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00:00:30♪♪
00:00:51♪♪
00:01:05♪ Place like home, oh there's no place like home, there's no place like home, there's no place like home. ♪
00:01:15Willie! Willie!
00:01:17Don't call me Willie!
00:01:19I'll call you anything I like, and you get out of that bathtub. You've been an hour.
00:01:23I could jump in the lake.
00:01:26If you don't get out of there this minute, I'll tell Ma.
00:01:29There's no place like home.
00:01:34Ma! Ma!
00:01:37What is it, Edna?
00:01:39Willie won't get out of the bathtub, and I want to take my bath. I've got a date tonight.
00:01:43Well, I'm sure if you tell him that, dear, he'll hurry.
00:01:48I'll answer it.
00:01:56Hello? Yes?
00:02:00Uh-huh, this is Peaches.
00:02:07You get away from here, you goggle-eyed, dizzy goof, and let me alone.
00:02:11Don't you dare talk to me like that, Willie Wallace, or I'll... I'll slap you.
00:02:17And you get out of that tub this minute.
00:02:19There's no place like home.
00:02:27Mother!
00:02:28What is it, dear?
00:02:29Will you please order that little brat out of the bathtub?
00:02:32Don't speak that way of your brother, Mary.
00:02:34Well, he is. He's a selfish, inconsiderate, uncouth animal.
00:02:38Will you please shut up?
00:02:40Oh, I didn't mean you, Al.
00:02:44Other people in this family are entitled to consideration.
00:02:47I have a guest coming tonight, and I want to be dressed early.
00:02:50Oh, for Pete's sake, stop broadcasting.
00:02:53Oh, no, Al, not you.
00:02:56I don't see why Father doesn't have another bath built in this house.
00:02:59It's archaic.
00:03:03It's uncivilized to expect a family of this size to be dependent on one bathtub.
00:03:07Well, you had all afternoon to take your bath, didn't you?
00:03:10That doesn't concern you?
00:03:12It does, and what am I supposed to do?
00:03:14Come home from the football game and use the garden hose?
00:03:18George!
00:03:20George, that's unfair. It was my turn.
00:03:23Hey, Mom! Mom!
00:03:26What is it, Willie?
00:03:27Did the laundry come home?
00:03:28Yes, your things are on your dresser.
00:03:30You'd better change to your long drawers.
00:03:33Aw, gee, Mom, no guy over ten years old wears long drawers.
00:03:36Will you stop talking about long drawers?
00:03:41No, Al, not you.
00:03:43Willie?
00:03:44You're not over your cold yet. You do what I say.
00:03:47Oh, listen.
00:03:48All right, Al, I'll come right over. Bye.
00:03:51Oh, so you finally got out of the bathtub.
00:03:53Well, now maybe I can take a bath.
00:03:55Quiet, insect.
00:03:57If you used up all the hot water, I'll get even with you, Willie.
00:04:00Don't call me Willie, you gaga.
00:04:02I hope it's so cold it gives you goose pimples.
00:04:05Hey, Mom, I don't want to wear long drawers.
00:04:11Who's in there?
00:04:12Get away from here and quit annoying me.
00:04:15Oh, George, you mean think I've got a date.
00:04:17Go on, chase yourself.
00:04:22Ladies and gentlemen, tonight and every night, Monday through Friday,
00:04:25your radio reporter brings you the latest worldwide news of the day.
00:04:28Oh, George, do your rehearsing someplace else.
00:04:32And a good, good evening, friends.
00:04:34This is your Hollywood super snooper,
00:04:35fresh from the fertile fields of flickers with a few fleeting flashes of famous faces.
00:04:39Mary?
00:04:43What have you got in there?
00:04:44Goldfish?
00:04:45Well, that's about the only thing that could get a bath in this house on Saturday.
00:04:50Say, there's nothing in there.
00:04:53What are you looking for?
00:04:55Hey, have you gone cuckoo?
00:05:00Oh, Edna, you startled me.
00:05:02I was taking a flight.
00:05:04A what?
00:05:06An occult flight.
00:05:08Subjecting my astral ego into the subliminal.
00:05:14I just as soon have a fellow hold my hand.
00:05:20I wouldn't expect you to understand.
00:05:22It's beyond your earthbound conception.
00:05:25You are intellectually embalmed.
00:05:30Well, I haven't had any complaints yet.
00:05:37Mary, I think I'll wear this little crape dress of yours tonight.
00:05:41Well, you've got another thing coming.
00:05:43I'll lend you nothing after what you did to my sport coat.
00:05:45Oh, well, keep your old dress.
00:05:47And I hope you break your fishbowl.
00:05:53Good evening, neighbors.
00:05:54It's the town radio crier bringing a few drippings from the old town pump.
00:05:57George, will you get out of there?
00:05:59Go away, you insect.
00:06:02I'm going to tell Ma you call me that, you paw palate.
00:06:05Ma! Ma!
00:06:08Guys, you think I'm a baby asking to wear long drawers?
00:06:11Ma!
00:06:12You want the fellas to think I'm a buttercup?
00:06:14Shut up, Willie.
00:06:15Don't call me Willie.
00:06:16Ma, George is still in the bathroom.
00:06:18Yeah, why don't you make George change his?
00:06:20Gosh, I'm old enough to...
00:06:22Ma, if I don't get in the bathroom, I'll never be ready.
00:06:26Hey, Pop, did you have to wear long drawers when you were 17?
00:06:30Will you please make George get out of the bathroom?
00:06:32Good gosh, wait a minute, children.
00:06:34Can't a man come home after a hard day's work without listening to a lot of complaints?
00:06:38Papa, George is just staying in there to be mean.
00:06:41Yeah, Mom doesn't understand how a fella feels about things like that, Pop.
00:06:44Hello, Ed.
00:06:45Hello, Mother.
00:06:47What kept you so late?
00:06:49Well, a man brought in an order for some handbills,
00:06:51and I had to see that the boys got it out before I left the plant.
00:06:54Now I gotta hurry or I'll be late for lunch.
00:06:56Well, you can't get in the bathroom because George is in there.
00:06:59I gotta get in there.
00:07:00Oh, Father, we simply have to have another bathroom in this house.
00:07:03What for? Two people can't take a bath at the same time.
00:07:06I'll get you some supper.
00:07:07All right.
00:07:08Oh, Mother, I'm at the parlor to myself this evening.
00:07:11Company coming?
00:07:12Mr. Nordingham is spending the evening with me.
00:07:15I don't believe I remember your mentioning him before, Mary.
00:07:18I just met him.
00:07:20He's a scientist and very intellectual.
00:07:22Well, I'll try and get everything all tidied up before I go over to Mrs. Fletcher's.
00:07:28Good evening, ladies and gentlemen.
00:07:30This is the old Melody Man, bringing you the latest lilt of syncopation.
00:07:35If you don't stop annoying me, you lop-eared baboon, I'll...
00:07:39What?
00:07:41Gosh, Father, I didn't know that was you.
00:07:44Did you get a job today?
00:07:46I'll tell you about that.
00:07:47Did you look in the want ads?
00:07:49Well, there's nothing there, Father, suitable to my talents.
00:07:51You ought to be ashamed of yourself.
00:07:53When I was your age, I was five years working and making $22 a week.
00:07:57Oh, Father.
00:07:58What kind of a job are you looking for?
00:07:59Calling out stations on a steamship.
00:08:02Oh, Mom!
00:08:30Mr. Phillips is here, Edna.
00:08:34You take off my dress!
00:08:36Now, Mary, don't you touch me or I'll...
00:08:38Or I'll stay home all night and sit in the pot with you and your fellow.
00:08:41Well, all right, but you just wait till you get home.
00:08:53Hi, Cupid.
00:08:54Hello, Willie.
00:08:55Hey, you call me that again, I'll bust you right on the schnozzle.
00:08:58Hello, Al.
00:08:59Hello, peaches.
00:09:01Peaches? Lemons.
00:09:03Where are we going?
00:09:04I got my dad's car and I thought maybe we'd go for a little ride and then take in a picture.
00:09:08Great, wait till I get my clothes on.
00:09:10You're not going.
00:09:11Oh, yeah? What do you want me to do, sit home all night?
00:09:14Not when Al's buying tickets to his show.
00:09:16That right, Al?
00:09:17Well, I guess it's all right by me, Willie.
00:09:21Didn't I tell you not to call...
00:09:24Yeah, sure, Al, old boy.
00:09:26I don't see why you can't go out by yourself.
00:09:28What would, 15 cents?
00:09:30Willie, you go right upstairs and get dressed.
