gonna make conversation about God and faith
26:16 and spiritual things the most common
26:19 and normal topic in our homes.
26:25 It's not like, oh, it's Sunday now,
26:26 we gotta go put on our God face.
26:29 No, it's when we wake up
26:31 and it's over lunch on a Saturday, it's over dinner time,
26:34 and it's on the way to the dance classes.
26:37 And it's a normal part of what we do
26:39 because we want our children to have firsthand faith.
26:43 It's not secondhand, it's not ours.
26:45 And so we need to have it in ourselves.
26:48 And this becomes a challenge
26:49 because if it's not in you, they'll see it.
26:52 Because there's one thing you need to know about your kids
26:53 is if anything that they hate, they hate fake.
26:57 This generation despises hypocrisy, they hate fake,
27:01 and they have a fine, I'll call it this,
27:03 they have a finely tuned fake detector.
27:06 If it's not real, they'll sniff it out.
27:09 Who faked?
27:13 (audience laughing)
27:16 Little potty joke there for my sixth grade boys, right?
27:20 And this is the very reason why we're not gonna be
27:26 just what culture calls a normal,
27:28 cultural Christian family.
27:32 There's a lot of people today that would by name say,
27:34 yeah, we're Christians 'cause we're not something else.
27:36 Yeah, we kind of believe in God.
27:38 That's a cultural Christianity.
27:40 What we wanna be is we wanna be a Christ-centered family.
27:45 Because Jesus is not a part of our lives,
27:48 He is our lives.
27:50 He's not gonna be a part of our family
27:53 that we add on whenever it's convenient.
27:55 We call on whenever like we're in big trouble.
27:58 It's like, this is the driving force of who we are.
28:02 It's everything.
28:04 And this is what it is to me,
28:07 because of who He is,
28:11 and because of what He's done.
28:14 I'm called by God.
28:16 Everything in me wants me to impart to my children,
28:20 to my children's children, a spiritual legacy.
28:25 I want them to know who they are in Christ.
28:29 So when the devil tells them they're not and they can't,
28:31 they say, no, through Christ, I can and I am.
28:35 Whenever temptation draws them away,
28:38 they stand, no, no, no, no, no.
28:39 I have the full armor of God,
28:42 the helmet of salvation, the breastplate of righteousness,
28:44 the shield of faith, the belt of truth,
28:46 the sword of the Spirit, which is the Word of God.
28:48 My feet are planted firmly in the peace,
28:51 the gospel of His peace.
28:54 So I wanna give my family,
28:57 and it's not gonna happen accidentally.
28:59 I wanna give them, we have to work at it,
29:01 and it may take some time,
29:02 and it's never gonna be perfect,
29:04 but we wanna give them a spiritual community worth having.
29:07 And then we wanna raise the standard.
29:09 We believe there's more in you.
29:10 We wanna give them a standard worth achieving.
29:13 And then we wanna give them a faith,
29:14 the good news that you can't work your way to God,
29:16 that you'll never be good enough for God,
29:18 but anyone who calls on the name of Jesus,
29:22 you would be saved, forgiven.
29:25 That is a faith worth sharing.
29:26 I told you last week that we took our family, 17 of us.
29:31 There's 17 in the down line with in-laws.
29:34 That doesn't count dogs.
29:35 There's like 19 with dogs.
29:36 But anyway, we took 17 on a family trip,
29:39 and I told you how it was really amazing until it wasn't,
29:42 and they got in pretty big fights with each other.
29:45 And a lot of you said that made you so happy
29:48 that you liked that, which hurt my feelings,
29:51 but I'm glad that my family troubles brought you joy.
29:54 (audience laughing)
29:55 But he's like, we're so glad, Craig.
29:57 We're so glad your family screwed up too.
29:59 And it's kind of funny
30:02 because I was about to teach on parenting,
30:05 and I felt so much shame.
30:07 Like, what did I do wrong?
30:08 And I called everybody in for a family meeting.
30:12 It's pretty bad when you're calling 28-year-olds
30:14 in for a family meeting.
30:15 Sit up, shut up, sit down.
30:17 I gotta talk to you.
30:18 And we went home, and Amy and I were kind of reflecting
30:21 on it, and my son, Sam, called up.
30:23 He said, "Dad, I just wanna thank you.
30:24 I wanna brag on you."
30:25 He goes, "You and Mom are such great parents."
30:27 Like, what?
30:28 I go, "No, no, I suck."
30:30 He goes, "No, no, you're great parents."
30:32 He said, "You brought us in,
30:34 and you reminded us of who we are,
30:36 and then the next day, we were all crying and praying
30:39 and apologizing and seeking God together."
30:41 I go, "You were?
30:43 I didn't see that.
30:44 I didn't know that."
30:45 He goes, "Oh, yeah."
30:46 Isn't it amazing how God works through families?
30:48 All families fight,
30:50 but Christ-centered families fight through it.
30:52 Like, ah.
30:53 Yeah, so what's so interesting is how what felt like a low
30:58 to me was actually an environment
31:01 where spiritual roots were planted deep
31:03 and the fruit started showing.
31:05 If you're in a place that it feels like
31:07 there's a low right now,
31:08 maybe you feel like you failed, you've fallen short,
31:11 you're not there yet, the good news is
31:12 there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus,
31:14 and you can start today, and you can apologize and say,
31:18 "I'm sorry, I haven't led toward Christ,
31:21 but we're gonna do it."
31:23 And you're not always gonna get it right.
