Credit: SWNS / Laura Amies
A child expert has revealed a simple mistake parents make while calming their baby which actually makes them cry MORE - and what you should do instead.
Former nanny Laura Amies, 39, say's never give them the toy they're screaming for - such as an iPad - because this makes things worse in the long run.
The consultant from Doncaster, South Yorkshire, said the best thing to do is soothe the child by supporting them emotionally, such as hugging and sitting with them.
A video shared on TikTok went viral, amassing nearly two million views, of Laura sharing the harsh truth - and the reactions were mixed.
A child expert has revealed a simple mistake parents make while calming their baby which actually makes them cry MORE - and what you should do instead.
Former nanny Laura Amies, 39, say's never give them the toy they're screaming for - such as an iPad - because this makes things worse in the long run.
The consultant from Doncaster, South Yorkshire, said the best thing to do is soothe the child by supporting them emotionally, such as hugging and sitting with them.
A video shared on TikTok went viral, amassing nearly two million views, of Laura sharing the harsh truth - and the reactions were mixed.
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LifestyleTranscript
00:00 [Music]
00:19 Top tips for avoiding tantrums whilst out and about with toddlers.
00:22 Now, small disclaimer, of course we cannot avoid all tantrums
00:25 and to be completely honest with you, we should not even attempt to.
00:28 Tip one is all about perspective. Now, of course you're not going to be at the zoo every day
00:31 but generally speaking, your perspective is very different to that of your toddler's.
00:35 So if they're getting frustrated and a bit fidgety in there, bugging you can't get them out,
00:39 drop to their level, offer them some eye contact, high quality attention, even just for ten seconds
00:44 and you can prevent some of that attention seeking behaviour.
00:47 [Music]
00:55 Tip two, wherever humanly possible, allow them just to have a little bit of control
00:59 and a bit of sway in terms of the direction you travel or, I don't know, a choice.
01:04 They are developmentally geared up to have an impact on the environment
01:07 and sadly if they don't get opportunities to do so, they will become balls of frustration
01:12 and boy will you know about it.
01:13 Tip three here is the transition, when you have to leave something that they don't want to do,
01:18 making it smoother for them. So we made a big song and dance about saying goodbye to the bears
01:23 because that was fun.
01:25 Tip four, you're not going to like it, buckle up, but generally speaking,
01:28 I try to eat the exact same foods as them because it creates that sense of teamwork.
01:33 Now tip five, get them involved. Give them a job that makes them feel empowered.
01:38 She was thrilled when I asked her to put her own rubbish in the bin.
01:42 It showed her I had faith in her and let me tell you that goes a very long way.
01:47 Now tip six, important one, don't ever try to just put something off because you think they'll cry.
01:54 She didn't want to go home, but you know what, we had to go home.
01:56 It was nap time, so don't put off the jobs just because they may cry.
02:00 So your child starts here. They're fine, happy-go-lucky, playing or watching the TV,
02:05 whatever they're doing, everything's hunky-dory.
02:07 Then there's a trigger, something that sets them off.
02:12 Then to the bargaining stage, and this is where they start to up volume levels slightly.
02:19 They're starting to get a little bit testy.
02:22 They're trying to get rid of this trigger that started.
02:26 And if that trigger doesn't dissipate, they're going to reach the escalation phase.
02:31 This is where we must buckle up.
02:34 The volume is loud where there might be some kicking, some screaming, some slamming.
02:39 The acceptance stage.
02:42 Now this is where they start figuring out that life is not so tough after all.
02:46 We're still a little bit sad, but we're getting there.
02:51 And then slowly but surely we make it down to the detachment stage.
02:55 And that, my friends, is where your little tinker has gone from
03:00 absolutely having the most horrendous, life-altering, shattering tantrum to
03:07 playing with their teapot.
03:09 [ Silence ]