00:09:33Oh, it's only Al, Mom.
00:09:35Oh, Al, meet my mother. Mom, this is Al Phillips.
00:09:38Pleased to meet you, Mrs. Wallace.
00:09:39How do you do, Al?
00:09:40Where are you and Edna going?
00:09:42Oh, we're going to a show.
00:09:43Oh, well, that'll be all right, but I don't want you riding around the highways.
00:09:48There are too many bad accidents at night.
00:09:50Oh, Al's a wonderful driver, Ma.
00:09:52He knows all about cars.
00:09:54He's an inventor.
00:09:55He's a what?
00:09:57He's a soda jerker at the Pink Pig.
00:10:00Well, that's only my spare time work, and Benning's my real trade.
00:10:04Willie's going with us, Ma, so everything will be all right.
00:10:07Sure, we wouldn't think of going anyplace without good old Bill.
00:10:11Well, go put your clothes on, then. You can't go out like that.
00:10:14Okay, but don't you two try and run out on me,
00:10:17because if you do, I'll tell something I know about one time when I was...
00:10:20Oh, gee, I'm sorry, Pop.
00:10:22Willie, can't you see where you're going?
00:10:25Ted, what happened?
00:10:27Nothing, I was just resting.
00:10:29Here, see if you can blame things faster than Willie, Mother.
00:10:33You've got to come out now and have something to eat.
00:10:35I haven't time. I'll be late for Lodge.
00:10:38Well, Lodge or no Lodge, you've got to have your supper.
00:10:40But this is the Wales, the new Lodge. It's important.
00:10:44I'm the door tender.
00:10:46That sounds important.
00:10:48Though it's kind of funny they don't let you into the meetings with the others.
00:10:52Well, a new member. Give me time.
00:10:55Well, even a doorkeeper's got to eat.
00:10:58Oh, I want to eat.
00:11:11Ladies and gentlemen, this program has come to you through the courtesy of the Barney Spinach Wafer Company.
00:11:16Hey, George, have a heart.
00:11:18Be sure to serve your little ones.
00:11:20Be sure to serve your little ones nothing but the genuine, unadulterated, delicious...
00:11:24Bologna.
00:11:25Bologna.
00:11:26No, you nitwit.
00:11:27Thanks.
00:11:28Listen, George, you're going cuckoo doing all this radio rooster stuff.
00:11:32And besides, you're going to get dandruff on your tonsils using that hairbrush for a microphone.
00:11:37That's too much.
00:11:38I won't take that, even from a brother.
00:11:40All right, now, George, can't you take a joke?
00:11:42No, I can't.
00:11:43Hey, look, your radio's falling over.
00:11:45You big scamp.
00:11:46Willie!
00:11:47Have a good time, but come home early.
00:11:49I will.
00:11:50Good night.
00:11:52If you start anything, I'll tell on you, because I didn't even touch you.
00:11:56Hey, Mom.
00:11:57What is it now, Willie?
00:11:58Oh, nothing.
00:12:01Where's Edna now?
00:12:02I guess they're waiting for you outside.
00:12:04Outside?
00:12:06Goodbye.
00:12:10Hey!
00:12:11Hey!
00:12:14All right, you couple of cheapskates.
00:12:16I'll get even with you for that.
00:12:19Goodbye.
00:12:29I'll answer it, Mother.
00:12:30It's probably Mr. Nordingham.
00:12:36Yeah, and a company lady.
00:12:38Two dollars.
00:12:39It was due three days ago, and I've got to get it this time.
00:12:41I beg your pardon.
00:12:43I said...
00:12:44I heard you.
00:12:45Please remember your position.
00:12:47I shall obtain the paltry sum for my father.
00:12:50Wait.
00:12:56Yes, sirree, Mother.
00:12:57This is going to be a big night at the Whales.
00:12:59The Grand Harpoon is coming on from Chicago.
00:13:02Oh, that reminds me, Ed.
00:13:04Father's coming on from Kansas City for a visit.
00:13:06Well, I guess that'll be all right with me, too.
00:13:09Mother, the piano man is here for his money.
00:13:12Oh, Ed, your pay envelope.
00:13:14Oh, gosh.
00:13:15I nearly forgot it.
00:13:16You give it to him, will you, Mary?
00:13:18I've got to help your father get started.
00:13:20Yeah, and I've got to get going.
00:13:24Ed.
00:13:25This is two dollars short.
00:13:27It is?
00:13:28Uh-huh.
00:13:29It must have been taken out for some reason.
00:13:31I'll think of it later.
00:13:32I've got to hurry now.
00:13:42I beg your pardon.
00:13:43Is this the Wallace residence?
00:13:44Yeah.
00:13:51I'm Mr. Nottingham.
00:13:53It's all right with me.
00:13:55And I suppose you're little Willie?
00:13:57Listen, Mug, one more crack like that and I'll pop your eye in the chin.
00:14:01Willie!
00:14:02Good evening, Miss Mary.
00:14:03Oh, good evening, Mr. Nottingham.
00:14:04Won't you come in?
00:14:09How dare you speak like that to Mr. Nottingham?
00:14:11Well, no buttercup like him can cutie me and go to war.
00:14:14You little ruffian!
00:14:20It's so delightful of you to ask me here.
00:14:22Shall we go into the drawing room?
00:14:26How do I look?
00:14:27Well, Ed Wallace, you're just about the best looking man in town when you get one of your uniforms on.
00:14:35Well, it does give something to a man.
00:14:37Yes, it does.
00:14:38Where's my large hat?
00:14:39Right here.
00:14:42Oh, mother, the feather goes in the back.
00:14:48Well, it looks just as good in the front as it does in the back, if you ask me.
00:14:51I'm sorry I won't be able to drive you over to Mrs. Fletcher's.
00:14:54Oh, don't you worry about that.
00:14:56I won't be gone long.
00:14:58I want to be here when Grandpa comes.
00:15:01You have such a sweet little home.
00:15:03And so spiritually harmonious.
00:15:05Oh, do you think so?
00:15:06Oh, yes, and my psychic sense responds to the vibration of blue.
00:15:09It does?
00:15:10Yes, and that signifies a sympathetic surrounding.
00:15:12Peaceful, ineffable serenity and refinement.
00:15:14Mother, how will he bring in the garbage can?
00:15:20What do you want for Sunday dinner?
00:15:21Anything's all right with me.
00:15:24Ed?
00:15:35Larry, do you think that three pounds of corned beef will...
00:15:38Oh, excuse me.
00:15:40Mother dear, I want you to meet Mr. Nordingham.
00:15:43How do you do?
00:15:44How do you do?
00:15:45I'm honored.
00:15:46Your lovely daughter has told me so much about you.
00:15:49Please don't move.
00:15:51I can sense it.
00:15:53Oh, it's beautiful.
00:15:56I glimpsed it.
00:15:57I glimpsed it briefly.
00:15:59You glimpsed it? Why?
00:16:01Your aura.
00:16:02You have the most beautiful pink aura, Mrs. Wallace.
00:16:08Mary, may I speak to you for a minute?
00:16:17What was he talking about?
00:16:19Mother, he'll hear you.
00:16:21He complimented you when he said you had a pink aura.
00:16:24Mine's only gray.
00:16:26What are you talking about?
00:16:28Your aura.
00:16:30It's something that hangs about.
00:16:32Something you don't see when it's there.
00:16:34Mary, if you're trying to tell me my petticoat show, say so right out.
00:16:40No, Mother.
00:16:42Your aura is the radiant spirit protoplasm that embraces you.
00:16:46What kind of crazy...
00:16:47Mother, please.
00:16:50Oh, well, I suppose you're old enough to take care of yourself.
00:16:53Anyway, I've got to go.
00:16:55You be sure and look out for Grandpa when he comes.
00:17:04Sperm! Oil!
00:17:06Alas!
00:17:07Alas!
00:17:08All good whales prosper.
00:17:11Another barrel of whale oil.
00:17:15Sperm! Oil!
00:17:17Alas!
00:17:18Alas!
00:17:19All good whales prosper.
00:17:21Ed, I want you to meet Mr. Franklin Q. Whitney,
00:17:24our national Grand Harpoon from Chicago.
00:17:28This is Ed Wallace, Grand Harpoon.
00:17:30He's a good fella.
00:17:31This is Ed Wallace, Grand Harpoon.
00:17:33He's a good fella.
00:17:34We're breaking him into the lodge.
00:17:36A friend of Joe Dorgan's is a friend of mine.
00:17:39I'm pleased to meet you, Grand Harpoon.
00:17:42You'll excuse me, Brother Wallace.