31:25 You're not always gonna be perfect,
31:27 but as we're being perfected, as we're being changed,
31:29 we can actually point towards Jesus.
31:32 And what's amazing is sometimes the most powerful moments
31:35 are not when we get it right,
31:37 but when we get it wrong,
31:39 and we apologize, and we see forgiveness,
31:42 and that's kind of at the core of the gospel,
31:45 is a God who loves imperfect people.
31:48 And so we can't get it all right,
31:49 but we can fully surrender to Jesus.
31:51 So what are we gonna do?
31:53 We're gonna raise the standard.
31:54 We're gonna love the Lord our God
31:55 with all our heart, mind, soul, and strength,
31:56 and with God's help, not just with God's help,
31:59 but with your help, with the church,
32:01 we're gonna offer the next generation of our children
32:03 a community worth having,
32:06 a standard worth achieving, and a faith worth sharing.
32:10 We need you to be a part of this, so let's do it together.
32:15 God, we ask your Holy Spirit would do
32:19 in families what only you can do.
32:21 Help us be centered around your Son, Jesus.
32:25 As you're praying today, nobody looking around,
32:29 I don't care if you're married, not married,
32:31 kids, no kids, dogs, no dogs, cats, even cats.
32:34 Those of you who say,
32:36 "I wanna be Christ-centered in the way I live,"
32:39 would you lift up your hands right now?
32:41 Online, you can just type in the comment section,
32:43 "Help me be Christ-centered."
32:45 Just go ahead and lift up your hands again.
32:46 I know you put 'em down.
32:47 Just lift 'em up for a moment,
32:48 almost as a prayer toward heaven.
32:49 Just leave 'em up, if you will.
32:51 Jesus, we honor you.
32:53 We put you first.
32:56 God, help us to do what Jesus said in Matthew's Gospel,
32:59 to seek first your kingdom and your righteousness,
33:04 and then we thank you that you'll add everything to us.
33:07 God, help us, we need help.
33:09 We're not great at this, we can't do it on our own.
33:11 Help us give parents wisdom.
33:14 Give us grace.
33:16 Give our children wisdom.
33:17 Give our children grace.
33:18 And God, even for those that aren't parents,
33:20 God, help us to see we're a part of your body.
33:22 We are discipling one another.
33:24 Help us to put you first in all that we do.
33:27 You can put your hands down now as you continue
33:29 just praying, nobody looking around.
33:31 There's some of you, you're gonna recognize
33:33 that you are like I was growing up,
33:35 like my mom was, my dad was.
33:37 We were just kinda cultural Christians.
33:40 We believed in God, but we didn't really know him.
33:44 We weren't Jesus-centered.
33:46 And Jesus says, if you want to follow me,
33:50 you lay down everything, you leave it all behind.
33:53 He actually gives a metaphor, he says,
33:55 you pick up your cross, meaning like you die to yourself,
33:57 and you follow him.
33:59 There are some of you today, I wanna tell you
34:01 about a faith that is worth sharing.
34:02 It is a God that loves you so much.
34:03 He loves you, he loves you, he loves you.
34:07 So much that he sent Jesus, his son,
34:11 the Lamb of God who is perfect in every way,
34:14 who died on a cross, the Holy One,
34:18 as a replacement, as the perfect sacrifice for our sins.
34:21 He died in our place.
34:23 He took the punishment for our sins,
34:26 and God raised him from the dead
34:28 so that anyone, and this includes you,
34:30 who calls on his name, you would be saved.
34:32 This isn't a, hey, I go to church,
34:34 I kinda try to be a good person.
34:35 No, this is a, he is Lord, and I follow him, he's my king.
34:39 Some of you, you're not even a cultural Christian,
34:41 you're like, you've been far from God,
34:42 but all of a sudden you're going,
34:43 oh my gosh, there's something here.
34:44 What is that?
34:45 That is the power of the Holy Spirit,
34:46 and that is a good God that is loving you.
34:48 And in one moment, no matter what you've done,
34:50 when you call on the name of Jesus,
34:52 his name is above every name,
34:54 our God will hear your prayer, he will forgive your sins,
34:56 and he will make you brand new today,
34:58 wherever you're watching from.
35:00 Those who say, I need his grace, I want his forgiveness,
35:03 we're gonna step away from our old life,
35:04 and we're gonna say, Jesus, I give my life to you.
35:07 If it's you today, you need his forgiveness,
35:09 you need his grace, you're ready.
35:10 Today is the day you say, Jesus, I surrender, I need you,
35:13 I give my life to you, that's your prayer.
35:15 Lift your hands high right now,
35:16 all over the place, lift them up and say, yes.
35:18 Praise God for you guys saying yes today,
35:21 as we have people in all of our churches
35:23 calling on his name.
35:25 We thank God for you.
35:27 Online, just type in the comment section,
35:29 I am surrendering my life to Jesus.
35:31 Type that in the comments,
35:33 I'm surrendering my life to Jesus.
35:35 And as we have people being made anew,
35:37 would you pray aloud wherever you are?
35:38 Pray, heavenly Father, take my life,
35:42 Jesus, forgive my sins, make me new,
35:47 fill me with your spirit, so I could know you,
35:51 and love you, and honor you with my whole heart.
35:55 Thank you for new life, I give it all to you.
35:59 In Jesus' name I pray.
36:03 Could somebody celebrate big right now?
36:04 Welcome those born into God's family.
36:06 Come on, church.
36:07 (audience applauding)
36:10 (audience applauding)