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Well, your parents understood these jokes! For this list, we’ll be looking at the most adult-oriented jokes in kids movies that, in hindsight, seem inappropriate or too racy for kids.
Transcript
00:00 "I thought the Earth wasn't supposed to move until the honeymoon."
00:03 Welcome to WatchMojo, and today we're counting down our picks for the Top 20 Hidden Jokes
00:09 in Kids Movies That Ruined Your Childhood.
00:11 "Hey cutie!
00:12 Wanna pollinate with a real bug?
00:15 For this list, we'll be looking at the most adult-oriented jokes in kids movies that,
00:20 in hindsight, seem inappropriate or too racy for kids.
00:25 Which of these jokes did you catch on first viewing?
00:28 Let us know in the comments.
00:30 Number 20.
00:31 The Boss' Baby – How the Grinch Stole Christmas
00:34 Towards the beginning of this live-action adaptation, we learn where babies come from
00:38 in the world of Whoville.
00:39 Thankfully, it's not a Who sex ed lesson.
00:42 Who babies float in from the sky in an umbrella basket?
00:45 Or pumbercellas?
00:46 It's sort of like a variation on the old story of babies being delivered by storks.
00:51 Innocent right?
00:52 But this film comes armed with plenty of adult appeal.
00:55 And so as the first baby is discovered on the doorstep by its presumed father-to-be,
01:00 we get a not-so-wholesome revelation.
01:10 Most kids hopefully aren't familiar with the concept of extramarital workplace affairs,
01:14 but it definitely gets a laugh if you rewatch the film when you're older.
01:17 Number 19.
01:19 Like Rabbits – Zootopia Rabbits are known for many things.
01:22 They're cute and cuddly.
01:24 They're a popular symbol for speed.
01:26 And veering into slightly more adult territory, they're also known to be seriously prolific
01:30 procreators.
01:31 Meaning, they have a lot of babies and do it quickly.
01:34 When Officer Judy Hopps calls Nick Wilde out for tax evasion, she throws in a little species-specific
01:39 sexual innuendo.
01:43 He'd previously called her a "dumb bunny," but this mental math shows that she's anything
01:52 but.
01:53 When she can question her calculations, she reminds him that bunnies are good at multiplying.
01:58 We adults see what you did there, Disney, and it was funny stuff.
02:01 Number 18.
02:03 Sugar Honey Iced Tea – Madagascar You can squeeze a lot of sexual innuendo and
02:08 other types of adult jokes into movies for kids.
02:10 Swearing, however, is one of the big no-no's.
02:13 Foul language is all but guaranteed to get you a PG-13 rating, higher if it's sexually
02:18 related.
02:19 But screenwriters are a creative bunch, so they usually manage to find non-traditional
02:23 ways to fill the void left by the absence of swear words.
02:28 In Madagascar, Chris Rock's character, Marty the Zebra, says a series of words that, although
02:33 innocent at face value, come together as a convenient acronym.
02:37 Sugar Honey Iced Tea, S-H-I-T.
02:39 Those sneaky writers.
02:41 Number 17.
02:43 Rex to Rachel – Ice Age Dawn of the Dinosaurs The third installment in 20th Century Fox's
02:49 largely successful Ice Age film franchise introduced Simon Pegg's Buck, a one-eyed
02:54 weasel with a habit of going after creatures much larger than himself.
02:58 This dinosaur hunter is more than a little rough around the edges, and seems utterly
03:02 without mercy or remorse when it comes to his life calling.
03:06 At one point, he regales Manny, Diego, and company with tales of his exploits, and quite
03:10 frankly it sounds like something out of a gory horror film.
03:19 Though it's played for a laugh, he's talking about castrating a T-Rex.
03:23 This is one messed up weasel.
03:26 Number 16.
03:27 A Dirty Ho – The Cat in the Hat Like 2000's How the Grinch Stole Christmas,
03:32 this live-action adaptation aimed to take a Dr. Seuss classic and turn it into a feature-length
03:36 film that would appeal to kids and adults alike.
03:40 Unfortunately, it wasn't nearly as successful as The Grinch, and although there's a plethora
03:45 of adult-oriented jokes, they're far from subtle.
03:49 After landing in the yard and threatening two dogs, Mike Myers' titular cat in the
03:52 hat looks at the garden tool he's been brandishing and aggressively calls it a "dirty hoe"
03:57 before smiling knowingly at the camera.
04:06 Kids likely thought nothing of it, but for adults, it's a surprisingly random and inappropriate
04:10 bit of wordplay.
04:12 Number 15.
04:13 Flying High – The Santa Claus In 1994, Tim Allen starred in this critically
04:18 acclaimed Christmas film and box office success.
04:21 It's become something of a classic in the decades since, and is undeniably a fun film
04:25 for the whole family.
04:33 Of course, like so many family films, it squeezes in a few jokes just for the adults.
04:38 When Tim Allen's character, Scott Calvin, starts flying, he reassures his son that he's
04:42 fine because of past experience.