00:17:43I'd like a confidential word with Joe.
00:17:46Sure.
00:17:49I've got great news for you.
00:17:51The President wires me.
00:17:52He's going to let you have another $5,000 worth of stock.
00:17:55Gosh, Grand Harpoon.
00:17:57Sure wish I could take it.
00:17:59But you see, I had to give a note to the bank
00:18:01for the first $5,000 I bought.
00:18:04That's most unfortunate.
00:18:06How about your friend Wallace here?
00:18:08He looks like a live wire.
00:18:09Oh, Ed's a good man.
00:18:12Two more barrels of whale oil.
00:18:17Brother Wallace,
00:18:19your friend Dorgan has recommended you very highly.
00:18:21Now, I have a little proposition I'm letting some of the boys in on.
00:18:24Well, that's very thoughtful of you, Grand Harpoon.
00:18:27Don't mention it.
00:18:28How would you like to invest in a valuable gold mine?
00:18:31Well, I don't know.
00:18:32That's kind of out of my line.
00:18:34Is Joe in on it?
00:18:36You bet I am.
00:18:37It's a sure thing.
00:18:39We'll take it up after the meeting.
00:18:43Two more barrels of whale oil.
00:19:22Do you see anything, Mr. Nottingham?
00:19:24Something is forming.
00:19:26We must be very quiet.
00:19:28We must wait for the proper vibrations.
00:19:34Oh, this is Mr. Nottingham.
00:19:36How do you do, sir?
00:19:37Fetty's young father.
00:19:38Oh, Grandfather.
00:19:40Mr. Nottingham is a famous occultist.
00:19:42Oh, I wonder if you'd mind looking over these specks.
00:19:45Not an oculus, Grandfather.
00:19:47Just a seer of divine things.
00:19:50Oh, excuse me, my mistake.
00:19:53Where's your ma?
00:19:54She and Willie have gone out, but George is home.
00:19:56Is your pa home from work yet?
00:19:58No, he's gone to the lodge, but George is home.
00:20:01Yes, so you said.
00:20:03Oh, sure.
00:20:04I'll get out of your way.
00:20:06Let me show you, Grandfather.
00:20:07Oh, I know where George's room is.
00:20:09Well, good night, young fella.
00:20:11Good night.
00:20:18I'm sure you understand.
00:20:19He's a fine old man.
00:20:21A rugged soul.
00:20:22Yes, of course.
00:20:23Now, won't you see if there's something more about me in the crystal?
00:20:28Grandfather, you're a sight for sore eyes.
00:20:30Glad to see you too, Georgie.
00:20:32How's doctrine business coming along?
00:20:33Well, I gave that up a year or so ago.
00:20:35Too many doctors.
00:20:36I took up architecture.
00:20:37There's a lot of money in that.
00:20:39Well, yes and no.
00:20:40I found the field uncomfortably overcrowded, so I tried landscape gardening for a time.
00:20:44You quit that too?
00:20:45Had to.
00:20:46Poison ivy from my head to my heels.
00:20:49Well, you'll strike something sometime, I expect.
00:20:51Well, I'm not discouraged.
00:20:52I study, constantly improving my mind.
00:20:55That ought to help.
00:20:56Got a place for me to sleep tonight?
00:20:58Oh, sure.
00:20:59There's plenty of room.
00:21:00You can sleep in Willie's bed.
00:21:01Oh, that's fine.
00:21:02Georgie, I got a secret.
00:21:04I come this time to stay.
00:21:06Huh?
00:21:07Sold out the old place for the taxes, and here I am.
00:21:10Say, you know, Grandfather, I think you'd be more comfortable in my bed.
00:21:13I'll sleep downstairs on the couch.
00:21:15Anything's good enough for me.
00:21:22Something is forming.
00:21:24It's you.
00:21:26I see you stepping out of a luxurious automobile.
00:21:29Go on.
00:21:30Go on.
00:21:31All I can say is your family will become wealthy through an investment.
00:21:34But we haven't any money for a real investment.
00:21:37Might be for only a few thousand dollars.
00:21:39Maybe it's oil.
00:21:41I'm sure it'll come out of the ground.
00:21:48Well, that was a nighting.
00:21:49We always have good meetings.
00:21:51I think you'll drop this, Grand Harpoon.
00:21:53Oh, thanks, Wallace.
00:21:55Now, let me see.
00:21:56It seems that I'm forgetting something.
00:21:57Now, what could it be?
00:21:58Was it that business you were going to take up with me?
00:22:01So it was.
00:22:03But this is no place to talk business.
00:22:05And we'd better go over to my hotel.
00:22:07Well, the family will be expecting me home.
00:22:10I wonder if I couldn't drive you out to my house.
00:22:12Perhaps that would be better.
00:22:15Miss Grandfather, I've devoted my talents to radio.
00:22:19It's the voice of the people, the ears of the nation.
00:22:22It reaches to the farthest corners of the earth.
00:22:25I'm a harp of a thousand strings.
00:22:30I'm a harp of a thousand strings.
00:22:35I'm a harp of a thousand strings.
00:22:38I'm a harp of a thousand strings.
00:22:40Oh, no, no, Miss Mary.
00:22:42You must attune yourself with abandon, like this.
00:22:46I'm a harp of a thousand strings.
00:22:49I'm a harp of a thousand strings.
00:22:53I'm a harp of a thousand strings.
00:22:57I'm a harp of a thousand strings.
00:23:01I'm a harp of a thousand strings.
00:23:04Great heavens, what new form of idiocy is that?
00:23:07It's that fortune teller fellow your sister Mary's got in the parlor.
00:23:10You know, there are times, Grandfather,
00:23:12when I think this family suffers from a strain of incipient insanity.
00:23:15Well, you ain't got the face to deny it, Georgie.
00:23:21You see, Miss Mary, you're like a beautiful harp.
00:23:24Each string of which is in tune with the universe.
00:23:28Oh, Mr. Nottingham is so beautiful.
00:23:31I can almost hear the stillness of the great empty spaces.
00:23:35Come right in, Grand Harpoon.
00:23:39Oh, dear.
00:23:41Father will bring people home with him.
00:23:43Make yourself at home.
00:23:45Not the swellest house in town, but it's all mine. I own it.
00:23:48That's what I've always said, Wallace.
00:23:50It's the home that makes a substantial citizen.
00:23:53Step into the parlor.
00:23:57Sperm.
00:23:58Oil.
00:23:59Alaska.
00:24:01Sperm.
00:24:02Oil.
00:24:03Alaska.
00:24:04Why, we're all brothers.
00:24:06Father, this is Mr. Nottingham.
00:24:08The exalted blubber of the Detroit line.
00:24:10Pleased to meet you.
00:24:11And this is my daughter Mary, Mr. Whitney.
00:24:13How do you do?
00:24:14Nottingham, how's it come you haven't been around to the meetings
00:24:16to get acquainted with the boy?
00:24:17I intend to in the first.
00:24:19You gentlemen care of talking private?
00:24:21Not at all necessary.
00:24:22Mr. Nottingham is one of our inner circle.
00:24:24And Mary is one of the family, so you can go right ahead, Grand Harpoon.
00:24:27Well, as I was explaining to you driving out in the car,
00:24:30certain high executives of the Whales
00:24:32are floating a stock issue of supernoxial gold.
00:24:35A new issue, Mr. Whitney?
00:24:36No, Nottingham.
00:24:37There are 500 shares unsubscribed,
00:24:38which we have decided to let go to a select group of large brothers.
00:24:41Well, I'll take them gladly.
00:24:42I'll give you a check right now.
00:24:43Now, just a minute.
00:24:44You already have your block.
00:24:45Block all that one member is allowed.
00:24:47Well, I was given to understand there was no more to be had.
00:24:50Really, I...
00:24:51Mr. Nottingham, you surprise me.
00:24:53You're not acting in the proper brotherly spirit of a whale.
00:24:56Are you envious of Brother Wallace here
00:24:58getting his share of this splendid proposition?
00:25:00Well, to put it like that...
00:25:02Forgive me, Brother Wallace.
00:25:04Sure.
00:25:05Go ahead, Grand Harpoon.
00:25:06Well, as I was saying, this is a chance of a lifetime.
00:25:13Take these things to the kitchen, Willie.
00:25:15I guess Joe Dorgan and your father are in the parlor.
00:25:18All right, Mom.
00:25:21A fortune within reach of your hand.
00:25:23An investment that will repay you a thousandfold.
00:25:26Wealth from the earth.
00:25:28Gold, Brother Wallace.
00:25:30Oh, Mother.
00:25:31I want you to meet the Grand Harpoon of the whales, Mr. Whitney.
