• last year
Follows incompetent Greek-Cypriot lettings agent Stath, who works for the family business, Michael and Eagle. While Stat | dHNfMjVuenYxRDRBTzg

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Transcript
00:00 Michael and Igor Lettings.
00:02 Nope, no one's in.
00:03 Oh, is it okay if I wear,
00:04 I've got football kit on underneath,
00:05 so I hope that's not annoying.
00:06 I've got an interagency football sort of thing
00:08 after this. - No, it's cool, man.
00:09 I've just come from the gym, you know, had a little sesh.
00:11 So we're both a bit sporty.
00:13 - Bit, ah, we are a bit sporty, yeah.
00:16 In the middle of that, you went,
00:19 had a little sesh, love things like that.
00:22 I always wanna say things like that.
00:24 Unfortunately, there's not a lot of space on the floor
00:28 to do sort of exercises and workout stuff,
00:31 but there's like, it's quite a big bed,
00:32 so you could do plenty of exercises in the bed,
00:34 and yeah, you know what I mean?
00:36 Yeah.
00:37 - What sort of exercises do you mean?
00:39 (laughing)
00:42 - I don't know.
00:44 - Oh, I'm all right, Cherry.
00:46 I've been using my own key for my flat.
00:48 Oh, bloody hell, Silly Billy Awards.
00:51 I win the Silly Billy Awards.
00:54 Oh, oh, it's nice.
00:58 - Crap!
00:58 - Sorry, what are you doing?
00:59 - I was just trying to get some excitement in my life,
01:03 a little spooky scare.
01:04 So I'm Stafford, I'm letting agent
01:06 from Michael Neagle Lettings.
01:06 You do, who are you?
01:08 Coming out of my way.
01:10 - 14B, Needham Road.
01:21 - Sorry I'm late, I just ran over there.
01:22 It is a nice kitchen, yeah.
01:23 Well, we should have a quick look at the rest of it.
01:25 So I'll take you through to the bedroom.
01:27 That is not a door, that's not a door.
01:31 That is, what is that?
01:32 Sort of a wobbly wall, which I like a lot, actually.
01:36 We could just have that there for a quick wobble.
01:39 And where is the bedroom?
01:40 - It's a bit tricky to find in the property.
01:43 - Sorry?
01:44 - No, what did I show you around
01:47 while I'm trying to find the code button?
01:49 Yeah, so this bench is actually very good for sitting on
01:54 and also to put your shoes.
01:56 It actually reminds me of a bench from a school in PE, Helen.
02:01 Does it remind you of being in PE, Helen?
02:03 Michael Neagle Lettings.
02:05 This is a feature up here that we tried to get rid of,
02:08 but in the end we decided we loved it.
02:11 And as you can see, there's an absolutely shower.
02:14 I mean, why have they put the television here?
02:16 Who's watching TV like that?
02:18 Just making sure there's no one in the bathroom.
02:20 Oh, blimey, there's a man in the bath,
02:21 I can see his willy.
02:23 No, no, no, just joking. It's a lovely bath.
02:25 There's no willies.
02:26 Imagine you have a party.
02:27 Look how many people you fit in.
02:28 One, two, three, four, five, six, seven.
02:32 And then that's seven.
02:33 And then you step aside, that's 14.
02:35 And then, what's another seven?
02:37 - 21. - 21.
02:39 Any water that might get on the-
02:40 No!
02:41 You are going to love this.
02:46 - It's a bit damp in the wall, though.
02:47 - No, no, no, no, no, no.
02:48 It's not, it's not damp.
02:51 You just don't want to have the tissue paper
02:54 laying against the wall because it's going to get wet
02:57 because the wall is damp.
02:59 Do you want to take the flat?
03:02 I think we need to have a chat.
03:03 There's a few more places we need to look.
03:05 Do you want to take the flat?
03:07 No.
03:09 Don't.
03:10 Careful.
03:15 I mean, that's basically everything you need to see.
03:18 Well, we haven't seen this cupboard.
03:19 Good quality.
