Long-distance relationships are extremely common. An estimated 75% of college students will be in a long-distance relationship at some point during university. While some long-distance relationships start out that way when couples meet online, this video focuses on the transition from close-distance to long-distance relationships. That being said, the last three stages apply to any type of long-distance relationship. So, here are 7 stages in a long-distance relationship.
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00:00 Hey there Psych2Go family! We at Psych2Go are grateful and humbled by your love and support.
00:05 Here at Psych2Go, our mission is to make content on mental health and self-help more accessible
00:09 to everyone. So, let's continue to navigate everyday psychology. Research shows an estimated
00:16 75% of college students will be in a long-distance relationship at some point during university.
00:22 Even though social media, messaging apps, and video calls make it easy for couples to stay
00:26 connected while apart for extended periods of time, long-distance relationships are anything
00:32 but easy. Studies have shown higher breakup rates in long-distance relationships than
00:37 close-distance ones. Oh dear. While some long-distance relationships even start out that
00:43 way when couples meet online, others transition from close-distance to long-distance relationships.
00:48 Here are seven stages in a long-distance relationship.
00:52 1. Decision The first chapter in the book of long-distance
00:57 relationships is the decision to try to make long-distance work. When one partner lives far
01:02 away or is faced with an opportunity or obligation that requires travel, and the other partner cannot
01:08 or chooses not to go with them, the couple has to choose between breaking up or entering into a
01:13 long-distance relationship. Common factors that cause couples to consider a long-distance relationship
01:18 are travel due to job description or promotions, a partner in the military, education, an emergency,
01:25 or family members moving. During the decision stage, partners evaluate whether they want to
01:30 commit to a long-distance relationship, and others decide it's best to simply end the relationship.
01:36 2. Parting Once both partners have agreed to pursue a
01:41 long-distance relationship, so begins the second chapter titled "Parting." They'll try to spend
01:48 every minute together before they're separated to make up for the weeks, months, or years they'll
01:52 spend apart. This is also the stage where partners should set boundaries and make rules to keep the
01:57 relationship healthy when it transitions to long-distance. 3. Transition
02:03 The transition stage comes after one or both partners have left, launching the long-distance
02:10 part of the relationship. In this stage, partners might be in a state of denial or simply too busy
02:16 with the practicals of moving and adjusting to life without their partner to dwell on how the
02:20 relationship has changed. They'll probably message or call their partner frequently and keep them
02:25 updated on every little thing. They might still feel like they're still in a close-distance
02:30 relationship. 4. Realization
02:34 Were you just about to call them to meet you for coffee? Has the fact that you can't meet up with
02:39 them whenever you like just kind of sunk in? Do you feel at a loss because you could really use a
02:45 hug from them right now? If so, you've now entered the next chapter. Realization. During this stage,
02:53 couples begin to process what life is like without their partner. They must face the reality that
02:58 they can't depend on their partner to be there for them physically anymore. The realization stage,
03:04 while painful, also teaches partners to be more independent, have better time management,
03:09 and improve their communication. 5. Jealousy
03:13 Did they just post a photo of them having fun at the beach with new friends? Are they planning to
03:18 go to an event with their new colleagues? Like, really? Here you are not being able to even eat
03:24 properly because you miss them so much while they've already made new friends. Jealousy is
03:29 a common stage in long-distance relationships. In a study, 125 US college students who had been
03:35 or were currently in long-distance relationships concluded that jealousy was the most commonly
03:41 experienced negative emotion while they were apart. Participants in the study reported feeling
03:46 jealous not only of potential romantic interests but also of friends and family who got to spend
03:51 more time with their significant other than they did. 6. Doubt
03:56 Now comes the climax. Relational uncertainty is another typical stage in long-distance
04:02 relationships. Long-distance partners reported that the longer they went without seeing their
04:07 partner face-to-face, the greater their relationship uncertainty became. And if one
04:12 or both partners have doubts about their relationship before the transition to long-distance,
04:16 their relationship has a weaker chance of surviving. 7. Validation
04:23 Validation is the last chapter in the book. Partners in a successful long-distance
04:28 relationship will find themselves returning to this stage again and again. While the unsuccessful
04:34 ones might end in stage 6, doubt, studies showed that the long-distance partners are just as
04:39 satisfied with their relationships as close-distance partners when their partner actively listened to
04:44 them and responded in positive ways. This means although long-distance partners were not face-to-
04:49 face, they still felt like their relationship improved after phone or online communication,
04:55 as long as they could tell their partner supported them. This study points to the importance of
05:00 disclosure and open and honest conversations in long-distance relationships to build trust
05:05 and validation. Long-distance relationships are high maintenance, but very rewarding. Once
05:12 partners decide to commit to a long-distance relationship, they'll inevitably go through new
05:16 experiences without their partner. Long-distance relationships may come with jealousy and doubts,
05:22 but they also offer an opportunity for partners to step back and reevaluate their relationship.
05:27 And if they find themselves choosing each other again and again, then the relationship has a
05:32 strong chance of working out. Are you in a long-distance relationship now? Have you observed
05:37 these stages in such relationships around you? Do let us know in the comments below. Also,
05:42 remember to like and share this video with those who are or in the near future might be in a
05:46 long-distance relationship. Don't forget to subscribe to Psych2Go and hit the notification
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