00:25:34Mrs. Wallace, this is an honor and a pleasure.
00:25:37I've been telling your husband...
00:25:39Yes, I heard you.
00:25:40But Ed isn't in the position to buy anything right now.
00:25:43Oh, my dear lady, you misunderstand me.
00:25:46I'm merely offering your husband an opportunity
00:25:48to get in on a sound investment
00:25:50because he's a loyal whale
00:25:52and a friend of Brother Dorgan.
00:25:54Well, Brother Dorgan got a friend
00:25:56to let him invest in a gasoline saver
00:25:58just a year ago.
00:26:00Mother, please.
00:26:02Mr. Whitney is offering Father the chance of a lifetime.
00:26:06Mom!
00:26:07Mom!
00:26:08Grandpa's here. He's out in the kitchen.
00:26:09Oh, you'll have to excuse me, gentlemen.
00:26:11My father's just come from Kansas City.
00:26:13I...
00:26:14I want to see you, Ed.
00:26:17Yes, Mother, in just a minute.
00:26:19A very fine woman, Wallace.
00:26:21You'll be guided by your wife,
00:26:23and I can see that you'll never go wrong.
00:26:27Yes, Ed?
00:26:28Nothing like knowing what you want to do, Georgie,
00:26:30and then sticking to it.
00:26:33Father!
00:26:34Mom!
00:26:35Oh!
00:26:39Fat and sassy as you were when you was 14.
00:26:42How are you?
00:26:43When did you get here?
00:26:44Well, take those packages off the table.
00:26:46Have you had your dinner?
00:26:47Oh, I paid half a dollar for it in a steam car.
00:26:49Don't you go bother him.
00:26:50I'm making a pot of coffee, Mother.
00:26:52Well, not for me.
00:26:53I ain't been able to stand liquor or coffee
00:26:55since my stomach gave out.
00:26:56Oh, that comes from eating in restaurants.
00:26:58Are you doing anything for us?
00:26:59Oh, we got a good old-fashioned remedy here.
00:27:01Oh, that's nice.
00:27:02What is it, Grandpa?
00:27:03Something that's good for what ails you.
00:27:09I know a guy that worked on a ship.
00:27:11He said they used to drink shellac.
00:27:13Ain't bad.
00:27:15What did you say, Willie?
00:27:17How's business, Father?
00:27:18I sold out and I'm settling down.
00:27:20Oh, I want to hear all about it.
00:27:23I won't urge you, Wallace,
00:27:25but we're closing the deal Monday morning.
00:27:27For $5,000, I'll reserve you 100 shares.
00:27:31$5,000?
00:27:33Now, I don't want to appear selfish, Brother Wallace,
00:27:35but if you feel you can't handle it,
00:27:37I've got to take it off of your hands
00:27:38and add it to my holdings.
00:27:39I don't want to miss a grand harpoon,
00:27:41but I'd like to talk it over with Mother.
00:27:43I'd like to talk it over with Mother.
00:27:45If you could give me until about,
00:27:47say, next Wednesday.
00:27:49Wednesday?
00:27:50Well, you see, Mr. Whitney,
00:27:51Father has other interests.
00:27:53Tomorrow is Sunday and the banks are closed.
00:27:55Well, it might be arranged,
00:27:57but mind you, I can't promise.
00:27:59I'm sure you could use your influence, Mr. Whitney.
00:28:02Won't you and Mr. Nottingham have dinner with us
00:28:04on Wednesday evening?
00:28:06I know Father will have arranged with the bank
00:28:08by that time.
00:28:09I find it hard to resist your plea, Miss Wallace.
00:28:12I'll do it.
00:28:13Wednesday night, Wallace.
00:28:14Thank you, grand harpoon.
00:28:16Now, I must say good night.
00:28:17I'll drive you downtown.
00:28:19Glad to take you too.
00:28:20Splendid.
00:28:22Do you remember what you saw on the crystal?
00:28:24Wealth.
00:28:25It come from the ground.
00:28:27You're absolutely right.
00:28:28I thought it might be oil, but it's gold.
00:28:30I can get two thousand,
00:28:32but I'll have to dig for the other three.
00:28:34Well, it's a nice place you have here, Wallace.
00:28:37You mean raise the money by putting...
00:28:39I mortgaged everything I own, and look at me now.
00:28:42Well, we must be going.
00:28:44Good night, Miss Mary.
00:28:45It's been such a pleasure.
00:28:46Good night.
00:28:51Tell your mother I'll be...
00:28:58A fellow from the lodge sells him something.
00:28:59Mother, Father's driving Mr. Whitney
00:29:01and Mr. Nottingham downtown.
00:29:03I've invited them here for dinner on Wednesday evening.
00:29:07I'll help you plan it.
00:29:08Ain't you gonna help cook it?
00:29:10Grandfather, we're glad to have you here,
00:29:13but right now we'd like to confer on Father's investment.
00:29:16Mary, did your father sign any papers about that gold mine?
00:29:20Gold mine?
00:29:21Mr. Whitney and Mr. Nottingham are big financiers.
00:29:24They're helping Father to make a fortune.
00:29:26Mighty nice of them.
00:29:27Come all the way out to the house to do it too.
00:29:30No one asked your opinion.
00:29:32Mary.
00:29:33She's right.
00:29:34It's kind of over my head.
00:29:35All I've been doing is putting around the junk business
00:29:38for the past 20 years.
00:29:40Keep a difference.
00:29:41So I'll leave you to the family conference.
00:29:44Oh, dear.
00:29:45I do hope your father don't sign any papers.
00:29:48Maybe he's got a good thing this time, Mother.
00:29:50You know, Mr. Whitney's an official in the Whales,
00:29:52and those lodge people are thicker than thieves.
00:29:55That's what I'm afraid of.
00:29:57Hello, everybody.
00:29:58Hi, sis.
00:29:59Hello, Edna.
00:30:00Did you have a good time?
00:30:01Oh, swell.
00:30:02Yeah, you and that cream puff ran out on me.
00:30:04You know why, Mom?
00:30:05So they could drive out on the road somewhere next.
00:30:08We did not, Mom.
00:30:09Willie's just making that up.
00:30:10Now keep quiet, both of you.
00:30:11Willie, you go on to bed.
00:30:13All right.
00:30:14But just you wait.
00:30:15I think I shall retire also.
00:30:17Good night, all.
00:30:18Good night, George.
00:30:19Oh, Edna, you may keep that little gown you're wearing.
00:30:23I shall be getting plenty more soon.
00:30:25Good night.
00:30:26Good night, Mary.
00:30:28What happened to her?
00:30:30What's the matter, Mom?
00:30:32Nothing, dear.
00:30:34Don't you believe what Willie said?
00:30:36I didn't do anything wrong.
00:30:38Of course you didn't.
00:30:39You know I trust you.
00:30:41Coming to bed?
00:30:43Not yet.
00:30:44I'm waiting for your father.
00:30:46Good night.
00:30:47Good night, baby.
00:30:59Good night.
00:31:29Good night.
00:31:30Good night.
00:31:59You shouldn't have waited up, Mother.
00:32:17I was worried, Ed.
00:32:18What about?
00:32:19The kids all right?
00:32:20Oh, yes.
00:32:21You didn't sign any papers about that goldmine business, did you?
00:32:25No, no, Mother.
00:32:26But it's a great thing if I could raise the money to get in on it.
00:32:29Don't talk like that.
00:32:30You frighten me.
00:32:31You know all we've saved up is our building and loan shares, and that's only $1,800.
00:32:36That's what's bothering me.
00:32:37I need $5,000.
00:32:39Have you gone crazy, Ed?
00:32:41Let me tell you about it, Mother.
00:32:42I don't want to hear about it.
00:32:44I just want you to promise me you won't have anything to do with it.
00:32:46But, Mother.
00:32:47We're not the kind of people to afford such things.
00:32:50We've got the children to think of.
00:32:52Well, Edna hasn't finished school yet.
00:32:54George has got to get started.
00:32:56Mary's going to want a nice wedding someday.
00:32:58But that's what I'm thinking of, Mother.
00:33:00You and the kids.
00:33:01Just what the Lord gave us, and be thankful.
00:33:04You've been the best husband and father any woman ever had.
00:33:08I know you want to do for me and the children.
00:33:11I don't want to hurt you, Ed.
00:33:13But I've got to give these fellows an answer by Wednesday night.
00:33:16Well, tell them we're just plain people.
00:33:18We'll give them a good dinner and just forget all about the goldmine.
00:33:25Here's your dish towel, Molly.