04:52 Apparently Mr. Calvin did some hard partying and experimentation with drugs before becoming
04:56 the suit and tie we meet in the film.
04:58 Adding to the joke is the fact that Tim Allen was actually arrested for drug trafficking
05:02 in the 70s.
05:03 Number 14.
05:05 Busy Boy – 101 Dalmatians Cruella de Vil has always been a memorable
05:10 villain, but Glenn Close makes us really love to hate the character.
05:13 She oozes malice and villainous charisma, delivering many a memorable line.
05:18 There's one statement in particular that children in the audience likely thought nothing
05:22 of, but would surely raise the eyebrows of their accompanying parents.
05:31 When she learns that Roger and Anita are expecting puppies in addition to a child, she says that
05:35 Roger has been a "busy boy."
05:37 Is she suggesting Roger had something to do with the puppies?
05:41 Gross Cruella, really gross.
05:48 Number 13.
05:49 A Compromising Position – The Road to El Dorado
05:53 This film follows troublemakers Miguel and Tulio, who, in 1519, travel from Spain to
05:58 the New World, armed with a map to the City of Gold.
06:01 Naturally, nothing goes as planned, but being the conmen that they are, they usually manage
06:06 to spin the unexpected in their favor.
06:08 When a local woman by the name of Chell enters the picture, however, things get even more
06:12 complicated.
06:13 It turns out that Chell can be just as manipulative as Miguel and Tulio.
06:17 When she initiates a massage with Tulio, it quickly escalates to something far more suggestive
06:22 off-camera.
06:23 And based on the sounds, Tulio's expression and their body positions, well, you get the
06:28 idea.
06:31 Number 12.
06:32 The Topless Woman – The Rescuers
06:34 Rumors abound about inappropriate content being snuck into Disney films, from the phallic
06:39 towers in The Little Mermaid to that much-debated line from Aladdin.
06:43 However, there's nothing subjective about this adult addition to 1977's The Rescuers.
06:55 In 1999, a massive recall of VHS copies of the film was announced due to an inappropriate
07:01 image which had been added to the film in post-production.
07:04 Disney initially refused to say what the offensive image was, but word got out fast that it was
07:08 a picture of a real-life topless woman in an apartment window, visible as our mouse
07:12 protagonists Bernard and Bianca fly by.
07:15 Incredibly, this was in the original version of the film.
07:18 Number 11.
07:19 A Lemon Party – Cars 2
07:21 Pixar's Cars franchise has never shied away from sliding in a few raunchy jokes for the
07:25 adults.
07:26 In the first film, there's a deleted scene of a road sign for a "top-down truck stop"
07:35 that advertises all convertible waitresses.
07:38 In a world inhabited by automobiles, this is clearly intended as a topless bar-restaurant.
07:44 Without a doubt, the dirtiest joke in the entire series, however, is "the lemon party."
07:49 This likely went right over the heads of most adult viewers.
07:52 Lemon Party is a reference to an early 2000s shock website that depicted a bunch of old
07:57 men attending a sex party.
08:00 We'd like to think that this was just a coincidence, but the internet has deemed that
08:07 unlikely.
08:09 Number 10.
08:10 A Castle That's Compensating for Shortcomings – Shrek
08:20 Part of what's made this beloved animated franchise so successful is its ability to
08:25 balance kid-friendly jokes with adult-oriented references, and knowing winks.
08:30 With that being said, there are a few moments that might raise some eyebrows in hindsight.
08:38 For example, there's this scene that really makes it seem like Lord Farquaad is getting
08:43 a little too excited while looking at Princess Fiona's picture.
08:47 Thankfully, viewers can't see any movement in the sheets, so maybe Shrek wasn't so
08:51 far off the mark when he made his locker room joke about a big castle for a little man.
08:55 It might have just been a jab at Farquaad's height, but we doubt it.
09:04 Number 9.
09:05 Evil Desires – Hocus Pocus There are a number of jokes meant for adults
09:13 in this classic Halloween film, like references to Max's virginity and Emily talking about
09:18 Allison's yabbos.
09:24 But there's no moment more inappropriate than when the witches announce their desire
09:27 for children.
09:32 To be clear, they want to kill them to steal their youth, but this horny bus driver just
09:36 sees it as an invitation to test his virility.
09:39 He makes it clear that he's more than willing to oblige the strange trio.
09:42 The life of a bus driver can be a lonely one, so who knows, maybe he was just hoping for
09:47 some quality conversation.
09:54 Number 8.
09:55 A House with Female Anatomy – Monster House So, who thought it was a good idea to let
10:02 Rick and Morty creator Dan Harmon co-write the screenplay for a kids' film?
10:07 To be fair, this was years before he created Rick and Morty, or even Community for that
10:11 matter, but still, the man isn't exactly the kind to play it safe.
10:15 This is the sort of joke that's guaranteed to go over the head of pretty much every kid
10:18 in the audience, but we suspect the parents who caught it choked on their popcorn or soda.