03:21 Um, yeah, just quickly, quick, quick lift.
03:26 Mate, I will.
03:38 Don't do that, mate.
03:42 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
03:43 Oh, lovely.
03:44 Let's get these lights on.
03:48 Ah, yes, the electric actually runs on a meter.
03:52 So we don't like to top it up
03:53 because we like it to be a nice treat
03:55 for you to be the first person who gets to turn the light on
03:58 if you rent the flat.
04:00 - So the lights don't work.
04:02 - Did I say that?
04:03 Unfortunately, there isn't actually windows
04:07 in this property, but you can,
04:10 if you just touch this surface very nicely,
04:14 you'll be able to see that it's actually a very soft chair.
04:18 If you grasp hold of this,
04:21 I believe it to be a long stick.
04:24 No, that's the full--
04:25 - Helen, does it work?
04:26 - Does the bench remind you of being in PE at school, Helen?
04:31 - Can you just turn that alarm off?
04:32 - Yeah, with the code.
04:33 But does, I say, does the bench remind you of being in PE?
04:36 - It doesn't work.
04:37 - Does the bench remind you of being in PE, Helen?
04:40 It's a cupboard with red,
04:42 I don't know why I'm guessing the colour.
04:44 (door creaking)
04:46 - Huh?
04:50 - How on earth did I get in there?
04:53 I thought I was in here with you.
04:55 Sometimes it's annoying to just have windows on the walls
04:57 so you can just like see what's going on outside your house.
05:01 And that's why we've popped one up on the ceiling
05:03 and only one on the ceiling.
05:05 From there, you can see everything in the sky.
05:08 Oh, and she's open, you've been here before.
05:10 How did he do that, honestly?
05:13 That's about as far as it goes.
05:15 But, and that's the bedroom.
05:17 Yes, it's very small,
05:20 but it's really just the case of wriggling in.
05:21 One, two, three, four, five, six.
05:24 (door creaking)
05:24 - Are you okay?
05:25 - Yeah, fine.
05:26 It's this bloody thing.
05:27 Oh, that's right, the table again.
05:28 And it's got everything nearby.
05:29 You've got your bedroom,
05:30 you can just lie back onto your bed,
05:31 or you can have a quick shower
05:32 if you're getting a bit sweaty from the food,
05:33 or you can pop to the toilet, Helen.
05:36 Don't stop doing that.
05:37 So we've got Sarah and Mitchell.
05:39 - Oh, no, sorry, so I'm Alice.
05:40 - Alice, which is having a baby.
05:42 Pinch for good luck.
05:44 No, and this is my dude.
05:46 - Tristan.
05:46 - Tristan.
05:47 - Crispin, like crisps.
05:48 (laughing)
05:50 - No, no, with a T.
05:51 - No, crisps is with a C.
05:53 Okay, number 22, let's get in there.
05:56 - That's number seven, you idiot.
05:57 - I know, I'm telling them, I'm showing them the area.
06:00 So you go, here, here, here, here, here, here, here.
06:04 And let's go see number 22.
06:07 (door slamming)
06:08 - That's too much.
06:10 That's a toilet, not bedroom.
06:11 That is obviously not a bedroom, that is a shower.
06:14 And that leads directly onto the kitchen.
06:16 - That's a nice kitchen.
06:17 - Okay, we've got sandwich on the shelf.
06:21 Wow, wow, wow.
06:23 - I wanna whip you through all this,
06:24 because the inside of the flat is spectacular,
06:27 but the outside truly is a absolutely garden.
06:31 You could even have a garden birth.
06:33 Sounds mad, obviously,
06:34 but people do birth in a very strange places.
06:37 I saw a thing about a woman, gave birth into a bottle.
06:40 (lid clinking)
06:43 - Okay, let's get you outside.
06:45 Welcome to the garden of an Eden.
06:49 What? No.
06:49 (dog barking)
06:52 (man grunting)
06:55 Do you mind, do you mind going away for ages?
07:04 (gentle music)
07:07 (upbeat music)
07:10 [BLANK_AUDIO]

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