00:33:27Oh, that's the second time I've done that this morning.
00:33:30I guess it must be a sign of something.
00:33:32Sure, it's a sign you get your mind on something else.
00:33:34What's worrying you?
00:33:36Well, I suppose I might as well tell you.
00:33:38Ed wants to put all our savings in a goldmine.
00:33:41Better than chasing around with other women.
00:33:43Oh, well, Ed wouldn't do a thing like that.
00:33:45He's a good man.
00:33:46He's a good man.
00:33:47He's a good man.
00:33:48He's a good man.
00:33:49He's a good man.
00:33:50He's a good man.
00:33:51Better than chasing around with other women.
00:33:52Oh, well, Ed wouldn't do a thing like that.
00:33:54But it'd just worry me sick to lose what we've saved.
00:33:57I guess we all get a hankering to make a lot of money quick and easy.
00:34:00Yes, I guess we do.
00:34:02It'd be so grand for the children.
00:34:04I'd like them to have the best of everything in life.
00:34:07Everything that's fine.
00:34:08On the other hand, Molly, if they had everything they set their minds on, it might ruin them.
00:34:13Not my children.
00:34:15Well, of course, I know they're contrary sometimes.
00:34:18But they're a good, loyal family.
00:34:20Yes, and you're a good, loyal mother.
00:34:22But if you had a lot of money, it might be different.
00:34:24Oh, no, it wouldn't.
00:34:25I guess every mother in the world's like that.
00:34:27She wants to do all she can for her family.
00:34:30That's what worries me so, to think of losing what we've got.
00:34:33Well, stop your worrying.
00:34:34I'll drop down to the hotel and see this goldmine fellow.
00:34:37Now, maybe he's all right.
00:34:39Don't you get mixed up in this, Father.
00:34:41Oh, don't worry.
00:34:43I know my way around.
00:34:48Now, listen to me, Whitney.
00:34:49Let's be satisfied and blow this town now.
00:34:52Don't be silly.
00:34:53The picking's just getting good.
00:34:55Oh, I know they're saps, all right.
00:34:57But even a whale's going to turn.
00:34:59And if they get wise to us, we'll wind up in a stripe of pajamas.
00:35:02Oh, forget it.
00:35:04What about Wallace, baby?
00:35:05He hasn't got a thing.
00:35:07I pumped a dollar for her, she's blue in the face.
00:35:09And 5,000 bucks to them is a federal debt.
00:35:12My dear boy, you don't know human nature.
00:35:15Wallace will come through if he has to rob his grandmother.
00:35:18Grandmother, my eye.
00:35:20It's Grandpa.
00:35:21And he's no dumbbell.
00:35:23All the better.
00:35:24We'll take Grandpa, too.
00:35:37Well, well, come in, sir.
00:35:39Come in.
00:35:40Howdy.
00:35:41How are you?
00:35:42Meet Mr. Whitney.
00:35:43My dear sir, have a chair.
00:35:45Thanks.
00:35:47Are you the fellow that's talking gold mines to my son-in-law?
00:35:50Well, merely as a representative of the whale.
00:35:52You understand, Mr...
00:35:54Hopkins, Tom Hopkins.
00:35:55Oh, yes.
00:35:56Mr. Hopkins, you understand this mining proposition is only open to...
00:35:59Oh, no, that's too bad.
00:36:01I was getting sort of interested.
00:36:03Did a little prospect myself in California when I was young, but...
00:36:06If it's one of them closed corporations...
00:36:08Well, not entirely.
00:36:10Perhaps we could initiate you into the order.
00:36:13The whale...
00:36:14is a grand harpoon.
00:36:15It might be arranged.
00:36:17No, no, no.
00:36:18I'll pass.
00:36:19I don't think I could go for one of them hats.
00:36:22Let me explain this proposition more clearly.
00:36:24Oh, I don't want to bother you.
00:36:26I'll just get a little money saved up,
00:36:27sold out my business in Kansas City
00:36:29for something I might turn a penny at.
00:36:31Nordingham, let's show the gentleman the big map.
00:36:34By all means.
00:36:45The family hearth.
00:36:47Happy faces on the festive board.
00:36:50Yes, you're a lucky man, Wallace.
00:36:52You deserve all the good fortune that's coming to you.
00:36:55A toast to Mr. Wallace.
00:36:56Ed, be careful.
00:36:58You've had three glasses of that wine,
00:37:00and you know what it does to your head.
00:37:02Yeah, I remember last time I was visiting you,
00:37:04I had just got initiated into the kangaroos or something
00:37:07and couldn't go to work for two days.
00:37:10Wouldn't you gentlemen like to go into the drawing room
00:37:12for your cigars?
00:37:13That's a good idea.
00:37:14Now give me a chance to clear off the table.
00:37:16Edna, you go get the tray from the kitchen.
00:37:18You going up to bed, Bobby?
00:37:19No, can't sleep much in that room with Willie anyhow.
00:37:22Molly, you ought to do something up that boy's nose.
00:37:25He snores something terrible.
00:37:27Me snore?
00:37:28Gee whiz, he keep the night watchman awake.
00:37:31Ma, I'm going out tonight.
00:37:32I have a date with Al.
00:37:33Yeah, me too.
00:37:34And tonight, you two don't give me the air.
00:37:36I'll go chase yourself, Willie.
00:37:38And don't call me Willie.
00:37:39Children, children.
00:37:42Well, Brother Wallace, don't you think it advisable
00:37:44to take up our little business matter now?
00:37:46Might just as well.
00:37:48Here is a certified check for $5,000.
00:37:51Took every penny I could scrape up.
00:37:53And you'll never regret it.
00:37:55Fortune is rapping at your door.
00:37:57We're expecting good news from the mine at any time now.
00:38:00Let's get along.
00:38:01Yes, let's get going.
00:38:02I'll be back in a minute.
00:38:04Yes, let's get going.
00:38:05I'll be with you in just a minute.
00:38:07I want to see Mother first.
00:38:08Now, where did I leave my pipe?
00:38:14Oh, Mother.
00:38:15What is it?
00:38:16Here.
00:38:17Put these away and take good care of them.
00:38:20Ed Wallace, you bought that stock?
00:38:24Mother, it's all right.
00:38:26Where did you get the money?
00:38:27I'll tell you when I get back.
00:38:30Sorry to rush off this way.
00:38:32Thanks for a very lovely dinner.
00:38:34Oh, it's been so nice to have you.
00:38:36Ready, folks?
00:38:37All ready.
00:38:38Good night.
00:38:39Good night.
00:38:40Good night.
00:38:42Ed, wait.
00:38:43Now, don't you worry, Mother.
00:38:48I love that you've spent an evening in cultural society.
00:38:52Father, where did you get the money for that stock?
00:38:56Do you know?
00:38:57That's something you'll have to ask Ed.
00:38:59Oh, why be upset about it, Mother?
00:39:02Mr. Nordingham is in on the mine, so it must be all right.
00:39:05Yes, and both he and Mr. Whitney are whales, Mother.
00:39:08Father's a whale, too.
00:39:09Oh, Ed.
00:39:10Give him a pair of striped pants and a cup-hat and he'll join anything.
00:39:14Grandfather, we'd appreciate it if you'd resist making senile observations.
00:39:19Senile?
00:39:21What's that?
00:39:22Childish, Grandfather.
00:39:24Childish?
00:39:25Childish?
00:39:26Well, I ain't so childish I go flitting around like a ninny, pretending to be a heart.
00:39:31Must I be insulted in my own home?
00:39:34Your home, it's her home.
00:39:35I gave it to her when she was married.
00:39:37I am going to my room.
00:39:39Mary, you beg your grandfather's pardon right away.
00:39:42Never.
00:39:43Scared?
00:39:44Oh, now, Grandfather, he's...
00:39:45Can I go for you, too?
00:39:46Doing nothing but going around all day telling yourself bedtime stories
00:39:49instead of working to support yourself.
00:39:52Well, Grandfather...
00:39:53Get out of here before I lose my temper and you hear some real broadcasting.
00:39:57Father, they didn't mean to hurt your feelings.
00:39:59I know they didn't.
00:40:01Don't mind me.
00:40:03That was just a little play acting.
00:40:07Seems like it's about time for someone to distribute a little horse sense around here
00:40:11the way things are going on.
00:40:12What with grand harpoons and gold mines.
00:40:16Oh, I wish I knew where Ed got the money to buy that stock.
00:40:20You stop worrying and get your dishes done.
00:40:23That'll give me something to think about till he gets home.
00:40:44I'm here, Ed.
00:40:51Hello, Mother.
