• last year
Washed up British film director, Emil, who is invited by a nascent state to make a national Epic in an obscure Caucasus | dG1faXBCTmp3dU13YWM
Transcript
00:00 Lie down. Start to breathe. Close your eyes. Go deeper into that quiet realm. You are at peace.
00:10 Fuck off!
00:11 Hello, Emil Thorsten.
00:13 So which one is better?
00:14 Depends whether you want a more powerful drill or want the bus locked before you recharge.
00:19 I am calling for autonomous Republic of Karastan.
00:21 Sorry, where?
00:22 My shoes.
00:23 Problem.
00:24 Come on, where are my shoes? I'm here for the film festivals!
00:26 Welcome to Karastan.
00:28 Why are there so many tanks?
00:30 We like tanks.
00:32 You want me to direct your national epic?
00:36 You are a genius.
00:38 Don't disagree with me.
00:40 People who disagree with me get shot.
00:42 Who's your favorite person on TV?
00:45 Skupce.
00:46 Who's that? Sort of famous Karastani actor?
00:48 It is Kartundog.
00:50 Where's the toilet?
00:51 Are you serious? How come I've got all of the weapons we knew in the last guy?
00:56 Last guy could have planted a gun on you.
00:58 Hey listen, I thought you were really good in Resident Evil 3.
01:02 Yeah, no, I wasn't in Resident Evil 3.
01:04 To be fair, it's difficult to work with a script like this.
01:07 I wrote the script.
01:08 Taner is the hero who united Karastan in the 14th century.
01:11 His mother was killed by marauding Circassians.
01:14 Are you alright?
01:15 Fire! Fire!
01:17 He was bothered by an eagle.
01:19 It's a true story.
01:20 Okay, the eagle has to land on the rocks by the baby.
01:24 The politics of lies.
01:26 You can smile and shit in your mouth at the same time.
01:30 Our actor has been kidnapped.
01:32 And everyone is lying to me!
01:33 I'm beginning to feel like everybody knows something and I'm the only one in the dark.
01:37 Pick up your shit, I will.
01:44 It's not breathing.
01:49 Man, she's it.
01:50 Here, if you want it, you can have it because I own it.
01:53 I mean, the people own it, but I own the people.
01:56 Taner!
01:57 (dramatic music)
01:59 (explosion)