10:23 Monster House is a solid, fun, and often intelligent film, but this reference to the female anatomy
10:28 was a risky inclusion.
10:35 Number 7.
10:37 Performance Issues – Space Jam Apparently in the world of Space Jam, talent
10:45 is like energy.
10:46 It can't just be created out of nothing, and so in order to win this epic high-stakes
10:50 basketball game, the monsters steal the talent of professional b-ballers Charles Barkley,
10:55 Sean Bradley, Patrick Ewing, Larry Johnson, and Muggsy Bogues.
10:59 Suddenly, without the skills that made them stars, the players undergo a battery of physical
11:04 and mental exams in this funny montage.
11:14 The filmmakers managed to slide an adult joke into the mix when one doctor asks a player
11:19 if he's had other performance issues.
11:22 Not cool, doc.
11:27 Number 6.
11:28 Something Mr. Potato Head Doesn't Like to Share – Toy Story 3
11:38 Pixar has never shied away from slipping adult jokes into their films, and for the most part,
11:43 they play well.
11:44 This line, however, is so crude that we really hope it was accidental.
11:48 In the third Toy Story film, the villainous Lotso removes the mouth of an understandably
11:52 angry Mrs. Potato Head.
11:54 Jumping to his wife's defense, Mr. Potato Head loudly declares that nobody takes his
12:00 wife's mouth.
12:01 Nothing wrong with that, right?
12:02 But then he follows it up with the words "except me".
12:09 Literally he might just be saying that he steals his wife's mouth to get some peace
12:12 and quiet, but it also evokes another pretty horrifying mental image.
12:20 Number 5.
12:21 Something Mr. Potato Head Sucked to Death – The Brave Little Toaster
12:28 This 1987 animated film had some pretty heavy moments that likely left a lasting impression
12:33 on you as a young child.
12:35 The scene in the spare parts shop is horrific, and the song "Worthless" comes paired
12:39 with some similarly upsetting imagery.
12:41 The clown was pure nightmare fuel.
12:43 But nothing quite compares to the fate of the air conditioner.
12:47 While his explosive final moments are likely what stuck with you, he also says something
12:51 rather provocative to the vacuum cleaner before making his exit.
12:55 When Kirby confronts the aggressive appliance, the AC asks if Kirby is going to suck him
13:00 to death.
13:01 That's an uncomfortable choice of words.
13:04 Number 4.
13:05 The Chef with a Tiny Little Something – Ratatouille
13:12 Another Pixar film, another joke that soars over the heads of younger viewers, while raising
13:17 the eyebrows of their parents.
13:18 When the bumbling and culinary-challenged Linguini tries to come clean with Colette,
13:23 he struggles to explain his situation with Remy the cooking rat.
13:26 By his own admission, he's not good with words.
13:28 But boy does he ever misspeak here.
13:35 He admits he has a disturbing secret.
13:37 A tiny little… before he can say chef, Colette has already glanced down straight at his crotch.
13:46 At least as embarrassing as the moment is, it's not as gross as what Chef Skinner seems
13:50 to be suggesting with this line about intimacy and vegetables.
13:58 Number 3.
13:59 Diaper Humor – The Rugrats Movie
14:04 In a list of all the places we didn't expect to come across a circumcision joke, the 1998
14:09 Rugrats movie would be pretty high up there.
14:11 But there it is nonetheless.
14:13 In this musical number, a newborn baby is disappointed and outraged that he's had
14:17 his umbilical cord cut.
14:19 But another newborn in the room looks down in his own diaper and tells the baby to consider
14:23 himself fortunate.
14:24 There's nothing subtle about this reference, and we can't help but wonder what kids made
14:28 of it when they watched the scene.
14:32 Number 2.
14:33 Nice Headlights – Cars
14:35 Alright, we can see how this was a tempting joke to make, even though it's totally inappropriate.
14:47 After a big race, rookie Lightning McQueen is bathing in the attention of the fans and
14:51 cameras when two gushing young girl cars burst through the crowd and introduce themselves
14:56 as Mia and Tia.
14:57 They're his biggest fans, so what do they do?
14:59 Pop their headlights and flash him.
15:02 Get it?
15:03 Arrogant McQueen is in heaven, but we're guessing this one might have elicited more
15:06 groans from the parents than laughs.
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15:27 Number 1.
15:28 Buzz Experiences Involuntary Wingspring – Toy Story 2
15:37 There are a lot of ways to show that characters in kids' movies are attracted to one another.
15:42 After all, romance and attraction are perfectly natural.
15:44 But this scene from the second Toy Story movie is more than a little brazen.
15:48 When Buzz meets Jessie the cowgirl, it's clear that he's into her, especially from
15:52 the way he freezes when she puts her hand on his chest.
15:55 But when he sees her in action, it proves too much and he gets sprung, as shown by his
16:00 wings popping out.
16:01 It's a strangely common trope in kids' movies, also seen in The Little Rascals, and
16:05 arguably dating all the way back to 1942's Bambi.
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