00:40:53Sit down. I want to talk to you.
00:40:59Where'd you get the money to buy that stock?
00:41:02I, uh...
00:41:04Well, Mother, I mortgaged the house.
00:41:07Now, that's a story.
00:41:09You couldn't have done that unless I signed the papers.
00:41:12I, uh... I had your power of attorney.
00:41:15Remember the time you were laid up?
00:41:17Shucks, Mother, don't feel that way about it.
00:41:20We'll have plenty of money from now on.
00:41:22I don't want to hear any more about it.
00:41:24But this gold mine is going to be a big thing.
00:41:27I just want you to leave me alone.
00:41:30Shh.
00:41:34Gee, Grandpa, I'm glad you're here.
00:41:36I wish you'd go in the parlor and speak to Molly.
00:41:39She's all upset.
00:41:41Ah, probably something she ate for dinner.
00:41:43No, no.
00:41:45She's probably gone to bed.
00:41:47I'll go get her.
00:41:51You go ahead and get ready.
00:41:53her and speak to Molly. She's all upset.
00:41:56Ah, probably something she ate for dinner.
00:41:59No, no. No, that is...
00:42:02Well, I just told her that I mortgaged the house for that gold mine stock.
00:42:05You mort... Oh...
00:42:08Well, maybe I better talk with her before she thinks it over
00:42:11and decides to scalp you.
00:42:14Leave it to me.
00:42:24Well, Ed told me.
00:42:27Now, quit acting like a baby.
00:42:30Why, if your ma had to tend to him every time I mortgaged the house,
00:42:33she'd have gone daft.
00:42:36Owning our own home gave me such a feeling of security.
00:42:39Something to cling to.
00:42:42Well, anyway, Molly, you've got children.
00:42:45Stayed bitchin' and helpin' you got in a tight place.
00:42:48Yes, I suppose George could go to work and Mary could teach piano.
00:42:52Every young girl gets a fool idea once in a while.
00:42:55They're all good children, Molly.
00:42:58If they weren't, they wouldn't be yours.
00:43:01Mine and Ed's.
00:43:04Well, I guess it's all my fault.
00:43:07I didn't have no business lettin' you marry a...
00:43:10There isn't a better husband or father in the world than Ed Wallace.
00:43:13Then go and tell him, Cheryl, why the poor fella's probably kickin' his pants
00:43:16all around the room with his time.
00:43:20Father, you're an old fraud.
00:43:23Now you know how I hate a woman a lollygaggin' over me.
00:43:31Hello? Yes?
00:43:34This is me.
00:43:37What? You don't mean it?
00:43:40Gosh! I said gosh!
00:43:43Mother, grandfather, everyone!
00:43:47Wait till the others get here.
00:43:50Children, come downstairs! Everybody!
00:43:53I wonder what it is. What does he want?
00:43:56Well, let's find out.
00:44:03Listen, folks, we're rich. We're rich.
00:44:06Are you sure you're not having a nervous breakdown?
00:44:09The grand harpoon just got a wire from the mine.
00:44:12They struck the lost one-eyed skunk load.
00:44:15I'm gonna get a new car.
00:44:18Oh, I knew it! The crystal said so.
00:44:21We'll move out of this house in the morning.
00:44:24I'm gonna enter a boys' school at once.
00:44:27I'm gonna get a swell new car.
00:44:39If you will allow me, madam.
00:44:45Do the children know that breakfast is ready, Perkins?
00:44:48The family have been informed that breakfast is served, madam.
00:44:53Well, I wonder what's keeping them, then.
00:44:56I'm under the impression they did not relish being disturbed.
00:44:59In fact, Master William requested me to go soak my head.
00:45:02Oh, I hope you don't mind me saying a thing like that, Perkins.
00:45:05He's always been so full of life.
00:45:08Ever since he was a little boy.
00:45:11I dare say, madam.
00:45:15Yes?
00:45:18At the door, madam.
00:45:21With your permission.
00:45:27Out of my way, Perkins. I'm in a hurry.
00:45:30Mom, I just got to have a new evening dress.
00:45:33I've been outlining everything I have, every place in town.
00:45:36I can't have Mr. Crothers thinking I'm some poor little Cinderella
00:45:39without clothes to cover my lily-white body, now can I?
00:45:42Breakfast.
00:45:45I can't eat breakfast, Ma. Just orange juice.
00:45:48Gotta keep slim and boyish, you know.
00:45:51That's the way Jerry likes him.
00:45:54What kind of new nonsense is this?
00:45:57It isn't nonsense, Mom. It's Jerry Crothers. I told you about him.
00:46:00Oh, Mom, he's wonderful. He's glorious.
00:46:03He's grand. He's marvelous. All the girls are wild about him.
00:46:06But I got him.
00:46:09He's the perfect person for you to be around with.
00:46:12He's worldly and worthless.
00:46:15Interesting, Mom.
00:46:18Flowers. For Miss Edna.
00:46:21They're from Jerry. I must phone him right away.
00:46:24Have them put in water.
00:46:27Perkins, will you see what's keeping the other children?
00:46:30Very well, madam.
00:46:40I really value your opinion very much, Perkins,
00:46:43because you have such perfect diction.
00:46:46Now listen to this.
00:46:49I'm Sol Little Kitties of Radioland.
00:46:52We come to the close of tonight's adventures with Brother Rabbit,
00:46:55the Little Chipmunk, and Goldilocks.
00:46:58Remember, we will be with you again tomorrow night at the same time.
00:47:01And now, listen to Brother Rabbit.
00:47:04Good night, Little Kitties.
00:47:07How was that, Perkins?
00:47:10Quite satisfactory, sir.
00:47:13But of course, I do not consider myself an authority on rabbits.
00:47:18Ah, Perkins, there you are, my man.
00:47:21Yes, my lady.
00:47:29Very good, my lady.
00:47:32The motor at eleven.
00:47:36Show him into the Salon des...
00:47:42Thank you, Perkins. You are very kind.
00:47:45Thank you, my lady.
00:47:51Hey, Perky.
00:47:55Let me have forty bucks, will you?
00:47:58Master, will you, my...
00:48:01I know that makes 280, but you'll get it back.
00:48:04It's just irregular, sir.
00:48:07Yes, and so are some of those grub bills you slip over on Pop.
00:48:10But I don't peep, do I?
00:48:13Mr. William, really, I must remonstrate.
00:48:16See you in the funny papers.
00:48:19Here you are. See, I wasn't trying to hold out on you.
00:48:22Why, I'd give you the moon if you asked for it.
00:48:25Now you can buy that little hat or whatever it was you wanted.
00:48:28Oh, cherie. Oh, cute little kitten.
00:48:31Don't call me Willie, please.
00:48:34No, it's your Billy, n'est-ce pas, Billy?
00:48:37Oui, oui, cherie.
00:48:40And next week you will buy me the fur coat, huh?
00:48:43Oh, gee, Celeste, I don't know.
00:48:46Oh, you do not love me?
00:48:49Oh, well, don't cry. I'll fix it up somehow.
00:48:52My Billy.
00:48:55Chief?
00:48:58Willie.
00:49:01Very idea.
00:49:04I never thought that a brother of mine would...
00:49:07Say, what is this? Can a fellow have any privacy?
00:49:10Willie, Mother wishes to speak to you in the dining room.
00:49:13Well, all right, but don't you start anything.
00:49:20You are dismissed this instant.
00:49:23Hello?
00:49:26I don't wish to hear anything from you.
00:49:29I am content, but perhaps your papa would like to know
00:49:32what happened with you and Monsieur Nottingham
00:49:35and that you have packed everything to go away tonight, huh?
00:49:38Shh!
00:49:41Of course, Celeste, I was hasty.
00:49:44We'll forget it.
00:49:47Oh, and I'm through with that little blue chiffon tea gown.
00:49:50You might like it.
00:49:53Merci, mademoiselle.
00:50:05All right, my 40 bucks.
00:50:08Come on.
00:50:11If I give you the gate, you stop walking.
00:50:14Big-hearted, Harry.
00:50:17It's awful to see anyone else cut in around here, isn't it?
00:50:20Oh, save the chatter. Come on.
00:50:23Okay, no need for you and me to fight about it.
00:50:26There's plenty for both of us in this family of fools.
00:50:35Well, I'm sure you could give up one night.
00:50:38I've tried not to interfere with your pleasures, but
00:50:41it's your grandfather's birthday, and I'd like to have you here.
00:50:44I don't wish to seem inconsiderate, but I'm sponsoring a radio revel tonight.
00:50:47I'm to be introduced over the air.
00:50:50Ladies and gentlemen, I'm warning you.
00:50:53Stay away from your radios tonight, that is all.
00:50:56Ma, I just can't give up my day tonight.
00:50:59And I have planned to leave for a weekend in Canada.
00:51:02I've already made reservations.
00:51:05Well, couldn't you just be home for dinner?
00:51:08Mother dear, isn't it just a bit absurd?
00:51:11Wouldn't it be more charitable if he were provided for
00:51:14in one of those nice, comfortable places for elderly people?
00:51:17You mean, put Grandpa in an old folks' home?
00:51:20We could give him a generous allowance.
00:51:23Don't let me ever hear one of you suggest such a thing as that again.
00:51:26Don't you realize you're talking about my father?
00:51:29Well, we're certainly reminded of it often enough.
00:51:32Doesn't it mean anything to you that when people get old,
00:51:35it's their children's duty to be kind to them?
00:51:38Pardon me. Mr. Wallace's office is on the telephone.
00:51:41I'll take it.
00:51:44Well, Mom, I'll stick around long enough to wish the old boy
00:51:47a couple of more happy birthdays.
00:51:50I suppose I can be here for a little while, too, Mom.
00:51:53I'll have some ham and eggs for him.
00:51:56Emphasis on the ham.
00:52:03Yes, Daddykins?
00:52:06Yes, Daddykins?
00:52:09No, I haven't planned on being here for dinner,
00:52:12but if Mr. Nottingham and Mr. Whitney will be here,
00:52:15of course I will. I'll arrange everything.
00:52:18What?
00:52:21Mother?
00:52:24Yes, I ain't scarcely seen you more for the past few days with being so busy and everything.
00:52:27Tell her I was asking for her. Yes.
00:52:30Goodbye.
00:52:33Well, I guess a few hand knaves won't worry me none
00:52:36with the splitting headache I've got. Here.
00:52:39Keep the change.
00:52:42Yes, you're right, Wallace.
00:52:45It's at a time like this that I realize what an old bachelor like me has missed.
00:52:48A toast to Mr. Hopkins.
00:52:51May he live to enjoy more birthdays with continued health and prosperity.
00:52:54Here, here. To the champ. Here's to you, Grandpa.
00:52:57Down the hatch, fellas. I can't go to the stuff myself.
00:53:01Gentlemen, we'd better get to the lodge.
00:53:04Yes, you're addressing the Cindy Boomers who are guests at the lodge tonight, Wallace.
00:53:07I'll have Perkins get the coats, Mr. Nottingham.
00:53:10I'm sorry you can't come along, Mother, and hear my speech.
00:53:13Oh, I don't mind, Dad. Just you do the best you can,
00:53:16and I'll be sitting here thinking about you. Better get your uniform on.
00:53:19I've got to get going. I've got something special on.
00:53:22So have I, Mom.
00:53:25Mr. Carruthers, call for Miss Edna. Oh, I'll be right there, Perkins.
00:53:28I want you to promise me you'll be home early.
00:53:31Well, I'll get home when I can, but I won't promise when.
00:53:34Unless you promise. I'm going to have to forbid you seeing Mr. Carruthers.
00:53:37Oh, all right.
00:53:40I'll have the car and the luggage opposite the lodge hall at 11.
00:53:43The license and everything's arranged.
00:53:50Listen, Sap, I told you to lay off of that dame.
00:53:53You play your chips and I'll play mine, Whitney.
00:53:56I've made myself insolent on this bankroll.
00:53:59Oh, Mother! Coming in!
00:54:02Don't wait up for me tonight. I may be late.
00:54:05Well, not too late, I hope. Remember, an hour's sleep before midnight...
00:54:08Is worth five with your head on a desk.
00:54:11Oh, I do hope you'll all come again soon.
00:54:14It's so nice to have family all together when we have company.
00:54:17Yes, indeed. Good night, Mrs. Wallace.
00:54:20Good night. Good night, Mrs. Wallace. Good night.
00:54:23Good night, Mom. Good night.
00:54:39What's your morning about, daughter? Because the kids are all out again tonight?
00:54:42Mm-hmm.
00:54:45Seems like giving them everything you wanted them to have ain't left much for you.
00:54:48Well, if they're contented, I'm happy.
00:54:51They're wasting money as fast as they can get their hands on it.
00:54:54Automobiles, clothes, George telling himself bedtime stories instead of getting himself a job.
00:54:59They're having things they want, Father.
00:55:02When they were little, I tried to make them happy by taking care of them.
00:55:05Now they're grown, they're finding their own happiness. That's all you can ask.
00:55:08Rats! You're sitting here worrying your soul out.
00:55:11What are they going to get into next?
00:55:14They're rushing toward destruction as sure as you're alive.
00:55:17Molly, you mark my words.
00:55:20Now you better heed the warning.
00:55:27Listen, Mac, you remember her? She was here with me the other night.
00:55:30The little French girl. Certainly, sir.
00:55:33And I have your same table for you in the corner. Oh, swell.
00:55:36She may be a little late, but she'll get here all right, and let me know when she arrives.
00:55:39I'll be inside. Yes, sir.
00:55:43Here's to the dog that bit us.
00:55:46I don't want him to bite too hard.
00:55:49Don't be silly. This will make the pot more frisky. Besides, even he's young.
00:55:52Let's go to the Red Widow and dance.
00:55:55We can have a private dining room and our own radio.
00:56:04What are you doing here?
00:56:07Willie, you little snooper. Why are you chasing after me?
00:56:10I'm not chasing you.
00:56:13Then what are you doing here? I haven't been introduced.
00:56:16Oh, this is my brother, Willie. Willie, this is Mr.
00:56:19I know him. And all about him.
00:56:22Well, that makes a one happy little family, doesn't it, Mr. Stout?
00:56:25You bet I will. And I'm not leaving here until Edna goes home with me.
00:56:28Willie Wallace, if you humiliate me, I'll
00:56:31I think that arrangement will just be fine.
00:56:34And she's not going to laugh up any more of this booze either.
00:56:37Oh, Mac, take Mr. Wallace's order.
00:56:40Oh, the young lady is here. Shall I show her to this table?
00:56:43Oh, so that's it. Oh, you shut up.
00:56:46This is private. And anyway, I'm a man. That makes it different.
00:56:49I'll go out and see her. And don't you try and run out on me.
00:56:58Now's our chance. How about it?
00:57:01The Red Widow. I'll show them they can't spoil my life.
00:57:05Listen, can't you make us some other night? Honest. I ran into something here.
00:57:08You tried to fool me. You had some other girl.
00:57:11Oh, no, I haven't, Celestina.
00:57:14All right. You did good-bye. I will never see you again.
00:57:19Oh, all right, then. Come on.
00:57:35Charles, what time is it?
00:57:39Twenty minutes of eleven, miss.
00:57:42Well, he should be here any moment. Keep watching the entrance of the lodge hall.
00:57:45Yes, miss.
00:57:52Are you the official doorman? Yeah.
00:57:56Brother Whale, as Grand National Harpoon of the Lodge,
00:57:59may I say that I've spent a very pleasant evening with you.
00:58:02Who was that person who just spoke?
00:58:05That's the man you just said you were, the Grand Harpoon.
00:58:08No, you can't go in there. Get out of my way.
00:58:11What is the meaning of this, doorman? Who is this intruder?
00:58:14He says he's you. I am you. I mean, I'm Franklin Q. Whitney.
00:58:17Why, this man must be a lunatic. Doorman, call the police.
00:58:20It won't be necessary. I brought them with me. What? I told you so.
00:58:23Don't let him get away.
00:58:26You've got lots of time. There must be some mistake.
00:58:29Sure, there is. Mr. Whitney is a big business and mining man.
00:58:32Why, he's made me a fortune. He's a...
00:58:35I'll tell you who he is. He's a crook who impersonates lodge officials.
00:58:38In that way, he gains the confidence of members and sells them worthless stock.
00:58:42And this is Fraternity Freddy, his accomplice.
00:58:45But my gold mine stock is worth millions. It's...
00:58:48You're a poor, deluded chump. This man has never been connected with a gold mine.
00:58:51Well, where did all my money come from?
00:58:54I'll tell you, Mr. Wallace. Keep your mouth shut or we'll never get out of this jail.
00:58:57Take these fellows away, officers.
00:59:11Oh, I was never so humiliated in all my life.
00:59:17What does it mean, Father? Why did the police take Mr. Nortingham and Mr. Whitney away from the lodge?
00:59:21The Grand Harpoon and the other fellow are in jail, Mary.
00:59:25Mr. Nortingham... Oh, I don't believe it.
00:59:28It's the truth, Mary. I thought we were on easy street for life.
00:59:31But it seems it was just a swindle.
00:59:34We ain't got nothing.
00:59:36Yes, but things just don't happen like this, Father.
00:59:38There was so much money coming in.
00:59:40Yeah, and so much going out.
00:59:42Your dad burned up about $100,000 in you kids.
00:59:45And what you got for it?
00:59:47Grandfather, this is none of your concern.
00:59:49Ain't it?
00:59:50Oh, please. Don't let's say anything unkind.
00:59:53It's over. Let's just make the best of it.
00:59:55At least we've got the old house left.
00:59:57That's just what worries me.
00:59:59I never paid up the mortgage.
01:00:01And the interest money's overdue.
01:00:03Well, haven't we enough left to pay that?
01:00:06Can't we sell something?
01:00:07No.
01:00:09All this fowl they done, Swank was hired to put on a show.
01:00:12You don't own five cents for the nothing.
01:00:15But if there never was a goldmine, where did all the money come from?
01:00:18I'll tell you. The junk business.
01:00:21You don't have to look at me like that.
01:00:24When I first came here, I intended to surprise you by telling you I had a lot of money.
01:00:29But when I saw you acting like a pack of lunatics,
01:00:32I figured it'd be a crime to encourage you and your nonsense.
01:00:35Father.
01:00:36Let me speak my mind, Molly, because it was you that put the idea in my head.
01:00:39I thought maybe if you could give the children everything they wanted, it might make you happier.
01:00:44But when Ed was going to make a monkey out of himself with that harpoon fella,
01:00:48I stepped in and took a hand.
01:00:50I fixed it with them slickers to keep the money coming in as fast as you could spend it.
01:00:54Because I wanted to find out if one of you was worth your salt.
01:00:58Well, you showed me.
01:01:00Traipsing around, having your own good times.
01:01:02And not one of you thinking of your mom.
01:01:06Well, it's all over now.
01:01:09And if one of you has got a grain more cents, it was worth it.
01:01:13If I'd known it was your money, I'd never have taken a penny of it.
01:01:16Mary, don't speak to your grandfather like that.
01:01:19Well, it's true.
01:01:20If I had known, I'd have starved.
01:01:22I'd have scrubbed floors.
01:01:24That would have been a good idea.
01:01:25Your ma did it, but you ain't got the gumption.
01:01:28I'll answer.
01:01:31Hello.
01:01:33Yes.
01:01:35Yes, this is Mrs. Wallace.
01:01:38Yes, Edna Wallace is my daughter.
01:01:43Mr. Carruthers' car was wrecked.
01:01:48My daughter's purse was found in the car.
01:01:52Tell me, was my baby hurt?
01:01:54Tell me.
01:01:57Oh.
01:01:58Mother, what happened?
01:01:59Hello?
01:02:00Hello?
01:02:01What's the matter, Molly?
01:02:02It was the state police.
01:02:04Mr. Carruthers' car ran into the bridge about an hour ago.
01:02:08They think that he and Edna are both drunk.
01:02:10Edna.
01:02:11Oh, Mother, no.
01:02:12George, get your dad's car ready.
01:02:14Yes, right away.
01:02:16Oh, little girl, it was my fault.
01:02:18I should have been looking after my children.
01:02:20No, it was my fault, Ed.
01:02:21I shouldn't have been interfering in things.
01:02:23Oh, please don't talk.
01:02:24Let's do something.
01:02:26Ed, take me there.
01:02:27Ed.
01:02:28Ed, look.
01:02:29Look.
01:02:30Oh, baby.
01:02:31Oh, I'm so thankful.
01:02:33Daddy.
01:02:34Edna.
01:02:35Willie, what happened?
01:02:36Well, I met Edna and this guy Carruthers at a nightclub
01:02:38and tried to take Edna home with me, but they gave me the slip.
01:02:41Then our car hit a bridge, but luckily we weren't hurt.
01:02:43Then I got Edna away before the police arrived.
01:02:45Well, where's Carruthers?
01:02:46Oh, well, he's at the hospital.
01:02:48The wreck didn't put him there, but I did.
01:02:50Well, I guess you all got a lot to say to each other.
01:02:54I'll take a walk.
01:02:56What's he talking about?
01:02:58Father's lost all his money.
01:02:59Now, don't you kids worry about that.
01:03:01We'll get along somehow.
01:03:02Maybe George Dorgan can get me my position back in the printing plant.
01:03:06Well, he better.
01:03:07You've always been a pretty good friend to him.
01:03:09I'll phone him.
01:03:10I'm going to make us some coffee.
01:03:11We need it.
01:03:14Well, looks like this family goes back to hash on Mondays.
01:03:18Say, something must be done about this situation, fellas.
01:03:20Grandfather seems to be under the impression
01:03:22that we're nothing but a bunch of useless wasters.
01:03:24Oh, now that's funny.
01:03:25How could he have gotten that idea?
01:03:27Say, that old bird doesn't miss much.
01:03:30We must rise above our difficulties.
01:03:33Say, there's a lot of money to be made in radio,
01:03:35and I've had excellent training.
01:03:36And I have musical talent, and I can go on the stage.
01:03:39Look at all the money there is in that.
01:03:41Yeah, but think of all the money we ain't got.
01:03:43Listen, kiddies, we're only playing hooky.
01:03:45I'm going to get a real job.
01:03:47Honest?
01:03:48Well, I don't know how honest it'll be,
01:03:49but it'll help pay for groceries.
01:03:51Alas, how true.
01:03:56Ladies and gentlemen of the radio audience,
01:03:58this is the voice of experience speaking.
01:04:01The only way to lick a depression is to go to work.
01:04:12Where the heck is that station?
01:04:14Try around 120, Grandpa.
01:04:16It's station DYX, Father.
01:04:18Mother, I've got to hurry for the lodge.
01:04:21Darn thing sounds like it had the pimp.
01:04:23Let me try, Grandpa.
01:04:25What lodge is it tonight, Ed?
01:04:27The Royal Order of Bees.
01:04:29I'm only a droner yet, but I'll be a worker bee pretty soon.
01:04:37Well, be careful, Ed.
01:04:39Don't let the bees sting you.
01:04:41Quails harpoon you.
01:04:45Hi, everybody.
01:04:46Mom, here's the week in Slaveways.
01:04:48Watched it out on the mortgage.
01:04:49And here's mine, Mom.
01:04:50Did you miss the broadcast?
01:04:51Here it is now.
01:04:52Be quiet, everybody.
01:04:54Quiet.
01:04:55When you hear the signal,
01:04:56it will be exactly 29 and three quarter minutes
01:04:58after six o'clock.
01:05:00Boy, wasn't he swell?
01:05:02George has a fine voice.
01:05:03Oh, he's great.
01:05:04Is that all he's going to say?
01:05:06Well, that's all for another half hour.
01:05:08By gosh, I always knew that boy would find the right job.
01:05:10He's turned himself into a radio cuckoo.
01:05:14Good night, Mother.
01:05:15Don't wait up for me.
01:05:17Well, I'm going to take a bath.
01:05:19Well, let me take mine first, Willie.
01:05:21I got a date with Al Phillips.
01:05:22Don't call me Willie.
01:05:24Oh.
01:05:26Are you going out tonight, Mary?
01:05:28Yes, Mother.
01:05:29Willie's taking me to a movie, but he doesn't know it yet.
01:05:33Well, thanks to the children,
01:05:35the interest will be paid for the next three months.
01:05:38And you don't have to worry no more about the interest, Molly.
01:05:40Here's the receipt for the mortgage.
01:05:42Why, where did you get this?
01:05:44Oh, I bought it from the bank.
01:05:46I'll tell you a little secret, Molly.
01:05:48That money that I let the kids and Aunt blow in
01:05:50was just a drop in the bucket.
01:05:51What?
01:05:52Sure.
01:05:53I'll get a couple of more hundred thousand left.
01:05:56Why didn't you tell me?
01:05:59Well, I wanted to be sure that all
01:06:01learned the lesson of red lights ahead.
01:06:03I knew the money would go to them after I was gone,
01:06:05and if they went on throwing good money away,
01:06:07I'd be turning over my grave.
01:06:09Father, you're just wonderful.
01:06:12Oh, no, I ain't.
01:06:13Oh, I'm smart.
01:06:15Now, now, this whole business gets you all upset.
01:06:18Here, here.
01:06:19Have a little nip of good old Indian Joe's nerve tonic.
01:06:22There, it'll hack you right up.
01:06:33Ain't bad.
01:06:37Ain't bad.